What He Offered

Chapter 16: Confidence

Bones took a moment to remember that long-ago morning: there had, indeed, been a breeze ruffling her hair but it had been chill, and Sully had been at the controls, not in the stern. She recalled wondering, as he waved one last time before turning his face resolutely toward the sea, if she would ever see him again, the dear man. To date, she had had not so much as a glimpse of him, and he'd never phoned from Turks and Caicos, or sent a post card wishing she were there. It was as if, like some ancient flat-earthers were reputed to have feared, he had sailed to the end of the earth and right over its far edge. Would they have made a go of it, they two? She would never know now, but she did not regret the lost opportunity. She had everything she wanted, here and now, including more pages of Booth's story.

The Tale of Twin Booths, cont'd

Ultimately, it was both Vic and Brennan standing on the dock, waving good-bye: she at the far end, watching somewhat sadly as Sully steered the Temperance out of the bay toward open seas, and he, trying to mask his joy, waiting at the shore end to offer whatever comfort his company and a hot breakfast could supply. She didn't welcome the sight of him, and she was to remain touchy and disagreeable for days, but she hadn't left him, not professionally, and Vic, after the scare he'd been through, found that more than sufficed. The long game was back on.

Jay had phoned the previous evening with news of the decision, and she was still excited the next morning when, as arranged, Tim came round to the condo carrying a box full of frosted muffins from the boutique bakery they both favored. The table had been set as for a party with a gaily-colored cloth and matching napkins, gentian-blue stoneware mugs and dishes, and a vase full of daisies in pride of place. He surrendered the box to his hostess, and gestured to the table. "What's the occasion?"

She snipped the twine, and raised the box lid, all with a huge smile on her face. "It's a celebration, Tim! Sit, sit! The coffee's ready. I'll just put these on a platter."

Disregarding her instructions, Tim collected the thermal carafe from the counter, carried it to the dining area, and poured for both of them. He was just making room on the table for the baked goods when she walked up with the cut-glass cake stand piled with muffins. "Oh, thank you, Tim! No, sit, I tell you! I can pull out my own chair!"

He waited until she had slipped into her seat before taking his place at the table. "I'm going to go out on a limb, here, and guess you're glad not to be leaving D. C."

"Oh, Tim! I know I'm terrible! I shouldn't be happy when Tempe's so upset, but I can't help what I feel."

"No, no, of course not." He watched her tip three teaspoonfuls of sugar into her coffee, then ventured, "Is Brennan unhappy, then? Don't tell me, if you think by doing so you're betraying her confidence."

"Tempe's all over the map, as usual." Tim had the sudden urge to remark that Tempe was, actually, in Arizona, but he resisted. "Let's see: she's sorry she disappointed Sully, who, as you know, is a very nice guy. She feels a little bit guilty, too, because she thinks she might have led him on, which, as I told her, is absolutely ridiculous. What else? She's kind of mad at me for not hiding my lack of enthusiasm very well, and… oh! She's really angry at Vic."

Tim nearly choked on his muffin. He reached for his coffee, and washed the crumb down. "She's pissed off at Vic? Oh… er, pardon my French."

She waved off his apology. "To be fair, she's miffed at you and Angela, too. She wanted you all to make a big fuss: cry, moan, gnash your teeth, that kind of thing. She was waiting for someone to say, 'Hell, no, you can't go! What are you thinking? You're indispensable, the Jeffersonian will go into the tank without you, the FBI will never catch a murderer again!' You get the idea."

It was all Tim could do not to gape at her. "You're joking!"

Jay popped a bite of muffin in her mouth, and chewed thoughtfully. "Joking? No. Exaggerating? Maybe. Basically, she feels unappreciated. It was like when we were in school: Tempe could join a group usually, but if she wandered off, nobody objected. Nobody called after her, 'Hey, where're you going? Come back! We need you.' I guess this time, with her lab family, she thought things would be different."

"Jeez!" Tim shook his head in disbelief. "And, here we all were bending over backwards trying to put her happiness first. So much for good intention." He pondered the perversity of human nature as he stirred a few more drops of cream into his coffee. "If she's as peeved as you say, I wonder she didn't sail off with Sully just for spite."

"That's more something I would do. Tempe's too rational, and beside, it wouldn't have been fair to Sully. He deserved to be chosen on his own merits."

"She didn't choose him, though." Tim knew he was on the verge of prying, and though he tried to rein in his curiosity, the struggle was short-lived. "I suppose she didn't love him, or didn't love him enough."

"Oh, I don't know." Jay picked up her napkin, and was suddenly engrossed in wiping her fingertips clean. "It might just be the opposite, Tim. Tempe's always telling me I shy away from successful, charismatic career-men like… like Sully because I don't feel worthy of men like that, I'm not enough… woman, I guess. She's never said so, but I think, deep down, maybe Tempe feels the same way: you know, lacking in some way. If Sully hadn't asked her to decide so soon, if he'd given her more time to grow confident in her ability to offer him as much as he offered her, I think things might have worked out between them."

This was a speech so rich in potential significance that Tim, for a moment, couldn't get a handle on it all. To cover his confusion, he joked, "For a woman who hates psychology as much as Brennan, she sure engages in lots of analysis."

Jay looked up at him from under her lashes, and smiled. "It's your influence, Tim. Sometimes she sounds just like you, I swear!"

If Jay only knew the effect those smiles of hers had on him… or, was it possible…? "You know, you never did say why you weren't thrilled to go off on a year-long cruise. I thought you liked Sully."

"Oh, as far as that goes, Sully's a prince. I absolutely adore him, only… not as much as…" She lowered her eyes, caught her bottom lip between her teeth, and started to smooth the napkin she had just been rumpling.

Tim's heart was beating a rapid tattoo. "Are you saying you're interested…" He cleared his throat. "…interested in someone here in D. C.?" A tiny nod: yes. "Anyone I know?" Another tiny nod. "Can you tell me…?"

She shook her head decidedly. "Please, don't ask, Tim. I… shouldn't have said anything. Tempe tells me I'm mistaking kindness for attraction, that I have to really work on myself before a man like… like him would want a serious relationship with me."

Tim felt his old dislike of Brennan rising up in him again. How dare she undermine her sister's self-esteem? "Jay, Brennan has no business running you down…"

"Tim!" Jay raised her head, and turning toward him, laid her hand on his forearm. "Please, stop! Tempe's right; I know she is. Just now, I don't have the confidence, or self-respect to be any man's equal partner, but, thanks to you and Tempe, I've come a long way already, and I'm going to be a strong, independent woman someday." She leaned toward him confidentially, and whispered, "I'm training to be badass, Tim."

They laughed together, and the moment for sharing secrets passed. They polished off a few more muffins, packed the remainder away for Vic and Brennan, and, after having cleaned up their mess, headed off for an afternoon's wandering through the exhibit halls of the Jeffersonian.

When Tim reflected on Jay's revelations later, he drew an encouraging lesson from Sully's failure to woo Brennan. He had heard Sully say, "Brennan's the go-slow type," so he had, obviously, understood the paramount importance of patience. But, in the end, Sully had been unable to wait, he had pressed for an answer too soon. Tim was more than ever convinced that he and Vic were on the right track: the long game was the best strategy. They had only to be patient and endure.

Patience is an admirable quality and a great virtue, but it can be sorely tried, and Sully was just the first of many hard tests the Booths had to face as their long game unfolded down the months and years. There were many times when one or the other twin was strongly tempted to give up, as when Tim discovered Jay was dating, simultaneously, a well-muscled deep sea welder and an effeminate botanist, or when Vic had to stand by and watch Brennan welcome the effusive attentions of Deputy Director Andrew Hacker. They had their own low points, too, as when Tim, recovering from brain-tumor surgery, didn't know for certain which of the Brennan twins he loved, or when Vic, having had to take a life in the line of duty, was tormented by guilt. They were often, separately or together, pushed to their limits, but then, there would come an unlooked-for buss on the cheek, a perfunctory kiss under the mistletoe that was anything but, and the odd undercover case where they were free, because in character, to offer and receive the physical affection they craved. They made these very small comforts go a long way, they kept their eyes on the long-term prize, and they endured. Over time, in a process so gradual as to be imperceptible, the shell around Vic's heart thinned to near transparency and the largest wounds in Tim's heart scabbed over: their hearts were all but healed.

There came a moment, finally, when the long game appeared on the point of paying off. It felt to Vic and Tim as though they were in the final seconds of regulation, racing toward the wide open goal, the longstanding tie about to be broken at last! And then, cruel Fate came out of nowhere and blocked the winning slap shot just as time ran out: game over. Final score: two to two.

Calamity Day had been bad, very bad. But, the night the buzzer sounded on the long game was far, far worse. It was a Catastrophe.

Bones rapidly turned the page. There was one last sheet of paper in her lap. Smack dab in the center, all in upper-case letters were four short words:

END OF PART ONE