Behind The Scenes 4 - Meet The In-Laws
Apologies for delayed update. I'm lazy and stuff.
Robin stared at Cyborg, his mouth open and twitching up at the corners in disbelief. It couldn't be... right?
"A mother box. He can't have a mother box, that'd be... that's-" he stammered.
"Impossible," Cyborg agreed. "But in our line of work, impossible is every weekend. The real question is how he got it." Three hostile pairs of eyes settled on the villain. Even now, he attempted to negotiate.
"I'll tell you... in exchange for some time alone with the enchanting Starfire," he said, winking at the alien princess, much to her confusion.
"Enchanting? You are mistaken: I am not the one with mystical abilities, Raven is," she said. Cyborg glowered at Control Freak.
"You want a date with Star? How likely do you really think that is?" he fumed. Starfire, comprehension all over her face, wrinkled her nose at the idea.
"Um... no, thank you," was all she could think to say at that moment.
"Alright," Robin said, causing the other two to stare at him, dumbfounded. "You want to be alone with Starfire? I can arrange that. Just you and her and a locked door. You, alone, in a sealed room with a girl who can tear sheet steel like paper and burn a hole through concrete by looking at it. I can arrange that... unless you'd like to withdraw your offer and just spill everything you know." Control Freak, now in a cold sweat, swallowed what he assumed must be his heart in his throat and nodded.
"Sure... I'll tell you."
THE CAMPER RESIDENCE
Raven blinked the sleep out of her eyes. Her night's rest had been surprisingly... well, restful. She glanced at the bed near her own: Beast Boy was gone. She lay back for a moment and stared at the ceiling, thinking: yesterday had been a harsh lesson in the truth of their situation. She had allowed herself to feel safe, making dinner and having auto-pilot conversations with a similarly controlled Beast Boy. She should have known, given the nature of the show they were in, that nothing indecent could happen but for one moment, before logic set in, she feared it. That moment stayed with her, that sensation that they were prisoners. They had to get out. She flung back the sheets and swung her feet to the floor. Finding slippers and a robe near at hand, she went downstairs to find Beast Boy, in his pajamas with a robe and slippers, standing in the kitchen. He simply stood, staring at the appliances and cupboards, turning to grin at her sheepishly when he heard the door.
"Mornin' Rae!" he said. Raven frowned at him.
"Why are you just standing here?" she asked. He laughed, self-consciously.
"Well, it turns out that Tom doesn't cook on the show. Ever. So when I try and make something, I get that pain in my head. Unless it's coffee. I hate coffee," he said, disconsolately. Raven shook her head.
"Well, I suppose that means I'm feeding us while we're in here. You know this probably means bacon or sausages or some other cliche breakfast food, right?" she said. Beast Boy inhaled deeply and sighed loudly, looking defeated.
"I know... I thought maybe we didn't need the food if this is all fake or whatever... but I was hungry when I woke up this morning," he confessed. Raven nodded, assembling some ingredients on auto-pilot. She had guessed wrong: she was making eggs.
"Hmm. Either we're just plugged into Tom and Lucy's appetites or it's somehow generating food for us," Raven tried. Beast Boy nodded, perched on a stool at the breakfast bar.
"Yeah, like a replicator," he agreed. Raven furrowed her brow.
"Replicator? I thought those were those robot spider things from that show with the soldiers walking through the water portal thing..." Beast Boy's brow knitted at her words, his face lighting up in understanding a few moments later.
"Stargate? SG-1? You know that show?" he asked jubilantly. Raven rolled her eyes, even though she had her back to him.
"You and Cyborg marathoned the whole show last week, I was bound to pick up a few things. But how is that relevant to our food?" she responded. Beast Boy shook his head.
"No, I meant the other replicators. From Star Trek." Raven was nonplussed, so he elaborated. "Okay, in Stargate, they call the spider things replicators, right? Right. Well, in Star Trek, they had replicators on the ships that could make any food you wanted. That's what I meant." Raven nodded her understanding.
"I get it... I think. I don't know how you keep all of these franchises straight in your head," she muttered. He grinned at her back.
"Years of practice, Rae," he laughed. She smiled at the eggs in the pan. While not really paying attention, her hands had also cooked some peeled tomatoes and buttered bread for each of them. The little breakfast was assembled and placed on the bar. Beast Boy clutched his fork with more than a little apprehension. Unsurprisingly, he opted for the tomatoes first.
"Remember, Beast Boy: they aren't real," she said gently.
"I know... but they smell real," he mumbled.
"Why won't you eat eggs, anyway? I get not eating meat but eggs like this would never hatch into chicks - they were never fertilized," Raven asked. He reluctantly put an egg between two slices of bread and munched his sandwich with his eyes closed.
"Yeah, I know. Never been good at doin' stuff half-way, y'know? All or nothin'?" Raven smiled at him, knowing he couldn't see her. However, his eyes opened suddenly, letting him see her smile in its entirety. He did nothing but smile in return. Raven felt an electric and utterly unfamiliar jolt in her belly.
'What the heck was that?'
CONTROL FREAK'S LAIR
"eBay?!" Cyborg cried. "You expect us to believe you bought a freakin' mother box on eBay?" Control Freak cowered in Cyborg's shadow.
"I swear, I did! Lots of villains use auction sites as a cover for trading illicit goods. If you don't know what to look for, you'd never suspect. There are always normal items to send to people who try to buy the decoy stuff too!" Robin was suddenly very glad he had asked Cyborg to record their chat with Control Freak: this information would be very useful to them and their allies.
"Keep. Talking," he said. Control Freak nodded.
"Before I met you, before I was Control Freak, I designed my holographic projectors, a precursor to the emitters I use to generate the hard-light images of my 'minions'. I sold the rights to a tech company for... a lot of money. MIllions," he explained. Cyborg let out a low whistle. "I wanted to make the next step and needed a more powerful computer... I decided I needed something more powerful than what is available. On Earth, anyway. Eventually, I tracked down someone who claimed to have parts and schematics for a mother box: I could follow them easily enough, even though I didn't always know what I was building. The parts that were supplied were the key components, things no-one could hope to copy. It took almost all the money I had left but I got it... and built it. That's about when I decided to try the supervillain thing. Turns out I found my calling..." he said, wistfully. Cyborg snorted derisively while Robin shook his head in disbelief.
"You threw away a fortune and gave up technology that would have changed the modern world and made you richer than Bruce Wayne for this?" he said, waving his hands around at Control Freak's "lair". "For this?!"
"Well... yeah," Control Freak admitted. Robin slapped his hand to his face.
"This guy is even crazier than I thought..." he mumbled. Cyborg looked thoughtfully between Control Freak and his homemade mother box.
"Did you say schematics?"
THE CAMPER RESIDENCE
Raven and Beast Boy had finished their breakfast and gotten washed and dressed. Beast Boy had revealed that this 'episode' was set on a Saturday, so he didn't even have to pretend to go to work. They had played out a dull scene where Beast Boy sat reading a nonsense newspaper and bantering with Raven while she flitted around the set with a feather duster. And all to the sound of canned laughter. Raven decided again that she would punch Control Freak in the face. Afterward, Raven sat on the couch with Beast Boy and grumbled - the dusting had made her nose itch.
"So what's this episode about?" she asked. Beast Boy, now folding up the paper, turned to face her.
"Tom and Lucy's parents come to visit. Standard in-law conflict stuff. Nothing too traumatic, if I remember. Tom's come first and get their visit stepped on by Lucy's parents," he explained. As he finished speaking, the doorbell rang and Raven felt the pressure in her head. She stood and went to open the door with Beast Boy standing and waiting in the living room. Raven let Tom's parents in, not even paying attention to the words spilling out of her mouth. They looked a little familiar... perhaps she had seen the show in passing once or twice. Then she saw Beast Boy, standing utterly still with wide, frantic eyes.
"Dad? M-Mommy?" he whispered. Raven's heart dropped into her shoes.
'Oh no...'
Oh deary dear! So much for nothing traumatic, BB! Suffice to say, I don't own Stargate or Star Trek either. In fact, would shows like that even work in a world that has openly alien inhabitants? We'll never know. Anyway, hope this was worth the wait. Enjoy!
-Jack