Dis entered her brother's bedchamber to find him kneeling by the bed, weeping into his unconscious wife's chest. He did not hear her come in, and she just stood there for a moment taking in the sad, sad scene. Before this moment she had been livid with Thorin; for his treatment of Ila and the banishment of her youngest. She had resolved to maintain her composure until Ila made it out of the woods. Ila needed her attention, and she could lay into Thorin once Ila was safe again.

But now, she felt her anger slipping away from her as she beheld her brother. That there was a sickness in their family was not his fault. He had a good heart, the best of hearts, she knew that. She also knew that he loved Ila more than anything in the world. She did not want to think about what it would do to him if she did not make it through the night. Dis did not believe he would ever recover from such a loss.

Walking quietly up behind him so she did not alarm him in his state, Dis laid a gentle hand on Thorin's shoulder.

He jerked a tiny bit, and withdrew from his wife's chest to look up at his sister, still on his knees by the bed.

Thorin, her strong and proud older brother, looked nothing like a king tonight. His eyes were bloodshot and his face wet with unmanly tears. His face was red and he sniffled, though he did not even try to hold back the flood of tears. The look in his eyes was absolutely forlorn, and Dis felt her heart breaking all over again for him. She was surprised she could feel anymore grief at the moment, but she loved her brother.

Thorin seemed to be pleading with his eyes for her to do something, anything except berate him for causing all of this pain-which is what he expected her to do. But instead, without a word, Dis pulled Thorin's face to her chest. He folded into her like a rag doll, weeping anew into her bosom. Dis stroked his hair, the way she would have Fili or Kili when they were tiny dwarflings needing comfort after they skinned a knee or got a new bruise from playing too rough. She tried to soothe him, but could think of no comforting words to say. So she just held him, and forestalled a new flood of her own tears as she regarded Ila.

She did not seem to have improved any. Her breathing was shallow and she was deathly pale. Dis wished Oin would return already, not that she believed there was anything else he could do. Now all they could do was wait it out, and pray Ila was strong enough to see this through.

Some time passed, and Oin did return, as did Zahra, looking pale herself. Dis thought she'd heard some quarrelling in the antechamber earlier but didn't dare leave Ila or Thorin. Besides it had been rather brief, had it continued perhaps she would have investigated. This was no time for a lover's quarrel.

Oin checked Ila once again and shook his head in consternation.

"If the fever would only break. Her body is fighting, but she only grows weaker. The best I can do is try and make her comfortable." He said sadly.

"Is she in pain?" Thorin asked. He was sitting on the side of the bed, Dis standing behind him and practically holding him up.

"If she is I doubt she feels it in her state, but I don't know that I could get any medicine into her without choking her anyway. I have something here in case she wakes up." Oin replied.

"When she wakes up," Dis corrected him gently.

Oin realized his mistake and nodded quickly to Dis who squeezed Thorin's shoulders.

"Perhaps you should lie down, brother." Dis suggested barely above a whisper.

Thorin shook his head, but not with much enthusiasm.

"I must remain awake…in case she needs me, in case she comes to—"

"Then lie here by her side….your bed is plenty big enough. We will wake you if anything happens." Dis assured him and he seemed agreeable.

Thorin stretched out on his side facing Ila and let his great iron tipped boots hang off the bed behind him. He gently took her nearest hand in his. She was clammy but he didn't care. He needed her to know he was there, that he loved her, that he needed her to come back.

Thorin didn't intend to fall asleep, but his eyelids grew heavy and before he knew it he was drifting off. He had done so while telling her over and over that he loved her, that he would trade his life for hers if Mahal would only let him, that he needed her to fight. All the while he stroked her hand with his thumb, until he was asleep finally but even then he spoke to her from his tormented dreams. Everyone in the room pretended not to hear, and soon they succumbed to sleep one by one. Dis was in a chair by the side of the bed nearest Thorin, Zahra in a chair at Ila's bedside, and Oin lay sprawled over a chair a few paces from the end of the bed and near the fireplace. No one meant to fall asleep, but the night had been so exhaustingly eventful, that sleep soon took every one no matter how unwittingly.

Knowing nothing that went on around her, Ila had dream after dream, nightmare after nightmare. Kili chasing her through the halls of Erebor, intent on having her no matter what she said; Thorin taking their newborn babe from Oin as soon as it was delivered only to choke it with his bare hands; Thorin banishing her to wander the wilderness, to be taken in by none of their kingdoms in all of Middle Earth. They went on and on, and the theme was the same: Thorin hated her. Ila's heart broke with every dream, and finally she was having another kind of dream. Not a nightmare, but a serene, peaceful dream.

She was walking through a corridor, intricately carved and obviously in some dwarven palace, but not one she recognized. Not the Iron Hills, not Erebor. There was a light at the end, and it was warm and fragrant. She felt the warmth of the light beckoning her forward; she felt it trying to reach her, to seep into her skin and her very soul, she believed it would be wonderful, if only she could reach it. All she had to do was walk towards it, and it would envelop her.

Ila quickened her step, going towards the light, but then she heard something. Her name. It was faint, as if from a great distance, and it sounded like Thorin. She couldn't be sure though, but as she stopped in her tracks she realized something. She wasn't pregnant anymore. She smoothed her hands over her flat abdomen. Where was her baby? She didn't even know if it was a boy or a girl. And where was her Thora? She would be looking for her mommy….

Ila turned to look down the corridor from where she must have come. It was dark, but another light lit its end too. It pulled at her as the other did, in a different way. It was further than the warm and welcoming light, but she felt it beckon to her just the same. She felt that her babies lay that way….she only had to turn and go to them.

She heard it again….her name. It was Thorin's voice, she was sure this time. But he was nowhere to be seen. It was a soft, pleading voice, and Ila felt her heart breaking. She did not even know why, but pain flooded her at the mere thought of him.

She looked back to the light in front of her, so peaceful and calming. It was tempting to go forward, but her babies. They were all she could think of. She looked back at the other light, growing fainter as the one in front of her grew brighter. She was running out of time to choose, she realized.

Who was caring for her babies? Where were they? She had to find them.

Not giving the warm light in front of her another look, Ila picked up her skirts and ran back towards the fading light as fast as her feet could take her.

Ila gained consciousness slowly, her body feeling like it had been trampled by a heard of horses. She was wet, her shift soaked through with sweat. Even her hair was soaked. She was so very tired, she felt like she'd been asleep for days. What had happened? Why couldn't she remember? She also felt something heavy on the bed next to her, and slowly forced herself to open her eyes.

Thorin was lying next to her, completely dressed and looking exhausted even in his sleep. His hand was curled around hers, holding it limply in his sleep. Ila blinked tiredly, then looked around the room. Oin was asleep near the fireplace. Dis was asleep in a chair not far behind Thorin. Looking to her right, Ila saw Zahra was asleep in another chair by her bed.

This was all very strange, Ila thought. Then her dream slowly came back to her.

Ila looked down at her stomach.

There was no baby. It was gone. Her baby was gone. She heard no cries, saw no crib. Panicking, she tried to sit up quickly, but her lower half was so sore the shock of it practically laid her on her back again. Her moan of pain was enough to wake Thorin instantly.

His bright blue eyes were a mixture of surprise and relief.

"Ila! Ila-" Thorin exclaimed sitting up to reach for her. He was relieved, thanking Mahal for his mercy, until she shrank from him.

"Where is my baby? Where is it?!" Ila began to scream, trying to fight off Thorin and sit up through the pain at once.

"Ila,"

"What have you done with my baby?!"

Ila's hysterical screaming woke everyone in the room. Oin half fell out of his chair from the surprise, Dis shot up like a lightning bolt, and Zahra looked terrified.

Thorin was struggling to subdue her, reaching for her flailing arms that tried to attack and fend him off, while speaking softly and trying to soothe her. She was having none of it.

It had all come back to Ila, and she was more afraid of Thorin now than when they had quarreled in that very room. She couldn't but think the worst. She had to get away from him.

"Go get the baby." Dis commanded to Zahra who looked relieved to run from the room and did so without delay.

"Thorin, stop. Let me," Dis insisted with a firm hand on his shoulder. Thorin looked helplessly to his sister, but did as she asked, withdrawing to stand next to the bed.

Free of Thorin, Ila threw herself at Dis. Dis sat on the bed, taking Ila in her arms.

"Shhhhh, shhhhh. Be calm, you've been through a lot child." Dis soothed, rocking her gently and making her be still.

"You don't understand Dis! He thinks—" Ila began, hazel eyes wide and mad, looking at Thorin like he was a bear in the room and for some reason no one seemed concerned.

"I know, I know dear. It's alright now. Everything is alright." Dis murmured softly. Ila fell silent, but still looked terrified. She shook in Dis's arms, refusing to look at Thorin.

Oin had finally collected himself and made his way over to examine Ila as best he could while Dis held her.

"Your fever has broken, my queen. And you seem to have regained a bit of energy."

Ila wasn't listening. She was shaking, wanting her baby. She wouldn't believe it was alright until she saw it herself.

"You need to lay back down," Oin urged, concerned by her trembling, not knowing it was due to Thorin's presence. Thorin was still standing, afraid to make a move. She had acted like his touch burned her, went mad when he spoke. She had come back to him, but she was not the same. Would she ever be? This was his fault too. He had been so worried about her body, but now it was her heart and soul that might never heal.

The moments between Zahra's exit and arrival were painfully long and awkward. No one would acknowledge Thorin, Ila could not be comforted nor would she cooperate with Oin trying to examine her. Finally, the doors opened with Zahra and Dwala carrying the prince.

"There he is, all safe and sound." Dis soothed and Ila thrust her arms out, being held on the bed only by Dis.

Dwala placed the fussing bundle in Ila's arms and she quickly examined the babe, as though expecting to find him ill or abused. Everyone exchanged uneasy looks, but finally Ila was satisfied that her baby was unharmed. Ila's breath began to return to something resembling normal, and she settled herself against the headboard, the babe held snuggly to her breast. It was then she began to cry, cuddling her newborn and never taking her eyes from him.

"He is a good size your majesty, though not quite as large as he might have been had he stayed in another week or two. Nothing your milk and love won't soon rectify though," Oin assured Ila.

Ila gently stroked the babe's face as she whispered sorrowfully, "You should still be in my belly."

The room breathed a collective sigh of relief at Ila's now calm demeanor. Dis still sat next to her, with Dwala and Ila standing dutifully close to their queen.

Hopeful, Thorin broke the silence.

"Is our son not perfect my dear?" he asked sweetly.

Ila's face changed so dramatically it was frightening. Where she had been staring at her babe adoringly, she now glared at him with more hatred than he had ever seen in any dwarf's face.

"So," she began quietly, "you believe that he is yours now? And tell me what has changed your mind?!"

Ila roared at him like a lioness, angling her body so that she held the babe away from him as though to protect it.

Oin looked absolutely scandalized. Clearly he had missed all of the drama concerning Kili in his attentiveness to Ila and the baby. Zahra turned red as a tomato, Dwala looked at Thorin accusingly, and Dis looked sadly at the floor.

Thorin felt his mouth dry out. He had no words to defend himself. He had expected her to be hurt, furious even, but not for her to believe he would harm the baby. Especially after he knew it was his own.

"Darling, if I could but speak to you in private—" he began tentatively, but Ila was having none of it.

"No! I will never be alone with you again! Get away from me and my baby!" She screamed and seemed once again on the verge of hysterics, and Zahra and Dwala swooped in beside her in attempt to calm her before that happened.

"I believe it's best if you go, brother." Dis said quietly, and when he looked desperately from Ila to her, Dis rose to gently usher him from his own bedchamber.

Thorin moved slowly, mechanically, turning every two or three steps to look at Ila. If he could just apologize and convince her of how much he loved her and their babe, she would forgive. She had to.

"Come on," Dis urged, pushing him from the room. He turned to face her in the anteroom, on the verge of hysterics himself now.

"Dis-you have to talk to her, convince her—"

"And tell her what? That you have a sickness in you that that makes you mad with jealousy and possessiveness? That she must turn the other cheek when you accuse her of adultery, and allow you to manhandle her?"

Thorin began to interrupt her but she talked over him. "Don't tell me that you didn't- that she fell on her own. You were consumed with rage and mishandled her, her in her very fragile state. And you almost killed her and the babe. I will not make excuses for you, Thorin. I will not tell her she must accept what she does not have to. Perhaps she can forgive you in time, I believe she loves you, but you cannot expect her to forgive you immediately, or welcome your presence at the moment."

Thorin swallowed hard, staring back at his sister and barely believing what she'd said. It hurt mostly because it was all true. That he was a jealous monster, that this was all his fault, and that his wife might never forgive him. Sick with grief and heartbreak, Thorin turned from her without a word.

He walked slowly from the room, having no idea where in the palace he intended to go, but he could not stay there. Erebor had many rooms, he would have the servants make a temporary chamber for him, until Ila could stand the sight of him again. Until…he thought bitterly. Knowing now that day might never come.

Dis had wanted to comfort him, to take him in her arms and tell him it would be alright. That Ila would forgive him, and love him again, but she could make no such promises. Besides, he needed to learn from this, if it was not too late to learn a lesson in this instance. Dis sighed, and prayed to Mahal that for both Ila's and Thorin's sakes that Ila could find a way to forgive him.

Dis returned to the bedchamber, where Oin was just finishing up. Dwala and Zahra had managed to calm Ila enough so that Oin could examine Ila's lower half while she concentrated on her baby.

"You appear to be healing nicely my lady. You lost a lot of blood, but your fever has broken. Plenty of rest and you should be fine. But you must stay in bed for a few days."

Ila nodded absently, she had no care for herself now that her baby was in her arms. Her son, her prince. Erebor had a true heir now, she had done her duty as a wife and queen.

That thought brought her little joy. Wife and queen. Wife to a mad dwarf, who would have killed her and his own baby in his blind rage, and willingness to believe the very worst about her, none of which was true at all.

Ila was furious, but her anger came nowhere near her pain. How could she ever forgive him? Ever let him touch her again? It was all over. They were strangers now. There was no more 'they,' for her.

"Where is Thora?" Ila asked, looking up from her babe finally.

"Dis had her cared for by her own maid last night, while we tended to you and the prince. I will send for her?" Zahra asked.

Ila nodded that Zahra rose to comply, Oin gathering his things and following her out. That left only Dwala with Ila, and when the door closed Ila burst into new tears.

"Oh Ila," Dwala said, sitting down on the bed to hold her.

"He thought I cheated on him with Kili, Dwala. That the baby wasn't his. Our baby…our poor baby." Ila sobbed. "He was so angry…he accused me of trying to get rid of Thora when she was in my womb, that I have loved Kili ever since I came to the Mountain!"

"He was mad with jealousy Ila. And with good reason concerning Kili."

"You are not defending him?" Ila asked incredulously.

"Of course not! But he has come to his senses Ila, I assure you. He has been mad with worry for you. And he now knows the babe is his and Kili is to blame, not you."

"It changes nothing!" Ila wailed. "I cannot simply forget this!"

"No one is asking you to, Ila. No one. Don't worry about that right now, just bond with your baby. He doesn't even have a name."

Ila sniffled. "My poor son, what shall I call you? You deserve better than your father's name."

Dwala felt so sorrowful for Ila. Her heart was broken, perhaps beyond repair. There was nothing she could say to make it better.

Dis reentered the room, never lacking her regal grace despite her present feelings, and sat once more on Ila's bedside.

"Why are you crying now my dear?" Dis asked.

Ila thought it should be obvious, but she didn't have the heart to be angry with Dis, not after how she must feel if she knew what Kili had done. And she was sure she did.

"He doesn't even have a name…" Ila said, more to herself than anyone else. "I don't have the first idea what to name him."

Of course, Dis thought. That was something she and Thorin should have done together, he cradling her as she cradled their babe, as it had been with Thora.

"I could offer some suggestions. You are of course familiar with our mutual family tree.

Ila was familiar. Thorin's grandfather was the older brother of her great-grandfather. And many of the names had been reused time and again. Thorin was the second of his name.

Ila nodded. Not that she cared what Thorin thought, but a name from their shared line could not be something he'd object to. And she was not about to ask his opinion at present. He would simply have to accept her choice.

"Fror perhaps? It is the name of our grandfather's brother, your great grandfather's brother, who did not live to have children of his own. There has not been another of his name."

Ila considered that. She looked at her babe, and tried to imagine calling him that. He was calm now, happy to finally be in his mother's embrace. Thorin's blue eyes stared back at her. A tuft of Thorin's black hair covered his little head, and Thorin's proud nose marked his little face.

"Fror," she whispered, and he smiled up at his mother. Ila returned his smile and kissed his head, clutching him even closer.

"It's a good name," Dwala said.

That was that then. Thorin could like it or not. He was Thora's namesake anyway. As though her thoughts had summoned her, Zahra came through the door with her daughter in her arms. Ila brightened at the sight, as did her little one. Stretching out her little arms, Thora exclaimed "Mama!"

Ila was overcome. Her first born could finally say her name. New tears came, but happy ones. Ila handed Fror to Dis so she could take Thora.

"My love, my perfect little love. I have missed you." Ila gushed and Thora clung to her mother's chest. Ila brushed her hair, which was now past her shoulders, out of her face to kiss her forehead. As with Fror, Thorin's eyes looked back at her from her daughter's face. It hurt, but only a little. She had carried them both in her own body, they were hers more than they were his.

Zahra sat next to Dwala, looking like death warmed over. Dwala was worried about her, but Ila was the present concern. Dis also looked troubled, and Dwala wondered what had happened to Kili.

"Erebor finally has a true heir." Dis said with a smile as she looked down adoringly at Fror.

"Erebor always had an heir. Fili would have made a great king, Dis." Ila replied.

Dis smiled warmly. "That is kind of you to say Ila. I had hoped Fili might have Ered Luin one day, something to call his own. He deserves it."

Ila nodded. "I'm sure that is possible. You only need mention to-your brother. I'm sure he will agree."

Dis looked sad, her smile gone. "Perhaps once, but now I don't know. Not now that—"

Her voice broke and she stopped in midsentence. It was not like Dis to lose control of herself.

"Dis what is the matter?"

Dis shook her head. "Only that….Thorin has banished Kili from the Mountain for as long as he lives. He is allowing him to go to Ered Luin but only as an afterthought I think."

Zahra hung her head knowingly, which Dwala did not miss. Ila looked away, tears welling in her own eyes.

"No…you must convince him—Thorin that is—"

"It is too late. Kili was ordered to leave before the sun rose, under pain of death should he be found here after sunrise."

Ila shut her eyes, letting a silent tear escape. But then she was also relieved. She would not have been surprised to find Kili dead after what Thorin had done last night. Then Ila felt guilty, guilty for not thinking of Kili until now. This had been his fault- none of this would have happened could he have controlled himself and been in command of his feelings-a Durin family trait it seemed, but she wished no ill to come of him. She had been so concerned with her baby she had not thought of him.

She understood why Dis was so grave now, and felt monstrously terrible for her. And for Fili. He must be taking it just as hard. All of this non-sense, over her. Men were fools.

"I am so sorry Dis…..if I could change what has happened-"

"It's not your fault dear," Dis cut her off. "We are at the mercy of our men I am afraid, and they are fools, the whole lot of them."

There was a resignation in her voice that made Ila ache for her. She did not believe that they should be at the mercy of anyone, not even those whom they loved. She had only recently come to that conclusion, she blamed being young and naïve, and being in love for always being so compliant and obedient with Thorin. Perhaps some of this was her fault; she had allowed Thorin to be too possessive, to dictate too much, king or no. She had, in her infinite and overwhelming love for him, forgiven him too much and too easily, had made too many excuses for his behavior. Perhaps she was a fool too.

Ila also considered that with all the loss Dis has experienced in her life, that she had grown used to it, and so accepting it was easier for her. Ila did not want to live like that.

"Well my dear, if I am no longer needed, I would like to retire. I've not seen my bed since the night before last." Dis said and suddenly looked very weak to Ila. Surely it was more her heart and less her body.

Dwala took Fror and Dis kissed Ila on the cheek before going.

Ila noticed that Dis had made no attempt to defend her brother, and with Kili being banished she understood why. She was heartbroken too. Ila tried not to think of that, it hurt too much, she hurt for all of them. She held Thora tight, rocking her back and forth. Thora was her usual happy self, playing with her mother's braids.

"Banished…" Dwala repeated "…under pain of death."

"If you could have seen him Dwala, you would have believed he could have done anything." Ila said sadly.

Ila noticed Zahra was strangely quiet. She looked as though her best friend was dead.

"Zahra, what is the matter?" Ila asked.

She shook her head, but her face said something was terribly wrong. Dwala wondered if she would tell Ila about what Thorin had made her do, and thought perhaps she should not, at least not now.

"Zahra, clearly you are disturbed. What is wrong?" Ila pressed gently. Dwala was impressed that she was as calm and attentive as she was, but then her children had done a great deal to restore her. And perhaps distracting herself was how she was coping at the moment.

"Oh Ila, it is all my fault!" Zahra suddenly burst into tears. Ila was surprised, and Dwala urged her to be calm.

"Zahra, perhaps now is not the best time—" Dwala began but Zahra continued over her.

"Thorin made me keep an eye on you and Kili. I was never to allow you two to be alone. Every night I had to report to him. He said if I ever told anyone he would send me back to the Iron Hills and I'd never set foot here again. I couldn't bear the thought of being parted from Fili so I-I never told him anything! I swear Ila, every night I told him nothing happened. But then I wasn't with you after the tournament- if I had been—"

It was Zahra's turn to be hysterical. She was red faced and sputtering, barely able to tell her tale, though speaking as fast as she could. Ila's expression was blank, but she finally raised a hand to silence her.

Dwala looked at Fror, refusing to look elsewhere until she saw how it would go.

"Zahra, please. None of this is your fault." Ila said calmly.

Zahra heaved in her sobbing, "But..but…but Fili says if I had only told him, trusted him, that he could have done something, intervened before all this happened. He believes as I do that all of the previous night's events could have been avoided had I only-"

"Fili is a fool too if he believes that. Thorin knew you loved Fili, knew he could manipulate you that way, and so he did. If anything Zahra, I only hate him more for what you have told me, and for you I can only apologize for what you went through."

Ila said all of that with no malice or ill will in her voice, but obvious empathy for Zahra. Zahra was so surprised she ceased to cry. This was not the reaction she had expected. Dwala was not sure it was the reaction she had expected either. For all her anger and devastation, Ila was taking this very well at least.

"Oh….so you aren't—you are not-displeased with me?" Zahra squeaked out.

"Of course not Zahra. And I am sure Fili will see his error of his judgment. He is just grieving for the loss of his brother."

Zahra was relieved about Ila, but not so sure she was right about Fili. She nodded anyway.

"Why don't you get some rest, Zahra? Dwala can tend to me just fine."

"Are, are you sure?" Zahra asked.

"Yes, I demand you go get some rest."

"Yes, we will be fine," Dwala added.

Zahra wiped her eyes and nodded, dropping a curtsy before she left the room.

Ila shook her head, growing more and more angry at Thorin, if that were possible.

"How dare he? Use her like that? Knowing how timid she is and how afraid of him she is, using her love for his nephew against her!" Ila growled.

"Yes, she was in a state last night, thinking this was all her fault. And Fili agreeing with her helped nothing I'm sure."

"That surprises me a bit, but he is probably beside himself. He must make up with her." Ila said.

"I'm sure he will, he is the more sensible of the Durins."

"They are all mad, save for Dwalin." Ila replied.

Dwala smiled. "He is hard headed as a goat, but he's a good dwarf, and a good father."

"You're very lucky, Dwala."

"And so are you, Ila. I don't know if you can ever forgive Thorin, and I'm not even saying you should, but I do believe he loves you more than life itself. He could not be driven to such madness otherwise, not to make excuses for him. That I will never do."

Ila said nothing. She was exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally. If only this were all a dream. Her dwarflings were the only thing keeping her together.

"Thora, do you see your baby brother?" she asked her little one sweetly.

Thora looked at Fror as Dwala held him close. She blinked at him and reached out curiously to touch his little hand. Thora was used to seeing and playing with Farin every day, and she realized this was not him, but was especially curious about him.

Ila felt some happiness in her heart, just laying there with her babes. There was only one thing missing.

Ila laid back into the pillows and tucked Thora under one arm. Dwala laid Fror under Ila's other arm, and sat close by to watch mother, son and daughter drift off into what she hoped would be a peaceful sleep.

Dwala rubbed her own belly, and smiled. Things were as well as could be expected for the moment.