BUREAUCRACY IN ACTION
Notes
There are still a few weeks till Season 10 and I'll just use some pretext for more Crowley x Naomi interaction, without in any way trying to guess what the new season will bring.
Spinning the cannon – I believe that in cannon Naomi didn't see the Winchesters as anything else than useful humans, but in this story, Naomi never wanted to harm Dean, and ordering Castiel to kill him was, for her, the opposite of harming Dean because his soul would come to Heaven and he would be happier there than on Earth. Not to mention that having messed up Castiel's mind so much, he could have misunderstood her order. When Dean confronted her about it, she said "he would hear it that way" as if her orders had been different than they were perceived by Castiel.
Thank you featherkitten for pointing out the inconsistency.
Disclaimer
Supernatural is a television series, created by Eric Kripke, produced by Kripke Enterprises, Wonderland Sound and Vision and Warner Bros. Television, distributed by Warner Bros. Television
The title of the chapter – inspired by Doctor Who "the impossible girl".
The Impossible Mother
Crowley's jaw dropped.
"What?"
Naomi sighed and pulled Crowley's coat tighter around herself as if to protect herself from physical cold.
"You, who call me a bureaucrat, you think you know about planning? About the patience to make a plan and the resolve to follow through? This is a story about bureaucracy. Sifting through oodles of data to get to the diamonds in the rough. Then spending decades polishing them... We knew of Lucifer's plan. We made the same calculations. Followed the same clues as Lilith. Watched the same families as Azazel. And we had to make our choice."
Who was "we" Crowley wanted to ask, but knew better than interrupt someone who was finally sharing a long kept secret.
"We had to be ready. If Lucifer had a perfect vessel, so should Michael. We made our choice. Doomed a family to solve the worst moments of the future. We picked them. I, I picked them. I picked Mary and John. They were so strong. So young and so strong. They would survive enough to raise Michael's vessel. They were strong enough that if either of them died, the other would be able to protect Michael's vessel. I picked them strong so they would day nobly at the right time."
Her voice was trembling. The words were coming with difficulty. The sentences were punctuated with shivers.
"So we made Michael's vessel. We studied John. Michael approached him during the Vietnam war. They worked well together. John was the best fit Michael had found since the beginning, and if the timing had been different, there would have been no need for... what we did."
Crowley wasn't even trying to hide the surprise. Naomi and Michael, possessing Mary and John Winchester.
"I convinced Mary to accept me. Not as my vessel. More like a hidden guardian. I was a part of her when Dean was conceived. As Michael was a part of John. We didn't do much, Dean's not a nephilim. We just wanted to give the child the best chance to withstand what was to come. I stayed with Mary for nine months, in a corner of her, ready to act if the demons came. We gave birth to Dean. Four years later, I was with Mary for another nine months. I had the chance to be around our first born for nine months. The moment of Sam's birth was one of perfect bliss and deepest sadness. I could sense John's and Dean's joy. Mary's elation. And then I was snapped out of her."
Crowley's mind was already re-examining his encounters with the Winchester boys in light of these revelations. Humans, with all the flaws and advantages of their species, imbued with angelic strength so subtle that Crowley himself hadn't been able to identify it.
"I did my best to watch over them over the years. I was with Mary when Azazel came for her, but I was forbidden to intervene. I was with her when the boys finally freed her from the house. I tried to protect all four of them, but I had to pick my battles."
Naomi closed her eyes like she was trying to contain at a particularly painful memory.
"Why do you think we sent a Seraph into Hell to retrieve Dean? He was our child. Something like this had never been done. You wouldn't believe the committee meetings we had to steer to get it done! But bureaucracy has its purpose..."
This time the pause was longer. Although Naomi was shivering in earnest now, Crowley kept his distance, unwilling to interrupt her confession.
"Michael was my commander, but Gabriel had been my mentor. And Gabriel believed in having a trick up his sleeve. Like you. You were the perfect hidden ace. I made sure that no one noticed you. All the things I saw that were extraordinary about you, I glossed over them in my reports. I altered the minds of our brightest operatives to keep you concealed. You were such an anomaly in the pattern that it allowed me to hope... If you were no longer on Lucifer's side, my boys might be spared their destinies. Michael wouldn't take over Dean, and Sammy..."
She shook her head and smiled bitterly.
"They survived, Crowley. They got through everything. I got them both out of Hell. I made arrangements so intricate that no one suspected that they were given a small edge. And now that I just got Sammy out of the Cage, now you have condemned Dean to something I don't know how to undo."
"What do you mean?" Crowley asked when she stopped speaking.
"The Mark will change Dean. Will consumme him. And I don't know if I can reset him from that change."
She slowly walked away from him.
"Naomi," he called after her.
She stopped, and spoke with her back to him.
"You have always been a wild card for me. Getting your soul out of Hell myself bound us. The ripples of that event went through each of our existence outside linear time. Don't worry too much that you might feel something for me. The connection will start to fade, and in a couple of centuries, you will forget me."
"And you will forget me," he pointed out.
This time Naomi turned and did meet his gaze. Crowley could read clearly that she didn't intend to be around for another couple of centuries.
"Crowley," she said. "I do not have a soul. What payment would you accept from me for a deal?"
"The next two hundred years of your life," he said, without hesitation.
"I am serious," she said.
"As am I," he replied. "I want you to be by my side for the next two hundred years. If you are right about the bond, by the end of it, we'll both be free."
"I can't meet your price."
"I gave you a discount! My usual payment, a human soul, is an immortal currency. I thought you were going to ask for something important. If it's not important enough for you to give me two lousy centuries, then forget it!" he said, working himself up as he spoke, unable or unwilling to say what truly bothered him.
"It is important," Naomi interrupted. "I just can't promise I have two hundred years to give you. I need you to take care of the boys if I'm not around any more. If I was sure I have that time, I wouldn't need the deal."
"Don't do anything stupid, Naomi," Crowley said, calming down. "We'll figure something out about Dean. We'll take care of Moose, until Dean is healed."
She came close to him, held his face in her palms, and pulled his head down to kiss his forehead.
"Even without a deal, promise me you will watch out for them!"
He was going to refuse, but the words that came out were:
"I'll do my best."
His mind was still spinning when she left. The bloody Winchesters were Naomi's sort of sons. Which made him... what? Their sort of step dad?
…...
In the following weeks, Crowley fell completely apart. The more he thought about his special angel, the more he resented the fact that he was a backup plan. That she had made Michael a child. He spiralled even worse, into even greater darkness. He allowed his addiction to human blood to consume him. To ruin his ability to focus on the prize. In a haze, he thought about getting Naomi back, getting her to promise him that she won't look for a way out. Getting her to fight Abaddon. He thought about using her like she had used him for so long. To do the dirty work.
Crowley almost lost interest in surviving. His efforts to locate the First Blade – pathetic. His attempts to find Naomi again – doubly so. He settled for Lola and for trying to stifle the sensation of failure by wallowing in partially cruelty free human blood, tried to wipe the feelings for his angel by sleeping with the most vacuous pretty demon he could find. He tried to forget about any obligations, promises, dangers. He took time off. And when he hit rock bottom, he called the boys.
He couldn't look at them the same way. He blamed it on his near brush with humanity when Sam called him out on it. He tried to blame it on a connection between them from all the blood the younger Winchester had pumped into him in that church. Which didn't mean it wasn't true, but it wasn't all the truth. Lying is best when there is a lot of truth in the words and only a sliver of deception.
The King of Hell wanted to restore his connection with Naomi. He understood her a lot better when, still under the influence of his quasi-restored humanity, he had to deal with changing the fate of his own son.
Crowley grew closer to Dean, the more he saw the effects the First Blade had on him. Some serious research gave him hope that he hadn't destroyed Naomi's son. When he was by Dean's dying bed, after he delivered his heartfelt speech, he saw Naomi in the doorway.
"Listen to me Dean Winchester, what you're feeling right now is not death, it's life. A new kind of life. Open your eyes Dean, see what I see, feel what I feel. Let's go take a howl at that moon."
In the heartbeat before Dean opened her eyes, Naomi whispered her plea.
"Promise me!" as if their last conversation had ended moments, not months ago.
He nodded and made his own demand.
"Promise me you'll stay alive."
She nodded her agreement and disappeared. Her appearance had lasted mere seconds, and all he had was the testimony of his supernatural senses to tell him that she had been more than a hallucination. When Dean opened his fully black eyes, in the room there were only the two of them. Two demons.
…...
Dean Winchester was a pain in the arse as a demon. Powerful to Knight of Hell level, with an Archangel in his genetic make up, Crowley almost expected the boy to challenge him for the throne of Hades. Instead, Dean igored Crowley more or less completely and went back to hang with his brother and Castiel, their connection stronger than ever. Crowley dropped by every once in a while. Sometimes they summoned him, other times he faked needing their help.
They were slowly adjusting to this new reality when the bomb dropped. The Cage was open!
With Lucifer walking the Earth again, there was little room left for petty differences. Crowley was once again positioned as the smaller evil, so the Winchesters summoned him to help. He had kept close tabs on them and knew why they called him.
"Hello boys. Long time no fight against Satan," he said with his customary façade of good humour.
"Cut the crap, Crowley!" Dean said. "How the hell did this happen?!"
….. ….. ….
End notes
Well, here's my confession: when I was thinking about clueless angel Naomi having to have sex with Crowley without any help from him since the poor guy was tied up, and because I started with the premise that Crowley chose a very well endowed vessel – I thought that Naomi might have looked for a teaching sex partner. One thing led to another and... I couldn't get out of my head the image of Naomi having sex with John Winchester, with Mary's blessing. In my mind, Mary and John became friends with Naomi while she was in Heaven. So much so that part of some very intimate girl talk, Naomi told Mary that there is someone she's attracted to, and the fact that he made her lose control. Mary sort of volunteered John to teach Naomi about sex. I think that there is no jealousy in Heaven and John and Mary's love was strong enough not to be bothered by this act of kindness. And then I thought that they might have even more of a history than that, so... the impossible mother. Anyway, this is part of Naomi's story. Hopefully, there will be John/Naomi smut in a story far shorter than this one.