27. Orestes

"Can you lick your guitar?"

I almost started to when Bradley whistled and then I started to laugh. This felt so ridiculous in this setting. I could definitely turn it on, and often did at that... but not in front of my band. I was one of the guys with them, not the temptress I was supposed to be right now.

"Think sexy, Liz!" the producer called to me.

"Yeah, Liz. Think SEXY!" John yelled from the sideline.

I flipped him off. "This sexy enough for you?"

"Always, babe," he answered with a wink.

Seth cleared his throat loudly as his eyes shot daggers all around. He didn't like John much.

"If we're going to do this and do it well, you guys need to go," I said as I pointed over at them.

The producer - Lenny? Lemmy? I don't even know - smiled broadly at me. "You all heard the lady. Clear out!" He watched quietly as they started filing out of the set.

"Seth stays," I amended quickly as he started towards the door, too. He turned back to me and smiled. "Get behind that camera, baby." I need to look at something gorgeous if I'm expected to sell my own sexuality.

"Alright, just the three of us, honey. Do your thing."

We were busy shooting until two in the morning and everyone was so over it at that point - everyone except me. I was totally fucking pumped, bouncing and dancing as we walked in the cold streets of Chicago in search of a hotel and something to eat.

We passed a group of people that I didn't pay any mind until I heard, "Elizabeth fucking Collins!"

I whipped around ready to snap, but quickly recognized the smiling face of the woman before me. "Holy shit! Mel!"

She flicked her cigarette into the street and gave me a huge, borderline sensual hug. "What are you doing in Chicago?"

"We had to work on a video. Do you live here now?"

"Yeah, I've been here a while."

"Liz," Brad whined, snapping me out of my nostalgic meeting. "We're starving."

"Oh, let's go get some food!" Melody said quickly.

She lead us all a block and a half over to an all hours bar and grill called The Edge, chattering excitedly with me. The guys ordered a ton of food for themselves and for me, but Mel said she couldn't eat here because she was on a vegan diet.

I couldn't believe I just happened upon her randomly, although it definitely wasn't the first time that had happened to me. I'd known Melody through my teenage years, and we had raised a lot of hell together. We were actually really close. When we were seventeen, she got busted huffing spray paint in this abandoned house and she was shipped off to a juvenile detention facility. I wrote to her for a long time, but we eventually lost contact.

"So how's the old crew?" she was asking. "Ana and Jess and everyone."

"I don't talk to Jess anymore. Ana moved to Washington with me."

"How's Darrell?"

I cringed a bit. "He's in prison for murder."

"Wow, holy shit..." She started picking at the edges of her sleeves. "I've seen you. On tv and in magazines and shit. It was such a surprise at first, but I should have guessed you'd become a rock star at some point."

I snickered. "I guess."

"Hey..." she began, a hint of mischief in her voice. "Come to the bathroom with me." And of course she had blow. She pulled out the little bag and without asking if I wanted any, cut out a neat line for me and handed me a rolled up hundred.

"Uhh... I'm good on that tonight." Or forever. Who knows?

"More for me," she smiled before whiffing up the blow. "Dude. I saw that video of you with the singer from Deftones," she said, giggling. "That was amazing."

"Yeah..." I cringed. "My boyfriend disagrees." And is possibly listening to this conversation.

"Tall, dark and handsome one?" She stepped behind me and dropped her pants.

"Yeah," I answered, full blown swoony just thinking about him. "He's awesome."

"Must be if he's got you making ick face at a dude you've dreamed about since adolescence." She redressed and sat back down, then pulled some airplane bottles of Jim Beam out of her boots.

"Aw, Mel... I taught you so well."

She laughed. "I know, right?"

She had a full six pack of teeny liquors and we smashed each of them in quick succession. After a long day under hot lights and little food, it was hitting me quick. I was dancing around singing, "Drunk in the bathroooooom," and Melody was giggling as we finally exited the small space. I leaned over and whispered into her ear, "Drunk in the restaurant, drunk in the restaurant."

Seth was smirking at me and she was eyeing me and the door.

"Baby?" I asked, wide eyed and fake innocent.

He feigned annoyance, but he was still smiling as he sighed. "Go ahead. But you better be careful."

I smiled. "Promise."

We set off with our arms hooked, bullshitting around and laughing together. I wasn't sure where we were going, but I didn't really care. I hadn't seen Mel in years but I could tell she was the same girl that used to come to my house in the middle of the night bawling her eyes out over her horrible father to drink her cares away with me. I trusted her as much as I could.

She swung down an alleyway and frowned up at the fire escape. "I hate when they push my stairs back up," she said.

"You need up there?" I asked.

"Yeah... I need a ladder or something."

I looked up at the staircase and it immediately slid back to the ground. "Not anymore," I smiled.

She eyed me. "You didn't become afraid of heights over the years, did you?"

"Nope."

"Good." She turned back to the metal rungs and started up, so I blindly followed.

She went all the way to the roof. There was a tent set up here, one big enough for four people. I was really curious as to why when she walked over to it and went inside. I hung back, staring at the tent as some type of light clicked on inside.

She popped her head out. "You coming?"

I took a few steps, crouched down and entered the tent. There was a futon mattress in here, clothes, blankets and toiletries strewn about. My eyes touched on an old, worn Hank III shirt and I had to stifle a gasp. "Mel... are you living here?"

"Yep," she said easily. "Trust me, up here is about a million times better than down there."

"You can't stay here."

She cracked a fresh bottle of Beam and swigged it. "I didn't have a choice."

I took a drink off the bottle and passed it back. "Well, fuck that. Now you do. Come home with me."

She half smiled. "I don't want to impose..."

"No, for real dude. Ana just moved out of my guest room. It's yours."

She looked like she was going to cry, then she threw her arms around me. "Thank you."

Back in my comfy little sunless corner of the world, I somehow found myself standing outside of the door to the La Push Community Center, wishing I could just fast forward through the next few hours of my life. I had spent years refusing these types of functions, because I'd honestly rather be doing just about anything. Fucking anything.

I eyed the pastel colored balloons tied to the handle of the door and rolled my eyes, stepping to the side and around the corner of the building. I lit up a cigarette and leaned back, looking up to the sky. I could escape right now if I wanted to; I could shoot straight off into the air. Work up some crap excuse later.

"There you are!" Leah stopped about a foot away from me and I shifted to blow my hit out in the opposite direction. "I've been missing you, sister in law."

I smirked. "Not exactly, but I miss you, too."

"Imprinting is more serious than marriage," she shrugged.

I noticed the faraway look in her eyes and considered something for the first time. "Can you imprint?"

Her eyes narrowed and widened. "I don't know."

I swear, I got so wrapped up in my own shit sometimes that I missed a ton of obvious things. Leah and Embry were an item - they had been a pretty casual, off and on thing until she got pregnant, and now they lived together in Seattle and planned on raising the baby together. But no one had ever mentioned if either of them had imprinted... so Leah didn't know if she even could, and Embry could at any point and leave Leah.

I was too scared I'd say something stupid or hurtful, so I just stared at her as my brain spun through the possibilities.

"We have a plan... in case either of us does," she finally said.

"Oh?"

She shrugged. "It was the practical thing to do. If either of us wants to go at some point, we're free to. We just have to be good parents."

"Do you guys... Like, do you love him?" I couldn't imagine having a conversation like that with someone I loved. Discussing what would have to happen if one of us suddenly wanted to be with someone else.

"Well," she started, and then Emily popped around the corner.

"Come on, guys! We're just about to start the games!"

I hid my grimace, put on the world's fakest smile, and followed them in. Leah and Emily were lucky that I love them, because otherwise you couldn't pay me a million bucks to spend an evening with this many middle aged women, playing games like Guess The Fake Poop In The Diaper and fucking Baby Bingo.

Sue smiled at me warmly when my eyes met hers, and she gestured to the seat next to her. My heart immediately jolted somewhere up my throat... I, girl who was afraid of so few things, was absolutely fucking terrified of my boyfriend's mother. Not that she was mean to me or something, it was just this thing with me. I knew there was no way she approved of me, and I guess I recognized that her opinion was more valuable than most in the grand scheme of Seth and I.

I tried to remain calm inside as I sat down beside of her. "Hi," I said, trying to smile.

"Hi, honey. Haven't seen you for quite some time."

"Yeah," I agreed lamely.

"My son taking good care of you?" she asked as if she didn't already know.

"Always," I half smiled.

"I-twenty nine," the chick calling for Bingo droned.

Sue put a little bean on my card. "He says you two have been doing well," she said, almost like a lead in.

I couldn't tell where she was going with it. "I'd say so," I responded awkwardly as the woman up front called another letter and number.

Sue put another bean down on mine. "I was hoping you two would tie the knot soon. Get started on that family."

I started to laugh out of sheer nervousness and choked on it. Then a sort of panic began to set in. For one, I wasn't there yet. I loved Seth, but the whole idea of marriage was such bullshit to me, and I wasn't ready for kids yet. And two... this was the absolute last thing I'd ever expect to hear this woman say. Maybe it was a baby fever thing; Leah was going to have one, but she wasn't as close to Sue.

"Oh, Bingo!" she suddenly yelled, grabbing my hand and holding it high. I was still limp, mouth open and eyes wide.

Someone came to me with a gift bag; I looked inside and saw a box of Rubbermaid food storage containers and a small part of me was kind of satisfied about that. I worked my features back into some semblance of normal and said thank you to the woman as she walked away.

"I, um... Well." That was all that was coming out.

She actually laughed at me. "I know, I know. Seth says you're not huge on the marriage idea. But I do hope you'll reconsider."

"Maybe one day." I tried to picture myself getting married, and it wasn't even a big deal... but that was the problem. Marriage didn't mean fuck all to me. What was the point?

I continued to ponder it, unable to pull myself from my thoughts. Sue eyed me a few times, but didn't push for conversation. I was trying to wrap my head around it... around why I didn't care anymore. I'd spent six months planning a fairy tale wedding that I never went through with, flip-flopped back and forth multiple times, then just suddenly stopped giving a shit and it became a non issue.

Did Seth still want to get married? He hadn't brought it up in a really long time. Then again, our whole lives lately revolved around my music stuff and crazy supernatural shit. We didn't have time to think about getting married.

Sue kissed my cheek goodbye before I got into my car. "Come for dinner soon," she said.

"We will," I promised. I considered telling her to shoot for a day when Charlie wouldn't be around, but figured she already knew. Plus, it sounded rude.

I blasted A Perfect Circle all the way home. I was grabbing my bag and opening my door when it suddenly jerked free of my hand.

"Missed you, gorgeous."

I was out of the car and in his arms, my lips finding his with ease. "Hi," I whispered against his surprised mouth.

I heard my bag drop to the ground and then my backside was against the metal of my vehicle, Seth pushing into my front. One feverish hand slipped beneath my shirt to clutch at my side, the other wound into my hair, pulling gently at the roots. His mouth was hot and soft, moving with mine until the heat moved lower, pooling in my belly. I was clutching his back with both hands until I was clawing him to me, begging him silently not to stop.

"Wow," he panted, his forehead touching mine. "So, baby showers get you all horned up, huh?"

I smiled, my head still tucked to where he couldn't see. "Babe... do you still want to get married?"