Chapter Six: Problems with the Not-yet Professor of Potions who is also a Potions Master
As Harry came out of the class Malfoy grabbed him and hurled him into the wall.
"Ow!" Harry said in pain.
"You have detention with Snape. Come along."
"Okay."
Harry followed Malfoy to the dungeons. When they reached the Potions room Draco opened the door, peeked in and then closed it.
"He must be in his office," Draco said snobbily. "If you had as much class as I did you might have known that."
"Whatever," Harry said, tired of Draco's taunting.
Draco snorted, but internally was quite upset that his carefully thought out insults were being brushed aside. Frustrated he dragged Harry through the dungeons, knocking on the various doors strewn about. After checking Snape's office and finding nothing, Harry suggested the Potions classroom. Draco said that's where he was going to next anyway, and soon the two arrived in the room, where Snape was waiting.
"I have been waiting for you Harry Potter," Severus Snape said slowly, his sallow skin glinting dangerously in the light from the bubbling cauldron, like that of a disco ball in a 70's dance club if instead of clothes everyone was wearing turned on flashlights and were doing a movement intensive dance that caused the lights from the their flashlight clothes to bounce off the disco ball repeatedly.
"Sir?" Harry said hesitantly. "You wanted to see me?"
"Yes Potter," Snape spat, "You suck at Potions and therefore need to have detention. Leave me with this boy Draco."
"Yes godfather," Draco said, smirking as he left the room. His response caused Harry to gasp and look at Snape in shock.
"Yes Potter, I am Draco's godfather."
"I had no idea sir," Harry said. "But that certainly explains a lot."
"Do you know why I asked for you?" Snape asked, peering at Harry with sunken eyes.
"Because you hate my father and therefore me?" Harry responded.
Snape sighed at that before responding. "Harry, I do not hate your father."
Harry was shocked, and his wide-open eyes indicated this to Snape. "But Dumbledore said that you hated my father!"
"Yes Harry, I do!" Snape snarled. "And do you know why?"
"No! Why?!"
"Because he was an arrogant jerk!"
"I'm sorry sir."
"You should be," Snape sneered. "Because I shall now take my revenge on him the only way I know how…through his son!"
"What do you mean?!" Harry demanded, quivering with fear.
"Take off your robes!"
"What?"
"Do it or I shall assign more detention!"
Terrified, but seeing no other way, Harry removed his robes, and then at Snape's insistence took off his remaining clothes. Soon he stood, clotheless and robeless before the Potion's Master, his young child-like form like that of a child.
"I shall enjoy this," Snape said, removing his robes as well and stepping towards Harry.
"Sir! Please don't do this! I am just a boy!" Harry pleaded, quavering before the terrifying malice of the master of potions.
"That makes it all the more enjoyable," Snape said, exposing his throbbing potions flask, clearly filled to the brim with mystical fluids.
Grabbing Harry and throwing him to the floor, Snape mounted him, thrusting his flask into Harry's cold cauldron, to the delightful sounds of his pained screams. The bubbling sounds of potions in the classroom provided a stark contrast to Harry's poor violated form as Snape drove his flask into the soft, supple cauldron again and again. When Harry could take no more, Snape emptied his flask of magic liquids into the cauldron.
"Thank you for helping me make some Venenum Potion, Mr. Potter," Snape said.
"Oh no problem sir. I just hope that we can put our history behind us," Harry responded as Snape bottled up the violet liquid.
"Don't be so confident about that," Snape said. "I still hate your father, and by extension you. I will not hesitate to unfairly punish you in class, even in spite of your assistance with this difficult potion. Now leave."
Harry nodded and left. As soon as he entered the Great Hall Ron ran up to him.
"Oi, mate! Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," Harry said, walking to the water-closet. "Snape's an asshole, but at least he can make potions, which is more than I can say about Draco."
"Don't open that water-closet Harry!" Ron said, grabbing Harry's hand. "There's a couple snogging in there!"
"Oh yeah. They're always in there," Harry said, laughing.
"Good one Harry!" Ron said, laughing as well.
Before the two could continue their merriment, Hermione came down and found them.
"This is no time to be laughing you two!" Hermione scolded.
"Oh be quiet," Ron said. "I will definitely never like you because you are bossy and a know-it-all!"
"Oh yeah Ronald?" Hermione snapped. "Well I will definitely never like you because you're poor and have orange hair!"
The two glared at each other most intently, sparks shooting between their eyes. Harry stared, confused and frightened, until a spark caught him on the cheek.
"Ow! Stop fighting you guys!"
"Okay," Ron said. "But only because I like you more than I will ever like Hermione."
"Ditto," Hermione said.
"What did you want?" Harry asked.
"I came to tell you that McGonagall wants to see you. In fact, she wants to see all of us!"
"That sounds important!" Ron exclaimed.
"Yes it does!" Harry shouted back.
"Let's go!" Hermione yelled, before turning to lead the two to McGonagall's office.
Once they reached her office, she seemed quite happy to see them.
"At last you show up. I hope detention was worth it, Mr. Potter?"
"Yes Professor," Harry said, abashed.
"You should be abashed! Detention on your first day!" Hermione said.
"I agree, ten points to Gryffindor for your astute observation Miss Granger. And I suppose five points for surviving detention with Snape."
"YAY!" All three said.
"But enough joy," McGonagall said sharply, bringing the three back to earth like gravity drags down a space station carrying seven passengers, the outer ring of the station burning off in the atmosphere, killing three of them and sending the smoldering wreck into a major population center, killing hundreds, while the main part of the station slams into the ocean, killing three of the remaining four and murdering thousands of fish. The last passenger, confident in his survival would then crawl out of the ruined station…just as a spark lands on a nearby oil rig, obliterating him. "We must go see Professor Dumbledore."
The four left to go see Professor Dumbledore, McGonagall awarding Ron 18 points for talking about Quidditch on the way, and Hermione 25 for not talking about anything. Soon they reached the Headmaster's office, where Dumbledore had been waiting for them.
"It's good to see you all again," Dumbledore said happily. "I have big news. Harry, your beloved cousin, Dudley is coming to Hogwarts."
"Oh no!" Harry said, mind awash with thoughts of the Dursleys.
"What's wrong?" Everyone besides Harry said, as Harry already knew what was wrong and therefore did not need to ask himself what was wrong.
"Well, it all began when I was a baby," Harry started as the memories began to return…