He didn't leave the side of the bed all night. After having just confessed something sort of big to Jim (and to himself) he felt like it would be appropriate if he were there when Spock woke up. He had to admit, he felt like a school-girl, but he was giddy that he had finally confirmed that he loved the other man. However, Leonard did not witness Spock when he first awoke. He had nodded off in the chair and was snoozing uncomfortably for quite a while before the Vulcan opened his eyes.

It took him a few minutes for his eyes to adjust to the dark, but Spock knew immediately where he was by the humming of the ship and the beeping of the bio-bed. He was in Sickbay, apparently in recovering from the mission they had been on. While his memory was failing him at the moment, he managed to recall a diplomatic mission that had been…interrupted. Inconvenient. He at once wondered about the safety of his captain and, of course, his mind went to Leonard. He was only unsure for a moment though before he heard the tiny sounds of snoring from beside him.

Gently, in order to avoid any pain, Spock rolled his head to the right to allow him to see the slumped over body adorned in a baby blue medical tunic. Leonard was apparently spending the night by his bedside which, he was ashamed to admit, made his heart jump a little. Through the low lights of the sick bay, Spock could see a few scratches and large bruises on the arms and face of the man beside him and he pulled his eyebrows low in concern. Of the two of them it seemed as though Spock were worse off, but human were fragile beings, and Leonard was not as young as some of the other officers. He worried about what injuries he wasn't seeing on the outside.

Though they were not bonded, Spock knew they had a strong relationship, and if he were able to touch Leonard he would at least be able to feel if the younger man was alright. So he gingerly reached out his hand and was just able to drag his fingertips lightly over Leonard's forearm. The calmness of sleep slowly surrounded his mind, but so did the day's worry and physical pain. He was alright, just a little scraped up.

The touching seemed to slowly pull the man from his sleep. Leonard opened his eyes with a sad sort of grunt and pushed himself up in his seat. At the site of Spock's outreached hand, Leonard grabbed on tightly with both of his hands and snapped to attention. "What's the matter?" he asked, his Southern drawl forefront in his tiredness. "What do you need?"

Spock raised an eyebrow. It was amazing how quickly he could go from sleep to attention in less than three seconds. And it was also amazing how much emotion the human eyes could portray. "Nothing is wrong, Leonard," he said quietly, in case of other patients in the room. "Please, remain calm."

Spock was the one lying in a medical bed and he was telling Leonard to remain calm? What was wrong with this picture? "I am calm," he snapped back. "I am just checking. You're nearly falling out the damn bed trying to get my attention."

"I am securely stationed on the bed and I was not trying to get your attention."

"Then what are you trying to do?"

"I was trying to make sure you were not in pain."

"Me?"

"Yes."

Well…that was actually quite sweet. "I'm fine. You're the one with a phaser burn right clear through his shoulder." He stood and grabbed the medical tricorder from the shelf and began scanning Spock's injuries. They were doing quite well…damn Vulcan recovery. Spock was god damn magical.

"I assure you, Leonard, I am fine."

"I'm the doctor. I'll tell you if you're fine."

A pause.

"Am I fine?"

McCoy scoffed and then gave him a devious look. "You sure as hell are." Spock's face turned a little green. "Is that a blush I see there?"

"Negative."

The doctor chuckled quietly and returned the tricorder to its rightful place. "All you need is some rest. Looks like you're healing up fine on your own." He nodded curtly and then pretended to busy himself with Spock's medical chart.

"Would I be able to continue healing in my own quarters?" Spock suggested. Leonard looked at him with an eyebrow raised so high it would put any Vulcan to shame.

"You want to leave? I'd rather have you here so I can keep an eye on you."

"You can accompany me if you wish."

Leonard had to do a double take. Had he just…invited him back to his quarters? That sly devil. Was that Spock's way of picking him up for the night? It wasn't as if it were the first night he had spent in the first officer's quarters, but something about this was different. They weren't there because Leonard needed help with his illnesses or needed to meditate or…or really for any purpose. It would just be the two of them in each other's company. Like a real date. Except Spock would be suffering from mild head trauma and internal bleeding.
"Maybe," he said shortly before going back to his chart.

Spock waited a bit more, as if he were afraid to bring the subject up, and then asked a question that felt much heavier in the air than it probably should have.

"Why did you wait by my bed?"

McCoy stopped what he was doing and looked up at the man. The question had put him on the spot, though he didn't see why it would have. It was simple enough, and had a simple enough answer to boot, but for some reason he was hesitant to say it.

"I wanted to be there when you woke up."

"Why?"

"So you wouldn't be alone."

"Why?"

"Because I care about you."

"I don't understand what that has to do with sitting by my bedside."

"I…" The doctor couldn't answer that one. That's what people did wasn't it? Sat by their lovers bedside when they were ill? Only, he and Spock weren't really lovers. They did loving things, like kissed in private, but nothing more. They only talked a lot. "I just was worried about you and sitting near you made me feel better, okay?"

Spock considered this comment for far too long before deciding on an answer. "I am glad you made a decision that was beneficial to you. You took your needs into consideration and acted based on them. That is good." Ever the one to turn something into a lesson.

"Yea…whatever." Leonard looked away again, distracted by the offer to join Spock in his room. Was that still on the table? They had moved away from the topic…

Was he waiting to tell Spock he loved him? Was that the real reason he wanted to be there, to tell him as soon as he woke up? That seemed a little dramatic, but he had been excited about it. Now, facing the stoic man, he wasn't sure he had the guts to do something that seemed so…big.

"If you want to go back to your room, you can," he muttered, still absently looking at the chart.

"Will you accompany me?"

"If you want me to."

"Would you like to?"

"Yes, I would like that."

"Then we shall return to my quarters."

Leonard nodded and put down the chart. If Spock was headed anywhere, he wasn't going there in his underwear, so he also fetched a set of scrubs and passed them to the man as he struggled to sit up. It was amazing to him that after such a bad blow he was already up and moving around. Spock pulled the shirt over his head and hopped out of the bed to pull his pants on as Leonard marked his release into the computer nearby. A moment later, he had a fully clothed yet barefoot Vulcan waiting near the door for him like a puppy.

"Okay, let's go," he mumbled as he walked past Spock and out the door. The air in the hall was much warmer than sick bay, which always tended to be a little cold and uncomfortable no matter what. Spock puttered along behind him quickly catching up, and then somehow managed to press the lift call for him and stood aside to let him pass. Like a gentleman. "Well…you really know how to treat a man…" he mumbled as he slid into the lift. Spock followed and called the elevator up to their floor.

As the lift began to move, Leonard threw glances at the other man. Why did things feel so awkward all of the sudden? They had been so great. Suddenly, he was hyper-aware of all his insecurities and flaws. He was messing this up. Why did he say he'd go back to the room? What was he expecting? Did he know? Was he even aware how awkward things were right then?

And then like word vomit, Leonard delivered the good news in the worst way possible.

"I told Jim I loved you."

That was not how you were supposed to tell someone you loved them for the first time. Spock was silent for a few seconds before gently raising his hand and holding onto the control bar. "Stop," was all he said. The lift stopped.

Leonard's heart was now pounding in his ears. What had he done? He should have just kept his mouth shut. He could feel his heart having palpitations. His breathing was increasing. No. No not now. Spock turned to him and he felt something drop into the pit of his stomach. He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the sound of blood rushing past his ears.

"Leonard?"

He tasted metal. Everything seemed so loud just then. "Yea?" he managed to grunt without vomiting. And then suddenly, a warm pressure on his arm, and he felt much calmer. Things were starting to slow down.

"Calm down, please," Spock said in his deep, soothing voice. Leonard took a deep breath and looked up at him. He looked a little silly with a bandage around his head, ears sticking out, black hair overlapping the white cloth. "You told Jim you loved me?" Leonard managed a nod in response. Spock showed no reaction. "I am pleased you are able to share your feelings with another individual. This is a big step. Is Jim someone you can trust?"

Well…that wasn't what he was expecting. How did his loving Spock become something about Jim? "Uh…yea I guess…" was his response. Spock nodded and made a pleased sound before removing his hand from Leonard's arm and commanding the lift to continue their journey.

Not another word was said for several minutes. They exited the elevator, made their way down the hall, entered Spock's quarters (McCoy didn't even comment on how hot it was), stripped down to their undies, climbed in bed, and were staying a safe foot and a half apart before either of them spoke.

It was Leonard who cracked first.

"You find out something that big and all you can do is ask if Jim is a good confidant?"

Spock seemed to find this surprising, because he responded, "What did I find out that was big?"

Leonard almost got up right then and walked out the door. "Big…the…I just told you that I loved you." Suddenly the 'L' word was a lot more difficult to get out.

Spock looked puzzled. "I have known that for a long while," he stated simply.

Now it was McCoy's turn to be confused. "But…I didn't realize that until I told Jim today. It was a big deal for me."

"Then it was good that you were able to identify your own emotions."

"But…how did you know?"

Spock raised an eyebrow. "Leonard, I have been inside your head. I have seen myself through your eyes. Of course you are in love with me, as I am with you." The doctor's heart jumped a little bit. Spock's eyebrow shot up even higher. "You seem surprised by this…was I unclear in communicating this? I had assumed my displays of affection were interpreted as such. "

"I just…well…no I just never heard you say that you…"

"Words are often unnecessary in Vulcan relationships."

"Oh, well see, I'm not Vulcan."

"Clearly."

Leonard couldn't help the happy little smile that crept up on his face. "So you love me, eh?" He chuckled a little. "Oh…oh no, that's probably bad news."

Spock looked confused yet again. "Bad…in what sense?"

"Just…love leads to long term relationships which lead to marriage which lead to…whatever. I'm just saying if we love each other you're probably stuck with me for a while."

Spock nodded. "That was my intention."

Leonard hummed a small response. After a moment more of silence, Spock closed the space between them and scooped the human into his arms, pressing his face up against his chest and petting the tuft of light brown hair that now peeked out from between Spock's chin and the covers. It was very comfortable in there, though a little warm, but Leonard cuddled close anyway taking special care not to bump any injuries.

His conversation with Jim resonated clearly now. He had wondered what entailed when being bonded to a Vulcan, but had always been too afraid to ask. Now seemed a good time. "Spock, can we talk about…bonding?"

"Telepathic bonding?"

"Yes."

"You wish to be my bond mate?"

"I…uh…to be honest I don't know."

"What would you like to know?"

"What's it like?"

Spock hesitated for a moment, presumably thinking of the best way to tackle a very abstract subject, then spoke carefully. "My mother has described it to me in the best way I believe you understand. When two people bond telepathically, they share feelings and thoughts, mostly at the will of themselves and the other person. It would be comparable to each of us holding one end of a rope. If we were to hold the rope at all times, we would be tethered to one another, but not interfere with the other's life. However, if need be, one of us would be able to tug on the rope resulting in the other's attention. Unless, of course, it is an overwhelming experience or reaction, in which case the rope might be pulled without the consent of the one pulling it."

Interesting concept, but still a little tough to understand. Leonard shifted a little in the bed. "Okay. That doesn't sound too bad."

"My mother has informed me that it is rather pleasant. In essence, you are never alone unless you want to be. It is quite intimate."

That sounded sort of nice. "So…how does it work with…sex?"

"Usually Vulcans do not engage in intercourse without bonding to or having been previously bonded to that person."

"Mmm."

"Why do you ask?"

"I'm just curious.

"You wish to be bonded to me?"

"Well…it…does it work like that for humans?"

"My mother is human."

"Yes…right. Okay."

"You are avoiding the question."

"Yea. I am."

"Alright."

Silence for a bit, but not awkward silence. Spock wasn't pushing him and that was very nice. It was like marriage, but no divorce. Ever. Because you were stuck in a person's head. And you felt everything they felt. Including…

"When you have sex and you're bonded do you feel everything your partner is feeling?"

"I do not know. I have never had sexual intercourse."

"Oh."

That was a bit shocking initially, but the more he thought about it the more sense it made. Who would he have had sex with? He was supposed to be bonded to T'Pring, but she ditched him for some whore and left Spock all alone. Leonard pressed a little kiss to the base of Spock's throat. He was lucky, he guessed, because if Spock had already been bonded to T'Pring he would never get the opportunity to be with him. In fact, if something should happen on their next mission like they end up are attacked by a bunch of mutated kids or some planet is being run by a computer who brain washes every one, and Spock ends up seriously injured or worse, Leonard would end up losing him for good. And he didn't like the sound of that.

"Spock?"

"Yes, Leonard."

"I want to be bonded to you."