Chapter 27:Don't Touch, Don't Speak

Elle woke up with a quiet groan at the many bruises she could feel littering her entire side, from left calf to left wrist. Cages made of uneven, roughly sewn together sticks are terrible beds. In all her life, Elle had slept on stone floors, four-poster beds, the forest ground, and the boys' cots. The cage was without a doubt the worst.

But she hadn't been expecting much else. She knew Pan wouldn't just accept her back with open arms, she hadn't even expected the Lost Boys to be so welcoming. They had surprised her with their actions: pretty much kidnapping her and dragging her to their territory, arguing and pestering Pan over her, huddling around her cage and eagerly talking over each other at her. But Pan had been the most surprising, she had expected him to kill her on first sight. Try to kill her, that is. But he had let her stay, despite his rules, he was letting her come back.

Still, being thrown in a cage by him stung more than it should have. Elle made sure not to let it show, she swore not to come crawling at his feet.

Just as she sat up, the door of the cage fell open to reveal the face of Joshua split in two by his grin. His grin was contagious, even though a small part of her seemed…disappointed. "C'mon then, Elle, let's go play," he said excitedly, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He reached in for her hand and pulled her up and out of the cage, squeezing her fingers before letting go. She stretched, wincing as her joints cracked and her muscles groaned.

Joshua, oblivious, started into the forest. Elle smirked and started after him, swiping the bow, arrows, and daggers that the boys had taken off of her the night before. They'd placed them on the ground near the cage, but didn't let her reach them so that she couldn't free herself. It reminded her of when she'd first arrived: both times they hadn't trusted her and trapped her, and both times she hadn't had any intention of trying to escape anyway.

The two climbed through the forest until they met up with a group of Lost Boys. Daniel, Harry, Colin, and two boys she didn't recognize. She matched their grins and hugged Daniel first. Her arms loosened instinctively after a moment, feeling as though she was being watched. Well, of course she was. Pan had eyes and ears all over the island, especially on her, and the boys were all looking at her anyway.

"Lucky us, you're not allowed ta be alone," he chuckled, winking as they pulled apart. Harry kept his arms wrapped around her hips. Elle fought a grimace at the reminder of Pan's mistrust, but she focused on how happy seeing the boys did make her.

"I missed you," she said honestly, receiving a loose, one-armed hug from Colin. Elle turned to face the brunette completely and gave him a small, honest smile. After a moment, he returned it shakily, understanding that he was forgiven. Before anyone noticed, she turned to the two boys she didn't know. "And you are?"

The one with blue eyes and a mass of frizzy blonde curls stepped forward with a shy smile. "Just call me Curly, and this here," he gestured to the blue-eyed, round-faced, spiky-haired brunette next to him, "is Slightly. We've heard a ton about you—not from Pan, of course, but the Lost Boys whisper about you sometimes."

He looked like he would've kept going, but the other one, Slightly, talked over him. "Is your hair really magic?" He asked, eyes wide and mouth slightly open.

Elle smirked and made herself disappear, only to reappear right behind him, just like Pan had done to her when he first taught her the trick. He yelped when she tapped his shoulder, and he turned, mouth hanging open. "Woah!" Curly cheered.

"Alright, c'mon ya lot. Let's see if princess here remembers how ta hunt," Daniel chuckled, smirking teasingly at her. She smirked. "Just stay in the territory."

The six spent the next few hours running around the forest in a mix of hunting and a game of tag. Naturally, they didn't do so well hunting, they made far too much noise. Curly ran into Joshua, who was actually trying to hunt somewhere East, and got a good smack upside the head for it before he convinced Joshua to join in.

Elle loved every second of it. The boys played as if she had never left, and it was so good to not be alone. Sure, she'd talked to the mermaids but even a girl could only be around them for so long before they tried to drown her. For the first time in months, she wasn't alone and her heart didn't ache.

They were playing hide-and-seek when she yelped as a long arm wrapped around her waist and tugged her over a pile of rocks amidst the bushes and trees. A hand clapped lightly over her mouth as the person crouched behind the rocks, pulling her with them. With him. She turned, keeping herself crouched, and tugged his hand off her grinning mouth. The feeling of being watched, which had really thrown her off during the game, didn't go away but at least she could look at someone who was.

"You better not make me lose," she teased. He could win hide-and-seek without even trying.

"I haven't gotten a proper hello yet," Felix smirked. Elle's grin widened and she threw herself at him, knocking him from his heels to his bum. He chuckled as she wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders and buried her face in his neck. She felt his arms snake around her back.

"Hello," she murmured and felt his chuckle vibrate. "I missed you so much," she whispered, choking on sudden emotion. She'd missed all her brothers, but she'd missed Felix the most. The first month or so had been absolute hell as she'd wake up, scared from nightmares, and alone. She'd spent her days without teaching him, or him teaching her, and it—among other thoughts and things she'd missed—had killed her.

"I missed you too, sis," he murmured, voice sounding as thick as hers. "And they'll never find us, you know I'm the best at this game," he chuckled. Finally she leaned back into her crouch to look at him. He raised his eyebrow, waiting for the expected questions.

"What happened when I was gone? Besides Curly and Slightly, I met them," she asked eagerly. "And what is with them anyway? How'd they know about me?"

"Nothing much, same old wonderful life as free boys for eternity," Felix smirked. "Curly and Slightly," he grinned, seeming a bit affectionate. "Remember I used to lead a band of boys in the Enchanted Forest, before I came here?" Elle nodded. "They are actually descendants of two of those boys. My second-and third-in-commands in fact. They stayed close as they grew up, eventually got honest jobs and families. I guess they told stories of me, and all our adventures, and their theories of what happened to me, and passed them all down. When the two came here," he chuckled, shaking his head, "they were in awe when they saw me. Really, speechless and everything. Their families stayed friends all these years, I don't know what happened to land them here but they seem happy."

"Probably are, especially with their legend," Elle figured. Felix just nodded.

He tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at her. "Pan got harsher. He was so angry, picked a particularly nasty fight with the pirates right after you left. Then he was just…off." He paused, and Elle looked down. She had nothing really to say to that. "He missed you," that got her head up, but she still didn't say anything. "You missed him." At that, she just looked sideways at him.

"Doesn't matter, I know he doesn't want me here. Too bad, I don't want to be anywhere else, even if he hates me," she bit, getting both angry and sad at the same time. Pan did hate her, and she couldn't lie to herself about how much that hurt. But Neverland was her home, the place where she was free and loved, if not by Pan then by her brothers. She didn't have anywhere else, she didn't want anywhere else. She'd grown since her time in the tower, she could feel the new strength and confidence she had. All because of Pan, ironically.

Felix interrupted her thoughts with loud laughter. Her eyes widened, this was rare. "Pan does not hate you," he breathed out as his laughs calmed rather quickly. Then, he completely sobered. "But he is going to avoid you. I know you won't crawl after him."

"Too right," she half-growled. He nudged her shoulder with his and stood.

"You're supposed to be hunting," he winked. She grinned and stood, notching an arrow and continuing hers and the boys' game, Felix joining them.

Sitting around the fire, Elle and the boys she'd been hunting with chuckled conspiratorially over their lack of food, due to their halfhearted hunting. Felix, Devin, Robert, and Michael just rolled their eyes and, at Felix's signal, kindly donated some of their own kills. Elle didn't need to eat much anyway, but the boys were very happy.

Pan was missing, but that wasn't terribly unusual and, quite honestly, it didn't bother Elle. The boys didn't waste his absence.

"Elle, why don't you just tell Pan your story? The whole thing," Devin asked, voice soft but clear across the bonfire. The other Lost Boys immediately quieted their bantering and teasing, all eyes on her. Keeping her face blank, Elle took a bite before answering.

"It wouldn't make a difference," she said, tone level. She made sure to keep her voice even, she didn't want to discourage them from talking to her but that didn't mean she was going to spill every little thought either.

"But then he'd really know you didn't betray us," Michael argued, frowning. Although, he was the second youngest so it didn't have the desired effect. It just looked cute to Elle. "We believe you, but he needs more evidence. The whole thing."

"No, he doesn't," she said calmly, continuing to eat.

The boys didn't drop it, though. "Why not beg him a bit more then, at least?" Colin asked, voice sounding strained. Elle's eyes darted to his and she held his gaze for a beat before he looked down.

"Yeah, he'd forgive ya completely, then. Pan loves his boots bein' kissed, especially by pretty girls," Daniel chuckled and winked. Elle smirked and glanced at Felix, but the blonde's jaw was tight.

"He has a point," came the quiet, gravelly voice. "He would be more forgiving, then, perhaps." At Felix's argument, Elle did frown.

"There's nothing to forgive, because I didn't betray him, or any of you," she said with a tone of finality. Conveniently, Pan stepped out of the forest right as Curly opened his mouth.

"Bedtime, boys," he announced to a chorus of groans.

"Can we have a party, since Elle's back?" Harry piped up, eyes wide and bright and completely missing Pan's mouth twist. Daniel, always the perceptive and smart one, didn't. Elle was grateful for it, and she suspected Pan was too. Not that she really cared.

"How about a bedtime story?" he suggested, and the boys nodded. "Once upon a time, in a land very far away, there lived…"

Elle's attention was ripped away when Felix's hand came down on her shoulder, fingers splayed around it. She vaguely noticed how big his hands were, and how long his fingers were, against her thin, bare shoulder. "Time for you to go," he murmured, mouth twisting down. She sighed and shrugged, she expected it. She walked away from the bonfire quietly, meaning to just go and lie in the cage and shut the door behind her.

As she crawled in, she felt a presence behind her, but hadn't heard footsteps. Elle didn't let it show, instead settling herself in as comfortably as she could before tilting her head to look up at Pan. He stepped forward and shut the cage, locking it. He didn't meet her gaze, but she held it on his face until he turned and walked away wordlessly. Then, she was left with the soft, far away sounds of the island as it too seemed to fall asleep, and the sobs.

"Come on, now, girl," she sighed, not in annoyance but just at a loss for what to do. All the night before the girl in the other cage had cried. The boys said she was always crying or begging them to let her go home. "You must stop crying some time."

"I w-want to go, go, h-home," the girl's broken voice argued.

"Why are you here, then?" Elle asked curiously. The boys and she wanted to be here, what was Pan doing with this child?

"P-Pan needs m-my brothers for, for something. I-I don't know," she sobbed. Elle furrowed her eyebrows. Then she remember why she had been exiled in the first place.

"Does he need them to find something? Or watch someone?" she pried.

"I think so, s-something like that, I-I think," the girl squeaked. Elle understood then. The object that could destroy Pan, the object he had accused her of working. She shrugged to herself, understanding his actions. If this thing was so dangerous to him, and the girl's brothers found that out, they could use it against him. Elle wasn't Pan's favorite person, and he wasn't hers, but she didn't want him destroyed either.

"Your hair is s-so pretty," the girl pulled Elle out of her thoughts. "It's comforting." Elle smiled lightly.

"It's magic, but thanks," she said softly. "What's your name?"

"W-Wendy, Wendy Darling," the girl said. "Yours? Why is your hair magic?"

"It was a punishment," she said, voice tight. She still didn't like talking about it. "My name is Elle. Good night." The girl's sobs quieted, and she murmured a good night.

As Elle fell asleep, she couldn't find the anger she'd previously harbored towards him. She realized she hadn't felt it in a while.

That was her routine for a while after that, she didn't know exactly how long and she didn't care. Probably a few months or so, the island changed at least twice. She fell into step with the Lost Boys, training and hunting and playing with them as if she'd never been apart. She was still the best fighter aside from Felix and Pan even without magic. Well, mostly. She still was rubbish with a sword, but she made up for it.

She still was sent to her cage every night, which was locked personally by Pan. Elle wondered if that was because he didn't trust the Lost Boys to really lock it. She tried comforting or talking to Wendy Darling a bit, but the girl just cried too much to hold much of a conversation. She was rather slow too, in Elle's opinion. Still, she was glad she gave the child some measure of comfort anyway.

Around mid-afternoon, she was lounging on the beach between Daniel and Harry. She was giving summaries of some of the stories she had read in the tower, and the two were loving them.

"All your stories have love in 'em," Harry remarked as she finished another. Elle considered that for a moment.

"Well, yes. I guess it's an important thing," she reasoned. "I wouldn't know much about it, though, I was locked in a bloody tower all my life," she smirked.

"What is love?" Harry persisted.

"I just told you I was alone all my life," she said, exasperated but laughing. "I don't know." She rolled her head to her other side, where Daniel was lying on his back with his arms behind his head. "Do you know?"

"Me? I'm a boy, landed here at 16. I don't know," Daniel sighed. After a sigh from Harry, he tried again. Elle smiled softly, always jumpy to help his little brother. "Well, in most a' the stories, the girl falls in love with a handsome prince who fights a dragon or something for her."

"There aren't any dragons in Neverland," Harry argued.

"Who said in Neverland?" Elle rebuked. "The stories are all in the Enchanted Forest. And you're all boys, the stories say love is a boy and a girl."

"You're a girl," Harry grinned triumphantly. "We'll fall in love with ya!" All three laughed at that. As if. They were brothers, nothing more and nothing less.

"Pan would throw a fit about that," Daniel chortled. "Distracted by a girl, gettin' soft, 'n' all that," he elaborated.

"Well, we do love each other," Elle considered. "Families love each other. What about that?"

"True," Daniel drew out the word as he thought.

"But what is it?" Harry reminded them.

"Brothers love each other because they stand up for each other, like how I made sure Harry got here," Daniel tried to explain. "'N' they make sure they're safe 'n' happy, 'n' all that, ya know?"

"But that's brotherly love, not prince and princess love. I'm pretty sure they're different. You don't kiss your brother," Elle teased.

Daniel guffawed. "No, no I don't." But Elle was quiet. Pan had kissed her, she remembered it, despite how brief it had been. Did that mean he loved her? No. In the stories, however, sometimes people would kiss many different people. And Pan wasn't fulfilling the other criteria Daniel had just stated.

"True love's kiss," Harry piped. The older two looked over at him. "It's always mentioned in stories, even before we came here, Daniel."

"Ah, good idea," Daniel breathed. "Love, like real love, must be like brotherly love but with kissin' 'n' such things. Ya want ta keep your love safe 'n' happy, 'n' ya protect 'em from harm. But ya also kiss." Elle nodded silently, that made sense, it fit how the couples in the stories acted.

"Ew," Harry whined, "kisses pass cooties." Elle giggled.

"Well, Elle, you're a girl," Daniel elbowed her side lightly and she raised her eyebrows at him. "Who do ya love?"

"Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I love anyone, other than you boys as my brothers," Elle argued, confused.

"Oh, right," Daniel mumbled, frowning slightly at himself. That pretty much ended the conversation as the three lay back and enjoyed the last of the sun. Elle did keep thinking about love, and their makeshift definition of it. Pan had rescued her from the pirates—eventually—and she knew from her own broken memory and the Boys' stories that he had taken care of her and done everything he could think of to heal her. That was something, right? Although, now he avoided her and locked her in a cage every night. And before that, he instructed that she be alone forever and potentially be killed by her brothers.

Her own feelings, that was another matter. She'd seen Pan upset only a handful times, and each time it had felt like something was tearing at her insides. He always looked the most beautiful when he smiled, that genuine, tiny smile that he rarely gave. Elle had slept with him, before being sent away, and she hadn't realized how good and comforting it felt until she'd slept alone in the forest for months.

What about Felix? No. She dismissed it as soon as it jumped into her mind. Pan made her chest and stomach do weird things, Felix was just her brother, the same as the rest of the boys. And she would never, ever, kiss Felix.

She was a girl, as Daniel said, girls always loved someone. If she had to love anyone, it would probably end up being Pan, just by the signs in the stories and that they'd come up with.

An evening a few days later, Pan finally caved and gave the boys a song. Elle had missed it, she hadn't heard it at all during her exile even though she was sure it could echo around the entire island. The boys added to it with their own drums and sticks and hollers, dancing around the fire, the same as Elle remembered. She was leaning against a tree, across the fire from the log Pan sat playing on, just grinning and watching, letting the music lull her into that sense of happiness and safety. Even Felix was dancing, which made her suspect that it was, in fact, a party for her return and they just hadn't told that reason to Pan. She chuckled, naughty boys.

Daniel broke away from the ring and bounded over to her, breathless and bright-eyed. "Ya decided yet?" he asked.

"On?" she asked, confused.

"Who ya love, girlie?" he teased.

"No," she chuckled, shaking her head. He mocked a pout, but turned and jumped back into the dance.

Elle chewed on her lip, she'd been thinking about it since their conversation. Looking past how things were now, Elle considered all Pan had done for her. He'd let her remain on an island, let her be free, have a family and friends, given her power. He'd taken care of her, when she was starving and first arrived, and when the pirate had hurt her. Pan had always been there, and now he'd broken his rules for her. A small, silly rule that he didn't really have grounds to enforce. But a rule nonetheless. Peter Pan had given her her life, multiple times.

She was tugged out of her thoughts by the boy himself, his hand tapping her shoulder quickly, like her skin would burn him if he touched it any longer. She followed him back to the cages, her mind not quite out of her reverie as she watched his movements from behind. Sauntering as always, the cocky, powerful Pan. But his fists clenched and unclenched with each step, and Elle could see the muscles in his back twitch under his shirt as he could probably feel her watching him. Damn magic.

She settled into the cage but quickly turned around to face him as he shut the door. As he slowly locked it, Elle laced her fingers in the bars right below his fingers, ignoring the bite of little splinters and how his hands twitched, stilled, then resumed tying the knots.

"Thank you," she murmured. She knew he heard her, because Pan's back stiffened and his fingers stilled again. He met her gaze, brown eyes flat but burning into hers. She forced herself to just stay calm. She meant that thank you, it was for everything he'd given her and done for her, and she needed him to know. He just looked at her blankly, before turning on his heel and walking back to the campsite. Elle's heart broke a bit, he still didn't forgive her.

"I think I would love you, Pan," she whispered to herself as his silhouette disappeared into the messy, staggered ring of tents. "You wouldn't listen anyway, would you?" She felt a tiny smile tug at her lips, despite how the words should have been sad.