I tried so hard to finish this over the weekend, but it just didn't happen. The good news is, it's a two-fer.

Bacon. Juliette slowly opened up her eyes and stared at the ceiling above her. She lifted her head from the pillow and sniffed, trying to determine if the aroma of frying meat had been in a dream or was something she was actually smelling. She sat up, shifting the blanket to the side and inhaled one more time to be sure. Definitely bacon. Her heart thudded at the thought of someone breaking into her house, but then she narrowed her eyes.

What kind of intruder fries bacon?

She left the guest room and headed down the hallway, jogging down the stairs and rounding the corner to the kitchen.

Avery stood at the island, whisking a bowl of eggs. The sight of him surprised her so much it took her a second to find her voice. "What are you doing here?" She finally asked.

"Making breakfast," he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Bacon, eggs and French toast casserole. My mother makes one for Christmas every year. It's almost done." He nodded at the coffeemaker in the corner. "Made you some coffee."

"Uh, thank you."

He turned back to the stove, pouring the eggs into a skillet. "Sorry if I startled you. I called on my way over and then I knocked. I didn't want Cadence getting cold out there so I came in."

"Sorry. I didn't put my phone on the charger when I got in. It's probably dead."

"Where'd you come from?" he asked, glancing at her over his shoulder. "I thought you were in our - in the bedroom."

"Upstairs," she answered. "In the guest room up there." She had not been able to sleep in their bedroom since she got home from the treatment center. It took everything in her to walk through the room to put Cadence in her nursery, which was why most times when she had the baby, she would just let her sleep on the couch in the living room.

"That's probably why you didn't hear me at the door."

"I guess so." He didn't ask her why she'd slept up there, but she could tell by the look he gave her that he wanted to say something. "I wasn't expecting you this early."

"Juliette, it's almost 11:00," he said, turning the spatula in his hand.

"Oh." She glanced at the clock. "I must have slept in a little later than I thought."

Cadence whined and Juliette could tell by the tone that it would turn into crying if she didn't get attention. She walked around the couch to where Avery had moved the ottoman and spread a blanket down on the floor. Juliette crouched, putting a hand on Cadence's belly. The baby stopped whining, distracted by her mother's touch. "What happened, Cady Jo? You rolled over on your back and got stuck again, huh? Come here." Cadence whimpered a little more and Juliette picked her daughter up and kissed her cheek. "I know, baby girl. It's so unfair to be able to roll over one way and not the other. You'll get the hang of it soon."

She put the baby down on her stomach, placing a toy within her reach and then she stood, watching Avery's back as he calmly scrambled eggs as if there was nothing out of place about him being there. She felt like pinching herself to make sure it wasn't a dream.

"I'll be right back." She went back upstairs to brush her teeth and hurriedly change out of the pajamas she'd been wearing. She found her phone, which had been lost in a tangle of bed sheets, and plugged it in. When she returned downstairs, Avery was holding their daughter and had a plate set out for her.

"Did she eat?" Juliette poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down at the island. She eyed the food, noticing that he'd poured syrup on her bacon just how she liked it.

"We got up early and she had a bottle so she probably is hungry by now. I've got some applesauce for her." He secured Cadence in her high chair, tied a bib around her neck and then sat so the baby was between them.

She stared at him for a minute, still not understanding what was going on. When he said they'd be over in the morning, she'd assumed that he was going to drop Cadence off for a few hours. She certainly hadn't expected him to fix her breakfast. "So, um, you said your mom makes this for Christmas?"

"Every year," Avery said. His eyes shifted away from hers as he picked up his fork. "It's supposed to sit in the refrigerator overnight, but she said it should be fine if I just threw it together this morning."

He was nervous, she thought, noticing the way he kept turning the fork over in his hand. She cut into the casserole with her fork and took a bite. "Wow," she said. "This is really good." She took another bite, savoring the taste of cinnamon. "I swear your mother is like Martha Stewart's baby sister or something." She said it in an attempt to help him relax and felt relieved when he cracked a smile, however slight.

"She'd probably take that as a compliment."

He offered Cadence a spoonful of applesauce and Juliette watched as their daughter opened her mouth eagerly, looking up at Avery with bright blue eyes. She was already such a daddy's girl, Juliette thought. A pang sounded in her heart when she remembered, once again, the time she'd missed. She lowered her eyes to her plate so Avery wouldn't see the tears forming in her eyes. She had accepted that the PPD hadn't been her fault, but she was still trying to make peace with everything she had lost. That time, the first months of her daughter's life, was gone, and she hadn't been there.

Juliette squeezed her eyes shut, willing her tears away. She took a deep breath before raising her head. He looked at her with none of the usual guardedness she'd seen reflected in his eyes every time he'd interacted with her after she had returned to Nashville. What she saw was a little softer and a lot more unsure.

"You okay?" he asked. The hand that held Cadence's spoon was suspended in the air and their daughter banged on the tray of the high chair as if she were tired of waiting for her food.

Juliette glanced at the baby. "I'm fine," she said. She continued eating and watched as he fed their daughter until finally reaching for the jar of baby food. "Here, let me. Your breakfast is gonna get cold."

He passed her the jar and the spoon and tucked into his food. She alternated between feeding the baby and finishing her eggs.

She hated the awkward silence that stretched between them. It was unwelcome but familiar; the way they'd been when he was still holding her at arm's length before he caught her completely off guard and proposed. At that time, she'd forced herself to accept his decision to be friends and co-parents. Even though it broke her heart that he no longer wanted to be with her, she'd tried to keep things light between them so that they could focus on the child that tied them together. That tactic had worked then to get him to loosen up around her and Juliette thought maybe it would work again. She still didn't understand why he was there, but he was and she didn't want them to be uneasy with each other while they ate the breakfast he'd prepared.

"So," she said. "I'm guessing that the Snuggie was the gift you bought?" He didn't answer but she could see the smile playing at his lips. "How'd you know I'd end up with it?"

"I didn't," he admitted. "But I figured you'd get the joke. You talked about wanting one for days."

She took a sip of coffee and looked at him over the rim of the mug. "You do know that thing is just as ugly as that horrible denim blanket your grandmother made for you, right?"

He laughed. "Leave Gram's blanket alone. I didn't notice you complaining about it when you were lying under it."

"I said it was ugly. I never said it wasn't comfortable." She picked up the jar of baby food and scooped up more applesauce with the spoon. It felt good to share a joke with him. She'd almost thought they'd never be at a place where they could laugh together again.

Cadence banged her tray again and squealed.

"My goodness," Juliette said. "Someone is talkative today. What are you saying, baby girl?" Her daughter looked at her as if she truly had something to say and squealed again, lifting her arms in the air. "Is that right?" she said, and touched the tip of the baby's nose. "Tell us all about it." She glanced at him and was a little taken back by how intensely he was watching her. "What?" she asked, feeding the baby another spoonful of applesauce.

He didn't answer for a long moment. "Nothing."

She offered their daughter more food, but Cadence turned her head. "That's it, Cady Jo? Are you done?" She put the jar of baby food down on the counter, picked up her last piece of bacon and crunched into it. "Thank you for breakfast," she said. "It was delicious."

"You're welcome."

She lifted Cadence from the high chair and took her to the couch to change her diaper while he dealt with the dishes. She didn't know what his plans were, but she assumed that he'd be leaving soon and would probably take Cadence with him. She held her daughter still so she could fasten the new diaper. "Are you heading out now?" she asked.

"I wasn't planning on it," he said from the kitchen. "Do you want me to?"

"No," she answered immediately. "I don't." She'd never wanted him to leave, even when their relationship had been just starting out. She always wanted him to stay with her. That hadn't changed.

He came in from the kitchen and handed her a bottle before sitting on the other side of the couch. She cradled Cadence in the crook of her arm so she could eat. The baby had refused the last of the applesauce, but drank the milk greedily.

Her eyes fluttered closed and Juliette admired her daughter's lashes. Cadence had the most beautiful eyelashes she'd ever seen, teeny dark hairs that were perfectly curved, like gossamer butterfly wings. She wondered if it was strange that she would notice something like that. Surely other mothers stared at their babies and observed the same kinds of things she had, that Cadence had slender, elegant fingers and perfectly shaped toes. She had her father's ears and a birthmark near her shoulder similar to one that Juliette had herself. Her baby smell was sweet and intoxicating and Juliette could hold her for hours and just breathe her in, over and over, in and out.

"Are you working on something?"

Avery's question broke her out of her thoughts and she looked up at him, totally confused. "What?"

"I asked if you were working on something. You were humming that same tune yesterday."

"I didn't even realize I was humming," she said.

"Sounds like it could be a beautiful lullaby."

Cadence had fallen asleep and Juliette took the bottle out of her mouth, watching as her lips pursed and continued sucking for a few seconds. "That's just for her."

"Did she fall asleep?" He asked. He stood, holding his hands out for the baby. "I can lay her down in her crib."

He leaned in close, lifting the baby from her arms and she held her breath and closed her eyes, not wanting to smell him or see him. Her heart yearned for him, but it was torture to be so physically close and yet so emotionally distanced. She heard him move away and opened her eyes to watch as he disappeared around the corner into the hallway. She grabbed one of the throw pillows from the couch and held it, already missing Cadence's warmth and weight in her lap.

He came back a few minutes later and returned to his side of the couch. She looked at him expectantly, wondering what in the world they were going to talk about. They hadn't really discussed anything that wasn't related to their baby since she'd gotten home from the treatment center.

"Tell me something," he said. "How do you know the song we were singing last night? I thought you didn't know any Christmas songs."

"I know them," she said. "I just don't like singing them." She pulled her legs up on the couch, tucking them beneath her. "But to answer your question, a Rayna Jaymes Christmas album." She shook her head, constantly amazed at the ways that woman had impacted her life. "I already told you some of this, but when I was 8, Christmas that year was…it was the worst one of them all. We didn't have anything. I woke up to nothing - no tree, no presents, no food. As a kid…it hurts. Especially knowing I'd have to go back to school and hear everybody bragging about what they did and what they got. The thing that hurt the most was hearing them talk about going to their Mamaw's houses or wherever they went to spend time with their families. I just didn't have that." She squeezed the pillow in her lap, running her hands over the fabric. "I can't even remember if Mama was around or gone off somewhere. The neighbor lady, Miss Carrie, she took me over to her house and fed me dinner. I think it was meatloaf, which you know I despise, but that day it was like cake and ice cream. She didn't have any gifts for me but she gave me Rayna's tape and let me borrow her tape player. I went home and laid on the floor and listened to the whole album. I think she and Deacon had a duet on there. But that song - I just kept listening to it over and over again, thinking about how when I grew up, I'd have a real Christmas with my family." She rolled her eyes. "I couldn't forget the lyrics to that one if I tried. I couldn't believe it when Gunnar suggested that song. But of course…" she let the words trail off but then looked up at him as a thought struck her. "Gunnar's not alone today, is he?"

"No," Avery said. "He texted me a while ago and said something about Scarlett coming over to write with him."

"Really?" Juliette said.

"Yeah, I know." Avery shrugged. "They'll figure it out."

"Hmm."

He cleared his throat. "You know, last night made me think about how lucky I am to have grown up with the family that I have. Gunnar didn't really have much of one, you grew up in a tough situation, Will's dad kicked him out and you met Scarlett's mother. My childhood was probably a lot like those kids you went to school with. We usually went over to Gram's and ate with the family. And it'd be us and all the cousins running around. And when we got back home, mom would make hot chocolate and my dad would help us build a snowman or a fort if there was snow, which was almost always a sure thing in Akron."

She nodded at him, wondering where he was going with his jaunt down memory lane.

"When I was a teenager, they built an ice skating rink downtown and JT and I used to go down there and try to pick up girls." He rolled his eyes.

"That would have been something to see. Teenage you flirting."

"I didn't say we were successful. I just said that's what we used to do."

"Oh, I bet you were plenty successful with those pretty blue eyes." She'd no sooner said the words then she felt her cheeks grow warm. "I've never been ice-skating." she said, trying to cover her embarrassment.

"No?" he raised an eyebrow. His eyes were practically twinkling and she knew he was going to give her a pass on what she'd said.

"Nope. Never built a snowman or did a snow angel or anything. Snow is in short supply in southern Alabama, if you can believe that."

"It's highly overrated," he said.

"You seem to miss it."

"Not really," he said. "Not those heavy snows like that. It gets cold enough for me here. But I do miss those Christmases. Being with family." He glanced up at her. "I was really worried about how Cadence's first Christmas was going to go. I wanted it to be special."

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's - I wanted her to spend it with her parents in her house and she is. She's just sleeping through most of it." He looked at her for a long while, long enough for her to grow a little uncomfortable. "Listen," Avery sat forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. "I realize that I've left you in a limbo about us for a while now. It wasn't my intention to do that, but I really needed some time to figure out how I felt." He paused, fiddling with the ring on his finger. "Anyway, it wasn't fair of me to leave it open ended. We should have talked about this before now."

Juliette nodded slowly, holding her breath as she waited for his next words, knowing it would break her heart into innumerable pieces if he still wanted to pursue the divorce. After telling him that she would agree to do whatever he wanted, she had tried to put it out of her mind.

"Since we met, I wanted to be that handsome prince you were looking for. Every time you came to me with a problem, I wanted to fix it for you. And I couldn't do that this time."

She watched him warily as he looked around the room as if searching for the words. He looked almost as if he were in pain and she was incredibly sorry for that, knowing how much of it she'd caused him, even if it was unintentional.

"For a long time I thought that I would never be able to get over everything that happened. I was so blinded by my hurt that I couldn't see beyond my anger. I hardly slept last night, thinking about how you said you wanted to get better so you could be a better mother and a better person and that is what I want. For you and for Cadence. I'm proud of you for getting the help you needed, Juliette." He paused, rubbing his palms against his jeans. "A few weeks ago you said you'd agree to do whatever I wanted to do. I want to support you in this. You said your recovery is a journey and I want to travel that with you." He clasped his hands together in front of him and looked at her; she could see that his eyes were wet with tears. "I don't want this to destroy our marriage," he said. "I love you, Juliette. You have to know that."

"I do." She nodded and inhaled a ragged breath. "I do know that. But," she bit her lip and shook her head, not even trying to hide her own tears. "I don't want to hurt you again."

"Why would that happen?"

"I don't know," she shrugged. "I feel good today - most days, but what if I relapse or-"

"Then I'll be here." He interrupted, and moved to sit next to her. He covered her hands with one of his and touched her cheek so that she met his eyes. "Then I'll be here," he repeated.

"Promise?" she whispered.

"I promise."

She pulled him in for a hug, inhaling deeply as she buried her face in his neck. "Please don't let go."

"Don't worry, baby." He said, wrapping his arms around her. "I'll hold on. Believe me."