Who wants another Total Drama Everything chapter to come?
I do, because I'm the one writing it.
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Chris' introduction: "Last time on Total Drama Everything, the two teams showed their unique skills in our famous Talent Show. Some of the talent were spectacular. Others weren't. And I need a show lock now to keep Deadpool from messing with my words. After a few words of inspiration from our resident duelist Yusei, Lammy stood up to the plate and shredded to Gun n' Roses. However, ultimate victory went to Yusei and Dante that night. They wowed the crowd with the most amazing motorcycle show ever. The only person who wound up with the bad luck was Maya, who, after a contraband scheme pulled off by Nom Nom's crew, said bye-bye to the island and her hopes. What plan does Nom Nom have next? And who will gain a ticket to Loserville? All those questions and more! On Total! Drama! Everything!"
*theme song*
Ah, the mess hall. A place for eating and much more. It is also a place for conversation, a place for relaxation, and a place…..
"...for getting the rundown on the Ogres," said Nom Nom, "that's what we're in this filthy building for. You need to listen better, Deadpool."
Both Koalas were sitting at their table during breakfast (eggs covered in hair and toenails). Deadpool had been tasked with befriending Julie of the Ogres to gain some extra information on her team. "Why am I doing this?" he whispered.
"Julie's one of the nicer people on this show," Nom Nom explained, "so she'll spill the beans to anyone. Granted, she's smart. So she won't want to give up too much to the opposite team. That's why you need to befriend her. After you kept your mouth shut the other day, I trust you not to reveal anything to her or anyone else besides us. Don't get any ideas, though. She already has a boyfriend, some guy with the best watch around. Befriend her, got it?"
Deadpool nodded to him. "Good, now get to it."
Julie was sitting at the Ogre table, picking at her breakfast and talking with her teammates. "Hello Deadpool," she said when he came up to her, "what's up?"
"DO YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?!"
Silence. Nom Nom facepalmed.
Julie looked back and forth in surprise. "Well," she stated, "we don't exactly know each other. And if this is a shortcut to getting close to me, I have a boyfriend." Everyone started laughing at Deadpool (except Mandy). Nom Nom shook his head and pulled his alliance member back to his table. He shook his head disapprovingly. "That's not how people make friends with others," he seethed, "I may not have friends of my own, being just fine on my own. But you need to talk to her in a simple way. Don't make me regret this." And he shoved him back to the table.
"DO YOU WANT TO HANG OUT?!"
More laughing. Nom Nom sighed. This was going to be hard.
Meanwhile, Mega Man was at the other end of the table with Toph, Double D, and Lammy. They were questioning the robot on his abilities.
"I have an ability that allows me to copy the attributes of any robot I defeat," he explained, "and that's a lot. The catch is I can't have too much in my system or I go insane. Not Deadpool insane, but bloodthirsty insane. So I left many of those powers at home." Everyone nodded. "Also, my programming forbids harming anything innocent."
"That's a large amount of detail for one robot," said Toph, "the closest thing I get to robots at home are automatons."
Chris came in with Chef. "Everyone, meet at the dodgeball court after breakfast for your next challenge. And no, it's not dodgeball."
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"I really wanted to play dodgeball," said Goku, moping.
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The dodgeball court had been renovated into a large stadium. When everyone was inside, they saw rows and rows of seats. In the center was a circle the size of a house. No one knew what was going on.
"What's going on?" Connie asked.
Chris came in through the opposite door. "We're doing something new to the show. Since several of you have unique abilities: flight, weapon skills, etc, we're going to do something called King of The Hill. And no, Deadpool, it doesn't have any relation to the show, so put your hand down."
Deadpool put his hand down. "I thought it was like the show," he said.
Chris rolled his eyes and continued. "I have two buckets in my hand. The gray one contains the names of the Cute Koalas. And the green one has the Green Ogres. Once per round, we're going to pull a name out of both buckets. The two people drawn will stand inside the circle, which we will raise up. After a countdown, it's battle time. The objective is to push your opponent off the pedestal. Best out of 5 round wins. Any questions?"
For once, no one raised their hands. It was on.
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"This should be fun," said Dante.
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"They forgot about Superman," said Nom Nom, "Idiots, all of them."
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Chris drew a name out of the Koala bucket. "Our first Koala is….Snake."
Snake smiled with confidence as he walked into the ring. Everyone turned back to Chris as he drew the next name. "The Ogre fighting is…..Connie."
Connie nodded as she got her sword out. "Finally, I was hoping to use this," she said to her team as she walked towards Snake.
"Ok, raise it up."
The circle began to rise into the air, finally stopping at ten feet above ground. Both opponents nodded to each other.
"I hope you're more of a fighter than you look," said Snake.
"I did have some good teachers," Connie replied.
Chef got the countdown ready. "3…...2…...1…Fight!"
Immediately, Connie lunged with her sword. Snake dodged and pulled out his knife. "Not bad," he said before attacking. Though they were clearly not trying to kill, both were using tactics to send them flying.
"You can do it, Snake," Sam yelled.
Zelda thought of something. "Aren't you worried about injuries?" she asked Chris.
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"Total Drama states that we will compensate in full for any harm that come to said contestants," said Chris.
"I love this job."
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As they were fighting, Deadpool decided to try his luck on befriending Julie again.
"Hi there," he told her, taking a calmer approach.
Julie looked relieved that he wasn't screaming her intentions this time. "Now that's more like it," she said. "Still, note that I already have a boyfriend."
Deadpool nodded. "What do you think of this fighting challenge?"
"I think Chris has become worse," Julie mentioned. "With some people able to-for example-heal from almost anything, he thinks he can abuse everyone however he wants this time around. If only he noticed that it means beating up the rest of us."
"This show stinks sometimes," Deadpool said in agreement.
Julie nodded. "Looks like we agree on something."
Nom Nom noticed the conversation and smiled. This was finally going well.
The fighters were now slashing each other with their blades. Unfortunately for Snake, he figured using his gun would be too risky. Then a lightbulb appeared over his head.
If it's risky to aim at Connie, aim against her.
"That Special Forces team of yours taught you well," Connie told him, "but I was taught by the coolest people around." And she lunged again, but Snake was ready. As she came towards him, he came behind her and fired his gun at her sword. It didn't make a dent in the blade, but the force sent her sword flying out of her hand and off the field. Noticing this, Snake sweeps his leg and kicks Connie to the bottom.
"Don't you know not to bring a sword to a gunfight?" he called from the top.
Chris sounded his horn. "Snake wins the round, and a point goes to the Koalas."
Snake's team congratulated him as he climbed down. Sam gave him a hi-five, and Goku nodded.
Mandy seethed at her sworn enemy's victory, until she notices Connie's sword, having landed next to her (would that be bad or good?). Without hesitation, she grabbed the sword and hid it.
As soon as it was quieted down, Chris got the buckets ready. "The Koala fighting in the second round is…...Nom Nom."
The koala bear seemed quite pleased, and he walked to the circle, which had been lowered again. "Our cute animal is going up against….it's a battle of the captains. Shrek!"
Once Shrek had gotten to the circle and both were risen up, Nom Nom smirked at him.
"Let's see if you have as much brain as you do belly," he said.
Shrek laughed. "Are ya just a cute face or a cunning strategist?"
"3…...2…...1…...Fight!"
Nom Nom started running around in circles, hoping to use Shrek's heft against him. It seemed to be working, as Shrek stumbled every time he tried to hit his opponent. He couldn't seem to land a single hit on him. Everyone watched the battle, with Rarity looking slightly intrigued.
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"He has that adorably cute face for sure," said Rarity. "And a brain to match it. Twilight told me before I came here about how that could be a dangerous combination. Something's not right."
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"I'm surprised you had this tactic in mind," Shrek said to his opponent. "But it's time I make you 'quake' in your boots."
He began to stomp on the air as hard as he could. That started an earthquake, and Nom Nom began bouncing around. He was now unable to move. Finally, Shrek used the opportunity to punch him off the pedestal. The Ogres cheered at this.
"That victory ties the teams at 1-1," Chris announced. "Round 3!"
Two more names came out of the bucket. "Rarity vs. Zelda!"
The ladies made their way to the pedestal and got into their battle positions. Rarity nodded and Zelda bowed.
"Let's hope this becomes a beautiful battle," said Rarity.
"You're going against a Triforce bearer," replied Zelda. "I hope you know that."
"3…...2…...1…...GO!"
Zelda launched Din's Fire at Rarity, who dodged and started zapping at her with her horn. Her strategy was to have Zelda keep avoiding it until she comes to the edge.
Both were shooting left and right, until Zelda noticed Rarity kept herself unguarded when attacking. "I do believe I'm about to win," she told her.
Rarity kept zapping, but Zelda dodged them all and used Farore's Wind to surround herself and teleport behind Rarity. With a final determined look, Zelda shot another fireball and knocked Rarity off to the ground.
"The winner is Zelda," Chris said to everyone. "The Green Ogres are in the lead now."
The Ogres clapped as the platform was lowered. Rarity grumbled as she rejoined her team.
"We're now at Round 4! The Ogres can win it all right here."
Chris drew a name from the Koala bucket.
"The fourth Koala to battle is…..Deadpool!"
Deadpool squeled like a girl as he jumped to the platform. Chris took the Ogre bucket and drew a name. When he read it, he smiled mischievous.
"This is interesting…"
Everyone looked on, curious as to whom Deadpool's opponent would be.
"...Dante!"
The demon hunter heard his name and walked to his opponent, both shocked and calm at the same time.
"This is for you, TheMasterKat," Deadpool whispered.
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"Wait," asked Double D, "a friend of mine loves comic books, and told me about one from Deadpool (I think it's canon) where he gets married to the Queen of the Underworld. If that's true, why is he hitting on this 'TheMasterKat' lady? Is she even real?"
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"The heart wants what it wants," Deadpool sighed.
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"If we don't get Superman vs. Goku," said Toph, "we at least get this."
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"Just like old times," Dante said as the platform was raised. "Am I right?"
Deadpool nodded. "Just like old times." Both drew their swords.
Nom Nom walked up to Shrek. "Five bucks."
"You're on."
"3…...2…...1…...GO!"
The opponents charged after each other. It was officially on.
Dante kicked Deadpool in the face as the latter slashed at Dante. Unfazed by the attacks, they started firing their guns at each other. However, the bullets kept bouncing off of each other, and they soon ran out of ammo. Deadpool dropped his guns and teleported behind Dante. "BAM!"
However, the demon hunter perceived this and kicked Deadpool, accidentally activating the teleportation belt again and sending him to the other side of the field.
"Looks like I'm about to win here," said Dante, smirking. He walked up to Deadpool, sword ready.
Deadpool suddenly had an idea. He grabbed to the side and….wait….did he just grab a sentence from this very chapter?
(The sentence that I italicized(see above)? That's the one. He's about to beat the **** out of Dante with it.)
With his newfound weapon of literature, the mercenary wielded it like a sword and started hitting Dante with it again and again until they were at the edge of the platform. Dante was too surprised to fight back. Holding the sentence like a baseball bat, Deadpool hit a homerun and sent Dante flying over the seats, slamming face first into the wall.
"What the heck?" asked Shrek as he handed Nom Nom five dollars.
Chris got over his shock. "After that…..crazy battle, Deadpool brings us into a tiebreaker. The score's 2-2, so the next battle takes it." With those words, he drew two final names.
"The final matchup is…...Mega Man vs. Superman!"
Both made their way to the platform, but Mega Man looked entirely scared. And neither wanted to do this. Mega Man was programed not to harm people like Superman, and Superman didn't want to harm someone who wasn't evil.
"Final round. Winner takes all. 3…...2…...1…...GO!"
It didn't even last five seconds, because Mega Man jumped off the second the countdown had finished. Superman stared at him as he landed, stunned.
The Koalas stood shocked at this, except for Nom Nom, who was fuming.
"YOU THREW IT?!"
Mega Man just shook his head. "Did the others not tell you? It's in my programming that I can't hurt those with an evil heart."
Nom Nom couldn't believe it. "Programming?!" he exclaimed. "Do any of you believe what he had just said? I sure don't. He's obviously a coward who didn't want to fight. Are you all really going to believe this?"
The entire Koala team went silent except the three people Mega Man had told this to earlier: Toph, Double D, and Lammy. All three were protesting.
"Come on, guys! Mega Man's telling the truth!" exclaimed Toph.
After a while of arguing, Chef used his whistle and quieted everyone.
"One more word, and I'll have you all begging for mercy!"
Chris sighed and got back on track. "After that uneventful final fight, Superman wins the round. That means the Green Ogres win the challenge!" The Ogres all cheered (except for Dante, who was out cold from being whacked by letters).
"Cute Koalas, I'll see you all at the bonfire ceremony. Twice in a row. You guys were doing so well."
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Julie was laughing. "I can't believe it," she was telling Deadpool. "That wasthe funniest thing I've see all day!"
Deadpool was laughing with her. They were still at the stadium. "Believe me, I have a lot of tricks up my sleeve."
"I bet you do," Julie replied. "You're definitely one funny guy Deadpool. You know, for a nutcase."
The mercenary just grinned at that comment. "See you around," Julie told him, and she went back to her cabin. Deadpool ran to his own cabin, where Nom Nom and Mandy were.
"How did it go?" Nom Nom asked him.
Deadpool grinned. "Hook, line, and sinker."
"Keep this up," said Nom Nom, "and the game is ours. And Mega Man will be another victim of it."
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"Not to mention the thorns to my side," said Mandy.
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At the campfire ceremony, Mega Man was the one looking the most nervous. Of course, everyone was nervous.
"After a day of battles and baseball, I see a team that didn't do well enough today. When I call your name, come collect a marshmallow. Whoever doesn't get one has to be shot out of the Cannon of Shame."
"The first marshmallow goes to...Deadpool."
"Double D."
"Goku."
"Toph."
"Sam."
"Snake."
"Lammy."
"And Nom Nom."
As Nom Nom went to pick up his marshmallow, he shot a death glare at Mega Man.
"Mega Man, Rarity, this is the final marshmallow of the night. Mega Man, you cost your team the challenge, but does everyone believe it was your programming? Rarity, you lost your match today. People may think you're useless. But the cannon awaits for one of you."
Mega Man was more nervous than ever, and Rarity was fidgeting.
"The final marshmallow goes to…."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...Rarity."
Rarity sighed in relief as she picked up her treat of safety.
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"I'm not saying Nom Nom was right," said Sam. "However, even if he did stay, he's kind of a threat because he's a robot with various abilities. I may be able to use certain gadgets, but I'm a human."
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"Get out of here, you robot coward," said Rarity.
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Within minutes, Mega Man was loaded into the cannon.
"Hey where did you put the marshmallows from the previous ceremonies?" Goku asked him.
"I put them on the windowsil of the cabin," Mega Man replied. "If you want to have them, go right aHEEEEEAAAADDDDDD!"
The cannon had fired, sending Mega Man into the air.
"That was fun," Chris said to the camera. "Now we need a show lock so Deadpool doesn't steal sentences again."
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Another victim (somewhat) to Nom Nom. This one was Mega Man. If only I had given him a better role in all this.
I paid homage to Marvel vs. Capcom today, as well as an alternative to Deadpool's Fourth Wall Crisis.
Before I sign off, I wish to ask a favor of all of you.
Next chapter, I hope to do the classic fear challenge. However, I don't know the fears of some of the remaining competitors. So I need your help.
I want you to tell me in review or PM about the competitor's worst fears. If you're not sure, you can simply make something up. Whatever I don't find by next chapter, I will make some up for those who lack the information.
Read and review! Until then, TheMasterKat out!