This is it! After this is the merge!
And remember two people will leave this time.
Who will they be? Time to find out!
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Chris' recap: "Last time on Total Drama Everything, things were not looking up for poor Deadpool after the trouble with Julie. Luckily, he pulled himself together to help his team in our glorious cooking challenge, with special judges Heather, Owen, and Lindsay. While both teams produced delicious foods, the ultimate winners were the Cute Koalas, after Nom Nom had Mandy sabotage the Green Ogres' dessert and tossing the blame to poor Shrek. And it was all over for the big guy after that. With twelve people left to compete and two poor souls about to come to the end of their journey, what secrets will be revealed today? Find out right now. On Total. Drama. Everything!"
*theme song*
Goku, Dante, Double D and Julie were watching something going on in the mess hall. That something was Yusei and Lammy. They were sitting down at a table, and in their hands were familiar looking cards. The same type of cards were organized in an interesting set up in front of them.
Remember how Yusei said he would teach Lammy how to duel and Lammy would teach him how to play guitar? In the past few days, Lammy had really begun to get into the card game, though the same could not be said for Yusei's guitar learning. Right now, they were having a regular practice duel (Yusei had made a backup deck in case something like this came up). And it was currently Lammy's turn. She scanned the cards in her hand before grinning.
"Yusei Fudo, prepare your monsters for battle!"
"What could you possibly have planned, little lamb?" Yusei asked, as though he were an army general, though also grinning.
Lammy simply flipped over a purple face down card with a picture of a dark cemetery. "Surely you know this card. Isn't this 'Call of the Haunted'? And doesn't it let me bring back a friend of mine from that little graveyard of mine? So I think I'll bring back that super awesome Celtic Guardian!" She took a card from a small pile and set it on the table. "And he is now about to battle that Speed Warrior of yours!"
However, Yusei started smiling. "Clever," he said, "but you forgot I still have 'Scrap-Iron Scarecrow'! And it's still fresh and ready to deflect an attack!"
Everyone else watched while Lammy huffed in frustration and Yusei drew a card from his own deck to symbolise it was his turn. "I never thought I'd be able to witness Yusei actually dueling someone," whispered Julie. "Even if they can only do table-top. It's as though he's right at home."
That was true. Yusei looked like he was having fun. He finished his turn (which involved Celtic Guardian being destroyed) and said, "Your move."
Lammy took another look at her cards. "I honestly have no idea what to do next," she said.
"It's easy," Yusei responded. "It's a little against the rules, but may I have a quick look at your hand?" The lamb nodded and showed him. "See that equip spell? You can put that on your current monster and boost his power. Oh, and this would allow you to bypass my defenses and attack me directly. In other words, you're really a few moves away from winning."
"Yes," Lammy said, once again smiling. Then she started to laugh evilly. "Cower before my cards as they pick people's defenses one by one! Watch as I pillage your chances! Shatter your decks! And destroy the compet-"
"Trap card."
Yusei moved his monster to Lammy's side. "You've just lost your last 1200 LP."
The crowd clapped. Lammy sighed in defeat. "You're good at this," she said.
"I've done this for most of my life," Yusei explained. "But I can tell you're becoming really good at this. Should I feel worried?" Both laughed. "Now if only I could get better at playing the guitar."
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"When you meet someone like Lammy," said Yusei, "you can't help but feel relaxed around this person. She's one of the nicest people I've ever met. Besides, now I can actually throw down against someone here."
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While this was happening, Nom Nom was watching through the window. "'Now if only I could get better at playing guitar,'" he said, mimicking Yusei. "Him and that stupid lamb."
Mandy, who was also watching, said, "The spies too. And shouldn't we have gotten those three out by now? The merge will be here soon. We may not have another chance."
"We don't have a chance right now," Nom Nom explained. "I'm on the opposite team from Yusei. You're on the opposite team from the spies. If we want to vote them off, we will have to wait for the merge. That way, we can easily vote for who we want out. I will finally play to the fullest of my abilities."
Deadpool was also there, and he responded, "Well it's an idea. But isn't the whole 'get rid of people a little unfair?" He was looking through the window at Julie, and he sighed. "Believe me, there are plenty of unfair things."
"Will you get over it already?" Mandy asked the mercenary. "Your friendship with her is over. She's done with you. Get over it."
"Good thing too," said Nom Nom. "You could've gotten attached to her. You can't date, but I would've been scared if you had become real friends. Now pull yourself together. We certainly don't want you to be filled with regret."
Another sigh. "Too late," Deadpool thought.
Nom Nom looked once more through the window to see Yusei laughing about something Nom Nom didn't know or care about. "As for the spies and the duelist," he told Mandy and Deadpool, "we will wait until after the merge. I want my vote to go against Yusei."
"Chris did say the merge would happen after the next challenge," said Deadpool. "I hope it's a fun one. I wonder what it will be?"
No sooner had he said those words that the intercom came on. "Alrighty competitors! Meet at the beach for your next challenge. And I hope you certainly have nothing to hide!"
"Speak of the devil," Mandy said.
"Maybe now I can get TheMasterKat to fall in love with me,!" Deadpool squealed.
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"Try and deny it," Deadpool exclaimed, "you're in love with me!"
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Everyone arrived at the beach and saw two peanut gallery areas. The one on the left had the Cute Koala symbol on it, and the other one had the symbol of the Green Ogres. Each seat had a small table with a red button.
"Why do I have a feeling this is going to end badly for us all?" Sam asked.
"Because it will," Chris replied, walking into the area as everyone took their seats. Behind him was Chef, who was holding two bigger red buttons.
"As you all know," Chris announced, "this is the final challenge before the merge. After this, the two teams will be officially dissolved. And note that two people will be leaving tonight because of my bet with Chef."
Lammy raised her hand. "You never explained what the bet was."
"Then allow me to explain," Chris continued. "If the Koalas win, I choose the second person to leave. If the Ogres win, Chef chooses the second person to leave. And yes, that unlucky second person can be from the winning team if we so choose."
Everyone gulped.
The host went on with, "And remember that there will be two people returning. The first one's already been decided. The second will be decided by the audience. Both will be revealed next episode."
"You mean chapter?" Deadpool snickered.
Chris shook his head. "Let me continue. As for this EPISODE," he exclaimed in Deadpool's face, "we're doing a challenge I was never able to finish. The Embarrassing Secrets!"
Now everyone groaned. "Suck it up, buttercups!" Chef yelled.
"You're the buttercup!" Dante cried back. Chef stared at him in fury for a long time after that.
"Both of you, shut up," Chris enforced. "We have sixteen interesting facts about all of you. We're going to keep asking these until we're out of secrets. If you're involved with the fact in question, you may press your button. If you press it, you get a point. If you don't, your secret stays hidden but you don't get a point. The team with the highest score wins. Any questions?"
Toph raised her hand. "Does anything else happen if we don't press the button?"
Chris smirked. "I was hoping someone would ask that. Chef, press both those buttons."
Chef did just that.
ZAAAAAAP!
Every single competitor was hit with a low-voltage blast of electricity. When it finally ended, everyone's hair stuck out in various places. Some were a little dazed.
"Look what you did to my fur!" Nom Nom cried out. Sure enough, he looked completely disheveled from the electricity.
"Please don't remind us of Ash and that rat thing," Yusei added. "I've already been scorched once this season."
Chris rolled his eyes and said, "Now that we've gotten that out of the way, time to get started. Koalas, this is your first question."
The Koalas sat up, anxious as to what was about to happen.
"This Koala once kissed someone, thinking it was someone else. This left them very embarrassed afterward. Who is it?"
Most people were looking around, curious as to who it was. However, no one pressed their buttons, and after thirty seconds, Chris nodded to Chef, who pressed the Koala button.
ZAAAAAAP!
"Rarity must be laughing at us right now," Double D stated, trying to brush off his shirt.
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"Sokka did say he was coming when I fell in the water," said Toph. "And the Kyoshi warrior lady beat him to it. Why me?"
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"Next question. Ogres, one of you was once asked to fix something called the 'Rudolph Heitmann'. This was obviously a human that needed to be fixed. But this person didn't realize he was a human until he arrived at the scene, toolbox in hand. Who is it?"
Everyone waited about fifteen seconds for someone to press their button. Finally, someone did. The Ogres turned to see Yusei hit his button.
"For the record," he explained, "it all worked out in the end. I honestly thought Rudolph Heitmann was a loud machine."
"Who talked too much at faculty meetings," Chris added, laughing.
"This is why I hate this show," Yusei muttered.
It was the Koalas turn again. "Koalas, you're up. Which of you keeps stealing my personal stash of rocky road ice cream? Seriously, I really want to know the answer. C'mon, I want my ice cream!"
Snake just huffed in annoyance. 'Fine," he said as he pressed his button. "I love rocky road ice cream. Happy?"
Sam was giggling a little. "Aren't you a little piggy?"
"Oh ha ha," Snake responded in a teasing way.
Mandy glared at the two. They were getting more and more on her nerves every day.
"Well now I know to put a lock on the stash," said Chris. "Although I should've known. You're the only one who could easily get to my stash and get away with it in the first place.
"Let's just continue. Ogres, let's see if one of you can own up to having an irrational fear of professional figure skaters."
Thirty seconds, and no confessed. Finally, ZAAAAAP!
After it was over, Mandy made sure not to look guilty. She kept telling her friends it wasn't a fear. She just didn't trust the way they spin, is all. She had to remember to give Billy and Grim a beating when the season ended. And one for Irwin because she felt like it.
"At least it's over," said Julie.
"Koalas," Chris said to the next team, "which of you has had a really, REALLY bad live-action movie reboot of your franchise?"
Lammy turned to her teammates. "Which of us had movie reboots?"
"Not me," said Deadpool. "My movie rocked. Ryan Reynolds did me proud."
Sam shook her head. "Not me."
Nom Nom also said no. "I wish."
"Time's up," said Chris. ZAAAAAP!
Another round of electricity, and the Koalas looked like a total mess. "I think I know who it is," said Toph (her movie didn't count because she wasn't in it). She turned to Goku.
"My movie was awesome," Goku said in denial. "I don't know what the critics and box-office were thinking."
Nom Nom responded with, "Will you just get one fact in your head, Saiyan? That movie sucked!"
((Author's Note: It did.))
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"Everyone is just jealous," Goku huffed. "Eventually, people will come to see Dragonball: Evolution in all its glory!"
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"Can we get back to the challenge?" Chris asked. "Ogres, who once completed a dare to make out with Nom Nom?"
The koala bear sat up in shock. How did they know that?
Mandy finally pressed her button and shot a death glare at Chris and Nom Nom.
"It was either him or Shrek, ok?"
Everyone nodded in understanding. Shrek would've been shocked to hear that right at that moment. Plus, he had Fiona. And as nice as Shrek had been before leaving, no one wanted to kiss an ogre.
Still, Nom Nom? Gross.
"After that…..interesting confession," Chris announced, "it's the Koalas' turn again. Which one of you was once turned into a mime, and then given a hideous clown outfit afterwards?"
Sam immediately pressed her button, wanting to get it over with. "I've hated mimes ever since," she told her team.
"I would love to see mime makeup on Chef's face," Dante said with a snicker.
"Can't you shut up for one second, pretty boy?" Chef barked.
Dante simply grinned. "Why would I? It would ruin the fun."
"One more word, and you'll wish you were home with mommy."
"Too late. My 'mommy' happens to be dead."
"That doesn't matter."
"Jerk."
"Loudmouth!"
"Army wannabee!"
"Duncan ripoff!"
"BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP SO I CAN FOCUS ON HUMILIATING PEOPLE OR I SO HELP ME, I WILL THROW YOU OFF THE ISLAND!"
Everyone froze at Chris' frustrated yelling. Even Mandy looked a little scared.
"Now that I have everyone's attention," Chris said, slowly calming down, "we can continue. Ogres, who here once said, and I quote, 'I should have been the one to fill your dark soul with LIGHT!'?"
Dante pressed his button then swore more colorfully than anyone had in the entire season. Most of the group covered their ears.
"Ok then," Chris stated. "That was interesting. But we still have a challenge to complete, no matter someone's amazing language. Koalas, which one of you once died from getting your belt caught on a door knob?"
This one was another hesitation question. Finally, as Chef was about to press the electricity button, Lammy pressed your button. Everyone looked at her in surprise. No one, not even Yusei, expected her to confess to whatever secret was hers, even though she had taken a while to press her button.
"Don't ask," Lammy quickly said.
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"I did NOT think I would answer that to be honest," said Lammy.
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Goku laughed and said, "I have two times to your one. And a friend of mine has died at least four times! You're in good company."
"Gee, thanks," Lammy nervously responded. Then she took a side glance at Yusei, who nodded in appreciation. "Not bad," he said.
Nom Nom stared at the lamb for a while after that. To think she could barely even respond way back during the snowball challenge. She had certainly grown stronger since then. Was that something he should worry about? Could Lammy cause trouble for him down the road?
No, no, no! The only reason for her improvement was that duelist goody two shoes, Yusei. Once he was gone, Lammy would surely break. It would be killing two birds with one stone. That was what Nom Nom was supposed to focus on at the moment.
Even Chris looked at Lammy with surprise. "You've certainly changed," he said. "But now is not the time to focus on that. Ogres, you're up."
"Let's hope this question is good," said Nom Nom.
Chris read the card, "Who has yet to get over a rough betrayal from whom they thought was a friend?"
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"And I wasn't disappointed," Nom Nom said with a smile. "It will remind Deadpool of his amazing work."
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And pretty much everyone looked at Julie. "Oh right," she exclaimed. "Turn to the one who's had the well-known friendship troubles. Ugh, fine." She hit her button with a certain frustration. "And please don't mention anything about it to me. I can barely take it right now."
Deadpool hung his head. So Julie still was a little depressed from what happened. To be honest, so was he. Their friendship up to that night was all he had thought about these days. When they met, when they started to become friends, Julie's first offering of kindness during the fear challenge, her taking on Fang the shark to save him, and every moment after that. All the way up to the night Rarity had blown everything. He lost his best friend that night. Why did he have to join Nom Nom's alliance? Deadpool might've become an honest friend of Julie, as well as many other competitors.
He just chose the wrong side.
"There's still a challenge to complete," Chris announced, breaking Deadpool from his thoughts. "And the Koalas are up next. Which Koala had a weird experience with a boomerang that turned him into a sweaty guy who just had to take off his clothes in public?"
Snake noticed Double D muttering under his breath, "Should I? Or should I not? Oh, forget it. It's not like I have anything to lose anyway." And he pressed the button after a few seconds of muttering.
"It also turned Ed into a brainiac writer and Eddy into a mother," Double D pointed out. "So at least I wasn't the only other one to suffer."
"We have certainly learned a lot from these competitors," said Chris. "And still more to learn. Ogres, who once had an impressive criminal record and even once wound up in jail? Legitimate sentence and everything!"
At first, a few people were expecting Dante to press his button. Which is why a lot of people were surprised to see Yusei calmly press his button. Lammy looked up, intrigued and curious.
"The place I grew up in wasn't exactly amazing," Yusei explained. "In fact, things were rough all over what everyone called the Satellite. And I had to do...a few things...to keep my friends safe. Illegal dueling, messing with the cops, even building my runner could've gotten me arrested."
Then he pointed to the yellow marker on his left cheek. "This isn't a regular tattoo. I once tried to settle the score with a friend of mine, and I wound up arrested for entering the main city without permission. So they sent me to jail and marked my face with a criminal marking. It's also designed to track my whereabouts, even though Chris promised I wouldn't be tracked on the show. And believe me, that's the least amazing mark I've ever had." And he finished the backstory by taking a small glance at his right arm.
"Wow," Lammy said. So this guy was a total rebel. Somehow, it made her like him even more.
Nom Nom was a different story. "So the goody two shoes isn't such a goody two shoes after all," he stated. "And I thought you didn't have enough of an edge to make this fun." Both Yusei and Lammy glared at Nom Nom as he said that.
"Now that we have story time out of the way," Chris announced, "it's the Koalas' turn. Koalas, which one of you has terminal cancer?"
Deadpool took a big breath. "Might as well," he said. And he pressed his button. "The whole cancer thing is why I have this healing factor. I'm technically still sick, but I can't die from the cancer. There are, though, side effects I don't want to get into."
Snake was impressed. There was certainly a side of Deadpool no one had ever known about. And maybe the healing factor was why this mercenary was so insane. What was he like before the cancer?
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"Now I know Deadpool's sick in more ways than one," said Mandy.
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Chris continued with, "Well, add that to the list of things we've learned. But now it's the Ogres' time to shine. Which Ogre is the only one out of their group of friends who doesn't have powers whatsoever?"
"Now you get to the obvious one?" Julie yelled, repeatedly hammering her button. "I really hate this challenge. Who else hates this challenge?"
Only Chris and Chef didn't raise their hands.
"That's what I thought."
"Then be glad this challenge is at the home stretch," Chris responded with clear agitation. "Koalas, this is your final question. Who once tried to become more popular, and it ended up with him in a vat of cotton candy?"
No one answered. ZAAAAAAAP!
"My fur is completely ruined because of this stupid electricity!" Nom Nom cried, while at the same time remembering the cotton candy. That certainly wasn't his best day.
Chris simply laughed at Nom Nom's comment. "Well I'm sorry, Cutest Bear on the Internet," he chuckled. "We don't give Internet celebrities special treatment."
"You should. They basically outrank you both," said Dante. "Well, Chef at least."
"THAT'S IT!"
And he repeatedly hit the electricity button on the Ogres side. So all four Ogres got hit with wave after wave of electricity. Eventually, he slammed it so hard that it broke.
And the Ogres all looked like they've gone through the mill. Everyone's hair was messed up completely. And Mandy was covered in black soot.
"Since it's broken," Chris said, "I'll just say time's up if no one presses the button. Ogres, who had a super weird reboot?"
Chef noticed Dante about to press his button, but he punched him in the face before that could happen. "Sorry," Chef barked, "but you've gone on my last nerves."
"I guess that means it's all over," said Chris. "And with a score of 6-5, the winner of this challenge is….the Green Ogres!"
All four Ogres cheered at this. "Fantastic!" Julie yelled.
"Looks like I win the bet," Chef told Chris. "I choose the second person."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Chris passively muttered. "Cute Koalas, you'll have to vote to see who will go home. And Ogres, don't celebrate just yet. One of you could go home if Chef decides so."
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"Well it comes down to two things tonight," stated Double D. "Who actually revealed their secret, and who's a major threat."
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"So our victory was just for bragging rights," said Dante. "Well I wonder who Chef will pick as the second one to go."
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"I do believe I will probably be safe," said Sam.
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"So you were once a jailbird?" Lammy asked Yusei. "Yep," the duelist replied.
Despite what Lammy had learned today, her liking for Yusei hadn't gone down one bit. On the contrary, it seemed to have gotten bigger.
"I wonder how well you look in black and white stripes."
"We didn't wear black and white stripes."
"Oh."
After a moment, Lammy asked, "Want to have another duel?"
"You're speaking my language."
"I go first! Called it!"
"Darn you, Lammy!"
And Yusei only said that with a laugh.
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"Jail has nothing on that guy," said Lammy.
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Sam, Toph and Snake were seated outside their cabin. "Who should we vote off?" Sam asked.
"There are three people who didn't admit to any of the secrets," Snake replied. "Toph, Nom Nom, and Goku. However, Toph's in our alliance. And with only Yusei on the Ogres and the rest of us on the Koalas, you should be safe Toph. That leaves Nom Nom and Goku."
"This is our chance," Toph stated. "Our chance to get rid of Nom Nom."
The spies nodded. "True," Snake said. "However, we have to consider two things. One, as skillful as Nom Nom is, Goku is a physical powerhouse. And two, Chef will choose a second person to be eliminated. We could see if he chooses right."
"I wouldn't really take any chances," Sam added. "It's too risky right now to take chances."
"We have to consider," Snake pointed out, "that we can easily overpower Nom Nom in physical challenges. We can't do the same with Goku."
After several minutes of talking with both girls, they finally had an agreement. "Toph, let Lammy know," said Snake.
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"I guess it's time to end this for one person," said Chris at the bonfire ceremony. "And then another person. Time for the marshmallows.
"Double D."
"Snake."
"Deadpool."
"Sam."
"Lammy."
"And Toph."
That left Nom Nom and Goku. Neither showed any real fear.
"Nom Nom is here for the on-teenth time, and Goku has a new experience. Neither of you admitted to any of your secrets today. And you're both major threats, though for different reasons. And for the record, that Dragonball movie does, indeed, suck."
"Exactly," Nom Nom griped. "And he didn't admit to that. That's why I should have that marshmallow."
Chris rolled his eyes. "I'm not a fan of impatience, but you've ruined the dramatic silence. So here you go and enjoy." He threw the marshmallow at Nom Nom, who ate it gloatingly in front of Goku.
"I don't know what's more of a bummer," said Goku. "That I just got eliminated, or I won't be able to enjoy eating a delicious marshmallow tonight. Wait, definitely the marshmallow. But can I at least fly away and not take the cannon?"
"Sure, why not?"
"Yay!"
Then Chef walked in with the Ogres. "It's time I take my pick which of you maggots joins the Saiyan!"
Dante scoffed and said, "I wonder who's he's going to pick? I hope his choice is good."
*five minutes later (in classic Spongebob format)*
"WHAT THE ****ING HECK?!" Dante burst out. He was now in the cannon. You can all guess now who was picked. And Chef got a new skip in his step.
"YOU ELIMINATED ME?! YOU CHEATED ME OUT OF A MILLION DOLLARS?! YOU *reaaaaaaaly long sensor*!"
Chef smirked. "Music to my ears," he mused.
"MARK MY WORDS, CHEF! YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THHHHHHHIIIIISSSSSS!"
That "this" was drawn out because he was shot out at that moment (Chef hit the button).
"I''ve gotta see where this ends," Goku said. And he flew away in Dante's direction.
Chris gathered the remaining ten competitors. "You know what this means," he told the group. "You have all officially made it to the merge. As of now, the Cute Koalas and the Green Ogres are no more. It's every man or woman for themselves from here on out. Everyone, go make your post-merge confessionals."
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"I did not expect to make it to the merge," Double D said, sheepishly. "Now that I have, I expect things to get more complicated. I'll do what I can, Ed and Eddy."
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"Time to bring in the big guns," stated Nom Nom. "Actually, I think my alliance is the first in TD history to have all of its members make it this far. And I'm positive my alliance is the only existing one right now. And finally time to, shall I say, 'attack Yusei directly'."
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"I guess it's time I win this thing," said Julie.
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"Chimichanga, chimichanga, chimichanga," Deadpool kept saying repeatedly.
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"Two returnees to come back, plus nine people left besides me," Mandy pointed out. "Eleven people for me to power through. Shouldn't be a problem. And if I'm lucky, the spies will go first."
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"Snake and I made it," said Sam with satisfaction. "Hopefully, we can have some good, friendly competition."
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"It would seem blindness is, once again, no obstacle," said Toph. "Nom Nom and his crew are in way over their heads."
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"I knew Sam and I would make it," said Snake. "We're great together, and we work great together. We'll overcome any obstacle."
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"I actually made it this far," Lammy stated. "I never thought I would. And I owe my progress to Yusei. Though I don't think he's interested in me or anything."
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"I like Lammy!" Yusei exclaimed. "I might as well blurt it out. She's nice, she's smart, and I finally have someone to duel against here. I hope everyone back home sees her the way I see her. And if any of you back home asks, yes. She's an actual lamb. And I am certainly happy to make it this far."
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Chris and Chef were in their video tent. "Our first returnee is ready to speak with you," said Chef.
"Good," Chris said. "Put her on videochat."
The screens came on. "Are you ready?" Chris asked.
"I am," said a tall girl with hair of bubblegum pink. In fact, bubblegum was all she was made out of.
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We've made it this far in the story! Excellent!
The Koalas have voted out Goku, and Chef used his grand opportunity to kick off Dante. I don't know if any of you expected those two to leave.
And we got some backstories on a few of the competitors, along with the official reveal. Princess Bubblegum is coming back to the show. Who will join her?
That's where you all come in. I will be putting up a poll on the other thirteen competitors who have been eliminated. The highest voted will come back to the show.
And with the merge finally here, things are about to get fun.
(Suddenly, Dante crashes in through the ceiling.)
Dante: THAT ****ING CHEF IS GOING TO PAY DEARLY AND…..
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
Dante: I guess I say it? Fine. TheMasterKat out! *continues swearing*