File: Jasper Jordan and Monty Green
Names: Jasper ? Jordan and Monty 'I'm Green for a Reason' Green
Ages: Twenty One (Jordan) Twenty One (Green)
Height: "Tall enough"
Status: Paired at the hip. I can't separate these two if I locked them in different rooms. Gay?
Jasper: We are most definitely gay.
Monty: Jasper, I have a girlfriend.
Jasper: Harper doesn't count.
Monty: We are not gay.
Jasper: We're not happy? How sad.
Monty: Why are we here?
Jasper: Because some entity in the sky created us to live on this planet in harmony with each other, but you see how well that's working out?
Monty: No, I mean here, in this conference room.
Jasper: Mr. Dad wants us to explain how we got into the Family.
Monty: Okay, but why is 'family' capitalized? Like, why? Is it... an important 'f'? Or is it like... Mr. Dad is the 'F' and the rest of is are the other letters and we're not as important as Mr. Dad?
(Offscreen: "How high are you right now, Monty?")
Monty: *laughing* There's no ceiling in here.
Jasper: Great job, Monty. Coming to the interview high. You have no professionalism. I, however, am totally drunk right now.
(Note: I can't do anything with these idiots.)
Jasper: We're not idiots.
Monty: Yeah.
Jasper: Just Monty is.
Monty: Hey, who's the one that went to college and got a degree in engineering and who's the one who sits on his ass all day drinking and smoking weed?
Jasper: We got into the Family because of Clarke I think. She likes to run away sometimes and she met us. In an alleyway where we used to live.
(Offscreen: "Used to?")
Monty: I think he meant in the houses we used to live in. Our moms... were, like, dead and our fathers sucked.
Jasper: Literally. *snickers and begins crying*
Monty: Dammit Mr. Dad, you made him sad. It's okay, Jasper.
(Offscreen: "Maybe I'll talk to you guys later.")
(Camera turns off.)