"This is the way it had to go down and you know it"
The words he spoke to Daniel rung in Jack's head as he recalled the less than amicable terms upon which he resolved the team's encounter with Reese. Those words now felt horribly cold upon greater reflection and Jack couldn't help but feel guilty.
The possibility of finishing the report seemed ever-fading as he could not shake the memory of the anguished look on Daniel's face.
"You stupid son of a bitch"
Daniel's words to Jack had little weight as it was in his expression that Jack knew just how Daniel really felt. That expression was one he recognized. Guilt. Daniel was always the one to burden himself with giving others promises which would prove difficult to keep and thus took the greatest hit when things didn't pan out. The feeling of responsibility he felt towards others was one of his most admirable traits, but it was in many ways his greatest flaw.
"Of course I had to do it", Jack thought to himself.
He recalled his moments on Reese's home planet. While he knew himself to be a hardened soldier and no stranger to death and destruction, the sight of an entire civilization laying in ruin had even caught him off guard. When he saw Reese this was all he saw paired with images of Earth suffering the same awful fate. After all it was "Once an advanced civilization" in the words of Carter and if his time in SG-1 had taught him anything, it was that human civilization was fragile.
The pieces of metal found on the planet reeked of Replicator presence and his past experiences with the mindless machines made clear to him their intent on devouring anything and everything. The fragile earth could never stand a chance against the likes of them. Reese's status as a machine did not bode well in gaining his trust and the discovery that she may have created the replicators only solidified his mistrust.
But of course Daniel didn't believe that. Or at least he didn't share the same perspective; that she was just a machine.
He remembered Daniel's concern for Reese when they had initially met and his insistence to both him and Carter on treating her as something more than a machine. While he laid it out in pragmatic terms Jack knew part of his motivation was that he truly harbored some sympathy for the machine. After all, it's who he is.
Frustrated, Jack switches off his lamp and leaves his quarters to head to the mess hall.
As soon as he entered, his eyes fell on Daniel, his hands propping up his head and his eyes visibly worn. He looked to be in deep thought. The subject of his thoughts was of no mystery to Jack.
Jack looked at his watch
3:35 AM
"Here goes nothing" Jack thinks to himself strolling in nonchalantly and grabbing the first bottle he found fully aware that Daniel was watching him.
Buying himself sometime to think about how to break the silence, he opens the bottle and starts to chug his drink while his gaze slowly edges toward the place where Daniel was sitting.
"Jack"
Startled, Jack chokes on his drink.
After a few seconds of sputtering and coughing, Jack looks back at Daniel sheepishly.
"Oh good – I was afraid I'd have to drink the whole bottle before the awkward silence broke", said Jack.
Jack looks back with a faint smile.
"You're thinking about the girl"
"Well that's unexpected. I didn't think I'd hear you call her something other than a machine", responds Daniel.
"Well I've been thinking a little more about what happened"
"A little?" says Daniel looking at his watch and raising an eyebrow.
"Okay so maybe more than a little, but I can tell its bothering you and that's what's bothering me"
"I appreciate the concern, but I'm figuring it out" replied Daniel looking away.
"Look we're all at fault for not figuring out how to end this on better terms"
Daniel looks up at Jack. "But I'm the one who promised to protect her – to be her friend" said Daniel clenching his fists.
Jack smiled. "And you did all those things. You never broke your promise and I can tell you with confidence she feels the same way. You said it yourself, she shut down the replicators of her own will – that's all thanks to you"
Jack continued "As much as it annoys me sometimes, I've learned to appreciate your compassion and your sense of responsibility, but you have to understand that just as our successes as a team belong to all of us, our failures too…belong to all of us. We're responsible for each other - it's what we do."
Daniel looked back at Jack with a slight smile
"You're right…I know you are, but I still need time" said Daniel with an apprehensive look.
"Of course you do, just don't ignore the rest of us – we're here for you regardless of your concern with burdening us with your problems. The fact is you burden us just by existing in our lives - we all do it to each other since we can't escape the fact that our issues affect those around us. So keep that in mind next time you want to run away"
"I won't run…I promise" said Daniel looking reassured.
It wouldn't be easy but surely the two men would be able to close the rift between them created by their conflicting yet complementary personalities. While this won't be the last case in which they have strong disagreements it marks a new chapter of understanding between them and bodes well for their future as comrades and as best friends.
