CHAPTER 26

FOUR POV

Tris stands with her back to the target. The group has gathered round to watch. Zeke is standing next to me, I 'm sure he is there to try and give me strength. To make sure I don't screw this up. I look around the group and then my eyes find Peter. He is standing there with a smirk on his face, thinking he has won, that he has found a way to torment Tris even more than I know he already does. He may think he is smart but he isn't. I will do this and then I will make it my mission to make sure that he doesn't become a Dauntless member. I don't know how, but I am going to find a way.

"Ready?" I ask Tris. She nods her head. "Don't move okay?" I don't know if I'm saying okay to Tris or I'm trying to reassure myself. My chest feels tight, I am tempted to take a few more shots of alcohol but that wouldn't be wise. I need to get this right, cause the least amount of damage to Tris and throw suspicion away from my feelings for her.

I pass the knife from my left hand to my right, as I always do. I inhale then I exhale and the knife has left my sweaty fingers. The knife has landed an inch from Tris' right knee. I can hear the people around me breathe again. Only three more to go I think.

I start the process again. Passing the knife from my left to my right hand. Inhale, exhale and once again the knife is gone. It has landed an inch from her left cheek. Tris hasn't moved, I wonder if she is even breathing at the moment. I look into her eyes and I am sure she trusts me, if only she knew what I know I have to do. But first I need to release this third knife. The knife lands just above her head right where the part is in her hair.

One to go. I look at Zeke hoping he will tell me I don't need to do this but no, it is the opposite. "C'mon man, you can do this. It will be okay," he whispers to me. I am concentrating harder than I ever thought I possibly could. I have to wipe the fear from my mind, stop listening to my beating heart as it is racing ready to burst out of my tight chest at any moment.

I ignore my sweating palms; I am staring at the cartilage on the tip of her ear. I inhale then exhale and I let the knife go. Although it is over in less than a second with minimal damage to Tris physically, the emotional damage to me could have lasting ramifications. Did I just blow any chance with her? Does this negate the beautiful kiss we shared just a moment ago.

I look at Tris and I can see the burning anger in her eyes, she has clenched fists and I am waiting for the barrage of insults that should be coming my way any moment. Zeke runs up to Tris, "girl you were awesome!" He then whispers to her, "I know you're pissed but you need to pick someone to give a dare too. Do that, then have words with my boy over there."

Tris looks at Zeke and I can see that he is going to be the first to have to deal with her wrath. "Ok Zeke," she says loudly. "I dare you to let Christina dress you up in women's clothing and you walk down the streets of Abnegation."

Christina lets out a squeal of joy. Seems she doesn't mind who she is making over, she is going to enjoy this. "Ok we will meet at the train tracks in fifteen minutes," Zeke says. Christina laughs and says, "Make it thirty I need time to work. Girls come and help me. This is going to be so much fun."

Everyone starts to walk out of the training room, either making their way to the train tracks or they are following Zeke and Christina to help with the makeover. Tris hasn't moved she is still standing in front of the target. As soon as everyone has left the room she walks over to where I am standing. I haven't been able to move. All I want to do is take her in my arms and say I'm sorry but I'm frightened if I move I will throw up. I feel sick to the stomach. How do I ever explain to her why I did it? Without me sounding like a complete fool.

"You did that on purpose!" she shouts.

"Yes, I did," I say. Barely louder than a whisper. Having to have to admit what I just did is repulsive to me. "You should be thanking me for it," I say with a little more confidence in my voice.

"Thanking you! Thanking you are you insane?" she says. As she raises her hand to slap me I grab her wrist and pull her to me. There are so many emotions coursing through my body at this moment and the only thing I can do to stop them is to kiss her. Not the soft first kiss that I gave her before but this kiss is all passion and fire. It is full of hunger and desire but instead of her putting her arms around me like before she pushes me away. And starts to run toward the door.

"Tris! Tris!" I call after her. She turns and yells, "I hate you Four Johnson."

"That's great Tris. How well did that work out for the last guy you said that too?" I know I have stepped over the line here. I know that there is no turning back. I am angry with her, I am angry with me. I should never have nicked her ear; I shouldn't have listened to Zeke. I should have just said be damned with who knows I like her. It's nobody's business but ours anyway. But no I took the easy way out and now I have cut her down even further with this comment.

She stops dead in her tracks. She turns and stares at me. I may as well be that nine year old boy she said those same words to so long ago now. Because I feel like him. I feel even more defeated than I did that day. I see the tears in her eyes as she turns back and runs out the door. I scream in frustration and kick the table the knives had been on. I slump down to the floor and I sit there with my head between my knees.

I can't change what I have done. I can't take back the words that have come out of my mouth. But I can at least try to make amends for my stupid actions and words. I sit there thinking, trying to work out what I can do to make this right when someone taps me on the shoulder. I look up and Shauna is standing there.

"Come on Four, you can't do this to yourself," she says. She doesn't know the half of what has just transpired between Tris and me. "Zeke is almost ready we need to get to the tracks. You can work everything out with Tris later. I swear when you see Zeke it will make you feel a little bit better."

Hopefully Tris has gone to the tracks and I can try to talk to her there. I get myself off the ground and give Shauna a hug. "Thank you," I say. "Always Four, your family to me. We will help you get her back I promise."

I get to the track but I can't see Tris. Did I really think she would be here? If I answer honestly then no. Do I wish she was her? Yes. I walk over to our group with Shauna and notice that Zeke, Christina and Marlene are also missing. That's when I hear Uriah wolf whistle and start laughing. I turn my head and I see Zeke attempting to walk in a pair of five inch heels. How he will get on the train is probably something he hasn't thought of yet. Zeke is in a really short skirt. We are all really lucky that he isn't the tallest of guys or he would be showing a lot more than anyone needs to see. He has a V-neck sleeveless top on and we can all see his belly button. The top is so tight on him that the material looks as though it could snap at any moment.

We have got ourselves in some trouble over the years with our dares but this is definitely going to go down as one of the best. I will have to remember to go to the control room tomorrow and print off a few shots of this moment. We are all laughing and for a brief moment it has given me a chance to think without Tris clouding my every thought.

Shauna goes up to Zeke and gives him a quick kiss. "Hey you will wipe all my lipstick off," says Zeke. Which only brings howls of laughter from all of us. I can see the train approaching. "You might want to take your shoes off for this Zeke," I say. He looks down to his shoes, I'm sure he will be buying Christina a new outfit along with matching shoes sometime soon as these are never going to be worn by her again. He will probably want the clothes to stash in his dare bag that he keeps. The amount of things he has collected over the years for our games of dare is amazing.

We all jump on the train. I have jumped into the last carriage by myself. Not wanting to have to deal with the happiness of my friends at the moment. I stick my head out of the carriage door and as I look back towards the compound and I see her. She is running to catch up to the train. As she goes to jump on I pull her up and into the train car.

She stands there and we are just staring into each other's eyes. "I'm sorry," I say. I want to say so much more. I have so much more to say but I still haven't worked out how I am going to tell her. How do I tell her that her Tobias is still alive? If nicking her ear has caused this much anger what is she going to be like when she learns the truth.

"I'm sorry too," she says.

"I never meant to hurt you, I mean I did but not for the reason you're probably thinking," I say.

"I think I understand, I'm not happy about it but I know it was for my own safety," she says. "I went and talked to Zeke while he was getting his makeover and he explained it too me. I'm really glad I gave him this dare now."

We both laugh at this. "So are we okay?" I ask. I can hear the pleading in my voice. She nods. "I would hug you now but I don't think we need to put on any more of a show tonight," I say. Nodding my head towards the people in the next carriage. Everyone is watching our interaction, especially Peter who has a scowl on his face. I really need to find a way to kick him out of Dauntless.

I can feel the tension has partially lifted from my shoulders. There is still so much that needs to be said, I think I'll give mum a visit tomorrow. She is really good with this sort of stuff. Even if she doesn't tell me what to do, it is good that I can just go and talk it all out. Maybe she will have an idea on how to tell Tris to truth.

We jump off the train at the edge of the Abnegation section and it is only now that I realise exactly where I am. There has been so much drama tonight that I didn't think of how being here would affect me. I haven't been here in nine years, half a life time ago. I can't move I feel like my feet are made of lead. "I'll wait here for you guys," I say.

"Is everything alright Four?" Tris asks.

"I'm fine Tris, I just shouldn't be seen here," I say. She looks at me puzzled. "I'm a leader Tris; if I get caught in the middle of this dare it could cause Dauntless a lot of trouble." It wouldn't matter if I did get caught there are no rules that say I can't be here. It is my fear of him that is holding me back. She nods her head. "Do you want me to stay with you?" she asks. I shake my head, "no go and enjoy the dare you gave him."

I can hear a lot of laughter and in the distance I can see Zeke strutting his stuff as he walks down the street. The amount of noise they are making should have the occupants of Abnegation awake any minute. As I am thinking this I start to see lights being turned on and curtains moved in windows. "Come on guys hurry up," I yell to the group. We really don't need any trouble. I also know that Abnegation do not like people using electricity at night if possible, so this should upset a few people. Although they would never complain about it.

The group is starting to walk back towards the train tracks when I see the Dauntless patrol car pull up. Shit now we are in trouble. I forget my fear and start to walk over to where the officers have gotten out of the car. "Should have known it was you Zeke," says the first officer. He is smiling so hopefully this will end well. "I'm sorry Zeke but we are going to have to take you back to Dauntless." I walk up to the group and say, "is this really necessary?"

"Sorry Four but yeah we need to take him back with us. It's protocol. When we get back you can sign him straight out and because you're a leader we can let him go with a warning," Officer number two says. "You guys get the train back and I will go with Zeke and get this sorted. Initiates go back to the dorms get some rest we have fights in the morning," I say.

"Wait," says Zeke. "Uriah come here for a minute."

Uriah walks over to Zeke and he hands him something. I couldn't see what he gave him but then he whispers something in his ear and Uriah starts laughing. "No problem bro," Uriah says.

We get into the patrol car and I say, "what did you say to Uriah?"

"Just gave him the best dare ever. And I mean ever," Zeke says.

"Are you going to let me in on this best dare ever?"

"No way you can wait and see it for yourself tomorrow," he says with a wicked grin on his face. I just shake my head. What could possibly be the best dare ever? We have done some amazing dares over the years.