CHAPTER 28

JEANINE POV

"Caleb have we been able to get into the Dauntless secure files yet?" I ask. I am starting to get irritated with this situation. It has been over a week and no one in Erudite has been able to get me the information I need.

"No Jeanine. We think they have taken the files off their server."

This is not what I want to hear. I have no other way to get the information I need. Jack Kang has always had secret files at Candor but we learnt a long time ago that you can't access them. Maybe I should put him under his own truth serum, and then I could find out everything I need to know and more. I will have to keep that idea for later.

Caleb has proven to be a bigger asset than I thought he ever would. He isn't as smart as his father, which is a benefit. It has been so much easier to manipulate the truth with him. His father was always too moral for my liking. How he could leave Erudite and run off with Natalie to Abnegation still makes me sick. But now I can have my revenge, I have his son right where I want him.

I have to come up with a new plan. I don't even know if Marcus is delusional or if there is any truth to what he was saying about Tobias. I think it's time I take this to a whole new level. There must be someone out there who would like to speak about what happened. It may have been nine years ago but no one has ever forgotten what happened.

"Caleb I need to talk to the editor of the newspaper. Set up a meeting for today?"

TRIS POV

I walk into the dorm room to find a group of initiates standing around Peter, who is holding a newspaper. He sees me and starts to read:

"The mass exodus of the children of Abnegation leaders cannot be ignored or attributed to coincidence. The recent transfer of Beatrice and Caleb Prior and Robert Black calls into the question the soundness of Abnegation's values and teachings. Why else would the children of such important men decide that the lifestyle that has been set out for them not be an admirable one?"

"Or are there more sinister revelations to be had? Everyone remembers the horrific murders of both Evelyn and Tobias Eaton nine years ago. It has recently come to our attention that this may not be true. What is Abnegation trying to cover up? Is Tobias Eaton still alive? Why else would there be so many defections? Do the children of our leaders hold the answers to this question and many more? How far does the corruption spread?

"Is it time to for a new government? A new system that can help lead us into prosperity and away from the poverty the city has been enduring for so many years under Abnegation."

I can't believe what I am hearing. Tobias alive? That can't be true; I watched them carry his body away. How could this be happening? I'm supposed to be trying to start a new life, with friends and freedom that I could never have before. This was supposed to lessen my guilt, my pain. I'm broken from my thoughts with Molly asking me a question.

"Is it true Stiff? Is Tobias Eaton alive? Tell everyone the truth. Are abnegation deceitful liars?"

I am so angry. I want to tear shreds from her back. I am about to launch myself at her when Christina and Will grab my arms. "Leave her, she wants this reaction," Will whispers into my ear as they drag me out of the room with Molly, Peter and Drew laughing at me as we leave.

FOUR POV

I'm standing in the training room waiting for everyone to arrive. Last day of fights today. Then the initiates get a few days off. Tris has walked in with Will and Christina standing extremely close to her. It looks like both have a hand on her arms, it's not a friendly gesture like when someone has their arm linked with yours, and it looks like they are trying to hold her in place. Strange.

But then I see the look in her eyes. Tris has a fire I haven't seen before in her eyes. Not her usual alertness but an anger. I have no idea what is going on here, I will have to try and find out what this is all about. I need to get these fights underway, and then I can find out what is going on.

I turn the board around so they can all see who they are fighting today. I'm looking at Tris hoping that she can handle Molly in their fight. She has been improving but she still has a long way to go before she is a great fighter. As Tris looks at the board I see a small smile come across her face as she says something to Christina. Whatever she has said has been enough for Christina to let go of Tris's arm. Obviously Molly has something to do with what has been happening with Tris this morning.

The fights have started. Will and Myra have me yawning I am so bored. I don't expect much better from the next fight. Christina is sure to wipe the floor with Al. I still don't understand why he came to Dauntless; he is never going to fit in. Even if he was competent he doesn't have the personality. I almost feel sorry for the guy. He will be an asset in the retirement home though. He is large so he will be good for the manual labour needed. He may be a little gentle for the hard-ass Dauntless living there though.

Peter and Edward have finally started, when my dad walks in. This can't be good; he doesn't usually come into the training room while the initiates are here. He stands with me and watches the fight. It's time for Tris and Molly. They get into the ring and then my attention is taken from the fight as dad holds up a piece of paper.

As I read the paper I think I'm going to be sick. "How does she know?" I ask dad.

"Marcus I'm sure," Max says. Then it dawns on me. This is why Tris was upset this morning, she has seen this report.

"We are going to have to do something about this Four."

I knew this day was coming, ever since my Choosing Ceremony two years ago. "It's going to have to be me dad. I need to do something about it," I say.

I'm broken from my conversation with Christina and Will yelling my name. I look over to see Tris kicking the crap out of an already unconscious Molly. I run into the ring and grab her arms and pull her away from the badly beaten Molly. She tries to pull away from me and I grab her around the waist and turn her away from Molly so she can't inflict any more damage.

"Peter, Drew take Molly to the infirmary," I instruct. "Everyone you have three days off until stage two starts. I will post the rankings tomorrow night. Dismissed."

Tris tries to move and I say, "not you. We need to talk."

"Four we will talk later," dad says. I nod my head and watch as he walks out of the training room.

I let go of Tris and grab her hand. "Come on," I say while I pull her out of the training room.

"Where are we going?" she asks.

"First, we are going to go and get you some clothes. Then you are coming back to my place for a shower. Then I have something I want to show you," I say.

"Four I'm not really in the mood for this."

"I know, I saw the report. But wouldn't you like to shower in private for a change?" I say. I'm hoping a hot shower will calm her down. I have no idea what she is feeling right now. Between the revelations I might be alive and the adrenaline going through her from the fights. I am sure she is a mix of emotions. Plus I really would like to know how she is feeling about me, Tobias me not Four me.

I still don't know how to tell her that I am alive. I know I don't have to tell her ever. But if it ever did get out then she would hate me forever for not telling her. She could also hate me forever anyway. I'd rather she hate me for being truthful with her, no that isn't entirely true. I just hope she doesn't hate me at all.

I'm sitting in my apartment waiting for Tris to finish in the shower when there is a knock at my door. I open the door and Charlie is standing there.

"Four!" she yells and jumps into my arms.

"Charlie." I give her a big hug. "What are you doing here?"

"I missed you, I wanted to say hi."

Just then Tris walks into the room. "Tris," Charlie says. She wriggles out of my arms and goes and gives Tris a big hug.

"Hi Charlie," says Tris.

"Four why is Tris here?"

"What?" I ask. A little confused at the question.

"You never have pretty girls at your place," Charlie says. Tris tries not to giggle and I have gone bright red. Could I be any more embarrassed right now? I don't think so.

"You ready?" I say to Tris. Trying to get out of this as quickly as possible. Tris gives me a nod.

"ready for what?"

"That's none of your business," I say to Charlie.

"Are you going on a date?" asks Charlie. Okay this is getting embarrassing again.

"Charlie," I say. Wishing that a nine year old would understand that I am trying to tell her to shut up without actually having to tell her too.

"I don't want to go on a date with you I'm going over to Jakes to play," Charlie says.

"Have you got a boyfriend Charlie?" asks Tris.

"NO! Ewww that would be gross," she says. Tris and I both laugh.

I walk over to Tris and hold out my hand to her and pull her toward the door with Charlie following.

"I'm going to tell Zeke you were holding hands," Charlie says. And then she runs out of the apartment before I can grab her. I just shake my head. If only I could find a way to keep Charlie and Zeke apart for the next, I don't know, forever. It never ends well for me when they team up against me. They are the only two people I know who can push my buttons.

"She's cute," Tris says.

"Sometimes," I say. And we both laugh.

We walk toward the pit when Tris says, "Where are we going?"

"It's a place I go when I want to get away from everything. I thought you might like it."

We walk on a narrow path that leads to the rocks at the bottom of the chasm. I found this place not long after a came to Dauntless. I used to sit down here for hours. Not doing anything, just enjoying the sound of the water as it rushed by.

We reach the end of the path and I lead Tris over the many jagged rocks until I find the flat rock that I usually sit on. I sit down and Tris sits next to me.

"So, how are you feeling?" I ask.

"I'm okay. Not to sore from my fight," she says.

"That's not what I meant Tris."

"I know," she says.

"If you don't want to talk about it, we don't have too," I say.

"I don't know what to say Four. There are so many thoughts going through my mind but then at the same time there is nothing going through. I feel like I'm caught somewhere between numb and about to explode."

We are silent for a while. Not uncomfortably. And then she speaks again.

"I feel like I am finally starting to live again. Like the last nine years I wasn't."

I don't say anything. I can feel she is going to say more so I just wait.

"I want him to be alive, I really do. But then if I think about it I get so angry. How could he not have told me he was alive?"

"Maybe he couldn't," I say. Part of me is feeling really guilty right now. How can I keep the truth from her anymore? If only she knew how much I wanted to tell her. That I begged my dad to let me see her, that it took every ounce of my being to have not gone to her and told her the truth.

"Maybe? It's not just what I said to him though. I miss him. I miss him so much. We used to get into so much trouble. My dad couldn't understand it. Caleb was always so good, but not me. I used to love just hanging out with Tobias. We didn't even have to do anything, just go and lay in the meadow near Abnegation. Feel the wind flow over us like we were part of the meadow."

I remember those days. Usually in summer holidays when we should have been helping feeding the factionless. We would sneak off and just hide in the meadow. It was fun.

"My mum always seemed to understand. She often made up excuses for me. Caleb was always trying to get me in to trouble. I think he was jealous that Tobias and I were friends. You remind me of him," she says.

"I do?"

"Yeah. You have the same playful look in your eyes. When you know you are about to do something you shouldn't."

"Like now?" I ask.

She looks into my eyes and I lean down and I kiss her. I'm sure that look is in my eyes right now, because I know I shouldn't be doing this. She deserves the truth. But I may never get to do this again if she finds out the truth.

I don't know how it happened but Tris is sitting on my lap. We are kissing and it is definitely becoming more heated. My hands are on her back under her shirt. She has the softest skin. Then Tris pulls away from me a little.

"What's wrong?" I ask. Did I do something wrong? I have no idea, it's not like I've been in this situation before.

"Why me?"

"What?" I'm totally confused.

"Why me Four? You could have any girl in Dauntless. I don't understand why you would want to be with me," she says.

"It's only ever been you Tris," I say.

"You've only just met me Four. How could it have always been me?" she says.

"I mean." What do I mean? I mean it has always been her but I can't let her know that. "Until you jumped into the net I'd never noticed anyone else. I wasn't interested in anyone."

"But there's nothing special about me Four. I'm not pretty, I'm too skinny. I don't have anything I can offer you," she says.

"It's not about what you can offer me Tris; I don't think I even understand what you mean by that. I like you. I like the way you look. The other girls in Dauntless have never interested me, not the way you do," I say. I must sound like a complete idiot; I don't understand how she can't see how beautiful she is. But then I remember, Abnegation. There are so many things that living in Dauntless has made me forget. Especially how repressive the Abnegation are.

"I mean, I don't know how to say this. The Dauntless girls, they must let you, you know," she says.

"Tris you are the first girl I have ever kissed," I say.

"Oh, so you haven't . . . you know . . ." she says. She is blushing now.

"You mean sex?" I say. I so hope I am understanding this conversation now.

She nods.

"Tris you're the only girl I've ever thought about having sex with," I say. Then I realise what has just come out of my mouth. I can feel Tris becoming uncomfortable with the conversation.

"I mean," I say. Trying to think of the right words so she doesn't think that is all I want. "I don't know what I'm doing here. I have never been in this situation before. I know what I want. But it's not just about that. You are more than that. I know how I feel; I know how you make me feel. And that is when everything gets confusing and muddled. I can't think straight when I am with you."

"I feel the same way," she whispers.

I lift her chin so she is looking into my eyes and I say, "we can work this out together." I lean down and kiss her. Making sure it is soft and slow. Not the hungry, heavy kisses from a moment ago.

"I should get you back to the dorms," I say.

We walk back towards the dorms. When we reach the door to the dorm Tris turns to me and says, "Thank you for today."

"Tris, if you could say something to Tobias, what would it be?"

She looks me straight in the eyes and says, "I love you Tobias Eaton." It is like she knows. She has worked out I'm Tobias. Is she saying those words to me or am I reading too much into it?

I lean down so that my lips are brushing her ear and I whisper, "I love you too, Beatrice Prior."

She pulls away with a look of shock on her face and her eyes are wide.

"There you are. We were just coming to look for you," says Christina. "Come on we are going to get some dinner."

Christina pulls Tris along with her and Will. "You coming with us Four?" Will asks.

"No I've got some work I have to catch up on," I say. I stand there and watch as they walk towards the dining hall. I see Tris glance back but she is too far away for me to be able to read her expression.