Thank you all so much for your reviews on chapter 30. Wow I was blown away, you are all just so awesome. I would like to give a shout out to FourTris Lover (Guest), thank you for your poem I loved it! Your reviews help me to keep writing. So please keep reviewing and following the story.

CHAPTER 31

FOUR POV

I wake up and find that Tris is still in my arms. I can see by the clock on my nightstand that it is just after ten in the morning. We have slept almost twelve hours. I am so glad that I finally got to show her the truth but there is so much more that needs to be said. I still feel heavy from all the emotion of yesterday. I'm not ready to face the day but I know I need too. We both do.

I feel Tris start to stir and I see her eyes flutter open. "Hi," I say. I don't even know how to start the conversation. Do I want to start the conversation? Can I just lie here just a little bit longer without having to deal with the reality of everything that has happened?

"Hi," she says.

We just lay here together. No words, no tears. I don't think I have any left to shed. If I could stop time just once in my life it would be right now. Why now? Because my secrets are out, my secrets are out to the only person I ever wanted to know them. Nine years I have waited to be able to tell her I'm alive. I don't think even I realised how much of a burden I had made it into. But now I have to deal with the reality of everything. Being in this silence with her is as close as I could imagine perfect to be. Because once words are spoken the magical spell is going to be broken and we will have to deal with the past head on.

"Tobias," she whispers. "I don't have words at the moment. I don't know what to say and I don't know how I feel."

"I don't either Tris," I say. "I didn't realise just how emotional this was going to be."

"We can't stay here all day."

"We could try," I say.

"I need some space, I need some time to think," she says. And as much as I don't want to let her go right now, I know I need too.

I hear a knock on the front door. Who could be bothering me this morning? Isn't everyone at work? Then I hear the door open and I know who it is. I let out a groan and say to Tris, "get ready for it."

Next thing Charlie comes bursting into my bedroom and leaps up onto the bed with Tris and I. She starts jumping up and down like she has always done not even bothered with the fact that Tris is here with me.

"Four it's nearly lunchtime. What are you doing in bed?" Hi Tris," she says while still jumping on the bed.

"Come here you," I say as I grab her and start tickling her. "You really are a pain. Shouldn't you be at school?"

"It's Saturday silly," she says while she laughs.

Tris gets up and says, "I really should get going. Christina is going to wonder where I am."

"Can I walk with you? Me and mum are going for ice cream in the pit. Do you want to come Four? You and Tris could come with us."

"Another time. I'm having a meeting with dad."

"You're always working Four. You need to have more fun," Charlie says. "Tris could help you have more fun."

"Come on Charlie, let's let your brother get ready for his meeting," Tris says. Tris turns and looks at me and I know I'm not going to like what I'm about to hear.

"I need time to process this," she says.

"I understand," I say. I don't like it but I do understand. I don't even know what to say to her right now. Maybe time is what I need too.

"Come on Tris!" Charlie shouts from downstairs.

"Bye," she says. And before I can answer she has left the room and I hear the front door close. I lie back down on the bed. Feeling just a little deflated.

I must have fallen back asleep. I wake to see it is dark outside. I've slept for almost a day and I still feel tired. I really should get up but I just don't feel like it. I know I'm hungry but I don't want food. I feel numb. I don't really understand why. I feel like I need to see Tris. I know she said she needed time to process everything but I need to know she doesn't hate me. I need to know everything is going to be okay.

I have a shower and grab my keys and walk out of the apartment. I'll go to the dining hall first maybe I'll get lucky and Tris will be there. I am walking past mum and dad's when the door opens.

"I was just coming to check on you," dad says. "I have that file for you and no one has seen you since this morning. Are you okay?"

"Yeah I just needed to think," I say.

"Okay well you know where I am if you need anything. Here's all the information you need on Marcus. You need to know it has photos of your injuries and the injuries Evelyn received also."

"Thanks," I say. "I'm just going to go and grab something to eat. I'll talk to you later."

I don't really feel like talking to dad or anyone at the moment. I drop the file back at my place and head into the dining hall. Everyone is still at our table eating dinner, including Tris. I walk over and sit down.

"where have you been all day?" Zeke asks.

"Home," I say.

"What are you doing tomorrow? We were thinking of going zip lining again," he says.

"No thanks. I have work stuff I need to do." I don't but there is no way I'm going zip lining. Not now not ever.

"dude, you never come," whines Zeke.

"Just drop it Zeke. I won't be there."

Zeke gets the hint and he starts a conversation with Uriah about what time they are going to meet tomorrow. This gives me a chance to talk to Tris.

"How are you?" I ask.

"I'm tired. I don't know if it's because stage one is finished or if it's everything else," she says.

"It's probably both, it's been an intense few weeks," I say.

"Four I have questions."

"Do you want to go back to my place and talk?" I ask. I hope she says yes. I want us to get back to where we were before last night. I want to be able to get past this. Whatever this is. Because at the moment I feel like we are nowhere and I can't shake this feeling that we aren't going to be where I had hoped we would be anytime soon.

She nods.

"Who wants to go for a drink by the chasm?" Zeke asks.

"Sounds good bro, let's do it," says Uriah. The rest of the group all decide they are going to as well. Tris has stayed silent as have I.

"Tris you coming?" asks Christina.

"I'll meet you there, I have something I want to do first," Tris replies. This seems to be enough for Christina and they all get up.

"Four, what about you?" Shauna asks.

"Yeah, I've gotta go and see Tori then I'll be with you," I say. I don't have to see Tori but I need some sort of excuse. There are going to be too many questions about Tris and I and I don't want to talk about it.

Tris has got up to leave, she is going to leave first and then I will follow when I see Peter stop Tris. "I know you are banging our instructor Tris. Do you really think that's the fairest way to get into Dauntless?" he says.

"I think you should be more concerned about yourself getting into Dauntless Peter," I say.

I can see the shock on his face he didn't see me coming up behind him.

"Oh well, I just meant –"

"It doesn't matter what you meant Peter. If you have a problem with rankings then you come and see me or maybe you would like to go in front of all five leaders. Explain to them what you meant," I say.

"No Four. I'm good, it's all good," he says. Little weasel, I am going to have to watch him. I thought the fact we wouldn't be kicking anyone out of Dauntless this year would mean that we wouldn't have to worry about initiates bullying each other. Seems Peter has a different agenda.

We get to my apartment and we go inside. Tris goes and sits on the couch while I go into the kitchen to get some drinks. I walk back out and I see her holding a picture from the file dad gave me. She has tears in her eyes and a look of shock on her face.

"Is that what he did to you?" she asks. Turning the photo so I can see it. This is the first time I have seen the photo. The photos must have come out of the folder when I threw it on the coffee table earlier. I look at the photo and it is a picture of me lying on my stomach in the hospital bed when I first came to Dauntless. My back is totally ripped to shreds and I have wires and tubes coming out of different parts of my body.

I grab the photo from her and say, "you shouldn't be looking at that Tris."

"Tobias," she says. But she doesn't say anything else.

"It's okay Tris. I know."

"I just," she starts. "I need answers. I feel like I have the start of the story and I have the end but the in between –"

I understand what she is saying. I need to fill in the blanks. "How did I not know he was doing this to you?" she asks.

"It didn't happen often, not at first. He used to take his frustration out on Evelyn," I say.

"Evelyn? Your mum Evelyn. So is she dead or did she escape him too?"

"Yeah she is alive but I'll get to her later. Marcus had beaten her for a long time, at first it wasn't in front of me. But I would see the bruises the next day or would see that she wasn't moving normally. She started to spend less time at home. She would say she was volunteering somewhere or helping a neighbour. Normal stuff for Abnegation. Then she wouldn't come home over night. That is when Marcus got suspicious of her."

"He started following her. I didn't know where she was going but I kept wishing she was at home. Marcus would make me cook him dinner. I could hardly reach the stove and he enjoyed punishing me for any mistake. Especially when it was from ruining his dinner."

"Marcus had started drinking. I don't know where he got it from because no one else in Abnegation drank. That is when he was at his worst. Those ten days after we argued where the worst days of my life. Evelyn didn't come home for three days straight. He kept me locked in the hall closet and only let me out to cook for him. I had to sneak food when he wasn't looking or he wouldn't let me eat. Once Evelyn got back he seemed to calm down a little. But that only lasted two days."

"They got into a huge fight, all I remember is yelling. I didn't understand what they were fighting about. I was allowed back into my bedroom at this stage so I could hear him beating her. I was too scared to leave my room. I was frightened that when he finished with her he would come and start on me. But he didn't, not that night anyway. He left the house only to come back a few hours later with a lot more alcohol."

"The next morning he came and dragged me out of my bedroom to make his breakfast. I could smell the alcohol on him. I dared to ask him where Evelyn was and he smacked me across the room. I don't remember anything after that. It wasn't until I woke up in the Dauntless infirmary that I found out what had happened. They didn't tell me but I heard the doctor talking to dad. I was found locked in a cupboard, I hadn't eaten or had anything to drink in days. Marcus had beaten me continuously. He had done the same to Evelyn."

"How did they find you?" asks Tris. She has tears falling down her face.

"Evelyn was having an affair with Max. When he hadn't heard from her he got worried. He knew that Marcus had hit her before but he didn't realise just how evil he was. He came to check and found us. He had just become leader and so he knew the right people who could help."

"Where is Evelyn now?"

"Factionless. Evelyn was pregnant with Charlie when we came here. On Charlies' second birthday she announced she was leaving and she just left me and Charlie with Max. I was so scared he wouldn't want me but he told Evelyn she couldn't have me or Charlie. I have so much to thank him for. He saved my life and then he took me in and has treated me like I was his own ever since. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him. He started seeing Sasha and eventually they got married. She has been awesome; she adopted both Charlie and me. And then last year they had Jed."

We just sit here not saying a word. Not that I would expect her to say anything but then she says, "I saw them take your body out of the house."

"What?" I didn't know that. I can't believe she had to witness any of what had happened to me.

"I didn't actually see your body. Just the outline under the sheet. They took you and Evelyn out on stretches with sheets over you. We had been walking home, mum, dad, Caleb and me. I remember I was hoping that I would see you because I hadn't seen you in over a week and every time I would walk past your house I would hope that I would see you. So I could apologise. But I didn't, I thought you must have still been upset with me. Which seems so stupid now. And then I saw you and I was hysterical. They had to get the doctor to come to our house to sedate me."

I move over and I give her a hug. She hasn't stopped crying since I started telling her what had happened. I have tears falling as well. I can't believe that one evil mans actions could affect so many other people's lives.

Once she has calmed down I ask, "do you want to stay here tonight?" I know what her answer is going to be but I need to give her the option to stay. I know we have more to talk about but I am spent. I need rest and I know she does too.

"No. Peter is going to start causing me trouble if I'm not seen sleeping in the dorm."

"I can handle him," I say.

"I need some space Tobias. This has been a lot to take in. I need time to process it all."

I don't try to argue with her. I think I need space too. I haven't spoken about any of this in years. I never wanted to speak about it. I always avoided it whenever they had tried to make me. Dad never pressured me thank goodness. I can see now that I probably did need to speak to someone about it but I wasn't ready before. Plus I was a kid and I don't think I could have processed what it all meant back then. I think what got me through it until now was having such a loving family around me. Dad and later on mum, they made me feel safe and that is what I needed to feel more than anything. Safe.