CPOV
I'm afraid to leave her until I'm convinced she's not in pain and pull a chair over to the bed to watch her breath. In. Out. In. Out. The steady rhythm satisfies me and I go to find Taylor who follows me into my office for an update.
"Sir we've confirmed that Ms. Steele's attacker was definitely Jack Hyde. He left Houston at some point two days ago and drove straight through, using no credit cards along the way. We don't know if he was waiting for Ms. Steele to arrive home or if it was lucky timing on his part. My guess would be the former."
"Why did he have enough time to hit her," I swallow hard, "and kick her?"
"Luke was still under covert security protocols and as such was not in the immediate vicinity. He's given his statement to the police already and I was able to record it for our internal reports."
"And? I'm going to lose my patience pretty soon, Taylor. I want to know how this mother fucker piece of shit was able to harm Anastasia in any way!"
"Ms. Steele worked late at Grey House which is unusual for her. Upon her arrival at the apartment complex, she parked her car in the lot while Sawyer parked on the street, approximately a quarter mile away. He made his way to the complex to ensure her safe arrival into the building and saw that her car door was left open and heard her trying to cry out."
My stomach is twisting over and over as I envision her being abused and crying out for help. I have never been more grateful for my wealth than I am right now because it's allowed me to hire someone to protect her. He could have killed her. The words haunt me over and over.
"Hyde had pulled her between the dumpster and the buildings wall and from what Sawyer could see, had his hand around her throat and the other under her skirt. Ms. Steele was kicking her legs and clawing at his face but that's all he saw before he removed Hyde. When he pulled him off, Hyde slashed back without looking and made direct contact with Sawyer. Luke was able to retaliate with a few well placed kicks to the legs but he was bleeding profusely and was unsure if Ms. Steele was conscious or not as she had stopped fighting. Hyde jumped into a light colored car and took off while Luke called for help and attended to Ms. Steele."
If he hadn't been there…"We have to find him. Now! I want every man on our team looking for him, hire as many men as you need to find him. If he dies when you do, make it look like an accident." The papers on my desk flutter to the floor when I stomp by to leave, rushing to go back to her and see her whole and well but I pause at the door.
Fuck! I refuse to think about what he was doing with his hand up her skirt, I will not EVER allow her to refuse close protection again. She can hate me and rage at me all she wants, I will never take a chance on her safety again.
"How many investigators are assigned to him right now?"
"Two, it's the most that any investigation is given in the beginning."
"Not good enough. Get me the chief on the line, now."
While Taylor calls the SPD I check on Ana who is still sleeping peacefully on her back. I took the pillows away so that she could lay flat and remove any pressure on her rib cage and used them to box her in. She looks so tiny, so fragile, so vulnerable and Taylors report shreds through me.
"Christian? Is Ana ok honey?"
"Hi Mom, yes, she's sleeping but she didn't eat anything beforehand. She's also lying flat on her back, it seemed to be the most comfortable for her but I wanted to make sure that it wasn't going to harm her."
"That's ideal, actually. As to her food intake, it's fine for tonight but make sure she eats some protein in the morning. How are you, sweetie? You worried me at the hospital."
I sigh before I answer her. I'm totally, 100% fucked up, Mom. I just realized that I'm head over heels in love with this woman but I just finished telling her today that I couldn't be with her. And now she's been attacked and is sleeping in my bed, which by the way, has never happened before, and if I have my way, she'll never sleep without me again. Oh, and by the way, your best friend and I were fucking for six years starting when I was just 15.
"I'm fine, Mom, thanks. Pissed off and relieved at the same time."
"She's a lucky girl to have you taking care of her, Christian. Call me if you need me during the night, no matter what time it is." I hide my scoff. She's the lucky one?
Taylor is holding the chief of police on the line for me when I come back out.
"Sir, I appreciate your interest in helping our department but I assure you we have the best detectives working on finding the suspect and bringing him in."
"Right. Let me put my request in plainer terms. If you can provide three more officers and find this fucker, I'll make sure that the department is fitted with an entire new fleet of cruisers and for good measure, I'll throw in ambulances as well." His stammering bodes well for me and he continues in guarded terms to give in to what I want.
"Mr. Grey, that is most generous of you. I'll be sending over the lead investigator to your home tomorrow at noon to interview Anastasia."
"Ms. Steele is her name and am I clear on my request?"
"Yes, sir."
I hand Taylor the phone and he hands me mine.
"Ms. Kavanagh wanted to check in."
"Hello, Kate. She's fine, sleeping peacefully and comfortably."
"You'll call me if anything happens? No matter what time it may be?"
"I will."
"I'm going to call her dad and a few other friends now to let them know. Her father will want to speak to you, I'm sure. Can I give him your number?"
"Absolutely."
On my way back to the bedroom Mrs. Jones hands me a paper bag and Ana's purse along with a sports bottle filled with water.
"This way she doesn't have to sit up to drink it. These are her clothes that she was wearing when they brought her in. Her phone has been ringing nonstop for about an hour now. I wasn't sure if you wanted me to turn the ringer off or not since it's in her purse. What else can I do to help?"
"Thank you, Gail. She'll need something with protein for breakfast. I'll alert you when she wakes, we'll eat in the room so she doesn't have to move."
"I'll be available should you need me during the night as well, sir."
Ana's phone begins to ring again and I look at the screen. Twelve missed calls and two of them are Jose fucking Rodriguez who's calling again now. Fuck if I'm going to answer it for him. In the bedroom she still sleeps, bathed in moonlight from the floor to ceiling windows. I pull the chair as close to the bed as I can, draping my hand over hers and finding her pulse. The steady beat under my fingers is proof that she is alive, she is ok and she is here with me.
In my entire life I have never pondered the mysteries of fate, never really even believed in it but Ana has taken everything I ever thought I knew and has shaken it up, forcing me to sift through my own bullshit. Today I tried to end all emotional ties with her and now she's here, in my bed. If that isn't fate, I don't know what is.
Her phone buzzes in my hand with the name of a girlfriend I don't know. I hit ignore and look at my own buzzing phone to see a Washington number. I assume it's Ray Steele and answer it, surprisingly nervous to speak to Anastasia's father.
"Christian Grey."
"Mr. Grey, this is Ray Steele, Ana's dad. Is she awake?"
"Sir, no, she's sleeping peacefully and comfortably right now. I can try to answer any questions you may have and please, call me Christian." I'm fucking sweating! Why the fuck am I nervous right now?
"Start with what happened, as much as you know, no detail left out."
I tell him everything and gird myself for the inevitable question of why she had security of mine with her.
"You hired a body guard for her? When? Why?"
"About a week and a half ago. She mentioned to me in passing that someone had been harassing her and I felt it was prudent to keep her protected. Originally the man hired was hired for covert security but after tonight, she'll have close protection." I'm grimacing but he surprises me and a swell of pride fills my chest.
"Thank you, son. I'm eternally grateful that you had the foresight to protect my little girl. I can't thank you enough. If your man hadn't been there, I can't imagine...I don't know how to thank you."
"Having Ana safe is enough for me. If you'd like Luke Sawyers number, I can provide that to you as well."
"I would, thank you. I'm in Mexico on a fishing trip but we'll be leaving tonight to come home, I need to see her. You'll call me if anything changes or anything happens that I need to be made aware of?"
"Yes, sir."
When we hang up I relax and shut her phone off, I doubt Kate is calling Ana's mother and after the shit I learned about her I wouldn't talk to her anyway. Fuck her. As tired as I am from a sleepless night last night and the adrenaline rush I had today, I don't think I'll be able to sleep but I try anyway. There is a peaceful satisfaction that fills me as I slide next to her and I lean over her body, drinking in the sight of her in my bed before I inhale the scent of her hair and fall into a deep sleep. She is safe, she is whole and she is here.
APOV
"Ugh. Holy shit, ow." Oh my god I'm sore.
"Hey, you ok?" I open my eyes and the most gorgeous man I have ever seen in my entire life is leaning over me with concern etched on his sleepy face. "Hey, don't move! What do you need?" He's jumped out of the bed and is running over to my side, lifting me before I can tell him I need to use the bathroom.
"Ow! Ow! Ow! Oh my god, when can I take another of those pills?" He squints at the clock and makes a weird face.
"In about an hour. I'll have Mrs. Jones bring in some breakfast now so that you'll be ready. I can't believe we slept until 9 in the morning." The confusion on his sleep wrinkled face is about as cute as can be and I snuggle into him a bit to enjoy his warmth.
He stands me gently on the floor of his huge bathroom and then moves as if he's going to pull my pants down.
"Oh my god, stop! What are you doing?"
"Helping you. You need to not move, doctors orders."
"OK, bruised ribs or not, you're not helping me pee so hit the road. I appreciate the ride and I'd like one for the way back but I'm handling this pit stop alone." He starts laughing, throws up his hands as he backs up and goes to tell Mrs. Jones about breakfast but doesn't shut the door. I debate doing it myself but it's so far away and damn do my ribs hurt.
I pee as quickly as I can and then start looking for an extra toothbrush but he comes back before I find one and pulls out an unopened box, puts on the toothpaste and hands it to me before brushing his own teeth. Why is this so hot?
Afterwards he carries me back to the bed which is now fluffed with pillows positioned so that I can eat comfortably. Next to the bed is my laptop and phone along with a small vase of wild flowers.
"Where did these come from?" His look is sheepish and sweet.
"I asked Mrs. Jones to get some for you, I figured you needed some beauty after that bit of ugliness." I want to cry at his kindness but I don't. It was so ugly, so violent and so terrifying that I have to pretend it didn't happen right now. It's too big for me to face yet.
"They're beautiful and so thoughtful. Thank you, Christian." He grins and gives me a shy little smile that melts my heart. Just a scared lonely boy.
I'm in agony right now, the effects of last night's medication has long since worn off but I do my best to temper my outbursts of pain. Each time I make any indication that I'm hurting he becomes worried and agitated. I haven't asked if they caught Jack yet, I'm too afraid that they haven't and I make the assumption that if they had, Christian would have told me by now. That or I'd be bailing he and Kate out of jail for murder.
Instead we joke over our Greek yogurt and fresh fruit with granola. Eating in bed with Christian Grey on a workday. A girl could get used to this.
"Of course you have fresh squeezed orange juice. You are such a prima donna!" I love love love it when he laughs and I love it even more when I'm the one who makes him do it.
"I'm glad to see your smart mouth hasn't changed! Would you rather I got the stuff you mix from the freezer?"
"Mmmm, no, this is amazeballs good."
"Amazeballs, Ana? Didn't you get a degree in English?" Damn I like those tiny dimples.
"Hey, why aren't you at work? It's almost 10am!" He leans back and folds his hands behind his head, his legs outstretched on top of the comforter.
"Not going in today. Andrea moved all of my appointments and I can work from home, actually, from right here." He grabs his laptop and pulls it in front of him with a grin. "You can work from here too if you want, I had Barney drop yours off this morning. I don't expect you to work, I'd rather you didn't, but I know you and you aren't going to be able to sit in this bed all day long doing nothing."
"You're staying home for the entire day? Because of me? You don't have to do that, Christian. I feel bad enough that you had to take care of me yesterday."
"I want to stay here with you and I want to take care of you. As much as I hated what happened last night, I'm happy that it was me who got to bring you home and take care of you. Speaking of which, you have about a thousand calls to return, the first one being your dad. I filled him in on the basics last night but he wants to speak to you directly when you're up for it."
I almost don't want to ask about my mother. The last time I really needed her was years ago and she failed me miserably. I just don't think I can take another let down like that again.
"My mother?"
"Neither I nor Kate called her. We figured you'd decide if you wanted her to know." Oh thank god, I sink back and close my eyes in relief.
"I just can't deal with her right now." Tears are stinging the closed lids of my eyes and there is a ball in my throat that I can't swallow past. Years and years of resentment and feelings of abandonment surge through me and destroy the walls I've built up around myself. I don't know that I'll ever get past what she did to me, eight years later and the pain is still so visceral.
Christian lays his hand on my leg and squeezes it lightly. He understands better than anyone else could. I take a big shaky breath and look at him, hesitating to ask him for a very embarrassing favor.
"What is it? What do you need? Don't ever hesitate to ask me for anything, Anastasia." How does he always know?
"I need tampons." Hey buddy, you asked.
His expression is impassive, totally unaffected by something that most men would find mortifying. Interesting. "OK, I can have Mrs. Jones go pick some up for you. What kind do you need?"
I'm going to just go all in here.
"Actually, I need Kate to bring me some things from home so she can just bring me what I need but I'll need her to come in a little bit." How freaking embarrassing.
He nods at the phone and I call her, the burn of my cheeks heating the cool plastic before she can answer.
"Hi, it's me, I'm fine, in a bit of pain but manageable."
"How was your night? Were you able to sleep? Did he try anything?" Kate whispers the last part of her questions and I giggle.
"It was fine, I did and no."
"Too bad."
"Right, anyway, can you bring me a few things? I need some tampons, some clean…undergarments…and my birth control pills." I do my best to whisper the last part but I know he hears it because his head shoots up from his laptop and swings to the right to stare at me. "Oh, and my copy of 'An Echo in the Bone'."
"Yup, see you in an hour or so, is it cool if a couple friends stop by as well? Everyone is beside themselves with worry." I look over at Christian who's staring me down and he gives me a small nod.
"Yes, thanks, see you soon." The second I hit end on the phone Christian starts in on me.
"Why are you on birth control pills? Are you seeing someone, Anastasia?" He's pissed.
"No I'm not seeing anyone! Not that it's any of your business but I've taken them for almost five years for health reasons."
"Five years? So you started at 17? Aren't all birth control pills for 'health reasons'?"
Oh for Christ's sake. "I take them to regulate my cycle if you must now. Geesh, anything else you'd like to know, Grey? First you want to help me pee, now you're grilling me on contraception?"
"So you're not sleeping with anyone currently?"
"Oh my god! No, I'm not!" So freaking embarrassing! I can tell he's wrestling with the want to ask me more but for now my confession seems to have put him at ease and we pass the morning in good spirits, chatting in between emails and phone calls about anything that comes up. It's weird to be sitting in his bed, both of us in pajamas at 11:30 in the morning but it also feels so normal.
"Sir, Ms. Kavanagh is here to see Ms. Steele. Ms. Steele, how are you feeling today?" Taylor stands in the doorway, entering Christian's bedroom would be uncomfortable for him I guess.
"I'm alright, thank you. I'll be right out. How is Sawyer?"
"He's doing fine, I'll pass on that you asked."
Christian gets up and puts on a pair of jeans and a new white t-shirt that fits his perfectly formed arms and stretches just right across the muscles of his chest. Man does he look good. I stay in my, well, Christian's pajamas, and he carries me, bridal style to the great room where Kate, Elliot and Mia are waiting for me. The two girls all but eat me alive with questions and their concerns and Christian finally tells them both to back off.
I throw him a grateful smile, every question makes me feel less and less safe and more and more anxious and he knows that because he somehow knows everything I feel.
"Mr. Grey, a Heather Plato is here for Ms. Steele." Christian raises his eyebrows and I nod a yes, his protection is exactly what I need right now and the little looks and glances he gives me make me feel just that, protected.
"Send her up." Heather walks in, takes one look at Christian and forgets I'm even there. She's a good friend and I've never seen her stare at anyone like this but even I have to admit that his beauty will render even the most loquacious speechless. He shakes her hand and ushers her to the couch where I'm sitting and the minute she's past him she gives me a silent, 'Holy fucking shit!' I know, trust me, I know.
"Mr. Grey, a Jose Rodriguez is here for Ms. Steele." Oh shit, here we go. His entire body tenses but he nods at Taylor to let him up. One point to Mr. Grey.
When Jose walks in his concern for me is evident but he's stopped by Christian who is waiting in the foyer. He reaches out his hand and Christian takes an extra half second to shake it, just enough to convey his message of disdain.
"Mr. Rodriguez, Christian Grey." Jose looks him up and down and shakes his hand and I know, just know that Jose understands immediately what's going on.
"Mr. Grey, thank you so much for taking care of Ana. She's lucky to have you in her life, I can say with total honesty that you'll always be in our debt for hiring protection for her." Christian's head lifts slightly and he moves to the side so that Jose can hug me and sit with me. One point to Jose.
Christian is never far away from me but he doesn't intrude or seem angry even though Jose and I are sitting next to each other on the couch. I'm getting tired while they all chat around me and tune everyone out for a few minutes while I try to figure out a way to get rid of them all.
"Mr. Grey, a Ms. Mason is here." Christian gestures to send her up. The medication has me a bit fuzzy and I can't think of any friends I have with that last name and when she appears in the doorway, I assume she's one of Christian's friends because I've never seen her before. She looks a bit taken aback but doesn't move towards us and instead looks straight at Christian.
He looks at me expectantly but I shake my head no and he looks at her again. Immediately she lowers her face and I see his eyebrows knit before he walks over to her and grips her arm, leading her to his office. What the heck is that about?
Two minutes later he's back and she's nowhere to be seen. His entire demeanor has changed though and he's suddenly pensive.
"Ana, are you getting tired?" He sits down next to me with a cup of coffee that he hands to me, light, no sugar.
"Yes, I am. Guys, I hate to cut this short and I'm so grateful that you all came to visit me but I'm exhausted. Can I catch up with you all another time?" Everyone stands to go with promises to visit again tomorrow.
"Oh, Ana, do you think you'll still be able to come next Thursday night? I don't want you to feel any pressure, if you can't make it, I will totally understand."
"Oh shit, I'd forgotten about it with all of this crap. Of course I'll be there! I wouldn't miss it for anything. Is it alright if I bring Christian?"
"Of course! I'd love to have you there, Mr. Grey." Christian looks confused but pleased.
"Where is there?"
"Jose is the featured photographer for a new gallery in Seattle this month. Opening night is next Thursday." He smiles and shakes Jose's hand on the way to the door, agreeing to attend and then he floors me when he tells Jose that he's looking forward to it. Man, these pills are strong.
Once everyone goes he has Gail bring us over some lunch, a hearty chicken and dumplings and a spinach salad. Protein and greens, Gail takes her instructions seriously. We eat in silence, I'm still feeling naseaus but if I eat, it's not as bad so I force myself.
"Who was that woman?" Christian shrugs takes a sip of his iced tea.
"Nobody. I thought she was your friend but she said didn't know you."
"That's odd, why would she just show up?"
He closes his eyes and sighs heavily. "Do you really want to know, Ana?"
My heart begins to pound and lunch sits heavily in my stomach. "Is she an ex-girlfriend of yours?"
"No." He shakes his head and looks at me, placing his half eaten lunch on the table between us. "She was sent by Elena as a potential submissive for me."
Submissive. I vaguely remember reading about what that meant in the searches I did on BDSM. I'm going to be sick...she was here for Christian. Oh my god. He's interviewing for a sex slave, that's why he cut you off yesterday. I will not cry, I will not cry.
"I sent her away the minute I realized what she was, I've never seen her before, I have no interest in her or anyone else in that regard. I told you, I'm working that shit out."
"So, you aren't…hiring her?" He chuckles and picks up his bowl.
"No, you don't 'hire' submissives but I'm not interested in having any type of relationship with her at all. I told her that, she left." Taylor appears to announce that the lead investigator is here to interview me and Christian turns from contrite friend to demanding and aggressive CEO.
"Are you up for this, Anastasia? You don't have to do anything you don't want to do." He pulls himself to his full height and pushes his shoulders back to greet the investigator. "I mean it, nothing you don't want to do."
"I want to get it over with but I want you to stay with me." The investigator comes in and takes a quick stock of the place. He's impressed but knows enough not show it. After introductions and a quick shake of hands he asks me to tell him exactly what happened.
I tell him the back story about Jack, the phone calls and the thinly veiled threats that began to worry me. He's surprised that I had protection with me but admits that it probably saved my life, at the very least it saved me from serious harm.
"I pulled in my parking spot and opened the door to get out and immediately I felt a hand on my neck and he growled at me to stay in the car and to slide over. I refused, I knew right away it was Jack so I stood up and he pushed me against the car where I proceeded to kick him in the balls, ah, err, testicles, but he didn't even flinch. He grabbed my upper arm and threw me next to the dumpster where I fell. He called me a 'fucking whore cock tease' and a 'piece of worthless trash' and then kicked me twice before he jumped on top of me and began to squeeze my neck." I'm speaking slowly and quietly, saying these things out loud makes them real and I'm embarrassed by the things he said to me.
"Ana, is there more?" Christian has his hand on my knee and is sitting as close to me as he can get without hurting my ribs. I look at him and he gives me a small smile and tucks a curl behind my ear. "You did nothing wrong, you were a victim, you have nothing to be ashamed of here, baby. Just tell the officer anything else you can remember and then we'll get some chocolate and watch a movie."
He loves me, it's written plain as day on his face and suddenly I burst into tears.
I am so overwhelmed with emotions right now. This perfectly imperfect man loves me and is sitting here, doing his best to not kill someone while he hears me talk about being attacked. My tears set him off and he drops to his knees in front of me, cradling my face in his large hands and kissing my eyes as the tears flow down my face and onto his t-shirt. There was no one to comfort me eight years ago, no one to help me at all.
"Shhh, you're ok now. I'm here, Ana and you're safe and protected. You're ok, baby." I take a minute and breathe deeply, the mantra of my previous therapist on repeat in my brain. 'You are valuable, you are unique, you are important, you are precious'. I've said these words a million times in eight years but thinking them while this man kisses away my tears and does his best to soothe me is the first time I feel them.
He sits again and lifts me carefully onto his lap, stroking my hair and kissing my temple as I continue. For the first time in my entire life, I feel completely safe and taken care of. A few more tears escape my eyes and I shudder when the onslaught of my emotions recedes before taking a calming breath and finishing.
"He kept saying that he didn't want to hurt me and he wouldn't kill me if I didn't make any noise and I tried to be quiet but I was so afraid." My voice is barely a whisper but Christians firm and strong body beneath mine gives me courage. I glance up at him and he nods for me to go on.
"He had his knee between my legs and I could feel something sharp and cold press up against my thigh and he went to push it out of the way and I started kicking. He tightened his grip so much that I started seeing spots and then he reached up and ripped my underwear and that's when Sawyer jumped on him and saved me."
Christian's eyes are closed, the hand that had been stroking my back is still and he's pressed his lips to my temple. His other hand seeks both of mine out and holds them but neither of us move.
"Thank you, Ms. Steele, it takes a shit load of courage to recount events like that and you did wonderfully. I've got what I need, you take the time you need and heal. My partners and I will do everything we can to find this piece of shit." He nods to Christian who still hasn't opened his eyes and then leaves with Taylor.
Without a word I turn my face into his chest and he rises and carries me to the bedroom, laying me back on the bed and fixing the pillows so that I'm comfortable. He walks around the bed and hits a button on a remote he pulled out of his nightstand and a screen comes down from the ceiling while the room automatically dims.
"What are you in the mood for? I think we should watch a comedy." I nod yes and he opens an app that lists every movie ever made and lets me scan them until I find a movie I want to watch.
"Office Space?"
"You've never seen this? Oh my god, it's hilarious! I can't believe you've never seen it, it's one of those movies you have to watch if it's on TV." He shrugs and hits play before texting something on his phone. 10 minutes later Gail knocks with two tubs of popcorn, cold root beers and a bag of Reeces cups. I burst into tears again.
He looks totally confused but Gail gets it and hands me a tissue and smooths the hair on my head before patting my knee and walking out.
"Ana?" He pauses the movie and slowly turns to me.
"You're so good to me, so thoughtful and kind and all I do is take from you." He looks stunned and his mouth hangs open while he stutters to find something to say, running his hands through his hair over and over.
"Ana, what you've given to me can't be bought in a store. You'll never understand what you've done for me. I could give you my company, my home, my money and it still wouldn't measure up." I'm still crying so he shoots for levity. "Trust me, the Reece's were cheap!" I can't help but laugh and he wipes a tear from my face before hitting play again. My ribs hurt but the rest of me feels warm and safe in this cocoon of a bed with a man who claims to have no heart but has the biggest and sweetest one I've ever known.
CPOV
Birth control? What the fuck is that about? What the fuck does she need that for? I want to go to the office to retrieve her medical records, I missed that little tidbit in my frenzy for immediate revenge so I'll have to believe that she's not in a relationship right now. FUCK! The idea of her with anyone is so disturbing to me, it literally makes me crazy inside.
I like this, lounging in bed working in pajamas with Anastasia next to me. This is what I want, right here.
Taylor informs us that the 'troops have arrived' as Ana says and while I'm not exactly thrilled to have people in my apartment, I don't mind having to carry her to the great room as it's a believable excuse to hold her against me.
"Girls, for fucks sake, leave her alone. She's tired and in pain and you're annoying the shit out of her with your badgering. Mia, go get some drinks for everyone and give her a break." Elliot is laughing as he watches Mia pout all the way to the kitchen.
"Mr. Grey, a Jose Rodriguez is here for Ms. Steele." Oh for mother fucking cock sucking sake! Are you fucking kidding me with this shit? In my fucking house?
This one I'll meet in the hall, call it pissing on my territory, call it making my mark but I want this fucker to know that Anastasia Rose Steele is mine. One look at him and I get a little more wary, he's a good looking guy but he's not an ass. Good handshake, eye contact, clear message sent to me; I'm not interested in Ana like that. Got it, you may enter now.
When Taylor announces a Ms. Mason I assume she's another of Ana's friends and when Ana doesn't give me the nod I assume it's her medication and have Taylor show her up. She's tired and half out of it so I'll be kicking everyone out soon but one more quick visitor will help to lift her spirits. When the newest member of this little party appears no one seems to know who she is and I take a closer look.
She's got the long brown hair, light skin, slim frame and downcast eyes. How the fuck did this happen? Taylor quickly puts two and two together and follows me, opening the office door as I grip her arm and steer her right into the room, shutting the door and demanding answers.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"Sir, Mistress Lincoln sent me here to meet with you. She said you were looking for a new submissive, I'm looking for a new Dom. My name is Shayla, Sir."
"I'm not looking for a sub, you just saw my girlfriend so this," I point to myself and back to her, "is not going to happen ever. You've got to go and forget you ever met me." It makes no matter that Anastasia isn't technically my girlfriend yet but the nurses said it last night so I'm going with it.
"Tell Elena the next time she sends someone over unannounced I'm going to make her life hell for eternity. I'm sorry for your time but you've been misinformed." Sheena, Sheri, whatever it was looks devastated, no doubt she Googled me and knows the money I could have spent on her.
"Sir." Taylor knocks and enters without waiting for a response and hands me a sheet of paper.
"Before you go, I need you to sign this NDA, it's standard but you can take a minute to look it over." She picks up the pen and signs it without looking at it, then walks to the door before leaving without a word. Fucking Elena again. She'd been calling and leaving messages for two days now but I just ignored the calls and deleted her emails without reading them. I can't believe she sent someone here! How did she know I was home?
All I can hope for is that Ana doesn't ask who she was but of course she does. Once everyone leaves and it's just she and I eating comfort food on a rainy Seattle day, she just goes right for it in her usual 'Anastasia no bullshit' style. I don't know if it's the medication or if she's just not all that concerned with my previous lifestyle but she doesn't seem to really care. Instead she focuses on Jose's art show and we make plans together and despite my reticence when it comes to Jose, I'm not given much of a choice. Ana will be his friend no matter what I want so I have to trust her and in turn, trust him. Well, that's something new.
I want to get her back in bed, she's clearly tired and in pain but the lead investigator arrives to take her statement and I'm thrilled that she wants to hold my hand while we go over her side. It's the first time I've heard it from her point of view and it shreds me when she talks about his hands on her, how he kicked her and the words he spoke to her.
When she begins to cry my heart breaks and I comfort her the best I can but it's not enough. I am so out of my element, so in above my head.
I've only ever known love on muted terms. What I allowed myself to feel was controlled and distant at best and only for my family. But I know that the ache of my heart and the uncontrollable affection I have for her is love and to see her like this absolutely kills me. Someone hurt her. My Ana. The onslaught of feelings I have for her leave me breathless and weak.
I hold her to me the best I can so that she can feel the safety I offer her and it helps, she begins to speak again but this time it's me who can't handle it. He was going to rape her and most likely kill her. I fight the panicky hot feeling rushing through me, I know this is the precursor to fainting and that would be the single worst thing I could do right now. I want this guy out of here and I want to lock us in the bedroom where I can create a bubble around us. She needs me right now.
Mrs. Jones brings in a tray of snacks for the movie and Ana starts crying again for reasons unknown to me. Gail pats her on the leg, showing a side to her that I've never before seen in her five years of employment and I'm struck again with how removed I've been from my own life and the people in it.
"You're so good to me, so thoughtful and kind and all I do is take from you." What? I have no idea what to say to that, none. She has no idea that she has literally brought me to life and wrapped me around her finger in the process. For the first time ever, I feel alive and she's the reason why but words alone aren't adequate to express the enormity of her presence in my life.
Two and a half hours later we've watched the movie and I admit, it was pretty funny but watching Ana grimace every time she laughed stole a bit of the joy. My mother showed up to check in on her about 20 minutes ago and is now helping her shower and then re-bandage her. I'm jealous of my own mother, jealous that she's seeing Anastasia while I'm stuck talking to Taylor in the security office.
"She's cleaned out her desk and her security passes have been turned in?"
"Yes, sir, this afternoon after Andrea connected the dots. Took it pretty hard too."
"She's been nothing but a hassle from day one anyway. Where are we on Morton's team?" I need something to go right today. Olivia, in a moment of supreme stupidity told Shayla that I was working from home today so she's been canned, quite harshly since I took that pleasure myself. We've gotten no further on Hyde and I've got Carla fucking Adams calling my phone every half hour demanding to speak to her daughter. I've sent her to voice mail six times now, eventually either Ana or myself is going to have to speak to her but I'm hesitant to force her into making the decision. It would bring me immense joy to tell Ms. Adams to fuck off but since I'm pretty sure Anastasia is in my life to stay, I'll hold off on the cursing for now.
"I've got three coverts in place, the first shift started about four hours ago. I'll hire two more to round out coverage and make sure there's no lapse. All have been instructed to be actively looking for parole violations and will report daily on his activities."
I nod and walk out to check up on Ana. She's standing in the middle of my room in a pair of pink and gray pajama pants and that pink lace bra while my mom walks around wrapping and adjusting. Her arms are above her head, holding onto the towel that she's wrapped her hair in and she's giggling at something my mom said. The scene warms me and I walk out slowly before they can see me.
"You're sure you don't want to stay for dinner, Mrs. Trevelyan-Grey?"
"No, Gail, I'm due home, Carrick and I are having dinner with friends tonight but thank you anyway. Ana, same instructions as yesterday, pill at 10p, no movements, lots of rest. Christian, whatever you did today, do it again tomorrow, she's healing nicely." I beam with pride, I'm taking care of Anastasia and doing a good job of it.
"Thank you mom, I'll call you in the morning. My best to the Flanders." She kisses me goodbye, careful not to touch my body and I falter and hesitate before hugging her. I am so grateful for all that she's ever done for me but to see her take care of Ana is the push I need to reach out. She gasps and covers her mouth but quickly embraces me, her arms low on my back so that she stays out of the no touch zone.
"Good night, baby. I love you." She's all but crying and turns quickly to run into the waiting elevator. I smile at her as the doors close, it's the Ana effect mom.
Ana has requested roasted chicken, mashed potatoes and brussel sprouts for dinner and what my baby wants, my baby gets so while Gail gets it all together I carry her back to the bedroom and sit her on the edge of the bed, slowly removing the towel around her hair before getting a brush. She's still and a bit unsure of what I'm doing but when I sit behind her and start to brush her hair she turns her head to me.
"I can do this, Christian. I'm sure you have things you need to be doing right now." Actually I have a thousand things I need to be doing but none of them matter as much as being with her.
"Nope, I'm all yours." I can see the rise of her cheeks as she smiles and I gather her hair in my hands and begin to brush. Wet, it almost reaches the top of her ass and I take my time to brush from root to tip, dragging the bristles on her skin so that she relaxes. The small bruises on either side of her neck enrage me but she can't see the hard line of my mouth from this position. Every scenario I can think of to torture and kill that mother fucker plays out in my mind.
When her hair is combed out I braid it down her back without thinking and reach for her hair tie on the night table but when I turn back, my stomach drops. I've just braided her hair. As quickly as I can I undo it and pull it into a regular ponytail high up on her head. My hands begin to squeeze and rub her shoulders in an attempt to relieve some pressure and her head falls forward while a low groan leaves her mouth.
Oh fuck, this is a bad idea. I can feel the bandage that begins at her bra line and stay above it, afraid to hurt her in anyway. Her bones are small and delicate, the top of her arms barely the circumference of my fingers but there's a fortitude to her that I've not seen in many women. Her dedication to Pilates and healthy eating has paid off, not only in her appearance but in the underlying strength of her body.
Mrs. Jones enters and I drop my hands in my lap to conceal the raging hard on I have while she sets up dinner for us. Ana is cocooned in the softest pillows I own and I sit cross legged across from her while we eat.
"Can we play the five question game again? You just can't ask the same questions as last time." Oh shit. I can't say no and there's no alcohol to hide behind.
"OK but I get to go first though this time." She agrees and we begin.
"Have you and Ethan Kavanagh ever dated? And by dating I mean has there ever been any physical interaction between you two?" She laughs and grabs her side but shakes her head no emphatically.
"That's your first question? God, no. He's like a brother to me, like Jose. Surprisingly, even though he could have dated almost any girl in college he was pretty much a loner. But no, he and I have never had any interest in each other." Well thank fuck for that.
"My turn. How many submissives have you had?"
Deep breath, I knew this was going to come up eventually. "Fifteen." She looks at me to continue and I press on, fully aware of the hole I'm digging myself into. "Elena was my first sub, I've contracted 14 since her, the last one ended a half a year ago or so." Half a year sounds much better than a few months ago. The anger flashing in her eyes is aimed at Elena, not at me but I really don't want to talk about her at all so I jump in before she can ask another question.
"When was the last time you had a boyfriend?"
"Never."
"What? Never? Don't tell me you're into BDSM, I won't believe you." She giggles, and the sound is like music.
"No, definitely not."
"So you've only been with 15 women?" Oh shit, again.
"Not exactly. I've only contracted 15 submissives but when I was training to be a Dom I would…go to clubs that allowed you to practice on submissives in training. Elena also loaned me out occasionally to other Dommes when I was younger." I whisper the last part, the feeling of being owned and loaned was never one I enjoyed and now, after the introspection of the last few days it's even more degrading.
"Oh, Christian. I, I'm so sorry. I didn't know you could do that." I know what's coming next. "Did you ever…loan out your subs?"
"No, absolutely not. I was always monogamous in my contractual relationships. I'm not exactly good at sharing." I wink at her and she giggles again. So sweet.
"OK, so no boyfriends. When was the last time you went on a date? And did you sleep with him?" I want to know but I so do not want to know.
She looks up to think and her brows knit together. This is good, it had to be a little while ago then.
"I went out a few times with this guy Paul in February, so, four months ago. No, we didn't have sex! It's always about sex with you!" She playfully smacks my arm and I pretend it hurt. Baby, you have no idea.
"Why did things end between you and….god I can't even say her name. Reptile lady?" I laugh heartily, it's the perfect description of Elena.
"She touched me on my chest during one of our sessions. I reacted, badly, and told her I never wanted to see her again but she knew I wanted to be a Dom and offered to sub for me until I refined my skills. I was 21 and new to that side of the scene so I agreed. The first few weeks were all about revenge and I was brutal but she kept coming back for more. After I got out my anger all that was left was a typical Dom/sub relationship and to be frank, sexually she repulsed me at that point."
"Moving on, did you kiss this Paul guy?"
"We went out a few times, of course we kissed!" Disgust and fury boil together in my belly, I need to find this asshole and make sure he's not in her life anymore.
"How did you meet him?"
"Hey, it's my turn. Do you have any feelings for Elena at all? Even ones strictly sexual?"
"Absolutely not. I've found the idea of her sexually revolting for eight years now and every time I see her it gets worse. I don't even like her as a person but she's the only friend I've got. Until you came along."
Her shy smile is enough to make me forget about Paul for a moment and I relish the time I'm spending with her. I have her all to myself with nowhere to go for the rest of the night.
"What's Paul's last name and how did you meet him?"
"I can't believe you wasted all of your questions on this." Wasted? No baby, I need to know what I'm up against here. "Clayton, he's the brother of the man who owned the hardware store I worked at in college. He asked me out for years and I finally said yes. We had a nice time but no sparks."
"And did he pursue you after you broke it off?"
"He called twice, once a few days later to ask me to reconsider and once about two months ago to say hi. He's dating someone else now. Trust me, he's no Jack Hyde, I have no worries about Paul Clayton coming to stalk me." Good. I have to question a man who can spend time with Anastasia, go as far as kissing her, and then give up when she says no. What an idiot.
"OK, my last question. I want you to be honest with me too."
The blood starts running at a furious rate, what can she possibly ask now that is worse than Elena?
"Will you tell me when you're sick of having me around and not feel obligated to help me?"
"Ana! Are you fucking kidding me right now? For fucks sake, I love having you here! I want you to stay as long as you possibly can. Have I done anything to make you feel otherwise?" What is wrong with her? It's like she has no self-worth. This is the third time she's made a reference to me not wanting to have her around.
"OK, I'm sorry! Calm down, no you've been nothing but gracious and accommodating, I just want to make sure I don't overstay my welcome, that's all."
"Never. You can't, trust me. Now finish your dinner, you've got a little while until your meds but I want you eating first."
The conversation moves on to less intimate topics, my time at Harvard, her last trip to Paris. I want to know everything about her and listen intently for clues as to what makes her happy. Outside of keeping her safe, making her smile has become my life's mission.