The time with Charlie Bradbury

Castiel, after the first few weeks, was turning out to be a really natural addition to our bunker household. He seemed to be able to get Kevin to relax a little from his usual highly strung state, and they now regularly had quiet discussions over huge bowls of corn chips, or sat together reading in companionable silence. I often joined them, prompting Dean to dub us 'the three nerdeteers'. It needed some work but hell, he'd given me worse nicknames in the past.

It was sort of nice, all of us helping our friend ease into human life. Cas wanted to learn to cook, so I showed him some recipes involving actual vegetables and Kevin, to my surprise, taught us all how to do a proper noodle stir fry the way his Mom made it. Cas wanted to learn to drive, too, which Dean volunteered to take care of a little too quickly. I wished I could have been a fly on the wall for those lessons; they always came back smiling and full of secret jokes and fond anecdotes. Losers. Unfortunately, I was yet to witness any hilarious scenes involving Cas wandering around in a towel and Dean's eyes popping out of his head, but patience is a virtue.

Despite all of this, there was one member of our makeshift family who Castiel hadn't had the chance to get to know. Luckily Charlie rang us up about a month after Cas had fallen, inviting herself to stay for a few days as she'd be in the area. Dean was excited, Kevin was more pleased than he let on and Cas was nervous to meet our adopted kid sister. I was feeling happy about it too, and this only increased when it occurred to me: Charlie had suspected that Dean wasn't entirely straight since she'd met him, and I'd already mentioned his weird tension with Castiel to her. Kevin was fairly indifferent to my quest to release Dean from his own fears, but Charlie would help me. Charlie would see what was really going on.

She arrived around dinner time and made a beeline for Cas, who stood frozen as she hugged him and punched him gleefully in the arm.

"We are gonna become best friends," she promised him in her bright, excited voice. The ex-angel smiled weakly at her and she beamed, eyes darting sharply between Castiel and Dean next to him.

"Deano, you didn't tell me your buddy here was such a stone-cold cutie!" she teased as she threw her arms around Dean's neck. He gave a nervous bark of laughter, glancing at the blushing man in question, who rubbed his neck and grinned shyly in a way that even I had to admit was fucking adorable. Dean rambled awkwardly as he pulled back from the smirking redhead.

"Well, yeah, I just... um... Charlie, wait up. You're a goddamn lesbian!"

Charlie fixed Dean with a beady glare. "Sexuality is not set in stone, don't be so narrow-minded! But yes. I'm a lesbian. Don't worry, he's all yours!"

She left him red-faced and frowning, mouth working but no words coming out. Winking mischievously at me, Charlie stretched up for hug and whispered in my ear: "Holy Hogwarts, you weren't kidding!"

I chuckled at her as she flung herself at Kevin, even drawing a proper laugh out of him with her enthusiasm. "Kev, bro, it's so good to see you! I have a book you'll love and I totally found this chick who's perfect for you, she only lives one state over and she's definitely straight, I found that out the hard way..."

She chattered on as she linked arms with him and led him away. I smiled over at Dean, who had regained his calm and was watching Cas with an amused expression. The ex-angel was looking a little dazed and slightly unsure.

"Hey, man, don't worry," Dean told him lightly. "She likes you."

Cas smiled gratefully at him, shoulders relaxing, and I rolled my eyes. Charlie and I really needed to sort this shit out.

We didn't get the chance to discuss it until that evening. Dean dragged Cas off to watch 'Aliens' straight after dinner, as we'd watched the first film the night before. I settled at the library table with Charlie and Kevin, making small talk initially. However, Charlie clearly meant business and Kevin's presence didn't seem to deter her.

"So anyway," she said casually after a bland comment about the weather. "Have Dean and Castiel always wanted to screw each other or was it a gradual thing?"

I choked slightly on my coffee, but Kevin shrugged without surprise. "They've been that way since I came onto the scene. Sam? Was it love at first eye fuck?"

Both of them were looking at me expectantly and I carefully placed my coffee onto the table before answering. "Almost, yeah. I think it was Cas first. I think he's accepted it, actually, probably years back. It's Dean who doesn't acknowledge it."

Charlie wrinkled her nose at me, seemingly annoyed. "I'm not one to condone pushing people out of the closet, so I understand why you don't talk about it with your brother, but... Have you never thought to just ask Castiel about it?"

Kevin and I exchanged an exasperated look. "Charlie, guys don't tend to bring up that stuff. I doubt Cas wants to talk about it. Crushes are embarrassing."

Charlie's eye roll matched both of ours put together. "Oh my god, spare me the macho shit, you guys cry and bitch more than any of the girls I know. Besides, duh, Castiel isn't a typical dude. He's not even a human, not properly. And this is way more than a crush. They weren't even the same species but Castiel gave up everything for Dean and he's been devoted to him ever since. They can't have a damn conversation without gazing at each other like no one else exists. Guys, it's the real thing! It's proper, Amy and Rory, I'd-die-for-you true love!"

There was a short silence after her impassioned speech. Kevin looked sceptical but I was feeling sort of bolstered by her belief in the feelings between my brother and his best friend. I'd been starting to wonder if I was crazy, if it was a symptom of my isolation from other people that I was investing so much time and energy into subtly encouraging the two men I lived with to admit that they were in love. Sometimes I was sure I'd made up the whole fucking thing in my mind, but if Charlie and even Kevin saw it too, it must have been there after all.

"OK," I said simply. "So what do I do?"

Charlie looked thoughtful. "Well, you can't rush Dean. You know he'll run scared if he has to face this all at once. He needs to think he got there all on his own. And if you won't talk to Castiel about it, I will. Poor guy should have some kind of outlet."

At that very moment, the man in question wandered into the room, Dean nowhere in sight. The three of us at the table all froze as he frowned curiously at us.

"Talk to me about what?"

Charlie opened her mouth but then blushed and closed it again. I decided to divert the situation. "Hey, Cas. Where's Dean? What happened to the movie?"

Castiel shrugged, walking over and sitting opposite me. "The DVD was damaged so Dean is downloading an illegal copy of it from the internet. I questioned the morals of such an action so he told me to, um, 'piss off' and come talk to you guys until he's done. He said it would take around twenty minutes."

"Crappy internet much?" muttered Charlie, but she immediately smiled warmly at Cas. "It's good that you walked in, Castiel, we wanted to talk to you."

"Charlie," I warned, but she shut me up with an acidic look. Cas shifted in his seat and nodded at her to continue. She folded her hands carefully on the table, looking slightly nervous now. Kevin leaned back in his chair, eyebrows raised. I gulped.

"Cas," she began, then paused. "It's OK if I call you Cas, right?"

He smiled. "Of course, Charlie."

She beamed at him. "Cool. Well, unlike these two, I have read the Supernatural books. And they got a lot wrong. I mean, Dean's abs are not nearly so chiseled in real life, and Sam's eyes are hazel, not blue."

Castiel nodded solemnly. "That's true."

Charlie grinned and continued. "However, there are some things in the books which I assumed would be inaccurate, but have turned out to be very true. For instance, you. More specifically, your relationship with Dean."

Cas's mouth tightened and he looked away, shifting again in his chair. "What about it?"

Charlie didn't hold back. "Cas, are you in love with Dean?"

There was a ringing silence. Kevin closed his eyes as if in pain. I gulped again. Shit, maybe we should have left it alone. Cas looked up, eyes wide and shocked. He began to stutter a response. "Wha... I mean, I... I..."

Charlie clapped a hand over her mouth and nose, grey-green eyes wide over the top.

"Oh crap, you are!" she squeaked, the words muffled. I rolled my eyes.

"Charlie, you already knew that, we all did." She lowered her hand and took a calming breath, nodding rapidly, eyes still on Cas.

"Yeah, yep, sorry," she said breathlessly. Kevin snorted and Castiel bit his lip, looking slightly panicky, eyes darting between all of us. Charlie leaned forward and stretched a hand across the table, offering it to him. He stared at it and then, slowly like a spooked animal, he placed his fingers over hers. She hooked their hands together, eyes kind and gentle.

"It's OK, Cas," she murmured, holding his gaze. "Sam's right, we do all know, but Dean is totally blind. And we're not going to say anything to him unless you want us to. You're safe."

He relaxed a little and mustered up a weak smile before looking at me, still wary. I grinned at him, shrugging. "It's cool with me. I've known for years."

Cas's brow furrowed. "Why didn't you say anything?"

Charlie answered for me, expression annoyed. "Because Sam's an emotionally repressed douchebag. It runs in their family. Dean's even worse."

Cas and I both frowned but she was kind of right. She continued in a quiet tone. "Cas, we just wanted to check up on you. Are you OK? Dean's, well... not an easy person to love."

Castiel looked down at the table, at his hand wrapped in hers, mouth twisting to the side. "No, he's not. I'm OK if he's OK, though. Which means I'm OK very little of the time, but right now is pretty good."

He smiled wearily at Charlie and she grinned at him. "Oh, boy, that's cute. But I meant, like... it doesn't bother you? The way he acts? That he doesn't show if he feels the same way?"

Cas looked confused, doing his signature head tilt, and glanced at me again. I nodded encouragingly at him and he replied in a puzzled tone. "I know he doesn't feel exactly as I do. I know that there are different kinds of love. Why should that bother me?"

Ignoring my deeply held suspicion that Dean absolutely did feel exactly as Cas did, I tried to explain. "Cas, normally when you're in love with someone, you want them to love you back. You want to be together properly."

"Be with Dean? As a... couple?" He blinked and wrinkled his nose as he said it, like it was a foreign concept to him. "Well... I guess that would be nice, yes. Of course it would. Yes. But that's just not plausible. Besides, I don't need anything from Dean except his friendship, if that's all he wants to give."

"Wow," breathed Charlie, eyes suspiciously sparkly, and even Kevin looked touched. I grinned like an idiot, weirdly pleased for my brother that he'd managed to inspire such selfless devotion. Charlie gave Castiel's hand a firm squeeze before letting go and leaning back.

"Well, Dean's an idiot if that is all he wants to give," Charlie announced, folding her arms. "I don't care how straight he thinks he is. You are totally worth hopping the fence for!"

Cas smiled at her affectionate wink but then frowned in confusion. "What fence?"

We all burst out laughing.