Sunday, May 14, 2017

The men went to get breakfast.

Below the note, Ed had drawn a misshapen heart and Noah scribbled a few illegible lines which he probably intended to spell his name.

Olivia smiled at the paper and started the Kuerig. Ed had already perused the New York Times, neatly refolded it, and left it on the island next to his coffee mug and Noah's plastic cup. The pleasant expression on her face remained as she imagined Ed and Noah starting their morning as she slept. Ed probably reminded Noah to keep his voice down so they wouldn't wake Mommy.

Mommy, however, had been woken up earlier by her husband. The clock read 3:59 when Olivia stirred from her sleep at the feeling of what she quickly identified as Ed's lips on her stomach. She stroked his head in encouragement and he moved to her hip and rasped a "Happy Mother's Day" before sliding his boxers from her legs and giving her the first of the day's gifts. Olivia arched her back as he carefully maneuvered his tongue and fingers between her legs. No lover of hers had ever approached oral sex as zealously or as meticulously as Ed; in fact, it wasn't even something she particularly enjoyed, but now she craved the feeling of him expertly sending her into a writhing erotic fervor.

The sound of the keys in the lock startled her out of her daydream. Predicting the woman of the house was still asleep, Ed spoke to Noah in a hushed voice.

"Can ya get your shoes off?"

"I wear da shoes."

"No, bud, they're kinda dirty. Take 'em off."

Olivia heard Velcro tearing and two distinct thuds.

"They off."

"Alright, let's put this stuff in the kitchen. Leave your plane here."

When Noah saw Olivia he ran to her and hugged her legs tightly. "Hi Mommy! You 'wake!"

"Yes, sweet boy! Thank you for letting me sleep in. Where'd you go?"

"Fly da plane!"

"And we got food," Ed said, appearing from the foyer and holding up two paper bags. "Bagels and some fruit. Interested?"

"I am," Olivia cooed, smiling and batting her eyelashes at Ed. He came over and kissed her cheek, but she grabbed his neck and pulled him in for a less chaste smooch.

He smiled against her lips, "Happy Mother's Day."

"Happy Muvver's Day!" Noah shouted. "We see Gamma Caraline today!"

"Yes we are," Olivia said. "And the Amaros."

"Amaros!" Noah echoed.

"He probably doesn't remember them," Olivia said regretfully, "It's been a while since we've seen Mrs. Amaro. I really should see her more. She was always there for us when Noah was a baby."

Ed tried to be empathetic, but he was sort of proud that Olivia didn't have to rely on tertiary family friends for Noah's care anymore. "I'm sure she understands."

"Well, at least, I'm glad to be able to go over there today. Sure you don't mind?"

"I told you," Ed said, "It's your day. Whatever you want." He leaned against the countertop and grinned at her. "Besides, you have to deal with the Tuckers later at my mom's."

"I love the Tuckers. This one," Olivia jabbed at the center of his chest with her index finger, "In particular."

"Well, I think that's just because…" Ed trailed off. They both knew what he meant.

Olivia broke into laughter, "Do you want more coffee?"

"I want coffee!" Noah interjected.

"How about chocolate milk?" Olivia suggested.

Noah nodded eagerly.

"So, we'll probably leave around one?"

Ed shrugged, "Whenever you say."

"Part of me would rather stay here."

"We can do that."

Olivia handed Noah his cup. "It will be nice to see everybody, though."

Ed was digging into the bags and produced two bagels and a container of cream cheese. From the second bag he pulled the plastic bowl of mixed fruit.

"Plate?" Olivia asked teasingly.

"Oh, yeah, thanks."

They ate their breakfast at the island and chatted with Noah who, despite having played in the park earlier, seemed more rambunctious than usual. He sprinted back and forth along the floor to ceiling windows, pausing briefly to take in the view of mid-morning Manhattan. The buildings glistened in the sunlight and the cloudless sky had never looked more inviting, as if it were urging everyone to come out and play. When Olivia announced she was going to shower and start getting ready, Ed told Noah to get his soccer ball.

"You're going out again?" Olivia asked.

"We have time?"

"Of course."

"It's such a nice day," Ed pointed out, "And, ya know, he has a game next weekend."

Olivia resisted the urge to roll her eyes and instead kissed her husband. "You're such a good Dad."

Ed beamed back at her. "We won't be long."

"Daddy I got da ball!" Noah said. "Need da keets."

"We can just wear your regular shoes, bud."

"NO! Need da keets for soccer!"

Olivia offered no sympathy. "Better take the cleats, soccer Dad."

Ed shot her a sassy look and took a playful swat at her behind which she deftly dodged. As she made her way back to the bedroom she glanced over her shoulder, winked, and pursed her lips, sending a kiss towards Ed through the air.

…..

Cesaria Amaro apparently did not understand or simply ignored the idea that mothers typically get a break from motherly duties on Mother's Day. When Ed, Olivia, and Noah arrived at the house, they were greeted first by the aroma of grilled meats and savory side dishes, set out in compartmentalized warming trays—the type of supply owned only by those who regularly entertained masses of friends and relatives.

Olivia wasn't sure whether or not Noah would remember Mrs. Amaro. Her uncertainty cleared when he made a beeline into her waiting arms. She whispered something to him in Spanish and Noah did his best to reply, adding, "I talk 'Panish wiff Miss Melia."

Olivia's heart sank and she felt Ed's hand on her back, silently reminding her that whatever she planned to do to help Amelia would have to wait until later.

"Welcome, welcome," Cesaria said, ushering them in, "Everyone's out back. It's such a beautiful day." She wrapped Olivia in a tight hug and accepted Ed's polite kiss on the cheek. "Nick and Zara will be so happy to see you!"

"I'm sure you're happy to have them here this week," Olivia replied.

"Thrilled." Mrs. Amaro's smile seemed permanently plastered on her face. "Now, are you eating now or later?"

"In a few minutes," Olivia said, "Unfortunately, we can't stay long."

"Oh, yes, yes," she turned to Ed, "Where does your mother live?"

"Riverdale."

"Well, save room. Mothers don't like it when their sons come over without appetites." Mrs. Amaro slid open the glass door and announced the Tuckers' arrival, "Nick, I think there's someone here you want to see!"

Beyond the patio, Nick and Gil tossed a football back and forth. Hearing his mother's voice, Olivia's former partner turned and greeted them with a wide smile before rushing over and enveloping Olivia in a tight embrace.

"Liv! Thanks for comin.' It's so good to see you!"

"Good to see you too, Nick. You look great!" Olivia held him at arm's length. "How's the knee?"

"About as healed as it will ever get. Some pain here and there but, overall, it's fine."

Ed had noticed the hitch in Amaro's step when the jogged over to greet them and thought to himself. What is it with these SVU people calling everything "fine?"

Amaro shook Tucker's hand. "How's everything, Captain?"

"Great," Ed replied, "And…it's Ed."

"Alright, well," Nick looked around for Noah, but the boy was already in the yard, cautiously approaching Gil who held the football, "Looks like Noah's made himself right at home. Gosh, he looks big. How's he doin?"

Ed responded before Olivia could get a word in, "Playin' soccer. First game's next weekend."

Nick looked a little taken aback by Ed's sudden buoyancy, "Oh yeah? Sounds fun!"

Olivia's lips turned upwards into a wry smile, "It's a little, um, much for three-year-olds, but Noah seems to like it. He's only been to one practice."

"Yeah," Nick replied knowingly, "Those little kid soccer games end up looking like a giant mass of kids running around randomly. And one or two go off to the side and pick dandelions or something."

"I thought the practice was really organized," Ed added defensively.

"It was," Olivia said, "And Noah's already promised to score a goal for his sister, so…we'll see how that goes."

"Well, hey," Amaro said, breezily changing the subject, "Wanna drink? Beer? Wine? Water? Soda?"

Olivia and Ed both ordered beers and Amaro went to grab them. In the meantime, Noah had taken the football from Gil and was running clumsily towards his parents with the regulation-sized pigskin.

"Here, Daddy, you frow!"

Noah dumped the ball at Ed's feet.

"Sure, bud. I'll throw it to Gil, okay? It's the ball that the big guys play with."

"I big guy."

"Yeah, you're a big guy, but your football's at home." Ed motioned for Gil to run for a long pass and he delivered a perfectly on-target throw just as Amaro returned with the beers.

"Nice toss, Tucker. Former QB?"

"Yeah. High School." Ed massaged his shoulder, "I'm gonna feel this tomorrow probably."

Amaro laughed, "You will. I threw batting practice for Gil's team a couple weeks ago and I was out of commission for a few days."

"He play football too?"

"He's on the football team, but he's more interested in baseball right now. He's a pretty decent athlete and likes to play everything. Now, all the coaches in high school, they want kids to specialize so early. It's crazy."

Ed watched Noah trot over to Gil, grab the ball, and flee as Gil tried to "tackle" him.

"Noah's coach was talking to me like he's Gil's age," Ed snickered.

Olivia wanted to call him out on his sarcasm. Ed was just as serious as Noah's coach; instead, she wandered off in search of Zara and left the men alone.

"Well, you watch, when Noah gets to be five or six? Some parents will be getting private coaches and personal trainers…youth sports has spiraled way out of control."

Ed smiled, "Wow. Youth sports when I was growing up was whatever we decided to play in the street…and maybe some Little League games."

"The good old days."

"Yep."

"So, how's everything else?"

"Real good." Noah delivered the ball and Ed threw another pass to Gil, "Got the new apartment all set up, painted, moved in."

"Yeah, Liv sent me a few pictures. It looks like a great place."

"Stop by this week if you have time," Ed suggested.

Amaro took a swig of his beer and almost pinched himself at the normal-guy version of Ed Tucker. "Yeah, I'll try to do that. I'm planning to stop by the precinct at some point."

"Daddy!" Noah shrieked in delight as Gil held him upside down and ran over with him slung over his shoulder. He giggled as Nick introduced his son.

"Ed, this is Gil."

Tucker shook the teenager's hand, "Star receiver in the making. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, sir. Um," Gil put Noah on his feet, "He took a little spill out there and got his hands all dirty."

Ed looked around, grabbed a napkin and dabbed at his hands, but the dirt was already caked between Noah's fingers. "Let's go inside and wash them in the sink, bud."

Amaro led them inside and pointed down a hall, "Second door on the left."

"Thanks."

Nick walked back towards the sliding glass doors, but Tucker's voice filtering from the open bathroom door stopped him. The former SVU detective held his breath, incredulous, as he listened to the formerly acerbic IAB investigator help his son wash his hands.

"Here, No, put your hands under the water and scrub, scrub, scrub."

"I scrub, Daddy! All keen."

"Not yet, there's still some dirt in there. Keep scrubbin'."

"Dirt all gone, Daddy!"

"Yep. Sure is. Let's dry off and we'll go back outside."

"I play more?"

"We'll check with Mommy. But you can probably play some more with Gil."

"Den we see Gamma Caraline?"

"Yep, and Sarah and everyone else."

"I frow da ball at Sarah!" Noah erupted into giggles and Amaro heard Ed's laughter as well. The easy chuckles were incredibly unfamiliar.

"Yeah, ya did, bud. She's not very good at catching though, is she?"

"Uh-uh. Hitted her on da head!"

"Yeah, we'll make sure she's ready this time. Ok, pal, let's go back out."

Amaro slid outside before Ed could discover he'd been eavesdropping. Olivia was parked on a chair, alone for the moment, and Nick clinked bottles with her and took a seat.

"I was just talking to Zara," Olivia said, "She was going on and on about California. The beach, her friends, Disneyland…she loves it."

"Yeah, definitely the right decision for everybody," Nick said, "And my job there? With the park police? Night and day. Relaxed and laid back."

"You deserve it, Nick."

"You ever think about living anywhere else?"

Olivia's answer came without hesitation, "No. But…I have enjoyed getting out of the city more. As Noah grows up, I feel like it's important that he sees as many places as possible."

"Probably easier now that Tucker's around," Nick cringed at his choice of words, "Er, uh, now that you're married. Sorry. I know he's not just around."

Olivia laughed off the minor blunder. "It sure is easier."

"And it seems like…he and Noah…they get along pretty well."

"Pretty well? You should see them together. Noah's like Ed's little sidekick. Of course, they're together a lot. Ed's job is kind of a nine-to-five thing, so he does most of the pick-ups and drop-offs."

"Lucy?"

"She's finishing her Masters' program, so she won't be around much longer unfortunately. But, I guess, decent timing. He'll go to pre-K this fall I think, even though he's a little on the young side."

Amaro watched Ed toss the football back and forth with Gil and another younger male relative while Noah played his own side game of monkey-in-the-middle. "Tucker's really proud of him."

Olivia's eyes tracked Ed's movements. Though she'd seen the man many times in many variations of clothing and not-clothing, she decided just then there were fewer sexier sights than her husband's biceps bulging against the sleeve of his polo. He'd even humored her by wearing the salmon-colored one she'd purchased for him even though the color was obviously risky.

"He is, but now that he's playing soccer? He's extremely excited. His daughters never played sports and now that Noah is interested, well, Ed's over-the-moon. It's cute…and a little ridiculous."

"Oh c'mon, Liv. You know every Dad has that dream at some point—that his kid's gonna be the next great athlete."

"Is that your dream?"

"Nah…but I'm not sayin' I haven't thought about it. Right now? I just want him to get through high school okay…there's so much these kids have to deal with. It's definitely safer where Gil lives, but it's not like he's in the clear. Still a lotta ways to get in trouble."

Olivia reached over and patted Nick's shoulder, "But he has two parents there with him," she pointed out.

"And so does Noah."

"Lucky kids," Olivia murmured.

"Lucky kids."

….

"Noey!" Barefooted, Sarah skipped out to meet Ed, Olivia, and Noah as soon as she spotted them parallel parking on the street.

Noah fought against the straps of his car seat as Olivia tried to extricate him. "Sare bear! I gotta see Sare bear!"

"Noah, relax. Hold still, or I won't be able to unbuckle you."

Obediently, Noah froze and sat back, rigid, as if he were in a straitjacket.

"Happy Mother's Day, Daddy!" Sarah hugged Ed and bounced from one foot to the other, impatiently waiting for Noah and Olivia, "You should see all the food in there."

Ed held Sarah at arm's length and examined her eyes and flushed cheeks, "And, apparently, all the drinks, too."

"Oh, I've only had a couple," Sarah sing-songed, "You know Grams, always pouring, pouring, pouring. I think Uncle Johnny is already passed out. What took you so long?"

Ed checked his watch. It was just before five o'clock, "We're not that late. But…we got a late start and stayed longer at Amaros."

She jabbed at his chest with her index finger, "Oooo, late start huh?"

Ed rolled his eyes and ignored the question. "Heard from Brooke?"

"I am happy to report that she successfully departed Connecticut and is now at Sonny's party on Staten Island. Gawwd. Poor Brookey. Connecticut and Staten Island in one day. Ugh." Sarah's face registered exaggerated levels of disgust, but Noah emerged from the car and immediately elicited a blissful grin from his sister. "Hi, No!"

"Hi Sare Bear!"

"Wanna go inside and see what's cookin?"

"I not hungey."

"You better pretend you are or Grandma's gonna be mad. I know you have room for cake!"

"Cake not dinner."

"I know."

Sarah led Noah inside by the hand. Ed lagged behind, looking reluctant to go any further. Olivia looked up at him.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothin. Kinda wish we were going home."

Olivia grinned knowingly; two events like this in one day was a lot to ask of the solitude-loving Ed. "We don't have to stay long. Besides, I want to get home early…back to work tomorrow."

"Right."

"Thanks again for going to Amaros."

"It was fun."

"Fun?"

"Yeah. They're good people."

Olivia rubbed Ed's right bicep and shoulder. "Am I going to have to take care of this tonight?"

Ed blushed. "Maybe." Olivia tried once more to head inside, but Ed grabbed her by the waist of her pants. "Hey."

"Hmm?"

"It's still kinda awkward…seein' people, you know, from back then."

This surprised Olivia, mostly because the time at Amaro's passed without the least but of discomfort, at least, from her perspective. "You think so?"

"Maybe it's just me."

"I thought it went well."

"I guess I always feel like Amaro, well, any of 'em, they're constantly judging me, or, us."

Olivia kissed him reassuringly, "That may have happened at first, but now? I don't think so. I think people notice how sweet you are."

Ed feigned being insulted. "Sweet?"

"EDDIE! What the hell are you doing out there? Get in here and be social, well, get Olivia in here, so she can be social!" Caroline scampered from the door, through the gate, and stood, arms akimbo, in front of her son and daughter-in-law. Her short hair looked as if it had been recently coiffed into a more precise pixie cut, and the playful glint in her eyes muted the forced frown on her face. "You come all the way out here to see your mother on Mother's Day and you're gonna spend it out here on the street?"

"I was talkin' with my wife, Ma."

Olivia put her head on Ed's chest, "Sorry, Caroline. This one needs a little prodding. Two events in one day."

"I know, I know, I know," Caroline relaxed and gave both Olivia and Ed a peck on the cheek, "He's always been like that. Your little boy on the other hand is making the rounds with Sarah and already entertaining the crowd. Actually," Caroline waved a dismissive hand, "You probably don't really haveta come inside at all, Eddie. Everyone wants to see Noah and Olivia anyway."

…

"Well, Ma, lemmeproposeatoast." John slurred his words and slumped in his chair. He barely managed to lift his glass a few inches.

Two seats away, Ed set his jaw in frustration. Olivia whispered in his ear. "Relax. We'll leave after this."

At the other end of the table, Caroline held a sleeping Noah and listened intently to John's speech.

Also present were Margie, a neighbor, and two family friends who were in no better shape than John. Ed's brother ambled through the toast, praising his mother, Margie, the neighbor, and, finally, Olivia. Everyone thought he was wrapping up when he reached out and put a hand on Sarah's arm.

"And to you, dearie. Our. Dearest. Sare Bear. Someday, someday, you'll make a great mother."

Sarah forced a curt smile. John wasn't finished.

"We just gotta get you to keep a husband first." John took a blissful sip and looked around the table expectantly, wondering why nobody else was drinking.

Olivia's eyes widened. She swallowed hard and clutched Ed's wrist under the table.

Ed clenched his jaw even more tightly.

Caroline, cognizant of Noah, admonished her son in hushed tones. "Johnny, shut up, will ya? That's none of your business."

"I was—"

Hot tears streamed down Sarah's flushed face. "Oh, fuck you, Uncle Johnny. It's not like you or anyone else around this fucking table can stay married. Hell, even Daddy and Olivia…I'm sure Dad, you'll figure out some way to FUCK THIS UP!"

Sarah froze, knowing she'd crossed a line but not having the words nor the courage to immediately apologize. Instead, she guzzled the rest of her cocktail and stormed out of the room. Seconds later, the front door slammed.

Ed moved to follow her, but Olivia stopped him. "Let her go, Ed."

"No. She's had who knows how many drinks and I don't know where she's going."

"I'll go. You get Noah."

"How in the hell did I become the bad guy?" He muttered with a bewildered expression.

"Get Noah's things and let's take her home. We'll talk about it later." Olivia caressed Ed's cheek. "Trust me on this, okay. She feels bad. I saw it. Let me go."

"Alright."

….

Olivia found Sarah on the front porch with a cigarette. She'd somehow procured another cocktail and alternated between taking amateurish puffs and non-amateurish swigs from the tumbler.

"Hey, Sare."

Olivia expected her stepdaughter to collapse into her arms and offer a teary apology, but the exact opposite happened. Sarah regarded her with narrow eyes and the clenched Tucker jaw.

"Dad sent you to fight his battles?"

"Your Dad," Olivia replied gently, "Is not the enemy."

"Of course you're gonna take his side. But…you just wait, he'll fuck you over just like he fucked Mom over."

Olivia furrowed her brow in confusion since Sarah's recollection of her parents' marital demise always featured Angela as the antagonist. However, Ed was right. She'd obviously been drinking all day and her capacity for clear, rational thought was probably at zero.

"How about we take you home?"

"Yeah right. So Dad can scream at me the whole way?"

"That won't happen."

"Sure it will. You've never seen it, but he will. You just wait. You think everything's so fucking perfect, that you and him and you've changed and he's changed and you have this nice little life and he's buying you paintings and all this shit and a year from now you're gonna be like, what the fuck happened?"

Olivia blinked and tried to shuffle through Sarah's words for any type of sensible thought. "Please let us take you home."

"No. I'm fine here."

"Sarah, please—"

"I said, I'm fine."

The two of them whirled around at the sound of the screen door and Sarah immediately turned away from Ed as he emerged with Noah slung over one shoulder and the bag full of kid supplies hanging from the other.

Smartly, Ed ignored his daughter and continued wordlessly to the car.

Before following him, Olivia whispered, "Call me if you need me."

…..

Monday morning at the precinct flew by not because of work but because everyone—Fin, Carisi, and Rollins had Mother's Day stories to tell and photographs to share. It was almost noon before a call came in, taking Rollins and Carisi away.

"I'm gonna go get some lunch, Liv," Fin said, "Want anything?"

"I'm good. No thanks."

"Alright. Be back in a few."

Olivia went about clearing her email inbox which had become hopelessly cluttered while she was on her mini-vacation. She was just getting into a groove when her phone rang. Brooke's name popped up on the screen. Olivia double checked the time. It was an odd time to get a call from her.

"Hey Brooke, what's up?"

"Have you heard from Sarah?"

"Not since yesterday." Olivia closed her eyes, trying to mentally block out Sarah's drunken rage session. They were going to have to hash that out sooner or later, and she wasn't looking forward to it.

Talk about awkward.

"Yesterday?" Brooke sounded panicky. "I got a call from her office. She didn't show up today and they can't reach her. And neither can I."

"She's not picking up her phone?"

"It's either off or dead. It goes straight to voicemail."

"Was she at home last night?"

A few seconds of silence.

"I, uh, I was at Sonny's last night. Her bedroom door was closed when I got there this morning, but it was so early…"

"Okay. Just…relax. I'll go over there."

"Thanks, Liv. Keep me posted. I'm…I'm so worried. The last text I got from her, well, I didn't think it was a big deal at the time but now…"

"What'd it say?"

"Just that she," Brooke lowered her voice to a hushed whisper, "fucked up big time and she felt horrible about something. Not sure what she meant."

…..

#Tuckson

#Cliff