CPOV
"Oh my goodness, when did you do all of this?" I almost laugh and give myself away. I had completely forgotten about the flowers and candles and special dinner for Ana that I promised her. She moves from arrangement to arrangement, touching the petals and smelling the bouquets.
"Technically I didn't do anything. I had Andrea and Gail follow my instructions though."
"Well, you instructed well and they did a very good job. I love it, thank you." She's got to stand on my feet and then on her tippy toes to reach my mouth but she does, sweetly thanking me with a few nips and a lick of her tongue. Even after two workouts and a long day at the office she still smells good. Is it natural to want someone this much so often?
When she swats my ass I'm momentarily stunned. I don't think anyone has ever done that to me before. In fact, I'm sure no one has. "Why don't you get in the shower while I heat up dinner and then I'll join you."
That's a set of instructions I don't need to be told twice to follow. Just as I step under the hot water to rinse off the soap she steps in, squealing at the temperature. One quick tap of the button on the wall and we're down eight degrees to where she likes it. It's a bit too cool for me but I plan on heating things up right now anyway.
I watch and wait while she rinses out the shampoo and then help her lather the conditioner in before she loofahs her body from neck to toes. Before she has the chance to rinse those enticing suds off, I make my move, pressing behind her.
"One hand on the wall, Ms. Steele." Immediately she complies, gasping when I lift one leg straight up in the air as if she were a ballerina. "Now hold your ankle while I lick that pretty little pussy of yours." Water streams onto my shoulders and down my back, bringing blood to the surface of my skin, heightening every sensation.
I want to dive right in, demand an orgasm from her that will bring her to her knees and eradicate that stupid question from her memory but I restrain myself and tease instead. Her leg buckles, the other one slipping from her grasp when I finally latch onto her clit.
"Oh god, yes." Her pants are barely audible over the fall of the water but I hear enough to know she's not thinking about anybody but me. "Oh, Christian, right there. Yes." A series of yes's follows, the volume of them getting louder until I stand and thrust inside, my hand lifting her leg even higher.
"Who's been inside of you, Anastasia?"
"You, only you."
"Will there ever be another?" I thrust hard and grab a handful of her hair, grinding against her.
"No. No, just you, Christian." Damn that soft sweet voice just does it for me.
There are times when I'm with her that I want to go slow, I want to be dominating and in control but I just can't. The need to connect with her is too great, the desire to lay claim to her body too intense to deny. Right now is one of those times. Fast, hard, furious. This is how we finish together, panting underneath warm water, arms tightly wound around each other until she kisses over my heart and leans back against the wall.
"You have a way of making me dirty even in the shower." Water runs over her body and down the flat plane of her stomach and even though I shouldn't, I wonder what she would look like pregnant. Will she still let me do the things I want to do to her? Will she be shy with her body when my child grows inside of her?
Slow down, Grey. You've got to get her to marry you first.
"Come on, I'm starting to wrinkle in here." She swats at my ass again, pulling me from my daydream.
"You itching for a spanking, woman? Because it hasn't escaped my notice that you're dishing them out tonight."
"Can't help it, Grey. You have the most spankable, squeezable, kissable ass I've ever laid eyes on." So ridiculous but I can't help the beam of pride that shoots through me. She likes my butt.
Dinner is just as she requested. Brussel sprouts, spinach and potatoes. I had Gail make me a steak since I'm not a rabbit but Ana curls up on the couch in the library with her unsweetened iced tea and grins at me. She looks so relaxed and happy right now in this moment that I pick up my phone and take a picture of her just as she stabs a potato.
"You have some strange eating habits." I tease, my toe kicking at her knee on the couch. She chokes and coughs, covering her mouth with the back of her hand and giggling.
"Oh yeah, you have some strange sexual habits."
"Touché, Ms. Steele. You win that round but I will happily point out that they are quickly becoming your sexual habits as well."
Per her request we're watching a movie called 'Shooter'. It takes me a few minutes but then I catch on. She has a thing for the lead actor! Anytime he comes on screen she pays attention just a little more than she had been before. When he's laid out shirtless on the bed she stops chewing and stares. I know this because I'm watching her very carefully right now.
"You want that guy!" Her blush and nervous smile tell me all I need to know. "You little hussy! You've got me watching a movie with a guy you want in it." On the outside it appears as if I'm teasing but inside, I'm actually kind of pissed.
"I don't want him. I think he's cute."
"You wouldn't fuck him if given the opportunity?" What the hell is his name? I need to add it to the 'never to be around Anastasia' list. Mark something or other. Wasn't he a rapper in the 90's?
"No! I wouldn't sleep with him! I'll only do that with you! Didn't we just go over that in the shower not twenty minutes ago?"
"I didn't mention anything about sleeping. I said fuck. Say it." She laughs and takes another bite of dinner, waving her fork as if to tell me no.
"You can't make me say bad words. You've got the market cornered on that, there is no need for two potty mouths in this relationship. Someone's got to keep it classy."
"Ooo, that's going to pose a problem because what I want from you tonight is not classy. Not even a little bit." Her chin lowers to her chest, her brows raised in concern.
"And just what might that be?"
"Practice."
"Practice for what?"
"London."
"Practice for London. You realize that makes no sense, right?"
"It will. Eat up, you'll need your strength."
"Oh god."
"Yes, you'll be saying that quite a bit I imagine."
"Oh god." I can't help but chuckle at her alarm.
"Good, keep practicing."
"Christian Grey you are such a pervert!" Now I'm really laughing, watching the blush of her skin creep over the top of her tank top. I'll miss when it's too cold for her to wear them, I've come to appreciate the sight of her bare shoulders so much.
"I should warn you that due to the length of time I'll be away, I'm going to need to fuck you at minimum six times a day for the three days leading up to my trip. I will also need to reserve your pussy, your breasts and your mouth for Sunday evening when I return."
Her laughter stops and her lips pout out. "I'm seriously going to miss you." I say nothing back because the truth is that I'm dreading this trip. This petite woman sitting next to me has become the nucleous of my entire existence. To be without that for five days seems like an impossible feat. Flynn tells me that this break is a good thing because it will force me to take time and reflect and to cope without her but I call bull shit on that.
After the movie, which I begrudgingly agree is pretty good, she grabs some chocolates while I grab some wine and the body oil from the playroom. While The Fray sings 'Look After You' I settle her between my legs on the couch in nothing more than her little boy shorts. Her fingers rest on my knees on either side of her, idly circling while I massage her shoulders and back.
"Are you still nervous about tomorrow, Christian?" Icy fear stabs at me but I push it away and focus on her body language. Is she nervous about tomorrow?
"I'm not nervous per se. I just hate that it's come to this. I'm pissed at my team for not finding a way around this but even I have to concede that she's done a good job covering her tracks. If there are even tracks to cover." She huffs and sips her wine.
"Scum like her always has something to hide. The only thing I'm afraid of is finding out there are other teenage boys involved." She may as well punch me in the gut.
"I'm not thrilled that you're sitting down with an...ex either."
"You said yourself that it wasn't unusual for potential subs to interview past subs when they were considering signing on with a new Dom."
"It's not, Ana but you're not a sub. Look, I understand that this is probably our only option at the moment as do Taylor and Welch. But it doesn't mean that I'm excited about it. I fucking hate this."
"Where will you be while I'm inside with Lillian?"
"Outside in the car across the street and a bit down the block. Welch thinks I should wait at GEH but I can't be that far from you." Because if you decide to leave me, at least I can start fighting for you right away.
"Well, I'm not nervous at all. I admit, I'm a little curious about her. I have a much better understanding about the whole 'lifestyle' as you all call it but I want to understand the women involved in it. I can see the appeal now but how do you get started in it? Like, how did they know that kind of sex was for them? Why not regular sex? Do they all have a past like yours or is it just how they're wired?"
"Oh for Pete's sake, Ana. This isn't an inquisition into BDSM, this is a chance for us to get into Elena's world without her knowing it. I need you to feel Lillian out, see if she's aware of anything untoward on any level and then get the hell out of there. You're not writing your dissertation here."
"I can feel you rolling your eyes, Anastasia."
"You cannot feel me roll my eyes. That's just ridiculous."
"Did you or did you not just roll your eyes at me?" Under my hands her back shakes a little with a suppressed giggle.
"Fine! I did! But it was deserved!"
"I'll let it go for now considering the topic. Taylor will sit down with you at breakfast tomorrow and go over everything one last time. He'll outfit you with the wire on the drive over to the coffee place and he'll be the one to collect it from you when you leave. I have no idea how much Elena has told her about how I operate as far as security goes but only the last few subs would know who Taylor is and none of them will know Sawyer who will be in the café with you so you'll be surrounded by protection."
"Wait, none of them had security?"
"No, why would they have? Nobody knew they had access to me so there was no need."
"But I had security long before we were an item, before anyone knew I had access to you." I lean forward and kiss the middle of her bare neck.
"Yes, and that's because I loved you even before you shared your glorious pussy with me."
"Oh my god, Christian! You had better watch that language tomorrow when Sophie is here." Who the hell is Sophie?
"Taylor's daughter, Christian." Caught red handed on that one.
"She'll be in their apartment, not ours. Besides, with Taylor as her father, I'm sure she's heard it all at this point. Lean forward a little, baby." I ignore the beginnings of an erection when she starts moaning in appreciation and instead look around the room counting bookshelves to distract myself. Where did I get all these books?
"It's so strange to think of Taylor as a father. He's so…taciturn and private. I'm actually really looking forward to seeing this interaction. What's she like anyway?"
"Who? His daughter? Small, blond, a girl. That's about all I know." Her body turns, arms slack, eyes cutting.
"Her father is dedicated to taking a bullet for you and spends close to 24 hours a day within a few feet of you and you don't know anything about his daughter? That's a disgrace. What's she like? How old is she? Is she into dolls or Lego's or art? You seriously know nothing?" Should I? Shit I'd never even thought of her outside of paying for her private school tuition.
"I know that she can ride a bike. I overheard Taylor telling Mrs. Jones a few weeks ago that she learned on a vacation she was just on with her mother."
"Well I can't wait to meet her. Gail said this is the first time she's staying over. Why is that?" Oh god, do I really need to spell it out for her. This massage was supposed to relax her, instead I need one now.
"I assume because it wasn't really the type of place you wanted to bring a kid around. Besides the angry sullen guy she'd have to tip toe around, it's not exactly fun here for a kid. I guess he feels like with you here it's more of a home now. Because it is. More of a home I mean."
She hums with contentment. Whether it's from Taylor's approval of her or the feel of the massage, I don't know.
"This feels so good, you really are very good with your hands, Mr. Grey." Now we're on comfortable ground again. Oh, Ms. Steele, by the end of the night you'll be better trained with your hands as well. "Tell me about London. Where are you staying? What are you going to do outside of work? What are you there for anyway?"
And just because I can I reach around and squeeze her breasts, pinching the tips until she squeals before resuming my work on her back.
"I'm staying at the Corinthia Hotel in the Hamilton Suite which is where I always stay in London. Outside of work I have no plans and don't have time for anything anyway. As to what I'm there for, it's complicated but basically I'm purchasing a company that works in the field of actuarials and statistical consulting. GEH is paying a fortune to outsource that particular need and to get a new division started would take time and money that I don't want to spend. It's easier to find an established firm and acquire it. The problem with this firm is that it was founded over a hundred years ago and it's been a family business since then. So a lot of ass kissing and wining and dining is needed to finalize the deal. My team laid the groundwork, now I need to go finalize it."
"Why in London? Aren't there companies here in the US that you could buy?"
"Yes but most of my actuarial needs are for the shipping industry and most of that network is overseas. I need an established international company, this one fits the bill."
"Will you need to spend more time there once the deal is done?"
"Not really, I'll send Ros over to set things up for a few weeks and check in occasionally like I do my other international companies. Why do you ask? Do you want to go there?"
"I do want to go there but I was asking because I'm trying to get a handle on how much you travel. You said yourself last week that you've done less travelling in the last few months than ever before. I was just curious how often you were gone."
"I hate business travel and I do it as infrequently as possible." But then I realize she's asking because she's trying to picture her future life with me. "I send Ros and my other VP's as often as I can in my stead. I assume that when I have a family I'll travel even less." I say it as indifferently as I can but my heart feels like it may fly out of my chest and without thinking my hands drift around to her belly, grazing over it until I regain my composure and slide them back up to her shoulders.
"Christian…" Say it baby, just say the word and I'll run and get that diamond out of the safe and call a justice of the peace right now. "Maybe we can plan a trip there together soon. I'd love to see where Hardy and the Bronte sisters lived." What?
Hardy? The Bronte sisters? Fuck me. I need to get out of here for a few minutes, clear my head, slow down my heart, maybe knock back a few shots of bourbon. Three months, Grey, it's only been three months. Fuck Flynn and his rationalizations. I'm sick of waiting.
"I'll be right back. Take off your shorts while you're waiting for me." On my way out I grab my wine and finish it off, the last few sips of alcohol just what I need right now. It takes me less than a minutes to get up to the playroom, grab the restraints and make my way back to the library. It would be a lie if I said my gaze didn't linger on the floggers for a few extra seconds.
"You're still dressed." Right where I left her she stands in just her shorts, her arms crossed over her chest and a worried look on her face.
"You're angry with me."
"I'm not angry, Ana, I'm…waiting. I don't do waiting very well. Or at all really." I will not guilt her or force her into anything no matter how badly I want it. My normal MO of steamrolling, bullying and manipulating don't work on her anyway, all I'd be doing is delaying everything and there is no way in hell I'll risk that.
Her arms drop to say something but I shush her, stalking towards her like a predator to it's prey. Having a conversation about our future together? Not going to happen right now. If I had my way, I'd have her over my knee, ass red and begging to be fucked. But since that's not really an option at the moment, I will keep with my original plan.
Ana. Tied up. Spread open for my viewing pleasure.
"Put the blanket on the couch there and then take your shorts off." If the change of topic and mood in the room phases her she hides it well. She almost seems relieved to have avoided the conversation and does as she's told without her usual snark.
"Are you a Dom right now?"
"No, Ana. I'll be your Dom in the playroom. Anywhere else, I'm your boyfriend who likes to be in control. Now sit on the couch, facing out, legs wide and bent. I want to see all of you." Hesitantly she does as I say, staying perfectly still while I cue up Prince's 'Darling Nikki'.
When I attach the cuffs to her ankles she closes her eyes and covers herself. For now, I'll let her. Once the restraints are secured to the bottom legs of the couch in the back and I ensure that other than her arms she can't move too much, I push the coffee table closer, drop a few beads of oil onto her chest and then hit play.
Innocent green eyes widen as the lyrics are sung out, the reality of what I want her to do all but spelled out for her. I'm hard as granite right now, sitting just a few feet away from her nakedness but I don't touch myself or her.
"Rub the oil over your breasts, Anastasia." Fluidly she does, her lashes fluttering and then closing so that they rest on her flushed cheeks. While she gets lost in her own body I strip quietly and then sit across from her, leaning back on my palms.
She is so beautiful, so sensual and she doesn't even know it. Nothing I've ever seen even comes close to the sexual powerhouse that she is. Each breath causes her smooth belly to ripple, small muscles creating little ridges that turn me on even more. I have made it a point to study her body but with London coming up, I'm taking a crash course in all things Anastasia. The way her thighs connect with her torso, the way her toes curl a bit when she's excited. The way her pinky finger stays up and extended when she rubs herself, the way she gets that V between her brows when she's really turned on. These are the visuals I will call on when I'm without her.
I'm as pleased as I am surprised that she hasn't argued or been embarrassed by what I want her to do. I am thoroughly enjoying my private show and just as she starts to pinch and pull on her own nipples I feel the first drop of precum run down the side of my dick. I may need to alter my plans; I don't see myself holding out for much longer. She hasn't even touched her pussy yet but she's wet and ready, open to whatever I want to give her. A man can only take so much...
"Now between your legs." Her eyes fly open and her hands stall, flattening against her belly before I fist my cock, the bold move so mesmerizing to her that she forgets to be shy and slides her middle finger over her cleft. We're not touching but between us is an electricity, a current that connects us. Whether or not she feels it, I don't know but I don't know how she couldn't.
In the pit of my stomach sits desire so heady for this woman that I'm paralyzed by it. If the building began to crumble I wouldn't even notice. My world consists of my body and hers and the sirens' call between the two.
"Two fingers now, Anastasia." Pressure builds in the base of my cock as the pleasure mounts. "Faster." So fucking hot. So mother fucking hot. Her eyes flash to mine, a string of noises so sensual they should be illegal and I watch as she falls apart in front of me, her legs pulling against the restraints, her chest flushed, her head thrown back. Beautiful. Erotic. Mine.
In an instant I remove the cuffs and sit down next to her, reaching over and lifting her onto my cock, her sweaty back sliding effortlessly against my chest. The second her wet heat envelopes me I cry out and grip the satin smooth skin of her hips, struggling to hold onto hard fought control.
On instinct she tries to move but I stop her, wrapping my arms around her and holding her against me. If she moves, this will all be over too soon. Heat, heavy and salacious threads between us so that our bodies are slick against the others. It only adds to the sensation, the rawness.
"Don't move. I just want to feel you, memorize you." Under my hands her heart begins to speed up and her hips struggle to stay still. "Relax, baby."
Slowly she reclines back, her legs bent on either side of me, the back of her head resting against my shoulder. "I'm going to touch you now but I want you to stay still." Her face turns into my neck and kisses behind my ear, the sharp inhalation of her breath when I cup her breasts breaking the tiny contact. "So heavy, Ana. So firm and perfect. I love your breasts."
Against my neck she pants with each twist of my fingers, each pull, each squeeze. Around my cock she begins to rhythmically pulse with each heartbeat, her hot cream raining down on me until it coats my thighs. I'm at the threshold of my control, caught between heaven and hell.
Sharp teeth bite down on my ear lobe when my fingers brush against her clit, hard and wet, throbbing under the pad of my finger. She cries out when I get the pressure just right and begins to grind against me but my other hand grips her hip and holds her still.
"Don't move!" I growl out against her mouth, turned towards me to seek more of a connection. "I want you still, I want to feel you come around me, every spasm, every rush of heat. When I'm alone in that hotel room I want to remember exactly what you feel like when you come." She moans low and long and then falls silent, her thighs trembling when only a minute later I feel her quiver all along my shaft. It begins slowly, a constant pulse that bathes me with liquid fire until the pulse becomes a clench, long and unyielding. When she cries out my name my head falls back against the couch, the pleasure of her pussy milking me too much to take.
Still I hold her immobile until the last spasm is over and then I take what's mine. Her hands fly out in front of her and flatten against the low coffee table, my feet kicking hers wide open at the same time my hands grip her hips. Faster and harder than I've ever fucked before in my life I drive into her, emptying all that I have into her depths.
The sound of our bodies drowns out everything except the blood rushing through my head and I come with a roar, pushing myself against her so hard she falls onto the coffee table with me collapsing on top of her.
"Shit." I whisper a few minutes later which sets her off on a giggle tangent. After a few seconds I laugh with her for no reason, lifting her only to fall back onto the couch behind us, both of us sprawled out, entwined and exhausted.
"I had visions of me flying across the room if you had let go. My god, baby, my butt is going to be bruised in the morning." Damn right it will.
"I can't help it, you make me lose all semblance of control. Shit that was good."
She actually stumbles on her way to the shower so I toss her over my shoulder, smacking that round ass and then pausing to admire the view of her like this in the mirror. Thoroughly fucked.
One quick rinse later we fall naked into bed pressed against each other, wet hair and stubbled chin be damned. And like so many nights in the past few months when I wake in the dark, hard and throbbing I reach out and rouse her just enough to slide into the place I'm desperate for until the need is satisfied and I can sleep again.
APOV
Clammy. That's how my hands feel. Dizzy. That's how my head feels. Sore. That's how my butt feels due in part to Christian's amorous…love making last night and the hard wood of the chair I've been sitting in for thirty minutes now.
I was half expecting and surprisingly disappointed when Taylor didn't give me an ear piece to wear this morning. I thought for sure he was going to pull one out after he'd taped the wire to my chest and situated the tiny microphone in a button. Let me correct myself. Christian taped the wire and then Taylor adjusted the microphone. I'm certain there will be a discussion as to how no one is to 'tape Ms. Steele' again unless it's him.
At exactly 11am Lillian walks in and looks around, her eyes lighting up when they find mine. She weaves between the seats and passes Sawyer and Prescott who are 'reading' the newspaper and reaches out with one arm to embrace me. I react and do the same, the contact startling me. This is real. I'm actually doing this right now.
"Hi! I'm so glad you called, I was beginning to think we'd scared you away!"
"I know, I'm sorry. It's just been very busy lately and I didn't want to make plans and then cancel them if something came up. Thank you for making time today." She waves me off and smiles.
"No problem. Did you want anything? I'm going to get myself a tea and a scone." I am under strict instructions not to accept anything from her for fear of poison, really, so I decline politely and sip my luke warm coffee instead. Sawyer glances over and I give him a small smile before he turns back to his paper.
In line she chats with another patron, friendly and open. Prescott is staring at my phone which is face down on the table should I need to flip it over as a sign that there's trouble while some guy I don't know is staring at Lillian. Bryant I think was his name. What is it with Christian hiring security that has last names that are also first names?
"So did you get a chance to look at the site? I hope you found it easy to navigate and helpful. I realize you're still under contract but if you want to leave information for whomever will come after you, that'd be great." Fiery rage explodes in my chest but I temper it down and cover my growl with a cough.
"I've glanced at it but haven't studied it. I'm afraid to break the NDA, you know?" She looks at me quizzically, dunking her tea bag, Tazo Chai in before adding a sugar.
"Why? Elena set it up under his instruction. It's all about helping his subs be the best they can be for him." Elena. Well, there you go, confirmation of her involvement. "It saves him the time and effort of retraining each new girl you know?"
"So you still speak with her? Elena I mean. I don't know much about her other than she's quite involved in his life..." Long legs cross in front of her and tap against the leg of her chair, carefree and oblivious to the lie sitting before her. I almost feel guilty.
"Oh sure, we all do. Not often but enough to keep the lines of communication open. Nine of us still use her but I'm pretty sure Courtney is getting ready to pull her agreement. Her Dom isn't at all what he was hyped up to be. But, then again, who is after you've been with Sir?" My stomach roils and turns at the mention of that name. For a split second I see her on her knees in the position he put me in but I push it away and block it. It's only me now.
"He is the best." I offer, lifting my cup in salute. Her eyes roll.
"Tell me about it. I was pretty inexperienced when we started so I just assumed all Doms were like him but I quickly found out none of them are. Had I known, I'd have fought harder to stay. Not that he'd have let me, he was so closed off then. I daresay our website helped you overcome that? At least, I like to think that had something to do with it. It's nice to see him out and about and happy, you know?" She winks and smiles.
"How did you come to him anyway? Elena said she couldn't figure it out which is surprising since she knows everybody in the lifestyle. She was all bent out of shape about it which was unnerving to be honest. I mean, nothing flusters her. I hadn't heard from her in almost a year since I'm in a steady TPE relationship but she was adamant that I get ahold of you so that you could at least utilize the website."
"The SubClub website?"
"Ugh. I hate that name, one of our younger members came up with it. We prefer to call ourselves the Stiletto Mafia." She lifts her foot to showcase her four inch light blue heels and giggles. "You had all of us in quite a tailspin when those pictures first came out. And then he confirmed that you were together? How did you do it?"
"Oh, you know, I think we probably weren't careful and we were spotted out and what's he supposed to say?"
"Yeah, we figured it was something like that. But how did you even get him to go out with you? I don't think anyone but Leila ever got him to leave the apartment and even then it was so that he could drive her somewhere." Shit shit shit, I was not prepared to answer her questions. Damn it, I suck thinking on the fly!
"Um, I think maybe he's just tired of the all the work that goes into staying out of the public. That and he's a lot more visible now than before so people watch him more closely."
"So how did your move go?"
"What move?"
"From your apartment, you were moving. I'm assuming the blonde I met was your roommate, she said something about her new house."
"Oh!" Get it together, Steele, you almost just blew it. "Great. All settled in. So, how did you get hooked up with Chr, um, Sir?" Sick. I feel sick.
"The usual way. I'd been trying to find a good Dom for almost a year, I was sick of the club scene and wanted something steady but they all were either disgusting or didn't get my blood going so I saved up my pennies and went to Elena, passed her test and then waited to get hooked up. It didn't take too long but when she told me I could potentially land The Christian Grey, I took out a loan and did exactly what she told me to do. The rest is history."
I'm confused, I thought he paid Elena.
"Why did you take out a loan?" Her head cocks to the side and then straightens to blow on her tea, sipping it before answering.
"So that I could contract with Sir. Your intermediary didn't ask for anything? At all?" She lets out a low whistle and shakes her head. "You got lucky, I had to pay her five thousand to find me someone, five thousand to get the dossier on Sir and another twenty five thousand when he contracted me." Dossier? She's handing out his dossier without NDA's and contracts?
"Did all of you have to do that? Did all of you use Elena?"
"Of course, there was no other way to get to him. Everyone knew she was the only one who had a direct line to 'the best Dom' and that ultimately she was the one who chose who went to him." She air quotes the part about the best Dom, stopping to take a bite of her scone.
"But why would you pay her so much money? Twenty five grand is a lot!" The first sign of irritation crosses her face but she gets it in check and takes a deep breath.
"Because he's the richest guy in the lifestyle on the West Coast and if he signed you, you're sure to make that money back plus some. Not that I'm a gold digger but I'm not an idiot either. I was looking for a Dom, he's the best and I can gain financially. It was a sound investment. The car alone covered the initial outlay but if that didn't sell you, once Elena showed you his picture and let you read from her diary on him, you want to contract with him."
"Diary?" If it's what I think it is I'm going to be sick. She pauses and scans my face which I morph into indifferent as quickly as I can.
"You know, his activity log or whatever you want to call it. Every two weeks we'd sit down with Elena, tell her what the last few sessions entailed, what toys were used, what his mood was like. That was part of the deal between them. She'd go over the details so he wouldn't have to."
"Maybe I don't understand because I haven't spoken with Elena but why not just talk to him directly?"
"From my understanding that's the way he wanted it. Less involvement and emotional mess that way I guess. She told me and the other girls that she was the one that trained him after having him as a sub and that he still considered her his mentor. I admit it was unorthodox but it seemed to work." Now I may not know exactly how his relationships worked but I'm damn sure he didn't want them telling Elena anything let alone what they did together and I'm certain he doesn't want his relationship with her being public knowledge either.
"Does your arrangement not work that way with Sir?"
"No, it doesn't. Lillian can I ask that you keep this conversation between us private? I'm sure one day I'll sit down with Ms. Lincoln but until then, I'd really like for this to be kept between us." In an instant her guard is up but she doesn't seem upset, just a bit suspect.
"Did he and Elena have a falling out? She has been a bit…skiddish and unusually bitchy lately."
"I'm not entirely sure what happened between them but no, he doesn't utilize her or her services anymore. Does she have other clients that she does this for or was Sir the only one?" I need to wash my mouth out with soap when I'm finished here. Sir my ass.
She blinks three times. "Of course, that's the core of her business model. I know she's got clients all over the globe, I'm surprised you've not been exposed to her yet." She puts her mug down and takes a good long look at me. "Or are you new to the lifestyle? She couldn't figure it out, I think that's why she was so adamant about me reaching out to you. I think she was so afraid you'd fail him." Oh yea, that's what it was. Sure. Mmmhmm.
"You got me! I'm new to the whole thing." I give a light chuckle and shrug.
"Ah, that explains a lot. Well, I don't know if you have someone who can help you connect with good Doms but Elena wanted to make sure that you at least knew that she could help once your time with Sir is over." Her hand fiddles with the stem of her mug, her eyes downcast.
"Can I ask you something? It's quite personal."
"OK." I answer slowly.
"You're not actually pregnant are you?" I can't help it, I burst out in a laugh, clutching my hand to my heart, rocking back and forth. I had actually forgotten about that rumor; not hard to do when there are so many other ones to take it's place.
"Oh god no. No no no. We, I mean, Sir, has just decided not to engage the press on any level so he's ignoring it. Can I ask you a question now?"
"Sure."
"How did you become a sub? I know it's personal but I always wonder how we end up the way we do." Surprisingly she doesn't seem put out at all by the question. Instead she smiles and holds her hands out as if to accept a gift.
"I like rough sex! I know the outside world expects that we all had some sort of traumatic abuse or some horrific introduction to sex but we both know that's just not the case most of the time. For me, I liked sex from day one but it never got me going like other girls I knew. And then I dated this guy my freshman year of college. He was actually a junior professor and he introduced me to kink and eventually to BDSM. I'm telling you, I got the big deal after those first few sessions. It was what I'd been missing so I just embraced it. What about you?"
"Oh, you know, same sort of thing. What about the other girls?" She shrugs.
"Mostly the same, just our preference. A few of the girls are in really stressful jobs and are always making decisions that have far reaching consequences. I think for them, this offers them a true reprieve from the weight of that responsibility. It's their time to allow someone else to have the control and make the decisions while still having a good time, you know?"
I nod because I can understand that. After my experience in the playroom, where all I had to do was enjoy and shut my brain off, I can absolutely see the appeal in that.
"And you've had other Doms? I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry I just, like you said, I'm just kind of new to all of this and…" Her warm hand pats mine in friendship and it saddens me. I'm lying to this girl. I like this girl.
"I have. Sir was the best, without question. Always respectful, always fair, always generous and cautious. I hate to tell you but you'll never have another Dom as good as he is so enjoy it while you can." Please, no more talk that eludes to them together.
"Lillian, do you work for Elena?"
"Oh god no. I help her out with the website and sit down with new girls, much like yourself, to show them the ropes and to help get them acclimated but I'm far too busy to take on more than that."
"Would you consider Elena your friend?" This question gives her pause, her chin slowly dropping to her chest.
"Not a friend, no. An acquaintance with whom I share similar tastes with. Why?" I can almost hear Christian and Taylor screaming at me to shut up but I trust this woman.
"Just curious. The whole thing is so fascinating to me and you're the first person I've really been able to sit with and talk to about it all." Not a lie. "How does it work? You said she has clients?" I rush to add, "I don't have an intermediary so...I should...understand what I need to do for that kind of stuff." She seems completely unaffected by this stammering false admission.
"It's really quite simple really. Once a Dom meets certain standards and criteria, they pay Elena to find them a submissive that fits their preference and can agree to their limits or lack there of. On the submissive side it's a bit more complicated but we're there to please our Dom so it requires us being a bit more flexible on certain things."
"So you pay her a fee to find you a Dom?"
"Well, you pay a fee to get on her roster. When a Dom shows interest in you they get in touch with Elena who sets up the meeting. If the match is a good one, she receives payment from the Dom."
"But with Sir it was different?"
"Yes. She was particularly aggressive when it came to him. Once we paid the fee to get on her roster, certain girls were then told that there was an extremely wealthy, young, experienced Dom. At that point we could choose to pay an additional fee for a folder of information on him. If we were interested, and everyone who read about him was, then she reached out to him with our information. Of course, if he requested a meeting we had to act as if we didn't know anything about him. If he chose us, we paid a 'finders fee' as Elena called it."
"Isn't that illegal? Doesn't that make her a madame?" Lillian looks offended. Shit!
"It's not legal since the contracts clearly state that sex is involved but I wouldn't go so far as to call her a madame." Sawyer is staring at me to wrap this up. Only Taylor and Christian have receivers to listen to my conversation but Sawyer can hear the two men in his ear piece and I'm sure they're yelling at him since I've gone off script a few times now. He puts the paper down and scratches his neck, my cue to end this.
"Were there ever women who read his profile that he didn't end up contracting with?"
"Oh I'm sure there were. He's without question the most sought after Dom on the West Coast. Probably even further than that. I know a few girls who were willing to relocate to be with him."
"So...they know him by name?" She shakes her head and finishes her scone.
"Oh god, no. He's got a reputation but very few people know who he is. I can speak for all of us when I say that we have all honored our NDA's outside of our little circle." She looks at me softly then, a sad smile playing on her face. "There was something about him that made each of us want to protect him." I know exactly what she means. "To be honest, now that he's in the public eye more, it'll be easier for someone to make the connection but most people in the life aren't going to sell anyone out. If anything they'll protect him."
I have to know. "What was in the dossier if you don't mind me asking?" Her hesitation is obvious but she relents and leans back, taking me in and pinning my eyes to hers.
"His picture. A few of them actually. A few head shots and then two of him without a shirt on. No sex or anything. His hard and soft limits, his contract requirements. That stuff just gave us a better idea of how to interview with him. Then of course there were details on past sessions and recommendations from previous subs. No names of course, just girls he'd spent time with at clubs but it was obvious they were talking about him." Visions of my Christian in a BDSM club assault me, the bitter acid of my coffee threatening to make a repeat.
My Christian. Mine. Not the clubs, not Elena's, not his subs, mine. Instead of feeling rage towards him, I feel sadness for the life he used to lead. Lonely, isolated, bleak. Focus and stay in the present, Steele.
"Nothing personal?"
"A few things. A brief overview on his adoption and each member of his family, a list of charities he supported, some of his favorite things. Pretty much anything you found on the website."
Sawyer is all but clawing at his neck now to get my attention.
"Lillian, I'm sorry, I need to get back to my office. Thank you so much for sitting down with me and talking to me. It's been a bit of an ordeal to try and navigate some of this stuff and I'm sincerely grateful for your help."
"Anytime. I'm sorry you're not able to attend our little get together on the 10th of September." What? My birthday? A get together? Out of the corner of my eye I see Sawyer press his ear piece and then look right at me. Got it, another thing Christian clearly forgot to tell me about. Mother fucker.
"I'd love to get together again if you're available. I have so many questions and no one to ask them to."
"Of course! I'd love to! Call me on Monday and we'll pick a time, maybe we can get a real meal this time too." She reaches over the table and hugs me. Actually hugs me and I hug her back. If Sawyer wasn't on the verge of a nervous breakdown before, he is now.
"I...can I ask a favor of you?" She nods, eyes wide and innocent. "It's really important to me that our meeting up is kept between just the two of us for now. I would hate to ruin things with...Sir." Gag. Gag. Gag. "Would you mind not telling anyone about us meeting up? I'm having a hard enough time with the press and all and I'd really appreciate a bit more time to adapt."
"No problem, Ana. The girls are looking forward to meeting you one day but nobody is going to press the issue. I won't mention our get togethers until you're ready. It was great to get to sit and talk to you. Again, I'm so sorry it took me so long to get a hold of you. I should have jumped on it when Elena gave me your information but I was swamped at work and by the time I could, you were near impossible to get in touch with. No harm though, you seem to have managed better than any of us."
She gives me a little giggle and I smile in spite of myself. I like this woman. Damn it, I actually like her.
"Take care, I'll speak with you soon." Outside we part ways and I walk the one block as instructed with Taylor following three feet behind me. The SUV door opens and Christian pulls me in, crushing me to his chest and then pulling me away to inspect me.
"I'm fine! Geesh, she didn't do anything to me! She was nice. In another universe I could be friends with her." He snorts, reaches his hand into the dip of my grey sheath dress and rips the wire off of my chest, tossing it onto the front seat for Taylor. "Ouch!"
"Over my dead body are you going to be friends. We'll get what we can from her, use her influence to get what we need and then go back to our little bubble as Flynn calls it. Are you ok? Be honest, I need you to be honest with me right now."
"Christian. I'm fine. I think we should pursue this more though. She knows a lot about how Elena runs things but I didn't want to keep pressing her, I was afraid she'd stop talking." He grunts and runs his hands over his face and hair, huffing and staring out the window. What the hell is his problem?
"Pursue this more? You mean get together with her again? What the fuck was that by the way? You went totally off script and didn't ask half the questions you were supposed to."
"Because that wouldn't have been a dead give away or anything! Hello Lillian, nice to meet you. Do you know if Elena Lincoln is engaged in any illegal activity that includes underage boys? Do you know anything about a woman that *gasp* somehow I know about even though I have no relationship with her, named Pamela? What is Pamela's role and connection to Ms. Lincoln?" I scoff and look out my own window. "Yeah, sure, that would have been genius."
Taylor is in the front seat, going as fast as he can to GEH and staying silent. I refuse to look at Christian but I can feel him seething next to me. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence I exhale slowly and reach for his hand. My heart lurches when I find it, just a centimeter away from my leg, palm up, waiting.
"I'm sorry." I whisper, weaving my fingers with his. He's watching me with sad eyes that are filled with anxiety and fear. "Baby, trust me. I want this for you, for us so much. I'm not looking to be friends with her but I know she can be a bigger help to us. Please." He hits the privacy screen, drops my hand and covers his eyes with the balls of his hands, pressing hard and yelling in frustration.
"How? How did it come down to this?" His entire body is as tight as a trip wire, tension radiating off of him in waves.
He's ashamed. Oh my god, he's ashamed that he has to ask for help. The revelation freezes me to my seat. A moment later, maybe two I reach out with tentative fingers and brush over his side gently. He's still as stone, his hands continuing to press against his face, his breathing ragged.
"Christian. At the risk of sounding cheesy, I'm grateful it's come down to this. I know that sounds insane to you but I see this as us working together as a team. I want to be a part of this, I want to experience all of life with you. The ups, the downs, the times in between. I think it's amazing, such an amazing feat that you're doing this." His hands drops but his eyes remain closed.
"Amazing?" He spits out.
"Yes, amazing. So many people out there would never have the courage to go after someone so vile. They'd never find the strength to fight back and to right a wrong the way you are. It takes a serious set of balls to know when to get other people involved and ask for help. I'm so fucking proud of you for being strong enough to do it."
One corner of his mouth turns up and one thumb begins to tap on the side of his leg.
"You said fucking." Tortured and humorous gray eyes swing to mine, capturing my breath with one smirk. The things this man can do to me is embarassing.
"I'm proud. As fuck." He smiles big, leaning over and wrapping his arms around me where he stays for the rest of the short ride to GEH.
"Show me. Later tonight I want you to show me how proud you are of me." My teeth sink into my bottom lip on habit while the now familiar tingling in my groin starts up. "Anastasia. You're biting that lip again."
Taylor raps on the window pulling us out of our little tete-a-tete. Christian groans and reaches for the door, pushing it open and pulling me out in one smooth move. In the elevator I remain pressed against him but with Taylor standing a foot away, we refrain, barely, from tearing each other's clothes off.
I'm not surprised to see Welch sitting in the waiting area outside. I'm getting used to people knowing my day to day business, a thought that both unsettles and placates me. Get used to it, Steele. This is how it will be forever. Andrea hustles over and takes my bag from me to deposit in my office. With an efficiency I still find remarkable she hands both Christian and I piping hot coffees, just the way we like them, and reminds him of his next meeting in five minutes.
Efficiency being the GEH model, Welch launches into his monologue the second the door clicks shut to Christian's office. I haven't even sat down yet and the three of them are huddled around the conference table looking at pictures of Lillian walking into the coffee shop.
"I listened to the tape, I think we've got some good information to start with. It comes as no surprise that she's running the legal equivalent of an escort service and since sex is involved, she could be charged with operating a prostitution ring. We're going to need more than third party conversations to get the Feds to look into it though. We need someone to get their hands on the books if they can, or an address book, or a computer file or something. Where is she running it out of? How many people are involved? What are the age requirements?"
"If the Feds do investigate, what will they uncover about Mr. Grey?" Taylor asks the million dollar question. Welch answers with a shrug before pulling a toothpick from his pocket.
"Without the books and an address book, we have no idea. The bigger question are the photos. She's threatened you with them before and we know she still uses pictures since we have recent ones of the unknown boy. It doesn't matter if there is no record of your involvement, one picture, just one would out you more than any financial records ever could."
Stone cold dread lands heavy in my gut. There is no escape from this for him if the rest of the world finds out. To put her away, to effectively remove the one weak link in his chain of secrets would forever change the rest of his life. His ex-subs aren't a threat, they all seem like normal women who have moved on with their life and harbor no ill will towards him. His family will only ever respect his wishes for this to remain private and his security team is bound by iron clad NDA's.
"What about sending someone in to break into her safe? Christian obviously knows the combo and where it is. They can clear all that shit out and then we nail her."
Welch shakes his head at me. "Too risky. We need to get someone into her inner circle. Someone who could pass themselves off as having high ranking connections to people who she deems as profitable. And even then we'd need someone from the inside to get us an introduction. She hasn't operated this long and this quietly by being foolish."
"We can use Lillian. I'm already establishing a relationship with her, we can start with that." Taylor stands and crosses his arms over his enormous chest, looking down at me while he works something out in his head. Christian just slams his hand on the table and walks to the window to stare out into the sky.
"It's the best option, Sir. It doesn't appear that Lillian is close enough to gain access to sensitive information but she is in a position to place someone who can." Inside my chest my heart beats as fast as a jack hammer. What started out as a small undercover fact seeking mission has just now exploded into a full on infiltration and take down.
"I'm not having Ana sit down with her again so figure something else out. Hire someone to rob her house for all I care."
"Sir, all due respect, in 25 minutes Ms. Steele was able to gather more usable information than we have in almost six months. My suggestion is that they meet again on Monday and we get more out of her."
"And how do we know she won't tip off Elena? Run to her and tell her that she met with Ana? That alone will raise the flag." He's looking at Welch but I'm the one who answers.
"She said she wouldn't. She won't say anything to anyone."
"Not to mention that the IRS showed up at her main office about an hour ago. She's been busy preparing for the audit and now that they're there, she'll be busy placating them and dealing with it." Welch offers and I have to literally hold onto the corner of the table so I that don't start jumping up and down with glee. Christian seems much less thrilled.
"According to Tony they're not going to find much."
"No, but it will take them a good two weeks to figure that out, probably more. Her time will be spent dealing with the auditor, of that I'm sure. In the meantime, we keep working on persuading the FTC to look into the identity thefts and we find someone we can use to get inside."
Christian whirls around, his suit jacket flaring behind him and strides back to the table.
"Where are we on that? Have you heard anything from the FTC?" Welch slowly shakes his head and amazingly, Christian doesn't totally lose it. Instead he dismisses the men, picks me up, walks to the couch and sits.
"I need to be inside of you right now. Can I please do that?" He doesn't move but I can feel him grow hard underneath me. With feather light kisses I run my lips down his neck, over his chin, up to his mouth and hover there.
"I thought you had a meeting." And like clockwork Andrea chimes in on the intercom announcing his next appointment. He deflates and gruffly yells at her that he'll be one minute.
"Will you be in your office all day?" I nod, my lips still just brushing over his. "I'll be finished here in 45 minutes." I nod once more and stand, adjusting my dress and then walking backwards towards the door, my fingers waving a seductive goodbye. How he goes from anxious to pained to pissed to horny in the time frame that he does I'll never understand.
CPOV
One more second in that car waiting for Ana to come out, knowing that she was hearing things that would upset her was more than I could take. Flynn thinks it's foolish for me to be listening in and I agree with him but I have to know what she hears. I have to stem any damage immediately instead of waiting for it to fester and blow up. I cannot, absolutely cannot have Ana hurt.
Elena running a BDSM escort service came as no real surprise to me. I figured those accounts in Walla Walla were somehow related to that but what really threw me for a loop and knocked the wind out of me was finding out that she had sold information about me. She sold me as if I were hers to use, hers to market. Nothing more than a commodity. And I played right into it, taking on the subs she hand picked, purchasing the jewelry she suggested. The red Audi's? All her idea. I didn't even think to question why I should buy them a car, I just did it because she told me to. And it was all part of her 'incentive' plan she sold to them.
And then to find out she gave information out before NDA's were signed? Absolute horror. How many women out there know my secret? How many have copies of this so called dossier that they can, at any time, sell to the press? In the car I went through each interview I could remember. She did her job well, by the time I met with one of these women it was pretty much a done deal. In fact, I can't remember one that I didn't sign on so that should eliminate scorned rejects. A small consolation I guess.
Shit, Shayla or Shana or Shelby.
"Taylor!" When he appears a few seconds later I stand, my hand pulling at my hair until it hurts. "That sub, the one Elena sent to me Escala right after Ana had been attacked? What do we know about her?"
He looks momentarily caught off guard but then he looks up and attempts to remember our interaction.
"We never did anything past having her sign the NDA before she got kicked out." Sweet fucking relief.
"That's right, she did sign an NDA. Thank Christ. Can you think of any girl I interviewed with and didn't contract with?" Again he looks up and shakes his head after a long minute.
"No, Sir, I can't." One bullet dodged.
"Thank you." He turns to go. "And Taylor, thank you for doing such a good job." My next email will be to Debra in HR to give him a raise.
Elena has always been able to make me feel exposed in a way that was uncomfortable. Be it bound; naked and gagged on the whipping post or with subtle words said quietly to remind me of what I've done, she had effectively kept me vulnerable to her. I won't say I trusted her, now that I know what real trust is, what I had with her wasn't even close. But there was a sense of safety. She'd never expose my secret, she'd always guard me and cover for me. Except now I've learned that that wasn't true. The blow severs any remaining obligation I felt towards her. I admit I struggled from time to time with the idea of putting her behind bars but now that I know what she did to me, I feel nothing but hatred.
Philip Somethingorother drones on about the environmental fall out from my ship currently being hauled out of the Sea of Japan. So far the spill has been easily contained and the clean up efforts are beyond what is necessary but should the media get wind of this, it would be devastating. No matter how responsible I've been, no matter how concerted and thorough my clean up efforts, there would be a major backlash and what is currently a $550k problem will overnight turn into a three million dollar debacle.
I should be listening, I should care. I usually do, responsible business is part of my whole moral code but I can think of one thing. Getting inside Anastasia.
Fuck Dr. Flynn, fuck Dr. Fischer. I need the connection to her. I could sit with Flynn all day and pay $450 an hour to work out the information I learned this morning. Or I could spend ten minutes between the legs of the one person on earth who really knows me and still loves me and believes that I'm good. To me, it's a no brainer.
"Mr..." without skipping a beat I glance at the online calendar to find his name, "Murray, thank you for the update. If you would please extend my gratitude to both governments, I'd appreciate it. I'm sure they know as well as I do what kind of money and how many jobs are on the line should this information get out. If you're in need of additional funds to keep people on the shoreline quiet, please contact Burt Whalen in my legal department. Now if you'll excuse me, there's somewhere I have to be right now." So get out.
I'm surprised to see Ana waiting at reception when he walks out but she just smiles, walks past me and waits for me to shut the door. In less than a heartbeat I've got her in my arms, panties a distant memory somewhere on the other side of the room in a shredded heap, and her legs wrapped around my waist.
"My desk. I want you on my desk." I pant, struggling to maintain balance as she unzips my pants while I walk. The desk is covered with papers all organized into neat piles so that I can breeze through them. I don't give a fuck. White papers float around us and onto the floor, the last thing on my mind when her heat opens for me and pulls me in.
Whether it's the fact that we didn't have sex this morning or the overwhelming emotions churning through us I don't know but within a minute I've unloaded into her, pulling her hips as tightly against me as I can and biting down on her exposed shoulder to stop from yelling. She tries to pull away to get down and clean herself up but I hold her down and use my own cum as lube while I rub her clit fast and hard, an orgasm ripping through her just seconds later that has her boneless and sweaty.
"I can't go to London without you, Ana. It's too long of a trip. Come with me, please." One hand reaches back and searches for a tissue to wipe up our mess but I beat her to it and use one of my handkerchief's, grinning at how flushed she gets after sex. I love having that effect on her body.
"Huh. That may be the first time I've seen someone use a handkerchief. Ever. You're going to throw it away, right?" I just laugh and toss it in the garbage next to my desk to appease her. She'll let me tie her up but she won't let the housekeeper wash her dirty clothes. Once we're zipped up and presentable again she sits on my lap, stroking my hair back and cupping one side of my face.
"I can't go to London with you, Christian. I don't want to be away from you either but I have to be here and run my business and you need to run yours. I've got some ideas on how to make it a bit easier for you but we need to get used to this. Being apart is going to happen, let's figure out how to make it tolerable."
"Tolerable is having you waiting at the hotel for me instead of halfway across the world." I nip at her bottom lip, pulling it from between her teeth. "Mmm, chocolate. This gloss might be my favorite so far." Another nip and my cock starts to spring back to life.
"I need to get back to work but we can continue this later. Say...seven o'clock. My place." Too cute.
"Seven thirty and you've got a date. I've got Flynn at six again." She stands and leans down to kiss my forehead.
"I'm happy to hear that. I thought I was going to have to start charging $450 each time you had a bad day." Cathartic laughter erupts from my chest. How she brings light into such darkness always astounds me.
"Baby, you sell yourself short, I'd pay top dollar for the therapy between your legs!"
Authors note: Before some of you go postal worrying about Lillian, let me assure you that she is a hero in this story. I know it's easy to villanize the ex-subs but these were just women who enjoyed a different kind of sex. I'm sure there are some crazy women out there in this lifestyle, same as there are crazy women in 'normal' sexual lifestyles but you won't read about crazy subs in S&S.
And finally, I am drowning in work over here. My sister is about to have a baby as is my closest friend (and both want me in the delivery room!) and I've got three sick kids so again, I promise to update as often as I can but real life is overwhelming right now. I give you my word that I will not abandon this story. In fact, I plan to update in the next four days.