Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Stephanie Meyers does. I don't own the werecats. Rachel Vincent does. The werecat characters come from the Shifter Series: Stray, Rogue, and Pride.
A/N: This story has been adopted from Darkdefender89. Thank you.
A/N: There are some…spoilers…in this chapter for the third book of Vincent's werecat series
Bella
I really didn't know what was happening. It was all a blur. Everything was rushing past me. Things were zipping by me so fast, that even if I wanted to catch it. I couldn't.
The last thing I remembered was Edward pouncing on me. I was in a lot of pain and was laying in the backseat of someone's car. Edward's, probably. Pain is something that I was used to. Pain, I can deal with. Pain is a part of who I am. There was a burning sensation was spreading through my veins. A part of me is aware of an intense, biting pain. It is a different sort of pain than the pain that comes when my bones shift and my jaws elongate, but all the same it has a similar feel to it. Whatever is happening to my body, it is my instincts telling me where I am now. This is similar to the point in the werecat shift, where it is too late to turn back.
I should have blamed him. I should be angry, anything. To tell the truth, I was more concerned about the fact that I had scratched Edward. New research says that you have to have one recessive gene in order to become a stray. There is a lot of strays in the world and the research is new. But not everyone believed it. As for me, I didn't know what to believe.
I want to be angry at Edward. I really do, but I can't. It's not even that I was dazzled by him on my first day at Forks High school. Although that is true, I was. The pain, I can take, but it is the guilt that is exploding inside my heart. It is burning a hole in my soul.
I want to believe that Edward is different. He was able to tackle me. And I was in my cat form. Surly there is something about him that will make him invulnerable to stray fever. Please. When scratched by a werecat, one of two things happens: you die, or you transform into a stray werecat.
I don't want Edward to die. Even if he is already different. I don't think he would want this. I am letting my mind wander. It is hard to keep my attention The fire burning through my veins is intensifying.
Just like Faythe, I have now committed two out of the three capital crimes. The territorial council was not lead by our father at that time. Since Faythe was his daughter. The council had a hard time believing that Faythe had killed Andrew in self-defense. They gave in and gave her a warning and community service. Meaning, basically she was to be reinstated as one of her father's enforcers, except without pay. That pearl of hope came with a price: Malone ordered our father to have Marc exiled.
Malone, who now is trying to take over my father's role as the leader, forced my father to choose between my sister and her boyfriend. Obviously, since Faythe is still alive, he chose Faythe. He can't go back on his word. Because there is a hearing sometime in the near future. Malone hopes to usurp Gregory's power. Gregory is my father.
And here I am, in the backseat of Edward's car. I was naked. Someone had placed a blanket or something over me.
I could sense another female in the back seat with me. "You can scream if you want," she whispered to me. "But it will not help. It is better to keep your mind occupied, than to think about burning." Two or three times I felt her pull the blanket back over my shoulder. She knew what was happening. Like she had been through this before.
He struck me as strange boy from the beginning. For some reason I was drawn to him. There was something about him. There was something just underneath the skin. This was something I cannot even begin to comprehend. I was enticed. I don't know how I feel, outside of the obvious.
I don't know what Edward is. He bit me, I realized. He bit me. He must have thought I was an animal. I was in cat form, after all. What kind of creature looks like a human but bites people? Well, let's say, bites living things. Even in pain, my brain refused to turn off. Then another thought flashed through my mind, Vampire.
That's the only thing I can think of, and although it should make me shiver, it doesn't. I don't care. I'm a were-cat. As the thought course through my head, I panic. I love being a werecat! My thoughts screamed. This is my life, my fuel, my passion, my purpose. Why am I here, in Forks, while Malone is attempting to tear my family apart? What was I thinking? And why in the hell did it take a crisis for me to realize this? I ran away from my responsibilities. Now Karma has come back to bit me in the ass. Well, the neck.
I have to still be a cat. My body is changing, that I can tell. Oh God, the pain! I am not stupid. I can make deductions. If Edward is a vampire, and he bit me, then the only logical conclusion is that I am turning into a vampire. I pray to God that I can still shift into my cat form after this. I think I would be devastated if I couldn't. In fact, I know that I would be devastated.
I am jumping to conclusions, though. I might be wrong. Maybe he is just rabid. Yeah, right.
I can feel the car pulling up into a long driveway. When we come to a stop, I can vaguely hear people shuffling their feet. A front door is opening, then a slamming noise. I hear a high, sweet, sing-song voice of a female. The voice is familiar, but I can't place it. It is sharp contrast to Edward's velvety voice. Both sound so lovely.
Gripped in the throes of the pain, I couldn't quite decipher the words of the people around me. I assumed they must be the Cullens that were speaking. I heard the rumble of the car engine slowly die down. I can hear Edward twisting his keys and pulling them out of the ignition. The door opened. Someone walked over,Edward, I think. Feels like Edward. He is lifting me out of the back of the car. I curl my body up against him as he pulls me out. His sent and his touch help to calm me. I hear whispering something to me. He's sorry. This was not suppose to happen. I hear him promise me something, but I can't make out what he is saying.
"Do you have the clothes, Alice?" Edward asked. I hear him say to someone else. My eyes don't want to open. I vaguely recognized her from Forks High School, but the only Cullen I ever paid attention to was Edward. Besides, it had been what, a week since I started at Forks High School?
"I have them, but we should take Bella inside first," I hear Alice say.
Edward
"I have them, but we should take Bella inside first," Alice said. I don't think she would want to change her clothes outside, Alice thought. I grimaced. This was my fault. Don't blame yourself, how could you know? Why couldn't I see her? I should have seen this, Edward. I could have prevented it…it's my fault, Alice thought.
"Alice, please don't blame yourself," I said, "you weren't the one that bit her." I am agitated but touched that Alice would attempt to take the blame. I wasn't going to allow her to ease my burden, however. It was me who tasted her blood. It was me, only me, who bit her. What was the point of saving her from a car accident and then almost kill her the very next day? The logical part of my brain was happy to see a few questions answered about the beautiful girl. But that came at a high price. Her life.
Alice opened the door and I carried her inside. I was about lay her down on the sofa in the living when Alice stopped me. You should put her in the Study. Someone will come looking for her. Do you want her to be found in the living room? Point well taken.
Alice ran up to her room. She returned downstairs with a pair of yoga style sweatpants and a T-shirt. I didn't know Alice had a pair of sweatpants. Only because I want her to be as comfortable as possible during the change, Alice thought. I can't see her future but I can sense that we're going to be best friends! What had Alice seen?
I watched as Alice carried Bella to her bathroom. She kept the blanket wrapped around Bella's body. She dressed Bella then gently placed her back in my arms. Bella gripped my shirt and pressed herself against my chest.
The study was on the second floor. Carlisle was home today. The sun had come so we all were playing hooky today. Carlisle is following behind me. I can hear Emmett telling him how he found me and her.
The furniture in the study is done in a soft reddish-brown leather. There is couch and 2 matching square chairs. I lay her down on the soft leather couch. She whimpers when I pull away. I feel an instant gravitation towards Bella's side. Someone is tugging at my hand. Carlisle, he tells me to move a chair over a sit by her. She needs you to sit closer to her, touch her, and talk to her. He thinks of Esme briefly.
I do as he tells me. He has sat with everyone of us that he has changed. Carlisle is the sire of Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, and myself. Bella's eyes have opened. She is searching the room. I feel her eyes rest upon me. I looked into Bella's eyes and I see in her everything that I am not. I see everything that I knows I never can be. This is who I am now, your sire. A monster. I have my place with my family, but at the same time I feel alone.
I can feel her heated gaze when she stares at me. What does she see when she looks at me? I have destroyed her. Bella closed her eyes. I hope that she is asleep. I find it is a bittersweet solace that Bella has gone sleep. Maybe she can one last time. I want the pain to be hiding in some faraway place. Someplace where she doesn't have to feel it.
Unless she is dying, of course. She'll never know what's coming. To fall asleep and never wake up. What a sad, twisted way to go. Not everyone makes it through the transformation. I should just kill her now and put her out of her misery. That thought brought an instant of shearing pain ripping across my body.
I see Carlisle standing in the doorway watching me. Study me. The expression on his face spoke magnitudes, but in my minds eye I see everything. Centuries of loss and grief, beauty thrown away, all of his inner-turmoil poured into this one girl. The girl I destroyed. The one who is lying on the couch.
I feel something tugging at me. Briefly her hand reaches out pulls on my pants leg. I couldn't believe it. She was trying to reassure me, of all people. I smooth the hair out of her face. I can feel her sharp little finger nails digging into my leg. Go on little cat, whatever you need, just do it. Take it. I am as much yours, as you are mine.
Mine. A jolt of pure energy race through me. I'm having trouble moving and my breath feels labored. Carlisle noticed. He takes a seat in the matching leather chair on the other side of the couch. I feel something else. Something pulling at the emptiness. I have my own fears that is lurking inside of me.
Why am I not surprised? I look at my sire and arch an eyebrow at him. He has known me for damn near a century. He knows I'm asking him to continue. I met Esme ten years before I changed her. When I first met her, she had fallen out of a tree and broke her leg. Even then it was painful. She made my throat burn like I was a newborn again. I was confused, but instantly I was enamored with her. I moved the next week. I had never felt the urge to bite someone before, not like that. Ten years later, fate landed her in my lap again. Everyone thought she was dead. But her heart still beat and her blood still sang to me. Carlisle had never told me about that part.
Edward, Carlisle thought at me. He motioned with a single finger to his lips for me to stay quite. It is time for me to talk and you to listen son. I nodded. I don't feel the need to listen to the catcalls and wolf-whistles from the other children. I smile my thanks.
Nature didn't design us to have eternity by our selves. Forever is a long time to be alone. Some of us are very much in control of ourselves. Like you and I. So nature takes matters into her own hands. She made sure that vampires like you and I would sit up on take notice of our mates.
I let my gaze wondered over to the small broken goddess on the couch. I hated what I was. Now I've cursed her. Edward, Carlisle pulled my eyes back to him. When she wakes up, she will need you. You need to keep this relationship at a mentor level. At least until she knows what she feeling. Newborn vampires stay in state of confusion. She will feel sometime for you. But she maybe clueless as to what she is feeling. Be patient with her. Love her, teach her, but earn her respect. The only thing I can do is nod.
My arm is still stinging, but I pays no mind to it. Somewhere in the back of my mind, the pain lurks. It doesn't matter. Just add it to the burning in my throat. I will it to dissolve, only it doesn't. I see it as nothing. I push it out of my mind and quit paying attention. I know Carlisle said is true, but still, I bite her. It was my venom that was burning in her veins. I took her life from her. I feel my guilt tearing at me from the inside as I watch my angel drowning in pain that I am responsible for. It is pain that I caused.
"She'll be alright, you know," Alice said from behind Carlisle.
"How do you know?" I asked. Alice can't see Bella's future. We have went over this before. "I thought you couldn't see her," I said. I let my words hang in the air, like stale bread. "Her future, I mean," I said.
"I couldn't," Alice said.
"Couldn't, as in past tense?" I ask.
Alice nodded her head and then went to say more. "Her future's blurry now, but I can see it," she told me. She is doing Chinese algebra in her head now.
Why are you counting in Chinese? I want to ask, but thought better of it. If she was going to tell she would have done it already so I say don't say anything. I just sit at Bella's side watching her burn from the inside out. Silently, I hope that Alice is on to something. That Bella will be okay. I can't help but think that she will hate me. Even that's alright, as long as she's alive.
"She will be alright, son," Carlisle said. "You had no way of knowing, son. It's not your fault." But it is, it really is.
"Let me look at your arm," Carlisle said.
I can't find it myself to respond. Carlisle walked towards me, leaving a little space between us. "My arm is fine," I finally say. It isn't, I know it. Even marks and bites from a werewolf or another vampire will heal up. It will leave one hell of a scar, but it will heal with in a few minutes. An hour at the most. But look what I did to Bella. She is going through a far worse pain, why should it matter? It hardly seems fair to Bella.
"Alice, are you sure she will okay?" I hear Carlisle talking behind me. I sit rock still while he starts to poke and prod my arm. I feel catatonic. I hate myself for the event that has transpired here today.