A/N: Yay, I manage to post quickish for a change. :) Is it going to be a happy new year for Grissom and Sara or is hat going to spoil it? Hehehehe. I guess we will see. Thanks to calim for the beta (don't forget to breathe when it comes to Sara, lol) and please keep your thoughts coming. I need cheering up right now and your reviews will do that!

Chapter 152

Popping the last piece of veal into his mouth, Grissom chewed contentedly then wiped his mouth on his napkin.

"Good?" Sara asked, glancing to his plate to see it wiped clean.

The rancher nodded, dropping a hand to his stomach and leaning back with a sigh. He was so full. "Amazing," he answered. "A fabulous choice, my dear."

"Why thank you," she snickered, mopping up the last bit of her sauce with some corn bread.

"How was yours?"

"Delightful," she answered, holding out the bread to him. "Want to try?"

He shook his head. "I couldn't. Too much in my belly already."

Laughing, she dropped the bread into her mouth. "They have the best vegetables here and the cheese sauce…I wish I could bottle it and take it home."

"I'm happy you are so easily pleased," he said, reaching for his water.

"Not always," she said slyly and he gave her a raised eyebrow.

The clanging of a knife against glassware broke their conversation and everyone looked the captain's way as he stood, glass in hand.

"If I could have your attention," he asked after clearing his throat. "I'd just like to say a few words if I may…" Glancing to each person at the table he smiled then continued. "I would just like to thank everyone for their company. Christmas and New Years are very special times for both myself and Laura and we are very happy to have the family that we love around us. After all, family is what is most important and I think we have all learned that one way or the other in the last twelve months." Sara and Grissom exchanged a look and took each other's hand. "So, here's to family…" the captain continued, raising his glass, "…may we continue to prosper, love and respect each other…"

"Family…" everyone answered together, raising their own glasses.

Sara leaned into her husband, placing her head on his shoulder. "Why don't you say something?"

As she lifted her head, his eyes slowly found hers and he frowned. "Me?"

"Sure," she continued softly. "You are after all the newest member of the Sidle family and I think father would appreciate a few words from you."

His jaw worked from side to side. "I'm not good at speeches."

She smiled. "You'll be fine. I have faith in you."

He glanced around the table and everyone had begun chatting again. "I'd really rather not interrupt everyone again…" he said, looking back at her. "But I'll do you a deal."

"Oh?" she asked curiously, placing her hand over his and stroking his fingers. "What kind of deal?"

"I won't make a speech now but I promise I will say something tonight at the party."

Her smile grew. "A little more alcohol for a little more courage?"

Smacking his lips together, he grinned. "Maybe."

"All right," she agreed. "I'd never force you to do anything you didn't want to do though. It was just a suggestion but if you're happy with that then so I am."

"Yeah. I think I can manage it."

Leaning in she softly kissed his lips but upon hearing a throat being cleared they both glanced across the table to see Rose staring at them.

Feeling herself blush, Sara reached for her wine. "I guess this isn't an appropriate place for necking," she whispered, before sipping from the glass.

"We could stand on the table and give each other a big fat kiss to find out."

Thankful she had swallowed before her husband's comment, Sara laughed heartily. "I don't think that would be appreciated, honey."

"It would make for an interesting speech later though," he chuckled as he emptied the contents of his wine glass.

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Sara inhaled the crisp, cool air as she and her husband stepped from the restaurant, hand in hand. It had been a sunny day again and, even though it was still cold, it was nice not to have to contend with falling snow. But she was worried about Amelia who'd complained of stomach cramps and was now coming up behind them, William's arm wrapped about her waist for support. Nicolas followed holding Tyler's hand while Gregory carried Anna. Looking around, the little girl spotted something that made her smile.

"Candy!" she called, pointing across the street at the sweet treats in the General Store's window. Before Gregory could react, she'd pulled her hand free from his and was dashing toward street.

"Anna!" Amelia shouted in horror as her daughter hurtled towards the busy main street.

Grissom acted with lightning speed, releasing Sara's hand and hastened after the little girl. He managed to sweep her into his arms just before she stepped out in front of a passing carriage.

"No…no…little one," he said, holding her against his chest. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief to see her safely in the rancher's arms.

"Candy?" Anna questioned having no idea what she'd done wrong.

Smiling, Grissom spotted Amelia doing her best to rush towards him, William right by her side. "She's fine," he told them.

"I'm so sorry," Amelia apologized, wincing as another cramp kicked in. "The children aren't used to busy roads. We rarely ever leave the countryside so they don't know the dangers. But that was very naughty young lady…"

Anna's lower lip quivered and she bowed her head. "It's fine," Grissom said, bouncing Anna in his arms. "She's just overly enthusiastic for sweet treats."

Sara smiled at his care for the young girl and this side of him was what she was trying to get him to see. She knew he'd be an amazing father.

"Still…" William cut in, "…if you hadn't caught her…"

"But I did," Grissom answered, "so, don't be too hard on her. If she doesn't know then she can't help it. Maybe just teaching them what the dangers are may help for the future…"

Another cramp hit Amelia and she fell against her husband.

"I think it might be an idea to see the doctor before we head back to the house," William said with urgency, cupping his wife's cheek and she quickly nodded.

"Candy?" Anna asked.

"Mama isn't well, sweetheart," William told his daughter. "We need to see the doctor then get home."

The little girl pouted and dropped her head against Grissom's shoulder, surprising him when she cuddled into him.

The captain urged his older family members into the carriages and out of the cold now that the drama was over.

Sara stepped up to Amelia, placing an arm on her shoulder. "We can take the children to the store while you get sorted, if you'd like."

William and Amelia exchanged a look. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Grissom frowned at his wife who just smirked. "Absolutely," she replied. "It will save them being disappointed and, as you can see, they are comfortable with us so it's no bother."

"We can help, too," Nicolas said from behind, still holding onto Tyler's hand.

"Well…" William rubbed his chin. "What do you think, honey?"

Amelia managed a smile. "I think they'll be in good hands."

"All right then," William agreed. "But not too long. Be back before dark."

Sara smiled. "We can manage that," she answered, moving to her husband and running her hand through Anna's hair. "Shall we get you some candy?"

"Yes!" Anna shouted, patting Grissom on the chin.

Grissom's brow rose. "Then I guess we're going for candy…"

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Grissom held Anna's hand and Sara held Tyler's as they entered the store. Nicolas and Gregory brought up the rear as the clang of the shop bell informed the storekeeper new customers had arrived. Although, he didn't need to be informed. Even though the store was reasonably busy, Rory looked in the direction of his new customers, a smile finding his lips when he saw who it was. He whispered something to his assistant before approaching the group.

"Good afternoon," he greeted happily.

"Hello, Rory," Sara replied, as Gregory took Tyler's hand and the youngster wobbled towards the window, Nicolas following.

"So, to what do I owe this pleasure on such a celebratory day?" Rory asked.

"Candy!" Anna shouted.

Rory laughed. "Candy, huh?"

"Yes," Grissom clarified. "The children are in need of sugar..."

"I'm sure we can sort that out," Rory continued giving Anna a smile. "And may I say congratulations to you both on your marriage? The prefect couple…"

"Thank you," Sara replied sincerely.

He gave a nod and then held out his hands. "So what delights can I help you with? Anything in particular you would like?"

"Um…" Sara shrugged. "I'm not sure. How about we let them look and choose?"

"That could work," Grissom agreed.

"Follow me," Rory instructed, moving back towards the store counter. "And I can tell you what we have.

"Nicolas, Gregory!" Sara called. "Over here so Tyler can choose what he wants."

The group followed Rory back to the counter, Grissom picking up Anna so she could see the glass jars filled with sugary goodness.

"Up, up!" Tyler called seeing his sister being lifted into the air and Sara snickered, bending to pick him up.

"We have licorice, marshmallows…" Rory began, pointing to the jars on the shelves, "…candy cane…and over in the window we have chocolate, toffee, bonbons…"

"Licorice," Anna said, cutting him off.

Grissom smacked his lips together. "Well, that was easy." He looked to Tyler. "Maybe we should get the same for him?"

"Do you like licorice, Tyler?" Sara asked of the young boy who popped a finger into his mouth, a serious thinking look on his face.

"Yes, he does," Anna answered for her brother. "He always gets sticky," she laughed.

Snorting, Grissom pointed to the licorice. "We'll have ten pieces of that then."

"Ten?" Sara laughed.

His eyes flicked to her. "I gather you would like some and I'm pretty sure your ravenous cousins would also like a little something."

"Can we have chocolate?" Gregory pleaded. "We'd prefer chocolate."

Rolling her eyes, Sara smiled at Rory. "We'll take six licorice and two bars of chocolate please."

"Yes, Ma'am," he answered quickly, packing up their goodies into a bag and handing it over.

Grissom took the two bags and laughed as Anna tried to grab them. "You can have them in the carriage, all right?" After a seconds thought, the little girl nodded.

"Thank you, Rory," Sara said to the storekeeper. "Can you place these on my father's account please?"

"I sure can," he answered. "And I hope to see you again soon."

Everyone gave their thanks and headed back to the waiting carriage.

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As their carriage turned onto the road leading to the Grove's main house, Grissom smiled brightly at Anna. She'd just finished eating her licorice and had a sticky mess all around her mouth and on her hands. Tyler didn't look much better.

"I think they're going to need to be wiped down when we get back," Grissom told his wife.

She glanced down at Tyler in her lap and nodded. "I think you're right," she laughed then looked at her cousins. "At least you two have stayed clean."

Gregory narrowed his eyes at her, breaking off another piece of chocolate and popping it into his mouth. "I'm not five, Sara," he grumbled.

"No, you just act it sometimes," she responded as Grissom snickered.

"You're mean," he moaned.

"I hope Amelia is all right," Grissom said as they pulled up to the house.

Sara nodded. "Me, too. I'll check on her while you get the kids cleaned up."

His eyes shot to her. "Me?"

She tapped his knee. "Sure. The boys will help you. We can't give them back in this sticky mess."

Puffing out his cheeks as the carriage came to a stop, he leaned in closer to her. "I'm beginning to suspect ulterior motives for all this time you want me to spend with the children."

"Heaven forbid," she chided. "They are family, Gil. So be nice…"

Rolling his eyes, Grissom stepped out of the carriage and held his arms up to take Tyler from Sara.

"Everything all right?" William asked as he came down the steps and swept his son into his arms, laughing at the licorice around his mouth.

"Sticky, Papa…" Tyler said.

"Yes…I can see that," William responded, looking over at Anna as Grissom helped her from the carriage.

"Sorry…" Grissom apologized, placing Anna on the ground. "We were going to clean them up before you…"

"Don't be silly," William cut in. "Children and candy generally equal a mess. But as long as they are happy then I'm happy."

Smiling, Grissom turned to help his wife down, watching as she smoothed down her dress.

"I certainly think they are happy," Sara told him.

William bounced his son as he popped the remaining licorice into his mouth. "Is that nice?" he asked. Tyler nodded and smiled at his father.

"How's Amelia?" Sara asked, looping her arm through her husband's as Nicolas picked Anna up and swung her through the air making her giggle.

"She's all right," William answered as they made their way up the steps and towards the door. "She's resting in her room but we have a pretty good idea why she felt a little off."

"Oh?" Sara exchanged a quick glance with her husband. "Why?"

Stopping at the top of the steps, William faced them rubbing his chin. "She's um...possibly with child."

"Really?" Sara asked, surprise in her tone.

William nodded. "We suspected before the trip but weren't sure. That's why we didn't mention it but now with her symptoms, we're pretty positive."

Sara was suddenly unsure about how to feel. Yes, she was happy for them but a sudden feeling of longing hit her.

"Congratulations," she managed to say, trying to sound as positive as she could.

"I'll second that," Grissom added, giving William a healthy pat on the back.

"Thank you," William answered happily, opening the door and stepping inside. "And I guess we had better get you cleaned up, hadn't we?" he said to his son, placing him down to remove his coat. Nicolas did the same with Anna and started helping her with her tiny gloves.

"Gil will help you," Sara said, pulling off her scarf. "Won't you?"

Unbuttoning his coat, Grissom short her a stare then backed off, seeing a hint of unhappiness in her eyes. He swallowed. "Sure," he agreed but the look on her face now sent a pang of worry through him.

Giving him a weak smile, she pulled off her coat, handing it to a waiting servant. "I'm going to change," she said, squeezing his arm. "I'll see you when you're done helping William."

Before he could say anything she was already heading up the stairs and he frowned.

"Come on then you two…" William said once the children were free from their outer clothing. "Let's sort you out…"

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Once Grissom had helped William with the children and they'd gone back to their room, he hurried upstairs in search of his wife. Entering the bedroom he found her standing by the window, looking out over the estate. Hearing the door, she turned to face him, biting down on her lip as he approached with nothing but concern in his eyes.

"Want to tell me what's troubling you?" he asked, stopping in front of her.

"What makes you think something's troubling me?" she answered innocently, lowering her eyes to his tie and raising a hand to fiddle with it.

Feeling his finger under her chin, her head raised when he lifted with gentle pressure. "Because I can see it in your eyes and I'm no fool. No secrets from each other remember?"

"It's silly," she whispered, her head shaking. "I'm being silly. Just…forget about it. It will pass."

"Tell me…" he requested softly.

She sighed, looking deep into his eyes. "Do I really need to tell you?" she asked softly.

His teeth nipped his bottom lip but he managed a vague smile. "No…," he continued, running his hands up her back, "…but I'd rather you did in case I make a fool of myself by saying the wrong thing."

"Try me," she challenged. "Tell me what's on my mind? Show me how much you really know me…"

Carefully studying her expression, he swallowed. Her request was serious, he knew that and although the subject matter made him incredibly nervous, he'd promised they would readdress it. "Children," he said quietly. "Having Anna and Tyler here and now with Amelia's pregnancy…that's…um…" He frowned, not sure what to say next.

"Brought the topic of us having our own family back up?"

He nodded. "Something like that."

Unwrapping herself from him and taking a step back, she took his hands. "I know your fears, Gil, but…take the risks out of the equation. Do you want to be a father? Do you want us to have a family of our own?"

Taking a deep breath, he swallowed again, hard this time. His mouth opened but nothing came out.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you don't want a child with me. If you do that, I will respect your choice and I won't ever speak of it again."

"Sara…," he began, his eyes closing for the briefest of seconds, his hands clenching tighter to hers, "…if I lost you, it would kill me."

Pulling his right hand up, she held it to her heart. "You won't lose me," she ensured. "I have no intention of letting you go. A child is a miracle we make together and we bring up together. I understand what happened to your mother but that doesn't mean the same thing will happen to me."

"But it could…"

"You need to let it go," she said softly. "I did, now it's your turn. I trusted in you to take my demons away, you need to let me do the same. I won't leave you, Gil. I promise. Trust me and please give us a chance to do this."

He sighed. "Sara…you can't promise there won't be complications. Something like that is not in our control."

"I'm just trying to make it easier," she whispered.

"You really want a baby, don't you?"

"Only because I'm with you but this is something we have to do together. It can't be a one way street. You need to want it, too."

Pulling his hand free, he raised it to her cheek and her eyes closed at his gentle touch. "Do something for me?" he asked and her eyes opened.

"Anything."

"Just…give me a little time. A few months to get my head around it and enjoy us without having to worry about such a big change in our lives so soon."

Taking his hand she kissed the back of it. It wasn't exactly the answer she was hoping for but it was better than a no. "All right…"

"Thank you," he whispered.

Her hand slipped through his hair. "I love you very much," she told him. "You are a great man, Gilbert Grissom, and you need to realize that."

Now he smiled. "I'm so very glad you think so."

"Oh, I know so."

"Come here…" He pulled her into his arms again and they stayed like that for a while, just enjoying each other's comfort…

*** - "You have no idea how such an apprehension weighs on the sufferer's mind, and how difficult- how almost impossible- it is, for him to force himself to utter a word upon the topic that oppresses him."

*** - Extract taken from A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens