"Did you sleep well last night?" her mother's voice made her look up from her phone, as she walked towards the kitchen counter.
"Yes…No, I couldn't sleep." Emma answered honestly, receiving a sympathetic but understanding look from the brunette.
"When are you picking Henry up? I'm dying do see him!" Snow said.
"I'm not picking him up. Regina will bring him over at Granny's" the blonde replied.
"So you talked to her?"
"We texted"
"What are you, thirteen?!"
"Whats so wrong with texting?"
"Whats wrong is that you are avoiding talking to her and sooner or later you are going to have to talk to each other."
"I know that. I'm just not ready. I'm not sure I want to."
"Could have fooled me. You look miserable, sweetheart. It's quite obvious you miss her and its only been one night. You're not going to look or feel any better until you talk to her. Let her know where you two stand. For her sake, for yours"
Her mother was right, she hadn't stopped thinking about the brunette and how they'd left things. She had stayed awake, questions going through her mind. Why was she so mad at Regina? Would they be able to work it out? Her mind had drifted to their last moments together. To how she'd pulled away from the woman she'd promised to love always, no matter what just a few minutes prior. Regina's words replayed in her head. But you can't be with an evil queen who caused you and your parents so much pain. No! Emma had wanted to scream. She of all people should know how much Regina read into what people thought of her. She had lived all her life with people calling her evil and misunderstanding her and Emma had sworn to herself never to make her feel like she wasn't capable of being good, of doing good. What had she done!? Why hadn't she assured her of her love like she had done minutes before it all went to hell? She hadn't seen anything wrong with what she'd done until after her talk with her parents and until she had been lying in bed, tears falling down her face anew and her bed cold from the other woman's absence. Things had been so easy and different in New York. But Regina had disregarded all that just to give her the best. A complete family with loving parents. Problem was, even with her parents and Henry in her life, she didn't feel complete. She wasn't going to feel that without Regina. Regina was her family too. But she had messed up, she had hurt her like no one else had. The best thing would be to just stay away from her, so she wouldn't hurt her anymore.
"I…I can't" Emma replied, realizing she'd been silent for a while.
"Emma, I know you're scared but…"
"Scared? No, I'm not scared, I'm pissed, at her for destroying what we had. I know she did it for me but a big part of me wonders what would have happened if she didn't make me remember. Everything was perfect, with her, with Henry. For one year I didn't have to live with the what- ifs and the guilt of ever having given him up. For one year I was the mother I should have been to him. I had done right by him. But now, it's all a lie. Now, I know that it was all Regina. I was living her own memories, her own happy ending. She sacrificed all that for me and then ruined it all and I just…I'm so pissed at her for it. But mostly I'm pissed at myself. I'm angry and I'm mad. I'm mad that despite everything she's been through, despite everything she has sacrificed for the sake of others, for me and for Henry…some people will still look at her like she's evil and I hate that I did just that to her yesterday." She sniffed. Snow looked at her with confusion, prompting Emma to continue. "After I got my memories back yesterday, Regina asked me if the reason I didn't want to be with her was because of the evil queen thing, and do you know what I said?, nothing! I said I had to leave. I didn't tell her that I just needed time, I didn't tell her that I loved her no matter what. How do we come back from that? How will she ever trust me or the fact that her past will never be an issue between us should we continue dating, that's assuming she even wants anything to do with me."
"She loves you. Of course she wants to see you. Why don't you go talk to her? I'm sure she understands that you were in shock last night. But if you don't talk to her, she's going to keep thinking that you don't want her because of the evil queen thing. Go to her, let her know that you love her. That nothing's changed but you just need sometime for now. "
Emma sighed, "I have to go. I have to book rooms for us before Henry gets there."
"What are you going to tell him? This will just be some strange new place for him without his memories and you will be keeping him away from the only other person he knows here"
"I won't keep him away from Regina. He can spend all the time he wants with her."
"But he'll still ask questions"
"I know. I'll think of something"
"Okay" snow raised her hand in a mock surrender. There was clearly no way of reasoning with her stubborn daughter. Only she would decide when she was ready to talk to Regina and sought out their issues.
"See you at Granny's for dinner tonight?" the blonde asked, putting on her red leather jacket. "I can just tell Henry you and David are old friends or something"
"Sure" Snow smiled, tightly embracing the blonde. "Everything will be fine, honey" she kissed her hair.
"Thanks Mom" Emma whispered as she took one last look at her mother and walking out the door.
"Emma!" the brunette was infront of her sooner than she couldn't blink. "Its so good to see you!"
"Its good to see you too, Rubes. How are you?"
"Same old. Where is Henry?"
"Regina should be dropping him here any second now. Can I get a room before they get here?"
"Sure. But won't you be staying with your folks or Regi…?" Ruby suddenly kept quite, her eyes looking at something or someone behind the blonde, making Emma turn around out of curiosity.
Their eyes met and they both fell out of breath. They stared into each other's eyes as if searching for something they'd left there the last time they'd seen each other.
"Hey," Emma said first.
"Hey," Regina replied.
"Why are you two being all weird?" Henry asked. "And why didn't you come home last night?" he continued, oblivious to the sharp intake of air her blonde mother took at the mention of the name home.
Ignoring her son's inquisition, she turned shortly towards Ruby who had been standing quietly beside her. "Hey kid, this is my friend Ruby. She's gonna take you to our room, if it isn't too much to ask Rubes"
"No, its totally fine. I'll take that" Ruby said, pointing to Henry's suitcase.
"I'll bring mine up in a bit" Emma said.
"We are staying here?!" the boy exclaimed.
"Yes"
"But why? I thought we were going to stay at Regina's. That's why we came here, right?"
"We'll talk about it later kid, now go" earning a grunt from the boy before he crashed himself against the brunette.
"When will I see you? Will you come over?"
"Anytime you want. You know you always have room in my house and my life" Regina said, returning the boy's embrace and trying hard to keep her tears from falling.
"Okay," Henry reluctantly pulled away from the hug and gave her a quick wave, "bye"
"Bye" Regina said, turning and starting to head towards the door, Emma slowly falling behind her. "I drove your car here, I thought you might need it. Your suitcase is still in the trunk" Emma nodded.
The brunette kept walking after they stepped outside the diner, not sparing a second to look at the other woman. She was scared of seeing the confusion she'd seen on her face the other night. She couldn't handle any more of it. Being away from her and not knowing where things stood between them hurt. But she wasn't going to push her. She would give her all the space and time she needed. It was the least she could do. So she decided to walk away from the woman she loved, no matter how much it pained her.
"Regina, wait!" she heard the blonde call. Regina turned around slowly but hopeful.
"About Henry…" the blonde replied after a bit.
"Oh! Yeah. I meant what I said to him. He can see me whenever he wants while we work on getting him a portion too"
"Okay…How are you going to get home? I can drive you"
"There's no need. I'll be just fine walking…I kind of need the fresh air anyway" the brunette tried to smile.
Emma returned the strained smile with one of her own, doing her best not to pounce on the other woman, embrace her and never let her go. But she knew she couldn't. So she just turned to walk towards her car quietly with tears in her eyes.
"Emma…" she heard the brunette call. "I really am sorry" when she turned around to look at her, Regina was already walking away
"I know" she whispered to herself. "So am I"
Regina slowly walked down her stairs wondering who could possibly be at her door at such an ungodly hour. Truth is she was thankful for whoever it was because she hadn't been able to sleep. Not with a certain blonde occupying her every single thought. Everything she had encountered had somehow brought her back to Emma. Seeing her that morning had not been much help either. And after that, she had taken a long walk, not sure where she was heading but not stopping none the less. She'd finally stopped under the toll bridge where she had sat down and let the tranquility and peace the running water brought, calm her for a bit. That had been until a sharp scream had startled her.
SEVEN HOURS EARLIER...
"Help! Help! Papa…" Regina heard a small voice call. Immediately taking off, Regina ran towards the river and that's when she saw the small boy almost drowning but doing his best to stay afloat. With one wave of her hand, the boy had been lying next to her feet and she'd knelt down next to his little form.
"Are you okay?" she asked, running her hands over the little boy to make sure he was indeed okay, despite his grateful but scared nod.
"Roland!"
"Papa!" within no time, a man reached them and the boy jumped into him arms.
"Are you okay?"
"She saved me" the boy turned to Regina, gratitude in his eyes.
"Thank you. I don't know how to ever repay you" the boy's father said, Regina only noticing his British accent then.
"Don't mention it. Just take care of your boy."
"Thank you, your majesty." He smiled.
"You know who I am?"
"Your repetition in the enchanted forest presides you…Well, your majesty thank you again. I'm forever in your debt."
"I prefer Regina and you owe me nothing. You would have done the same if you were me…" Regina looked at him questioningly, realizing she didn't even know who he was, which was strange since she pretty much knew everyone in Storybrooke.
"Robin, Robin of Locksley" he said, his hand stretched.
"Ah…the thief" she sighed as Robin dropped his hand and picked up his son.
"I should probably get him to the camp. Thank you." He said, turning to walk away.
"He shouldn't sleep out here. At least not tonight."
"He's used to it. The forest is his home"
"I know. But this world can be unpredictable…different. I could get you a room at Granny's for tonight and if he's fine tomorrow morning, then you can bring him back here"
After a long hesitation and convincing, Robin gave in and Regina had magically transported them to Granny's.
"Regina!" Henry's excited voice called her. Robin, Roland and herself turned around towards the teenager, only to see that he was accompanied by his blonde mother. It took all willpower for the two women to keep their hands to themselves and stop themselves from running into each other's arm. "What are you doing here? I missed you."
"I missed you too" she said, sneaking a look at the then silent blonde. "This is Robin and his son, Roland" Regina said, trying to turn the attention from her even for a short while. When short hello's were exchanged, she figured it was her queue to leave. "What about you? Any plans for tonight?"
"No, we're having dinner with mom's friends. Wanna join us?"
"I can't, I'm sorry. I should be heading home. But we can have lunch tomorrow. If its okay with your mom"
"Can we, mom" the boy asked, turning to his blonde mother without missing a beat.
"Sure" Emma replied.
"Okay!" Regina said as she wrapped her son in a loving embrace, "I'll see you tomorrow"
"Everything has been taken care of," she said to Robin when she pulled away from the embrace, "Granny will take care of you both" she said and ruffled the youngest boy's hair. "Take care little man" earning a grin from the boy.
"Can I give you a hug too?" he asked, taking all of them by surprise.
"Of course you can" she said, doing her best to hide it and dropping down to her knees so she was on the same level as him and affectionately returning his embrace when his little hands encircled her neck.
"Thank you," he said in his little voice so only she could hear it.
After they both pulled apart reluctantly, she planted a kiss on his forehead and stood up.
"Thank you for everything you've done, Your…" Robin stopped she gave him a disapproving look. "…Regina" he finished.
"If you guys need anything, I'll be around" she smiled and turned to Henry and Emma who had been standing there the whole time. "So… tomorrow?" she asked Henry but her eyes never leaving the blonde.
"Yeah,"
'Alright, bye" she said before embracing him one last time and giving his other mother another sad look and walking away slowly enough to hear Henry ask what was going on between the two of them.
As soon as she was outside the door, she'd magically teleported herself to her painfully empty house just as the darkness started creeping in. After having a glass of her apple cider, she'd taken a shower and headed straight to bed, where she'd laid awake, staring at her ceiling for hours till she heard the persistent and loud knock on her door.
PRESENT…
"Emma?…What?!…" it was more of a breath or a whisper, because for some reason she couldn't find her voice. The blonde was the last person she'd expected to see at her door, but a second look at her and she'd gotten her answer. "Are you drunk?!"
"Just a little bit…" she hiccupped and staggered as she walked past the brunette and into the house.
Thank you all so much for the Birthday Wishes. They meant so much to me. I haven't had time to write of late and I'm really sorry that you guys get to read some very terrible and inconsistent writing. I thought I'd be free during the holidays but I'm not. I just wrote this from a car. I haven't proof-read it so I know there are lots of mistakes. Please let me know what you think. Love to you all and A Happy & Blessed New Year, 2015. Xoxo!
Love, A.