Good afternoon, ladies and gents! Short and sweet message from me this evening. Thank you all again for the massive support for the Cassidy Williams series! If you've been here from the start or just stumbling across it, you're support means the world! Please continue to submit reviews, alerts and favorites because I love to hear from each and everyone of you. Due to a small delay of lightning taking out our Internet service, I am finally able to update, so without further ado ...enjoy chapter six! - trs0010
Chapter VI: See Beneath Your Beautiful
Cassidy was perched on the edge of a hospital bed while a nurse stitched up her wounded arm with expert swiftness.
A new battle scar would soon take the place where a bullet grazed her arm while pushing Blake out of the line of fire.
It was a relatively deep wound, but nothing life threatening or serious. It was an easy fix. A few stitches and pills to numb the pain once the adrenaline died down completely.
Even the doctors assigned her case did not stay long to examine her wound. More pressing case like that of Gordon were calling.
After quickly prescribing antibiotics and pain pills before gruffly heading out the door to leave the stitching to a nurse practitioner.
Despite a highly, trained medical staff treating her injuries as minor, one look at officer John Blake would indicate that Cassidy's life hung in the balance.
She assumed that once Blake delivered her safely to the hospital that he would be on his way. Stacks of reports were waiting on his desk from the senator's rescue.
Cassidy assured him repeatedly she would be fine without him hovering over her, he would not leave.
He filled out the paperwork required for admittance into the emergency room ward. He refused to leave her side while in the waiting room, and now he was planted in the chair beside the bed while watching the nurse's every stitch with eyes of a hawk.
The protectiveness and worry was beyond Cassidy's comfort level. She thought she built her walls so high so no man could ever break through and destroy her like Tristan… like Jack.
Yet she willingly put herself in danger and possibly her life on the line to protect Blake. Somehow he had managed to swing a sledgehammer through her walls, and she did not notice how much she cared until the moment she thought she would lose him.
She let herself become lazy and too distracted by the smirk and charm. She let him get to close for his own safety. The Joker was lurking in the shadows. He would come for her one day, and that day was inching closer and closer.
She had endangered too many lives in the past. She wasn't going to add Blake's name to the list.
She began the task of building up her defenses as the minutes ticked by in the waiting room. They had to be stronger and higher than ever before.
She closed herself off from Blake. She barely acknowledged his presence and brushed off any questions he fired her way.
She must be cold. She must be harsh. She had no choice but to send him away to save his life. She owed him that small courtesy.
"Just need to wrap up your arm, and you're free to go," the nurse spoke after tying up the final stitch to finally break the silence that engulfed the room.
The older woman grabbed some gauze and medical tape and returned to her work of dressing Cassidy's arm.
Blake rose from his chair to end his watch over Cassidy.
"I'm going to get an update on Gordon. I'll be back before you know it," he reassured Cassidy so she knew he was not abandoning her.
He was doing everything possible to make Cassidy's task of driving him away harder than she thought it would be.
"You are one lucky woman," the nurse mused once Blake left the room to leave the women alone.
"Excuse me?" Cassidy asked to clear up her confusion.
"Your boyfriend," the nurse simply stated. "Handsome, caring and not to mention a cop to boot. I love a man in uniform. You have got yourself the whole package. I know a lot ladies who would kill to switch places with you."
"He's not my boyfriend," Cassidy quickly corrected.
"You could have fooled me," she countered. "If I was you I would lock that up before someone else does."
"Are we done here?" Cassidy asked annoyed and beyond ready to drop the conversation.
The nurse nodded, and Cassidy took that as her cue to bolt from the room. She did not wait for Blake to finish with Gordon. She did not track him down to inform him she was leaving.
She darted straight towards the exit doors and was grateful for the fresh air and freedom from the questioning of Blake.
She took a moment to catch her breath. She had been completely unaware that she was teetering on the edge of hyperventilating from the caged feeling from the nurse's comments, Blake's protective stance and her race through the hospital.
She hustled down the dark streets toward the direction of her apartment until she was able to hail down a cab to close out the journey.
She only relaxed once she was safely locked within her apartment with the only man she needed in her life: her dog.
It was then the exhausted overtook her.
A long night was an understatement. It was by far the most eventful night Cassidy had experienced while a member of Gotham Police Department since the Joker turned Gotham into his personal playground.
Cassidy collapsed on the couch and propped her feet on the coffee table. Hudson plopped down beside her and nuzzled his giant head in her lap.
She lazily brushed her fingers through his fur and enjoying a brief minute of blocking out Blake, the Joker and the city itself.
A knock on her door woke Cassidy up from a snooze she did not realized she fallen into. Hudson bounded towards the door with his loud bark sounding the alarm.
Cassidy pushed herself off the couch and checked her watch: 2:30 a.m. She roughly clocked in twenty minutes of sleep before her ruse awakening.
She was furious with whoever the hell was deciding to pay her a visit so late.
She staggered to the front door and peered through the peephole.
"Fuck…" she muttered.
John Blake was outside her door.
She debated her chances of leaving him stand there without an answer, but he knocked again with more force. It seemed she had no choice in the matter, and her neighbors would definitely complain if she let Hudson continue barking for much longer.
She partially opened the door while leaning against the frame.
"It's a little late for house calls, officer."
"You left," he stated as he pushed passed her and welcomed himself in her apartment.
"Would you like to come inside?" she sarcastically asked the empty space he was once standing while dramatically gesturing the empty air inside.
"Don't mind the…" Cassidy began, but once she entered the living room, the sentence died upon her lips.
Blake had thrown his jacket on the neighboring lounge chair before making himself comfortable on the couch. Hudson was at his feet with his tail wagging fiercely while enjoying an ear scratch.
"He's real vicious," Blake joked.
Of course her dog that seemed to hate all men would instantly love the one man she was determined to distance herself. Her life seemed like a cruel joke.
"You left your jacket, and here…" Blake handed her brown leather jacket over as well as a small bouquet of flowers, "…these are for you."
It was the second time this week she had been delivered flowers. Though Blake's offering was nowhere near as extravagant as the Joker's.
Where he had even found a place opened this late, she did not even want to know, but the small arrangement was a sweet gesture.
She could not deny that.
She quietly thanked him and retrieved a vase from the kitchen before placing the arrangement on the coffee table.
"Anything else?" she asked while stile visibly confused as to why Blake was even here.
The jacket and flowers could have easily waited until the morning.
"Why did you leave?" he asked.
"My arm was stitched up. It was late. I was tired. I went home," Cassidy explained with a little heat behind her tone.
"Wouldn't have killed you to tell me. I went back to the room and all that was left was your jacket," Blake replied. "I would have taken you home."
Cassidy could hear the hurt in his voice that he was trying so hard to hide, but it was plainly there.
"I do not need you take me home, Blake."
"You're doing it again," Blake sighed with heavy frustration as he threw his hands up in the air. "Damn it, Cass. Every time I think I've made an inch of progress and that you've finally let me in, you lock down every single time."
"Take the hint," she replied coolly.
"I don't buy it," he countered. "You don't enjoy living like this. You don't have to shut the world and everyone in it out. You don't have to punish yourself for something you had no control over."
"Don't even," she warned. "You weren't around when the Joker was on the top of everyone's mind. You didn't know me then or you would feel just as betrayed as everyone other cop on the force. You'd turn away and think I'm insane like the rest of them do. Hell, you would not even be wasting your time if I still had those scars."
It was Cassidy's best performance even though it was not much of an act in the first place. All the doubts and insecurities she felt about John Blake's attention were bubbling to the surface.
She was too exhausted to fight, too exhausted to keep the walls up much longer. She had to deliver the fatal blows soon and put an end to this tonight if she ever wanted to save him.
"You're not crazy," he corrected. "I also remember you hadn't had any surgeries when I first joined the department, and I asked you out then too. With or without them, I thought you were beautiful."
"Blake…" she started, but the force behind his next words cut hers short.
"You throw up every excuse in the book," Blake heatedly spoke for he was throwing his best shots tonight as well. "You can't hide behind Tristan, Joke and Bruce the rest of your life. I don't think you were crazy then, and I don't think you are crazy now."
"Your whole life people have disappointed you, betrayed you and left you, Cass," he spoke more gently. "After the job Tristan did, you were in desperate need for love, and unfortunately the Joker was there. You known it will not end well regardless of what fantasies you've dreamt. He'll hurt you worse than Tristan ever did."
"You've been waiting your whole life for someone to prove to you that they are here to stay, but when I finally show you, you are too damn scared to try."
A lone tear escaped Cassidy's eye. Apparently it was not she that was going to break Blake for his calling out the truth was more painful then she imagined.
"Just give up," she finally spoke with words heavy of more emotions than he could decipher.
The feelings she bottled for years were threatening to explode. Her past that she never truly dealt with was fighting back, and it was winning.
"There's nothing left for you here," she continued when he said nothing. "They took it all and shattered every single thing I had left. Gotham has so much to offer you than the life I lead, and I'm not dragging you down with me."
"You can't keep doing this Cass," he pleaded. "You can't keep this bottled inside. Since I've met you, I've watched you try to save your cousin. Well, look in the mirror, Cass! You aren't doing much better. Who is going to save you?"
"John…"
Blake smirked and a faint laugh escaped his lips.
"You know in the five years I've known you, that's the first time you have ever called me John."
He rose from the couch and closed the gap between them. He wiped away the tears and let his fingers linger on her face as he traced the faint outlines that remained of her scars.
She couldn't even look up at him. Everything she was fighting to destroy was pushing back with more force.
"You're wrong," he spoke gently. "Something is here: you. You are damn well worth the fight. If I have to ask you every single day until I am fifty for to give me one shot, I will."
"Everything can be mended, even you Cassidy, but only if you'll let me. I just want a chance."
His hand fell away as she walked towards the lounge chair to retrieve his jacket. He left Cassidy without a word as he marched towards the door.
Cassidy wanted to stop him, but her legs failed her. She had no words to make him stay.
Perhaps it was better to let him go without a single word. He would finally move on with the wife, kids and fairy tale ending he deserved. She would remain here to pine over things that would never come to be.
She heard the door creak open. He was finally free from her she thought until…
"Friday night. 8 o'clock. Dinner and a movie. You better be dressed to the nines when I pick you up, Williams. That's an order."
The door closed behind.
Cassidy should have known that it would not be so easy to let him go.
Her fingers grazed her cheek where his once lingered. She finally allowed herself to wonder if she ever truly wanted to turn him away in the first place.