AN: Still not JK Rowling.

I had been avoiding Sirius ever since I had blown up at him. The pain in his eyes when I said I didn't believe I would survive the war had cut deep. But I wanted Sirius to survive even if I didn't. That's all I wanted. He could easily find someone else if something happened to me. Me on the other hand I would be alone.

"Dinner!" I opened my door and almost closed it immediately. Sirius was standing outside my door a dark look on his face. My heart jumped into my throat and I took an automatic step back.

"You and I need to have a little chat." He said stepping into the room and shutting the door. I swallowed nervously and sat on my bed.

"Sirius I -" he cut me off.

"No Hermione." He shook his head his eyes dark. "I never want to hear you call yourself a mudblood again do you understand me?" I nodded dazed.

He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. "Look Hermione I know you don't think you'll survive the war and I understand where your coming from really I do but I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you live."

"Don't you think its a lost cause?" I asked shakily.

"No. I -" he blew out a breath. "I love you Hermione and that's not going to change. I want you to live a long and happy life even if we don't end up together."

"You think I could be with anyone else?" I asked touching my fingertips to his cheek.

"I don't expect to survive this war either." He said softly. "All I can do is live each day to the fullest. Why do you think there were so many marriages during the first war? Everyone was afraid their loved ones would be killed before they could have some happiness. Look at Arthur and Molly they got married during the first war and had seven kids."

"Is this your own strange way of proposing?" I asked breathlessly.

"No Baby, I'm just asking you to keep an open mind to the idea." My mouth fell open in shock and I blushed brightly.

Sirius chuckled and helped me off the bed. "Now I think Molly called us down to dinner."

"I think she did." I said as he led me out the door.

"God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs -" I snorted and laughed at Sirius' new rendition of 'God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen.' That's right it was Christmas Eve. When we got downstairs everyone was sitting at the table eating, even Harry who had tried to hide from us.

"So Harry... what do you want for Christmas?" I asked taking some shepherds pie.
After a moment he smiled cheekily and replied, "My two front teeth."

"Very funny," I muttered starting in on the food. Everyone else around the table looked confused.

"Its a muggle Christmas song," I said once I swallowed my bite. There were some muttered ohs and I smiled. "At least he didn't say a hippopotamus." Harry snorted and I smirked at him.

"That is also a muggle Christmas song." I said after a moment.

After dinner everyone went their separate ways and I headed to the living room where the Christmas tree was. I pulled out A Christmas Carol and sat next to the tree reading. We had a tradition in our family where we read A Christmas Carol every Christmas. Even if I didn't spend it with my parents I would still read it. My parents had been a little upset when they found out I wouldn't be going skiing with them but I had kind lost my love for it when I broke my leg from a skiing accident when I was nine.

"Baby its almost midnight what are you still doing up?" Sirius asked coming into the room.

"Just give me a minute I'm almost done." I turned the page and started on the last page.

"You should be sleeping," he said pulling the book out of my hands.

"Its a Christmas tradition." I said shrugging and reached for the book.

"Only you would have a tradition where you read a whole book on Christmas." Sirius said shaking his head.

"Hey I resent that!" I tried to pull the book back from him but he raised his hand up so I couldn't reach it.

"Give it back!" I glared playfully at him.

He shook his head and laughed. "Sorry Baby but you don't look that intimidating more like an angry kitten to be honest."

"I'll show you a kitten," I growled jumping at him. We tumbled back into the couch and he wrapped his arms around me.

"Still not that scary." He said breathlessly taking a playful nip at my ear. I shivered against him and sat up. The clock started to chime and I smiled at him.

"Merry Christmas Sirius." And before I could stop myself I leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips and whispered. "I love you."

AN: Review!