And so he's done it.

"500,000,000 Beri," Dragon hummed, tapping the newspaper's headline. "You've grown up to be quite the pirate, huh Luffy?" Dragon chuckled. "I wonder how that happened."

"Dragon?" Ivankov knocked on the door.

"Come in," Dragon called. The okama entered his office. Dragon had to admire the queer's Devil Fruit Powers. Although he had just seen Ivankov an hour ago in a meeting, the okama had seemlessly transitioned into their female counterpart. Really, by this point it shouldn't surprise him. But he couldn't help but marvel as his colleague slunk towards the seat across from him, hips swaying.

"Is that him?" Ivankov asked, taking their seat.

"What do you mean?" Dragon asked, trying to maintain a stoic expression. Ivankov sighed, and fluttered their eyelashes.

"You know exactly what I mean, candy boy," Ivankov whined, pointing a manicured talon at Luffy's new bounty poster. The boy was grinning widely, his pure joy painfully evident in the ink. For all Dragon was concerned, he looked about as threatening as a bunny rabbit.

"You should try smiling like him," Ivankov pouted, "maybe then all our recruits wouldn't be so scared of you."

"I wanted him to be a revoloutionary," Dragon mumbled.

"Hm? Well it's better than being a marine, isn't it?"

"I guess. Though I'm surprised he didn't go down that path what with Garp constantly pounding it in to him."

Ivankov laughed lightly.

"You Monkeys are one crazy family."

"A marine, a revoloutionary, and a pirate. All within 3 generations, mind you."

"You know," Ivankov began, "it's funny. Why didn't you ever tell me you had a son?"

"He was a vulnerability," Dragon frowned, "if the World Government ever found out I had family, a child no less, I can't even imagine what might happen."

Dragon grimaced, thinking back to Portgas D Ace's death. He shook his head slowly.

"But he can take care of himself, can't he?" Ivankov grinned, creasing the paper under '500,000,000' with his fingernail.

Dragon smiled.

"I suppose so."

Marco was completely prepared. No one would be getting the better of him today. Whitebeard's ship turned to hell if it was your birthday. Marco had already suffered through birthdays numbers 1 through 7 on the Moby Dick, and none had been even slightly pleasant. But today was his 10th birthday on the Moby Dick. And he was determined to avoid being pranked.

"Marco?" Thatch called, knocking softly on his door.

"GO AWAY!" Marco called back, "I'M WARNING YOU NOW!"

"Awww!" Thatch cooed, "Is the big bird—Chicken?"

Marco's eye twitched. That bastard.

"Nice try," he said, using all of his willpower to refrain from smashing the cook to pieces. "But I am not taking a step outside this damned cabin."

"Come on, Marco!" Ace called. Great. That crazy fire-fist was here too.

"Nope, not happening," Marco shook his head. "You try force your way in, and you're toast!"

"Hey!" Thatch protested, "My hair is off-limits for puns!"

"Puns, huh?" Ace chuckled, "Toucan play at that game!"

"Bring the heat, Ace," Marco laughed diabollically, "your mere flickers of fire cannot match my immortal blue flames!"

"Ok, that's just lame," Ace sniggered.

"IT IS NOT!" Marco screeched, opening the door, and punching Ace in the face. But the fire-user dissolved into flames. Shit. Marco thought, as Thatch grabbed his other arm. Ace reappeared, and latched onto Marco's fist.

"NO! NO! NO!" Marco screamed as they dragged him towards the deck.

"Relax," Ace rolled his eyes, "it's a good surprise this time."

"It's never a good surprise," Marco moaned, as they finally reached the deck. Marco squinted in the sunlight, his eyes finally settling on what looked like…

"A cake?" he asked disbelievingly. "Pops?"

Whitebeard stood proudly beside the 1 metre high, layered, and blue frosted dessert.

"You like?" he chuckled, his deep laugh shaking the Moby Dick.

"Yeah," Marco smiled, taking the knife that Izo handed him. He stepped towards the cake, and everyone around him backed up. Slicing into it slowly, he felt the blade hit something hard midway.

"No," he murmurred, "you wouldn't…"

Beep. Beep. Beep.

Marco scrambled to switch forms as his crewmates cackled.

BOOM!

"This is not funny," Marco squeezed his eyes shut. The bomb had blown up both the cake, and a hole in his chest. "This is not funny at all."

"To you!" Ace exclaimed, "It's quacking me up!"

"I will give you 3 seconds to get the hell out of my sight."

Kokoro took her first sip. The aggressive taste assaulted her taste buds, and she nearly spat it all out. But she forced herself to endure the fire blazing on her tongue. After the first few sips, she took a mouthful, swishing it around in her mouth. The alcohol licked at her throat, and she swallowed, sending a blaze down her esophagus. Seconds later, the airiness came. Her head felt light and fluffy, and she leaned back in her chair. Salty tears mixed with the spikes of alcohol, as Kokoro chugged half the bottle. Her mind dissolved into clouds, and she was slightly aware of Iceburg creeping up behind her.

"The hell do you want, brat?" she hiccuped, taking another swig from the bottle.

Iceburg paused, startled. Kokoro had never spoken to him this way. The sweet and docile woman he once knew had dissipated.

"What's wrong?" he asked, taking a seat across from her.

"You know exactly what's wrong, you son of a bitch," Kokoro cackled, staring out to sea. The porch creaked as a cat hopped up the stairs and onto Kokoro's lap. It was the stray tabby Kokoro fed each day.

"As long as he doesn't cause any trouble," Kokoro muttered, stroking the cat.

"You can keep him," Iceburg sighed, finishing Tom's quote to whenever Kokoro found a new 'pet'.

Kokoro downed the rest of the bottle, and threw it off the porch. The noise of the bottle shattering startled the cat. He jumped up and off Kokoro's lap into the shack.

"He's gone too," Kokoro laughed, reaching into her cooler for another pint. The alcohol sizzled as she cracked it open.

"That's enough," Iceburg murmurred, trying to reach out for the bottle.

"Get lost," Kokoro mumbled, taking a deep sip. "You're gonna go too, I just know it. Do it now. Do it now so I can hurt all at once."

Iceburg sighed, stepping back.

"Tom is gone," he said, holding up a finger, "and Flam is gone," he said, holding up another. "Tom's Workers is gone too," he added, lifting another finger. "But I'm still here. And I won't leave. I promise."

"Better not," Kokoro slurred, finishing off another bottle.

"Will you sober up if I leave you by yourself?" asked Iceburg.

"No," Kokoro giggled, "I don't quite think I'll ever choose to be sober again."

A.N.: Cutting it close at 11pm, but it's still the 5th! Anyways, I didn't really know what to do with Dragon, because I didn't want to impose on canon-yet-to-come. So, I did a reflective-interactive piece with Ivankov because I adore their relationship. Of course, for Marco, I had to continue the 'Whiteboard Prank Party' tradition, stemming from Jan 1 on Ace's birthday. I hope those puns weren't too cringe-worthy. I took one look at Kokomo's wiki page, saw that she was officially recorded as an alcoholic, and pretty much just knew exactly what I wanted to do. Hope it wasn't too much of a bummer, but I really wanted to create that 'slipping' scene, where it all just goes downhill. That was really fun to do. Reviews, Favourites, Subscriptions, Reader Birthdays, and Requests are welcomed and much appreciated! I'll see you tomorrow for Tashigi, Law, and Bartolomeo!