~Until Your Heart Stops Beating~
"Rose..." A voice calls out to me softly in the darkness I was surrounded by. It seems so familiar to me, but I can't place it. I open my eyes to a blaring light and quickly close them again. They water and sting, making me close them tighter.
I try again to open my eyes, slower this time to get used to the light. I stare up at the light blue sky that was filled with little puffs of white clouds. I look about me to find I was lying on the warm ground. There was grass beneath me, tickling my skin with its slick coolness. I look back to the sky and watch the clouds as they pass slowly overhead.
I couldn't remember how I had gotten here or where here was even. It felt familiar to me, but I couldn't remember ever having been here before. Maybe everything had been just a terrible dream. Maybe now I was awake and safe from harm. Maybe I had just been rescued and brought to this wonderful place. Maybe I was far, far away, where Charles Bromley would never get me. Maybe my prayers had been answered. Maybe I had died and this was Heaven.
Or maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was just a cruel dream. Maybe I would soon wake up to find I was being placed in the farm for milking. Maybe I already was. Maybe all of it had been some strange dream, my mind protecting me from the sheer horror. There were just too many maybes'.
I sit up and see that I am in a field of cosmos flowers whose colors ranged from red to white, hitting almost every warm color in between. There was yellow, crest red, day dream, Gloria, candy stripe, psycho white, seashell, Tetra Versailles, gold, purple, orange, and even lemon. Their fragrance filled the air and tickled my nose as they sway gently in the breeze that grazes my skin.
I look to the left at the large Eastern white spruce trees that outlined the field and stood like guards, watching over it. I stand up from the ground and look down at myself. I wasn't in the pink monstrosity Bromley had put me into; whether he was real or not. I wasn't sure anymore.
The dress I now wore was nicer; simpler. It was a light blue sundress that stopped right below my knees. The shoes I had been wearing were gone and now I was barefoot, feeling the cool grass between my toes. I could feel my hair on my back and remember the pink ribbon. I lift a hand to my head and feel for it, but find none. In its place was a headband that sat in the middle, keeping my bangs separate from the rest of my hair.
I look behind me towards the middle of the field. There stood an old weeping willow tree that created an area of shade beneath its large branches. I walk to it and stand beneath its drooping branches, looking up. Sunlight flickers down at me every once in a while through the branches, dancing on my face.
I drop my head and peer out over the field I stood in. I couldn't tell whether or not it ever ended. The flowers and pine trees seemed to go on forever till they met the blue sky on the horizon. Then they all melded together in an array of blue and yellow.
I walk back out into the sunlight and sit down amongst the flowers, crossing my legs like a pretzel. I look at the flowers as they sway in the breeze and then pick one of the candy stripe cosmos. I raise it to my nose and smell it, twirling it between my fingers as I smile softly at it.
I place the flower in my hair by my ear and lie back on the ground. I watch the clouds create pictures in the sky as they pass and sigh contently.
Everything felt real. Everything looked real, smelled real... where ever this was... it was perfect. If it was a dream I wish I would never wake from it. I didn't want to go back to that nightmare. It just wouldn't be fair...
"Rose..." The voice calls out to me again as softly as the first time. I open my eyes and stare up at the branches of the weeping willow I was lying beneath. The sun dances across my face through the branches as I remember taking up shelter here when the sun had fallen for the night and was replaced by the moon, "Rose..."
I sit up slowly and look around, searching for the source of the voice. Again, I couldn't see anyone and again the voice sounded so familiar to me. I could remember the face of the person it belonged to; blonde hair, emerald green eyes, lightly freckled fair skin like my own, but I had no name to go along with it.
I stand up from the ground and walk out into the sun. It warmed my skin and made me smile as I stretch myself and yawn. I look up at the sky that was again filled with little white clouds. I look over at the pine trees to my left and wonder what was behind them.
Maybe there was nothing. Maybe they just simply went on forever. Whether or not either was the case, I was going to find out.
I walk closer to the pines and stop before them, staring into what looks like a forest of them. I couldn't see an end. I knew forests though and I knew that standing at the edge of any of them, peering in, didn't mean there wasn't an end.
I take a confident step in, twigs snapping beneath my feet and then another and then another. The ground was covered by pine needles and twigs. I don't know how far I had walked, but suddenly everything changed.
The trees were no longer pines and cluttered together. At some point, I had walked into a forest of dogwood trees. The colors were so pigmented, so rich, and so varied that I didn't think they were real until I touched one. There was pink, yellow, red, and white. Here and there was a flower; a daisy or a daffodil.
The sun sparkles down from the sky, in little rays and beams, and kisses my skin as I walk past the trees. There were no more pine needles, but deep, lush, green grass beneath my feet now. I continue on, walking around the trees, and picking up every flower that I see as I go.
I hear the sound of running water in the air and walk towards where it was coming from. I step out from the forest and stand in soft soil that held tiny pebbles within it. To my left was a waterfall, dropping from a tall cliff into a river that flows past me and into another set of pine trees.
I could see on the cliff there were more trees, larger trees then the dogwoods. I look back at the river and spot red things floating along, bobbing up and down. I walk closer and kneel beside the river bed, setting down my bouquet. The water was full of these red things, just bobbing and spinning along downstream. I reach out to one as it passes and pluck it from the water; an apple.
I quickly wipe it clean with my dress and then take a bite out of it, suddenly feeling a pang of extreme hunger. It was the sweetest thing I had ever tasted. I look into the water, chewing my apple, and spot fish swimming around beneath the surface. They all look similar to each other, kind of grayish and short with beady eyes.
I sit down and let my feet dangle into the water as I take another bite from the apple I held. I look around the little clearing, declaring that there was nothing really here except for the river and waterfall. I look back at the waterfall and stare at it long and hard.
Like the field, it seems familiar. The sound of the rushing water, the apple trees up top watching over the fall, the fish that tickled my feet as they brushed past... Everything was familiar. It was staring me in the face and yet I couldn't see what it wanted me to know, what I was supposed to know...
The last two days just seemed to pass by slowly, but I didn't mind. It was nice and peaceful. This morning I had woken up and there had been no voice calling me, no familiar face to greet me; nothing but the scent of the flowers and the warmth of the sun on my skin...
For the moment, I was back in the field, sitting, making a halo of flowers with the daises, daffodils, and cosmos. I was comfortable and warm and safe in this field of flowers. I knew that I remembered it from somewhere. I knew I did, but I didn't really care anymore to think about how or why.
I look up from the halo, tying the ends of it together, and look out at the sun that was beginning to set. The sky was slowly turning an array of warm colors as it began to disappear on the horizon. It brought a smile to my face as I remember the waterfall, hidden in a world of its own behind the pines and dogwoods.
I place the halo on my head and pull my knees to my chest as I watch the last of the day disappears. It was beautiful and comforting, but it also made me feel lonely. I hadn't seen anyone else around the field or the forest or the waterfall and the voice had disappeared, leaving me to the flowers and trees.
I thought back to my cell, whether it had been real or not, and think of Edward. At least there, as rare as it had been, I had someone to visit me and talk with. We always found something to talk about; science, books, even politics as strange as that was for me, seeing as all the leaders were vampires. He had treated me like an equal and was so sweet and so polite.
This field was nice and it comforted me, but I missed him more then I missed everything else; more than my life, my friends... even my family. I missed him and the world I had once belonged to, as frightening and as horrible it had been. At least there I wasn't alone. At least there I had someone who believed in the same things I did, who understood everything I felt to such a degree that we seemed in sync with each other.
Edward had made me feel like, in some twisted way, I had actually belonged in that dark, horrifying nightmare. He made me feel like I belonged in his nightmare; his dark world.
"I miss you, Edward." I whisper softly and sigh heavily. "Whether you were ever real or not."
"Rosaline…" My ears perk up at the voice, not having been the same one from before. I look around to find the owner, but realize that I am alone still. The trees and flowers blow gently in the cool night's breeze. Several of the flowers are picked up from the ground and tossed about in the air, "...wake up..."
"Wake up?" I ask back as I stand from the ground. I knew whose voice this was. It was his; Edward, "Edward, where are you?"
I was asleep? But how could I feel hunger? How come I felt tired? And why did I feel lonely? It didn't make sense. I look to my right and then to my left in search of him.
"Rosaline, wake up." The voice calls again as softly as the first time. I look behind me at the weeping willow sitting in the darkness and slowly walk towards it. "You have to wake up..."
"Are you here?" I ask as I walk around the trunk of the tree and return to my original spot beneath it. I stare out across the moonlit field of flowers, "Edward?"
"Rosaline...!" I feel the breeze suddenly pick up, tossing my hair gently. I walk out from beneath the tree and start heading for the horizon. "Please Rosaline..."
I stop and look around me, feeling as though I was going nowhere. I look up at the sky where the full moon had been and see it waning right before my eyes. Slowly it became nothing and I was left in darkness, the stars twinkling above me. I hear a loud snap come from the trees to my right and cautiously walk closer. Another loud snap makes me stop in my tracks. I begin to back up, seeing a shadow move within the trees.
"Edward...?" I ask quietly, unsure if it were him. A softer snap sounds from somewhere closer by, making me take larger steps back. I see more shadows move in the trees and know that it was something else; something I should be afraid of.
"Please Rosaline..." Edward's voice calls. I keep walking backwards, my heart beginning to race, and pass the willow. I look to it and see a dark figure hide behind it, its eyes glowing yellow as it slowly bares its gleaming white fangs. "Rosaline, wake up...!"
I pick up my feet and turn, running towards the other set of pine trees, heading for the waterfall. I can barely see where I'm going and end up tripping, falling to the forest floor. I quickly stand back up and continue running, hearing twigs snap behind me.
"Rosaline..." I feel the branches of the dogwood trees slap me violently in the face, scratching me and drawing warm blood. I hear footsteps behind me, dozens of those things following me.
"Edward! Help me!" I scream out into the darkness, fear pulsating through my veins. I'm greeted by a root tripping me, sending me to the ground. I hear another twig snap and then another, the sounds coming from either side of me. I pull myself up and run, the shadows passing by where I had been on the ground a moment ago.
"Rosaline...!"
"Edward! They're coming!" I scream out again, tears rushing to my eyes. I break out from the forest and skid, coming to a stop by the river bed. I hear snaps from the forest and feel my tears spill, rolling down my cheeks.
"Wake up...!"
I try to think of where to go and then look to the waterfall where the river met the spill. I run as quickly as I can along the river bed and then dive in, swimming towards the foam. I swim and swim, getting closer to the darkness ahead.
"Rosaline, you have to wake up...!"
I pass by the fall and come up for air, finding myself in a little cave. I swim towards the shelf of stone ahead and pull myself up. I push myself as flat as I can to the stone wall and pull my knees up to my chest.
My teeth chatter and I shake violently from the cold. It was impossible to see inside the cave, so I close my eyes and hide my face in my arms on top of my knees. Tears fall from my eyes and leave warm trails on my arms.
"Rosaline please, wake up…!
"HOW!" I scream out angrily into the darkness, "TELL ME HOW!"
"Wake up, Rosaline. Open your eyes."
I start to sob, my body racking with each intake of breath. My Heaven had turned into Hell and now I was stuck in it, those things coming to get me. I had cornered myself inside a cold, wet cave, and there was no rescue coming.
Wake me up, Edward. Please..." I beg softly and look towards the mouth of the cave where the water fell like a drape. I spot shadow behind it and shake my head, begging for help. A head pushes through the falling water, eyes glowing, and teethe bared in a sadistic grin.
"WAKE ME UP!"