Chapter 19
Some of the Calabrians who had gathered to watch the prince beat his scribe senseless now hurried forward to carry the unconscious man in the direction of the castle. Dijana had seen the men gathered and correctly deduced that violence had drawn them, but she had not expected to see the emperor's son beating Stryfe. She intended to follow the men to the castle, but first she marched up to the arrogant prince.
"Are you pleased with yourself, you Calabrian dog?" she demanded furiously. "You have beaten an unarmed, untrained man! Would this please the emperor, your father?"
The prince was frowning as he rubbed his knuckles. "No, I doubt very much that he would be pleased." He glanced at the men remaining, and Dijana noticed that they turned away from him in disgust, and then he looked at Lord Taeron who had remained behind. "Are you going to run to your sister now and tell her everything you saw and heard?"
She turned to look at the man she had agreed to marry and she was infuriated to see him shrug carelessly after he had stood back and watched the prince beat his brother along with the other men. Dijana knew that he could not act against Prince Amyr because he was his personal guard, but she could not believe that he had not even tried to stop him.
"I'm sure one of the men has already reached her and given her a thorough accounting, princeling. I've always thought a good way to court a woman is to brutalize her family. Just surprised that you agree." With those strange words he turned in the direction of the village. "I will find the healer."
"I will help him in the meantime." Although Dijana was hesitant to spend more time with Stryfe after having exposed too much of her past, she felt a strange ache in her chest as she remembered his bruised and battered body.
Before she could leave, the prince reached out to put his hand on her arm, but she skittered away before he could touch her, so he scowled at her. "Leave him for the healer," he ordered gruffly.
"I do not take orders from you!" she retorted. "You disgust me. The Calabrians were better off when you were dead to them." Turning, she hurried away, fearing how he might respond, ashamed at what she had said to Emperor Trey's son.
By the time she reached the castle, her anger had abated and she was more concerned about helping Stryfe. A servant told her where to find the battered scribe, so she left in that direction, but when she reached the hall near his room, she heard the men talking. She paused just outside the door, not wishing to overhear their conversation and yet wanting to know how they felt about what the prince had done.
"Why did you let him do that?" She frowned at the words of one of the men. If he was talking to Stryfe, she was glad that he was conscious, but he implied that Stryfe could have defended himself.
"Do you think he has earned our respect after that selfish exhibition?" demanded another man that she recognized as Keldar, the one of the pilots from the transport that had taken her from Teralon. Since coming to Norvana, she had seen him sporadically because he spent most of his time working on the derelict spacecraft.
"I wanted to give him a chance to cleanse the bile from his system," Stryfe responded and her frown deepened as she realized Stryfe was not as helpless as she had thought. Dijana felt foolish for her efforts in attempting to teach him something he already knew. Now she understood the Calabrians' odd behavior and she felt embarrassed to realize that they had been taunting him.
"Nothing can cleanse him of his bile," Keldar said, his tone angry. "We should leave him here!"
"Never!" Stryfe now sounded furious. "I have an obligation to him."
Confused about the conversation, Dijana stepped into the room. "What obligation do you have to him?"
The men turned to look at her, the surprise at seeing her apparent. She should have remained in the hall a little longer and she might have learned some Calabrian secrets. Stryfe seemed at a loss for words, which did not surprise her, but Keldar frowned at her.
"He has the obligation of recording the account of his captivity for the emperor."
His answer seemed ridiculous but no one laughed so Dijana wondered if the emperor truly placed such great value on his scribe's services. She had already been told that he was to be protected, but no one had helped him when the crown prince beat him. Prince Amyr must be above reproach and the idea infuriated her.
"Your brother has gone for the healer," she told Stryfe, and then she crossed the room to pour water into a basin and took the drying cloth nearby. "I will take care of your wounds as you await her."
Keldar's frown faded and he chuckled. "Good luck, my lord." he said before leaving with the other men and she could hear their low voices and the sound of laughter.
Although she was annoyed to think she was a source of amusement to them, she ignored them and went to where he sat on the edge of the bed. "Why did the pilot call you 'lord'?"
His brow furrowed for a moment, and then he said, "The men call me lord because of my father and my brother."
It seemed like a reasonable explanation although it did not ring true, not after what he had told her about earning the title. He had no reason to lie about his status, so she decided that she was imagining dishonesty. After what happened with Kai, Dijana had difficulty trusting any man, but she wanted to trust Stryfe.
She wet the cloth and turned to wash the dirt and dried blood from his face, noting that an eye was swollen and would turn dark without the aid of the healer. A trail of blood from the corner of his mouth had dried and she remembered the wound from that morning. She wanted to quip that he should keep the healer at his side, and she opened her mouth to say so, but at that moment, she wiped the blood from his face and a trail of fresh blood dribbled from his cut lip.
Staring at it, she suddenly grew cold, then hot and she must have swayed because he reached out to steady her with his hands on her waist. Her breath came faster, but not from his touch, and she wanted to push away from him as she had that morning when she saw the blood seeping from the wound under his chin, but she could not move. Did he speak? She couldn't hear him because he sounded as if he were far away. She could only see and smell his blood, and when her mouth watered, her gut wrenched and she lost control of her actions. Too much time had past since she had last taken blood and she could not be denied now.
Lurching forward, she pressed her lips to the wound that bled, licking his blood, savoring the taste before she shoved him back on the bed and clamped her lips over the wound and drew in a mouthful of blood. Dijana had never known such pleasure from the blood of another, and as she swallowed, a dizzying sense of euphoria surged through her, igniting her body.
But the pleasure was interrupted when he suddenly jerked away and her moan of disappointment was cut short as he moved quickly to thrust her from him, propelling her off the bed and to the floor where he pinned her down with a knee pressed painfully into her chest.
He grasped her hair to jerk back her head so that he exposed her throat to a blade he held in his hands. She could not breathe, but he was panting, from exertion, from the arousal that her feeding had given him. She knew what he was feeling because she had felt it herself, many times, too many times when she had been the victim. She was not the victim now, and Dijana knew what she looked like in his eyes, his blood staining her lips, the whites of her eyes red. She had become the monster that she loathed and she wished he would kill her.
Their eyes met, and she saw shock and anger in his midnight purple eyes.
"Brother! What are you doing?" Dijana did not take her gaze from his, but she recognized his sister's voice and knew that she must have arrived with the healer.
"Stay back! She is a Varoonyan thrall." His breathing was still erratic, but he had managed to warn them and she wondered why he had not used the blade he held to the pulse at her neck.
But his words made her shudder with self-loathing. At least he had not called her an abomination as her father had when he learned what she had become, but hearing Stryfe announce what she was had the power to make her wish she was dead. After everything Kai had done to her, he had left her to live as the vile creature he had made her. Seeing the disgust on Stryfe's face now was worse than anything she had suffered at the warlord's hands. The scribe had been the first man in many years not to shun her, but now that would come to an end. She would rather be dead than live with his contempt.
"Put that thing away," she heard the healer order. "And let her go. You are hurting her."
"She is a leech," snarled Stryfe, not taking the dagger's blade from her throat.
"Let her go," repeated Carrinda. "If you do not, you will regret it, my lord."
"You had better do as she says," Quynn suggested. "She has some powerful nasty spells that you don't want her using on you." Suddenly the weight was gone and she could breathe again.
Dijana pushed herself away from him, scrambling back until she felt the wall at her back, and she drew up her legs to wrap her arms around. Stryfe was glaring at her accusingly. "She was sucking my blood," he told them as he tucked away his dagger. "Did you see her eyes? I have seen that before, on the battlefield on Teralon and Varoonya."
Carrinda approached her and when Stryfe tried to stop her by putting out his arm, she batted it away. "She is not the first blood thrall I have seen, although I have not seen any female thralls. I doubt this was by her choice." She squatted before her and reached out to touch Dijana who could not move any further away to avoid her touch. "You have a master."
Tears filled her eyes, but she nodded and raised her head to meet the kind gaze of the woman before her. She avoided looking at Stryfe. His tone told her all she needed to know. He had been on Varoonya with his brother who had earned his fame killing men who were like her.
"Who is it?" demanded Stryfe, stepping towards her, his hands curled into fists. "None of those bastards was left on Teralon."
"Kai!" blurted Dijana, mortified and yet relieved to admit to her disgrace. "He did this to me on Teralon before the imperial warriors drove him away."
"How could he have done this to you?" demanded Stryfe furiously. "Why were you not with the royal family?" When she did not answer, he turned on his heel and strode rapidly from the room.
"Don't worry," crooned Carrinda soothingly. "I won't let anyone hurt you."
But Dijana could only think of Stryfe finding Sharisse and demanding answers to his questions. He would discover the truth, the truth tainted by Sharisse, and she could not bear his censure when he heard what she had to say.
She shot to her feet and rushed out, ignoring the shouts behind her, but he moved swiftly and she had to run to catch up to him. "Stryfe!" she cried out, her voice shrill with panic. "Wait, Stryfe! I beg of you!"
He did not wait, and he seemed to fly down the steps and out the door of the castle. Once he was on the road, she was afraid that she would not be able to catch him, but he suddenly stopped, and she almost ran into him.
He spun and grasped her arm firmly, dragging her from the path and heading towards a small copse nearby with a handful of trees that would afford them some privacy. He did not speak until they were standing beneath a tree whose long branches were weighted down with leaves and vines. He released Dijana, then paced from her, not looking at her and she felt a weight in her chest. How had his opinion become so important to her? Because he was the only man that had ever looked past Sharisse to see her as she was and did not reject her outright.
Suddenly he stopped and turned to look at her and the ache in her chest grew more painful as their eyes met. She felt as if he held her heart in his hands, and despite everything she had suffered, she scolded herself for her wayward feelings. She must not feel this way for a scribe! Since she was a small child she knew that it was her duty to marry a warrior, and a man who made his way in life scribbling tales to amuse the emperor could not lead men into battle. Why would this man want her, knowing now what he did about her? And yet she wanted to press her body against his, to run her fingers through his hair and nuzzle her face into his neck and …
Tears spilled over her lashes now as she imagined how his pulse would feel against her lips, how she could nick his flesh with her teeth, how his blood would taste as she nursed it from his neck. Her stomach lurched, not with disgust, but with hunger and need.
His face did not betray his thoughts, but she knew how she looked in his eyes.
"I am sorry,"she managed to say after swallowing the saliva flooding her mouth in anticipation of feeding.
"Tell me what happened," he said, his voice no less harsh than when he had called her a leech.
Dijana couldn't speak in her present condition. As if he knew her predicament, he pulled out his dagger and before she could gasp in fear, he had dragged the razor sharp blade across his palm. To her surprise, he held out his hand to her, blood dripping between his fingers. Tears ran freely down her cheeks now, but Dijana could not stop herself from falling to her knees before him and grasping his hand like an animal to bring it to her mouth. The tears rolled down her cheeks as she licked his fingers, laving them thoroughly before pressing her lips to the wound he had made, sucking in his blood, tasting its richness mingling with the bitterness of her tears.
He stepped closer and she felt his fingers threading through her hair to hold her head to his hand. His touch soothed her and as her hunger abated, she was able to feed without shame choking her. The blood flowed faster, so she knew he was feeling the arousal that a feeding caused to stimulate the flow of blood. Kai had fed from her often enough that she knew what happened and why. He had laughed at the need he had created in her, rejecting her when she was desperate, using her only when she was lucid and tried to fight him.
Stryfe caressed her, slid his fingers lower to stroke the back of her neck and she heard his heavy, sensual sigh. "You … you have to stop or … or I will dishonor both you and me."
Dijana wanted him to dishonor her, to bring him down into the tall grasses with her where she could run her hands over the muscles she felt during their short training session. She wanted to be with a male in pleasure and not in pain and humiliation. But some rational part of her recognized the tortured note in his voice and she could not take advantage of him.
Running her tongue across the wound, she watched as it fused and faded, but before she could stand and try some explanation, he fell to his knees before her, and he guided her head to his, lowering his own until his lips were above hers. "I want to kiss you."
"Because of what I have done?" she asked breathlessly. She wanted to feel his lips against hers, to experience the intimacy with him.
He did not answer before his lips touched hers, gentle, caressing and the ache in her chest became unbearable. His hand moved slowly from her neck down to her back, gently pressing her closer to him as his lips parted. Dijana moaned with pleasure from the brief caress of his tongue against hers.
But before she could experience more, Stryfe raised his head, and his hands moved to her shoulders. "Tell me what happened," he said gently and she wondered if he seduced her just to get answers, to learn the details to add to his account of the attack on Teralon. Looking at his eyes, she did not see a cold-hearted scribe looking for information. Yet Dijana knew she was not a good judge of character because if she had been, she would never have given Kai the opening he needed in Teralon.
"Kai came to Teralon to negotiate a match with a princess of Teralon for his lord, Prince Rangyar. That is what he told Balak, and he trusted him because he arrived with Prince Staefyn who had come to visit his sister."
"Staefyn," hissed Stryfe, the name like a curse on his lips. "Did that dog touch you?"
She shook her head. Dijana did not like remembering her foolish behavior in those days before the invasion. She had been excited to meet the emperor's son, to entertain the idea that she might escape Teralon as a bride of Calabria or Varoonya. But like every other male that came to Teralon, Staefyn had been more interested in Sharisse and even then made it clear that he had found a bride on Calabria and was not looking for a wife elsewhere. Kai had not seemed to even notice her beautiful, vivacious sister and Dijana had been moved beyond common sense to find herself the object of his affections.
"Staefyn visited his sister briefly before leaving, but Kai remained behind." Dijana did not want to expose herself to Stryfe, but he had just experienced the worst he could about her, so she had no pride to lose in his eyes. "He courted me, not my sister." Dijana did not want to cry again, but she could not stop when she felt the stabbing pain of Kai's betrayal in her heart. Stryfe reached up to brush them away with the backs of his fingers, surprising her with his gentleness when he had not reason do feel anything but revulsion for her.
"I know that I am not the beauty that my sister is. You need not pretend otherwise, Stryfe. She has always attracted males while they ignore me. A man like Kai," like you, she added silently, "turned my head. I told him things that I should not have, and when he left and when the Varoonyan forces arrived, Balak blamed me."
"What did he do?" Dijana was surprised that he did not sound as if he had judged her guilty of inviting the Varoonyans to Teralon as Balak had charged. She would never forget his hateful words accusing her of jealousy and resentment towards them all.
"I … I trusted Kai," she whispered, ashamed to admit it to Stryfe. "I thought … I thought he cared about me." Dijana shook her head. How stupid she had been, to think that a man like warlord Kai could love her! "When I realized the truth, it was too late. I had shown him the secret entrance into the palace through the grotto. A guard in the tunnel escaped and warned us that the Varoonyans were coming. My father escaped from the roof with … with my sister, and Avar had taken Princess Chaela after I offered to distract the warlord."
"You offered?" he demanded. Somehow Stryfe knew the truth. Dijana had been terrified by the creature Kai revealed himself to be, but her father forced her to remain behind. She hadn't been brave. She had begged to go with them, and when he refused to take her, she had become hysterical until Avar had beaten her into unconsciousness. When she came to, they were long gone and she had raised her head enough to see that she was at Kai's feet. His fury at losing his prey knew no limit and for many days after, she wished Avar had killed her.
"Was there no one to defend you? Your sister? Your brother? Princess Chaela?" He said the last with deep regret.
"What could she do?" asked Dijana. "She was with child. She had to protect herself and my brother's child." Princess Chaela had given Avar a son which would have been lauded on Calabria, but Avar had been disappointed. He had hoped that his child would be a female so that he could repudiate her rights and offer his daughter as their mother's heir. After what Kai had done to her, he might have succeeded with the council, but a male child was worthless in their eyes. What was worse, his son was born without wings which made him an aberration.
"What happened to you was not your fault. But I vow to you that I will end Kai's miserable existence on my sword for what he did to you." He held up his hand where she had fed. "When you need my blood again, do not hesitate to seek me." He leaned forward and when he pressed his lips to her forehead, a contented sigh escaped between her lips. "I will tell my brother what you have told me, and after he has heard what I have to say, he will not honor any vow made to a man who could treat any woman as you have been treated. There will be no marriage between Lord Taeron and Princess Dijana."
Dijana should have been relieved, but she did not know what would happen to her if she did not fulfill the terms of the agreement between Teralon and Calabria. She had wanted to prove herself to Lord Taeron, to find some way to thank him for liberating her from the beast that had tortured her for many passings of the second sun. Prince Amyr's failed assault had allowed Kai the opportunity to torture her one last time before fleeing with his men when the Calabrians had breached the palace defenses. He had violated her brutally, then drained her of so much blood that he almost killed her before he forced her to drink his blood, making her his thrall. The returning winged warriors led by her brother found her in the grotto, convulsing at the foot of the statue of her beautiful mother, befouled and barely alive. Since that day, no one had spoken of what had happened to Princess Dijana. In truth, from that moment on, Princess Dijana had ceased to exist.