"I know it's weird, for both of us. I don't need guarding here on campus, so I don't care how you organize that. I'll probably want to go off-campus for a few weekends, so for the sake of appearances, you should come with me then. We both know this is so you can support Rose, so arrange things however you need to do that. Do you have any ideas?"
Dimitri nodded. He understood Adrian was trying to make it easy for him, but it went against his nature to take advantage or shirk his responsibilities.
"I do. I thought if I moved training a little earlier, Rose and I would be done in time for me to spin past here for breakfast. We could breakfast together, here or in the cafeteria, and then I could accompany you to the feeders and on to be the guardian for your morning session with the Princess? Then I could take you and her to see the feeders and lunch at the cafeteria. If you didn't need me after that, I thought I could do general duties guarding classes but finish in time to be free for Rose's counseling in the afternoon and then her afternoon training session. I could then return, and I'd be back on board for dinner to guard you after that, or if you don't need me, I'll work an evening shift."
"Have you thought where you'd like to stay?" Adrian asked.
"It's up to you. I don't mind, but it might be more convenient if I stay here?"
"I'd appreciate the company," Adrian said. It was clear he meant it. "And of course it means you can have Rose visit."
Dimitri stopped, trying to put his thoughts into words.
"That's not why I'm suggesting it. I'd love to be with Rose all the time, but when I'm working, my charge is my responsibility. We both appreciate last night - after what happened, we needed that time together. But I'm not suggesting it become a regular thing."
Adrian shrugged, taking a deep swig of his bourbon on the rocks, not meeting Dimitri's eye. It was 1 am, just after lunch their time, and he was starting the afternoon with a few shots of liquor. Spirits for spirit, he'd joked – referring to the magic he'd expended practicing this morning. Now Lissa was severely limiting her use of spirit, more was falling to him in their sessions.
"She's your girl. I get it if you want her to stay over."
"Of course I do, but for now, we need to get through her last months at school. She's going through a lot; I just need to be around to support her."
"Understood. But if supporting her sometimes means being with her, it's ok for her to visit. Stay over if that's what she needs. I'll get you a key, and one for Rose, too."
Dimitri nodded in appreciation.
"So you mentioned going away for a weekend. Any plans I should know about?"
"I thought I might go to Court. You know – spend a weekend with the ladies!"
It was sad the way he said it; clearly mocking himself.
"Where do you stay at Court?" Dimitri asked curiously.
"With dear Mama and Papa," Adrian joked. "I'd hate to deprive them of my sparkling company."
"You're not close?"
"My mother is a self-absorbed social climber who has the unfortunate habit of loving me despite the embarrassment I continually bring to the family. My father is a wealthy boorish ass who thinks being royal, and nephew to our Queen makes him better than everyone else. "
"What about your extended family?" Dimitri fished, watching Adrian carefully to see if there was any flicker of recognition.
"Well my mother was a Tarus, so there are a few cousins there, but she 'married up' so she doesn't associate with them that much. We see a bit of Prince Rufus and Aunt Tatiana, of course. My father has a brother, Randall, but I've not seen him since I was a teenager."
Dimitri stared at Adrian. It was now or never.
"Neither have I."
Adrian's eyes flicked to Dimitri's and the expression on his face was almost comical.
"Oh hell! You're his son, aren't you?"
"That's what my birth certificate says," Dimitri said levelly, immediately wishing he hadn't said anything.
"How long have you known?" Adrian asked in wonder, studying his face looking for similarities.
"Only a couple of hours. I rang my mother, and she mentioned it then."
"You really didn't know?"
"My sisters and I don't consider him a father. He was violent and abusive, and the kindest thing he ever did was leave our family alone. I knew he was an Ivashkov, but beyond that, I never thought about it."
"Well, this will be fun! I'll be living with family!" Adrian joked.
"I'd prefer that information stayed between us. I thought I should tell you before we go to Court. I don't know whether your father knows anything about Randall's visits to Russia."
"He knows he has children there, but being Dhampir he doesn't consider them 'family'" Adrian said apologetically. Dimitri was unperturbed - the feeling was mutual. "Will you tell Rose?" Adrian asked.
He shrugged. "I guess so."
Dimitri was surprised to see Eddie with Rose when she arrived for her counseling session, and even more surprised to see her with red-rimmed eyes but appearing more at peace than she had since she'd come back to them.
Rose gave Eddie a long hug before taking Dimitri's hand and entering Deirdre's office.
"Welcome Rose. I understand you wanted Guardian Belikov here, at least for your first session?"
"Dimitri, and yes. Is that alright?"
"They're your sessions, Rose. You can invite whomever you want. Also what you say here is confidential. Feel free to be yourselves," she said gesturing to the chairs and sofa.
Dimitri sat in the corner of the couch, unsurprised when Rose kicked off her shoes and sat beside him, tucking her feet under her and sitting close to him.
"You're very comfortable in Dimitri's presence?" Deirdre observed, but the way she said it was more of a question.
"Yes. We're together," Rose replied, daring her to make an issue of it.
"I know that, but you find his physical presence comforting?"
Rose thought about it. This hadn't been what she thought they'd be talking about, but she'd go with it.
"I trust him. We've trained so often together our bodies are somehow in sync. And he's never let me down."
"He left you."
"Not by choice," Rose snapped. "He was told to get another allocation. He did what he did to protect me."
"Is that how you initially saw it?" Deirdre asked, lifting an eyebrow.
"No. I thought he'd left me to be in a relationship with his new charge."
"Why did you think that? Had Dimitri given you any indication that was his intention?"
"No. He told me it wasn't that way. But she's beautiful, has money and they could be in a proper relationship together."
"And you can't?"
"Not really," Rose said with a sigh.
"What do you mean, Rose? Do you mean sexually? Are you concerned that you and Dimitri can't have a fulfilling sex life? Are you sexually active?"
"No. I mean yes. I mean that's not it! There are no problems in that area," she assured Deirdre, consciously not looking at her Russian God. "I mean hiding and pretending not to be in love. It's not just because I'm still at school. I'm training to be a guardian. Dimitri is already one. There's a stigma about Dhampir, but particularly guardians, being in relationships. His former charge lived in the human world. If he'd been with her, he could have lived a normal happy life without people commenting and passing judgment. He could even have become a father."
"So you thought he'd chosen that life?"
"Yeah. At first."
"Why wouldn't he choose you, Rose?"
"Because no one ever has."
The words were out of her mouth before she'd even thought about it. She felt Dimitri flinch beside her, his arms unconsciously pulling her into his embrace. She felt the rumble of an angry growl in his chest, yet it was strangely reassuring.
"Are you talking about your parents now?" Deirdre probed.
"Yes," Rose sighed, cuddling into her Russian God.
"Tell me about them."
The rest of the session was spent talking about Rose's upbringing and feelings about her parents and their recent interactions.
"We're out of time," Deirdre said at the end of the session, "but I'd encourage the two of you to have a conversation and soon about what you want from life and each other. It's ok if you don't have all the answers just yet, we can work through that in future sessions."
Rose put her shoes back on, and the two of them left the counselor's office in silence.
"You were quiet in there," Rose started, a little shy about everything she'd revealed.
"I wanted to hear what you had to say. But she's right – we should talk."
"Good talk or bad talk?" Rose said, looking at him seriously.
"Good talk, I hope. But we should make sure we're on the same page."
"Ok. What about after training?" Rose suggested. It had been a long, emotionally charged day, and the idea of some training before another deep, meaningful conversation was appealing.
"That sounds perfect."
"So how did your chat with Adrian go?" she asked as they walked towards the gym.
"Surprisingly well. I'm going to bunk in guest accommodations with him. I thought that way maybe I could get him to look after himself a bit better."
"Will we still be able to train?"
"Yeah. Mornings will have to be fifteen minutes earlier, but we should be able to train and breakfast together, then I'm guarding Adrian until the end of lunch. I'll guard your classes after lunch until your counseling session. If you want me to come to that, I will. Otherwise, I'll guard another class and meet you for training. I'm back with Adrian from dinner onwards."
"That won't leave us a lot of time together," she said sadly. "Just meals and training?"
"It's only for three months, but Adrian said it's ok for you to visit. Even stay over occasionally."
"We could hang out together?!" Rose gasped hopefully.
"Not all the time, but maybe a couple of nights a week we could have dinner and watch a movie, and you could stay?"
"Would you like that?"
Dimitri stopped and grasped both her hands. "I'd love that, Rose. I treasure all our moments together."
They were both quiet during training, but Dimitri was pleased to see Rose seemed content.
"How are you feeling?" he asked while they were doing their weights.
"Good. Eddie and I talked about Mason. I still feel sorry that I let him down, but Eddie helped me see that Mason wouldn't have wanted me to go with him if I was unsure. It helps a lot to know that."
"And the darkness?" Dimitri asked casually.
"I think I've burnt most of it off, and Lissa's barely using her magic, so that's helping."
They were working side by side and chatting when the door to the weights room opened, and Janine walked in uncertainly.
"Rosemarie? I wonder if I could have a moment?" she asked, looking at Dimitri warily.
Rose shrugged.
"Your father and I are worried you got the wrong idea the other day. We'd like the opportunity to speak with you and explain in greater depth why we made some of the decisions we did. Your father is devastated your first meeting ended as it did – he's been waiting a long time to get to know you."
Janine paused to give Rose a chance to respond, but she didn't.
"I know you need time, but we thought maybe the three of us could go away somewhere nice for a weekend so we can talk? I'll be the first to admit I've made mistakes – a lot of them. But there is more to the situation than you realize. We want to tell you everything."
"I'm not going anywhere without Dimitri."
"Rosemarie, Dimitri is a guardian. He can't just leave his charge," Janine said in exasperation.
"Well if he can't come, I'm not going."
Janine's face was getting red – as though she was only just holding onto her temper.
"Dimitri? I don't suppose you could try and get either this weekend or next off? Abe and I would appreciate it," she said in a forced, tight voice.
Dimitri looked at Rose carefully, seeing her little nod.
"I'll see what I can do, Janine."
"Is there anything else?" Rose asked rudely.
"Yes. Your father thought you might like to choose where we go?"
"Somewhere near the ocean. Dimitri will let you know when we're free," Rose said, dismissing her mother by turning her back on her and starting on a new piece of equipment. They only worked out for another ten minutes after Janine left. Neither of them was in the mood.
"Come on. Let's get changed and go talk," Dimitri suggested.
They quickly showered and changed, leaving the gym by the rear entrance heading out into the woods the way they had a fortnight before. Like last time, Dimitri led them until they were almost in their own little world amongst the trees. Again he threw down his duster and sat down on it, Rose climbing straight onto his lap.
"Rose? How much do you remember from when you were asleep? Could you hear us?"
"I drifted in and out. I couldn't be with Mason and listening at the same time."
"Were you there at the end when I was talking? Do you remember what I said?"
"About breakfasts and romantic movies and going to Siberia together?" she said shyly. "Yes, I heard all that."
"And did you hear when I said I hoped one day you'd wear my ring?"
"I heard that too," she confirmed nervously.
"I'm not asking you that question, yet. But do you see us being a long-term thing? Can you see me as your boyfriend? Your partner and maybe one day something more?"
"I can," she whispered.
"So can you forgive me? Do you still want to be my girl?" he whispered back anxiously.
"Always."
His smile was radiant as he pulled her chin up and they kissed sweetly.
"I love you, Roza. We're going to figure this out together."
"I love you too, Comrade."
It was enough to sit silently holding each other, so that's what they did. After fifteen minutes, Dimitri checked his watch.
"Come on, beautiful. If I don't get you to dinner soon, Lissa will probably send out a search party," he chuckled.
"Yeah you're right," she laughed. "So do you think it will be hard getting time off to go away with my parents? And are you sure you don't mind?"
"If you need me, I'll be there," Dimitri said, secretly thinking a weekend away with Janine Hathaway and Abe Mazur ranked only slightly above repeatedly bashing his testicles with a rubber mallet. "And I think Adrian will be all right with me taking a weekend off. I have a lot of leave accrued, and he's already indicated he's willing to be accommodating. Speaking of Adrian, I found out something interesting today."
"Oh?"
"Well I rang Mama and told her about my new allocation, and she pointed out Adrian's father Nathan is the younger brother of my Moroi father, Randall Ivashkov."
Rose stopped and spun to look at him. "So that means you and Adrian are…"
"Cousins," Dimitri said, a ghost of a smile on his lips.
"You didn't know?"
"I don't think about my father. I knew he was an Ivashkov, but beyond that, I never looked further into it."
"Does Adrian know?"
"Yes, I told him. He wants to go to court for a weekend, and we'll stay with his family. I wasn't sure how much his father knew, so I thought it best I mention it."
Rose giggled. "You're really nothing alike! How does it feel to have a cousin? Is he your only one?"
"As far as I know. Like I said, I don't know anything about the Ivashkov side of the family."
"Aren't you curious?" she asked, and Dimitri could tell she was thinking about her own mostly unknown family background.
"Not really, but it's different for me, milaya. I knew my father. He was a weak and cruel man who'd hurt my mother. I know enough about him already."
"You think I should give my parents a chance, don't you?" she asked intuitively, reading between the lines.
"It's up to you. But if you want to, I'll go with you."
"It could be a pleasant weekend away?" Rose suggested hopefully before they looked at one another and started laughing.
As expected, Lissa was looking around expectantly when Rose and Dimitri walked in. Christian, Eddie, and Adrian were all sitting with her.
Is everything ok? Eddie said you had a session with the counselor?
"All good, Liss," Rose replied, a little annoyed to have people talking about her behind her back.
Don't be cranky. I grilled him for info. I was worried.
"Alright alright," Rose conceded, getting mildly curious looks from the guys.
Lissa grinned. "You missed some stuff in Animal Behavior today. Do you have plans tonight or did you want to come study and I can show you what was covered?"
"Good idea! We can all study together!" Christian said enthusiastically, only to be silenced by a single look from his blonde girlfriend. "Or I could study by myself, and you girls could catch up?" he quickly amended, earning himself an approving look.
"Rose? I still have a spare outfit and gym clothes in my room for you. You could stay if you want? It's been so long since we've had a sleepover! I've got a USB stick filled with a crapload of new release chic flicks for once we've studied," she coaxed. "And I'll make microwave popcorn…"
Rose grinned with genuine enthusiasm. Lissa had been her friend so long she knew all the right buttons to press!