A/N: For those who enjoy OTA, you'll probably like this chapter...

Felicity headed to the lair the evening after her awards dinner feeling as if a hundred pounds had been lifted from her shoulders. There was no way William Dennis was coming after her any time soon; he had destroyed his chances of getting out on bail a second time when he'd waved a gun in front of a hundred people. And her mother had boarded a plane back to Las Vegas earlier that afternoon, returning privacy and quiet to the loft. Felicity was looking forward to an easy night helping Oliver catch a couple of unchallenging criminals and then bringing him home with her and taking him to bed. She hadn't seen him for two days. It was going to be nice to reconnect with no interruptions.

She stepped out of the elevator, surprised to find Oliver and John already in the lair despite the relatively early hour. The men were slouched comfortably in their seats on the computer platform and she got the impression they'd been there for some time. Both were grinning in that buddy-ish way men have when they've been ribbing each other about something. Digg's grin looked a little triumphant and Oliver's a little sheepish, so Felicity suspected John had come out on top of whatever debate they'd been having. She wondered if it had something to do with her. John had expressed nothing but happiness over his two friends becoming a couple again, but that didn't mean he was above teasing Oliver about losing his status as an unattached man. Felicity knew that married guys, including John, took particular delight in seeing their single pals become "domesticated." At any rate, whatever the pair had been talking about, they were clearly both in good humor and having a good time.

She spotted a bottle of whiskey perched precariously near one of her servers and their silly grins made even more sense. Not only was this two close friends kidding one another, she realized; it was two close friends kidding one another…encouraged by alcohol. She felt happy for Oliver. He seldom had the opportunity to relax and he almost never let himself get loosened up by drink. Tonight he was letting go with the person he trusted most in the world – other than her, of course. Felicity didn't know how full the whiskey bottle had been when they'd started, but there was less than half remaining now. She figured that meant a couple of glasses apiece and maybe even more. She also decided that she'd put her foot down if either man suggested suiting up. They deserved a night off and it wouldn't be safe to go out in their present conditions…not that they seemed in a particular hurry to pursue criminals.

In fact, Oliver and John looked as though the thought of suiting up was the furthest thing from their minds. They both seemed firmly planted in their chairs.

"I take it the bad guys are getting a reprieve this evening," she said lightly, pointing at the bottle.

John nodded. "We figured since we didn't have the chance to toast you last night when you received your award at the college, we'd toast you tonight."

Felicity laughed. "That's very thoughtful of you. Just how long have you been toasting?"

John shrugged. "We started half a bottle ago. Curtis joined us for a little while, but he's a lightweight so we sent him home. Why don't you grab a glass, Felicity? There's always another bottle if we finish this one."

Felicity thought about it. She really wasn't much of a whiskey drinker. It tended to burn on the way down and make her head throb the following morning. Wine was more her thing. On the other hand, it had been a long time since the lair had been occupied by only the three of them and it felt good – like coming home after a lengthy, difficult trip. And they'd already written off doing any work for the night so why not imbibe a little with her besties? She smiled. "You talked me into it."

"Great. Glasses are over there."

She retrieved a glass and tipped some whiskey into it, stopping when it was about a third full. If they thought Curtis was a lightweight, she was pretty sure they would put her into the flyweight class. She grabbed a chair and wheeled it next to Oliver's before sitting down. He hadn't said a word since she'd walked into the lair, but he was looking at her very warmly and she had a premonition that neither of them would be getting a lot of sleep that night. His hand came over to caress her thigh, pulling their two chairs closer together as he did so.

Diggle cleared his throat and Oliver removed his hand.

"I heard Dennis was denied bail?" John asked Felicity.

She nodded. "Yeah…I guess waving a gun around and threatening people at the awards dinner worried the judge. Unless," she added to Oliver, "you had something to do with it?"

Oliver shook his head. "No, the DA pushed for no bail without encouragement from the Mayor's office. I think the DA is going to recommend that a psychological evaluation be performed on Dennis. The man seems to have an unhealthy obsession with you." He clenched one fist as he spoke.

Felicity thought about that. "I don't know that it's me so much as trying to prove that I was unfit to lead Palmer Tech," she said. "He's certainly taken extreme measures to justify firing me." She shrugged ruefully. "I'm not sure how I do it, but I seem to have a talent for attracting weirdos. There was the lacrosse player my freshman year at MIT, then Cooper-"

"Hey!" Oliver interrupted. "I'm not a weirdo."

She smiled. "No, present company excepted of course. I took a big step up when I got involved with you." She reached out to touch his cheek and his eyes darkened.

"Oh, I don't know," John said cheerfully, "Oliver strikes me as pretty weird. He likes dressing up, for one thing. And remember his eye makeup phase, Felicity? Before Barry made him the mask? If only the criminal element knew The Arrow used cleansing lotion every evening after taking out bad guys."

Felicity laughed. "True enough. I guess Oliver does have his quirks. Fortunately, I kind of like them." She stroked his cheek lightly and then moved her hand into his hair. He'd let it grow a bit recently and she loved the feel of it between her fingers. It was soft and a little tickly. Hoping she wasn't embarrassing John by her display of affection, she slid her hand to the back of Oliver's head to gently caress it.

And then stopped.

Because something didn't feel right. She knew the shape of Oliver's head like she knew the keys on her computer keyboard and there was definitely something out of place. In fact, she could swear there was something extra back there.

She moved her hand through his hair again – this time more experimentally than affectionately.

Yup…there it was; it hadn't been her imagination. There was a lump the size of an egg on the back of Oliver's head. And not a Medium or Large egg, but an Extra Large or even Jumbo. The size that costs a dollar more per dozen in the supermarket. She was quite certain it hadn't been there two days ago.

She peered into his face. "Oliver, you have a lump on the back of your head."

He shot John a guilty look and then nodded briefly. "I know."

"How on earth did it get there? It wasn't there two days ago and you said you were spending last night with the city councils. You even texted me from the meeting."

He nodded again, not meeting her eyes. "I did."

"So what happened – you went out and did a little free-lance Arrowing after the meeting without me? You know you should always have backup. Some thug was able to get the jump on you and hit you on the head?"

There was a loud snort from across the computer platform and Felicity looked up to see John smirking at Oliver. Oliver glared at him in return. Evidently, John knew something about the lump – something that neither man had shared with her.

At least not yet...

She decided to start with Diggle. He was generally less stubborn than Oliver. She gave him her best intimidating stare and used her loud voice. "I take it you know something about this, John?"

He sobered and returned her stare warily. "I might."

"And?" Felicity asked at the same time that Oliver warned, "John-"

Diggle glanced between the two of them and evidently decided he was more afraid of Felicity. He shrugged apologetically at Oliver before saying to her, "Your boyfriend stepped out of the city council meeting for a little emergency Green Arrow activity last night. He wasn't gone long, though, and he had backup. I was there."

Felicity's brow creased. "The two of you went out last night? What exactly was the emergency?"

Diggle cleared his throat. "You were, actually."

"Me?"

"Yeah. Oliver got worried when you texted him that Dennis was at the awards dinner. He asked me to go pick you up, but I guess he decided I would take too long because he suited up and went there himself."

Felicity frowned, thinking back to the prior evening. "I didn't see either one of you there."

John nodded. "That's because it turned out we weren't needed. The ladies of Star City took care of the problem on their own. We left as the police arrived…I didn't think it would be a good idea for them to find me."

Felicity recalled her mother knocking Dennis out with the chair and chuckled. "Yeah…the women were pretty badass, weren't they? Especially my mom."

Diggle grinned and Felicity noticed an extra twinkle in his eyes. "Your mom did great, Felicity. I can see where you get your courage from. And apparently she even had a little badass left to spare after taking out Dennis." He gave Oliver a meaningful look and Felicity noticed Oliver's knuckles whiten around his whiskey glass.

"I think that's enough, John," he said sharply. Diggle stopped speaking, but the grin didn't leave his face.

Felicity glanced between the two men, trying to make sense of their words. This thing they weren't saying had something to do with her mother? What on earth had Mom done to cause such secrecy…and in John's case, such glee? Donna had been with her the entire evening ...well almost. There was that trip she took to the ladies room after knocking out Dennis. Which had lasted over twenty minutes. Hmmmm.

She resumed her loud voice. "Okay, gentlemen. Enough with the secrets. I want to know exactly what happened last night. What do you mean my mother still had a little badass left to spare? Did she do something after hitting Dennis?" When they didn't immediately respond, she added, "Listen guys, unless you want me finding old yearbook photos of both of you online and sharing them with Lyla and Curtis, you will tell me what happened. Oliver, I recall you making some strange hair choices when you were younger and, John, I'm sure you weren't always the physical specimen you are today."

John's grin faded and the two men regarded her cautiously. After a minute, John raised his eyebrows at Oliver as if to say: You know one of us is going to crack. Are you going to tell her or should I?

Oliver gave John a resigned look and exhaled loudly. "Fine," he said abruptly to Felicity. "I'll tell you what happened last night. It's really not that exciting." He hesitated and then added, "Your mother is the person who hit me on the back of my head, not some thug. She gave me the lump."

Felicity stared at him, certain she hadn't heard correctly. "What did you just say?"

Diggle choked back a laugh but Oliver merely rolled his eyes. "I said," he repeated, enunciating each word slowly, "that your mother gave me this lump." He pointed to the back of his head.

It still didn't make sense. Felicity frowned. "Why on earth would she do that, Oliver? My mother likes you." She looked at him, hoping for some kind of clarification.

The explanation, however, came from John. "It wasn't exactly Oliver your mother was hitting," he said. "It was the Green Arrow." He looked at Oliver and Felicity and his eyes twinkled. They'd been doing that a lot tonight. "Apparently she's not happy with the current bedroom…mathematics, Felicity. She thinks three is one too many in a relationship."

Felicity groaned. "Oh…she's still hung up on the threesome thing."

Oliver nodded. "And she wanted to warn the Green Arrow to stay away from you – to not mess up your relationship with Oliver Queen."

"Oh."

Felicity was starting to understand why John had looked so amused all evening. She could only imagine the conversation he and Oliver had been having before she'd arrived. She shook her head. "Oliver, we need to do something about this. I never thought it was a good idea to let her believe the whole threesome idea and it just seems to be getting worse. We need to find another story that will let her be okay with me dating Oliver Queen and working with The Arrow."

Diggle shrugged. "I don't know," he said blandly. "I think it's kind of cool. I mean, I always thought of you and Oliver as a pretty conventional couple – apart from the arrows, the hacking and taking down the city's worst criminals. It's nice to discover there's a wild side to you both that I haven't seen. I was thinking of mentioning it to Lyla. Maybe the four of us can swing sometime."

Felicity and Oliver stared at John.

"That's a joke, right?" Oliver said at last. "I mean, you and Lyla don't…"

John stared back at him impassively.

Felicity took a big gulp of whiskey. She didn't care if it burned her throat. She needed it.

Oliver lay on top of the comforter on Felicity's bed in nothing but his boxers as she performed her evening ritual in the bathroom. He supposed he needed to start thinking of it as their bed again. It had been over a month since they'd resumed their relationship, and with Donna back in Las Vegas, the loft felt like home. He noted a tingling in his body that had nothing to do with the whiskey he'd drunk earlier. He hoped she wouldn't be too much longer.

"I think we certainly amused John this evening," he called out to her, wanting to be heard over the sounds of tooth-brushing.

"It's good to have him home." Felicity's voice came back a little garbled by the toothpaste in her mouth. "I know I was against breaking him out of prison, but the lair didn't feel the same without him. The three of us together tonight was nice…except for the part about my mom hitting you…and the threesome…and swinging…"

She emerged from the bathroom with her face freshly washed, wearing a tank top and shorts. Oliver loved seeing her like this. He never understood why women were reluctant to go out without makeup. Felicity looked young, vulnerable and very beautiful – a natural sort of beauty that could never be duplicated with cosmetics. She smiled at him as she placed her glasses on the bedside table, and he knew for certain that he was a very lucky man.

He patted the bed by his side. "Get over here," he said softly. "I'm getting lonesome."

She crawled across the comforter to stretch out on her back next to him and he rolled onto his side to face her, propping himself up on one elbow. She sighed contentedly as he rested his other hand on her upper thigh, and she reached up to touch his cheek. As she'd done in the lair, she moved her fingers gently through his hair until her hand ended up at the back of his head. Her eyes never left his.

"My mom really did this?" she asked, lightly tracing the lump on the back of his skull.

He smiled ruefully. "She did," he confirmed, moving his thumb in small circles on her thigh. "She hit me with her purse." He leaned over to kiss her briefly on the lips. "What the hell do women keep in their purses, anyway? Hers packed a hell of a wallop."

Felicity chuckled. "Well, this is my mother we're talking about, so God only knows."

He shook his head. "It's not just her. I've picked up your purse a couple of times and it's pretty damn heavy, too. I don't get it."

She looked up at him, a small smile causing her dimples to appear. "Well, you have to remember that women's clothes don't have as many pockets as men's," she explained. "So we need our purses for our wallets, keys and phones-"

"And?"

"And our shopping discount cards, makeup, and maybe a bottle of aspirin and some gum-"

"And?"

"And a couple of emergency condoms…you know, in case we meet a really hot guy." Her eyes twinkled mischievously on that last one.

He stopped stroking her thigh. "I assume you're kidding."

She nodded. "I am…now."

He decided he didn't want to hear any more about the condoms and leaned down to kiss her again, longer and more passionately this time. "I have to say," he said a little breathlessly, "that I'm not sorry your mom has gone back to Vegas. In addition to being out of purse-walloping range, it's nice to have the loft to ourselves."

She smiled. "It is. We should take advantage of it, though, because she's coming back in a month or so."

"She is?" Oliver tried not to sound too dismayed.

"Yeah," Felicity sighed, her smile fading. "I made the mistake of telling her about the new youth center in the Glades and how I would be going to the opening as your date – the first time we'll be back together as a couple in public. She decided that was something she wanted to see for herself. Plus, I think she's hoping to reconnect with Mr. Lance."

"Oh." What else could he say?

"Which means," Felicity continued, "that we have about a month to decide how we're going to disabuse her of the whole threesome notion."

"Maybe she'll have forgotten it by then."

She laughed. "Dream on, Oliver."

"I will, but right now I have better things to do." And in one, smooth motion, he pulled her tank top over her head and covered her body with his.