Warning: If drug use offends you, please stop here. While drug use will not be a major part in this story, there will be moments like this chapter and the next that contain this type of material. If drug use offends you, please stop here.
I slept so hard that I didn't hear Rose break in. She woke me straddling me, with a slushy in each hand, after climbing through a window downstairs.
I watched her from atop the kitchen counter, as she poured a few inches of bacardi in each slushy, while I peeled a banana, looking on with sleepy eyes, wondering what positions she'd done it with Briggs in.
I couldn't get the picture of the two of them having sex out of my head.
I even dreamed about it.
I sipped my slushy in the shower while Rose talked on the phone, on the toilet beside me.
I could hear her setting our "stuff" up for tomorrow night at the Drag. She wants us all to go hard at the race tomorrow night. I'm down for it. I'm gonna need it to be around Jake, Edward and Briggs at the same time.
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Yesterday went by in a blur. Not only did we get white girl wasted, but Rose and I dropped acid as well.
After our day on the beach, we rode in Rose's little red Mercedes, around Venice Beach with sun-kissed shoulders and the top down.
With our slushies long gone, we took our time, grabbing drinks, stopping at different shops in between, sharing cotton candy and a I found a cute crocheted top that's soft and revealing and I love it. Rose found a black tank that says 'SAY PERHAPS TO DRUGS' which she immediately put on over her bikini top. She also found these spiky goggles that I thought were atrocious, but she loved them and wore them the rest of the night.
On the way back from Venice, Rose stopped by her guy's house and picked up the stuff for the weekend.
Before leaving, she poured a heart shaped white trail of powder on his table, taking it all in one go. Said it would sober her up for the drive. Not that I was even thinking about the drive back, but in retrospect, I guess that was better than worse.
About twenty minutes into our drive, Rose reached into her pocket and held up a tiny paper square with a mini heart on it. "Open your mouth and stick out your tongue," she smiled, with her finger raised, a tiny square on the tip. I opened and took it on my tongue, before she placed another on her own.
Teeny tiny squares sat on our tongues as we drove— minute by minute dissolving, leaving no taste behind.
The music was up, pouring over us both, as we sped towards San An.
And it felt fucking great until it didn't.
I'd never done acid before, so I had no idea what to expect, but when we were headed down the highway and the yellow and white lines on the sides of that black road started to stack on top of one another, making a wall of lights that we were driving through... I suspected that it had kicked in.
Street lights suddenly glowed neon bright colors, everything became more vivid, more alive and all of my senses were working together at this newly hightened pace that I felt overwhelmed to keep up with... so I immediately tensed up.
While I enjoyed the 3-d vividness of it all visually, and I loved the way the music sounded, how my skin felt, I didn't really like the tension I felt inside. My muscles all contracted together.
Being wide the fuck awake, but drunk as fuck and hallucinating at the same time wasn't a feeling my body was used to.
After we parked in my driveway, It took me at least twenty-five minutes to get the fucking door unlocked because the keyhole wouldn't be still.
Rose even tried it for a few minutes before going around to the window that she'd climbed in earlier.
I didn't even notice she had left, or was already in the house, nor did it compute that I spent twenty minutes trying to get in my house when she was already inside and could have let me in.
She didn't realize it either until I walked in and she saw me. "Holy shit," she said, and we both just started laughing hysterically.
She'd already made a drink.
We were completely fucked out of our minds.
Later on, after Rose helped me relax a little more into it... helping me understand how to think... I finally settled into a more relaxed state.
We ended up making way more noise than we probably should have in the backyard, blowing glow in the dark bubbles all over, chasing them around.
Every time we tried to get on the hammock it was a total fail, so we just lied underneath it instead.
Around 4 am we tried to play Grand Theft Auto, but that was useless, my road kept melting and she could only drive from one side of the road to the other.
We ended up back outside and finally made it into the hammock with three joints and my iPod to share. We finally started to come back down to earth, around nine am.
With the effects of the drug still washing through us, everything still looked pixelated and vividly colored, after sunrise.
Under the sun, my backyard literally looked like Super Mario World.
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.
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The one thing that I couldn't go near last night was the back room at the end of the hall.
That room was alive and I could hear all of its contents breathing. Just reminding me that they're all still there, closed off and ignored.
I felt the scariest pull to that room and every time I made it to the door knob, the fear of the feelings I'd face if I opened the door, kept me from turning that knob.
Now, as I inch my way towards the daylight peeking from under that door, I'm finally facing that silent little alarm going off in my head every hour or so, reminding me that it's still there.
The room filled with contents that seem to be alive and calling to me.
I just want to shut it off.
I don't want to think about it, but it's not quieting. It's not going away.
I don't feel like opening up a fresh wound. I'm just not ready. But the argument within, rages on. My intuition screams that there are things in that room that I need to see.
Things I need to know.
And so I creep slowly towards the door, one foot in front of the other until I'm standing in front of the room full of Charlie's things.
My fingers grip the cold brass knob and as I start to turn it, I hear Rose yelling from one floor above.
I release the knob and quietly walk back towards the stairs.
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When I reach her she's hanging her dripping wet head out of the bathroom door. "You're out of conditioner, got anymore?"
I tell her no and I feel a little bad for using more than I should when I showered before her. I wasn't thinking about it, I was too busy looking at the water cascading down, little tiny rainbows of color still popping through. I loved feeling how the warm water melted over my skin, each drop caressing and massaging my body.
Everything is still so amplified. Colors, sounds, touches.
Feelings.
Fears.
Thoughts.
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We both get dressed and head to the Stop and Spend.
By the time I pull in the parking lot, Rose is passed out in my passenger seat.
I'm starting to feel sleepy as well, being that it's 11 am and we haven't been to bed yet. I'm still hallucinating a little, but I'm not fucked up, so the drive here wasn't bad.
I trail the aisles for things I know I need, grabbing a cheap bottle of conditioner, some Tylenol and a nutty buddy bar.
I hear the door ding as I bend to grab a pack of gum. Towards the end of the aisle I scan over the five hour energy bottles, contemplating whether I should just stay up or go home and crash.
I grab a bottle anyway.
When I turn the aisle, I hear a familiar voice and when I look back, I see a familiar face, but I keep walking, giving him a quick smile over my shoulder as he finishes his conversation with the clerk.
I'm standing at the cold section with the door open, perusing the Coke's, Sprites and Gatorades, trying to decide which one I want, when I feel him behind me.
His finger reaches over my shoulder, drawing a heart into the condensation on the glass door beside me and it makes me smile.
His hand touches my waist, reaching around to my stomach, pulling me back against him and it sets my skin on fire… the remnants of last night's drug still making my senses soar.
His lips touch my ear, and I lay back against him, smiling wide. "Hey, Angel."
"Hi," I smile out to him, turning… wanting to see his pretty eyes.
"I wanna see you tonight, I've missed you." He takes a toothpick from his mouth, bending to kiss my neck, my throat, my heart. It makes my blood pressure pound. It feels good but makes me a little dizzy.
"I'm going to the Drag with Rose tonight." I tell him as he laces my collarbone with one last kiss.
"No shit?"
"Yeah," I giggle at him as he pulls back, studying me… surprised. "No shit." I repeat back.
"That's perfect." He quickly kisses me on the lips, clearly happy about it.
"Come on… let me get this stuff for you." He pulls everything from my hands, puts the toothpick back in his mouth and turns away, taking everything to the clerk at the front, ringing it up and paying for it.
"You didn't have to do that." I say over to him, feeling flattered but a little odd at the same time.
I didn't exactly bet on Jacob Black ringing up my conditioner at the Stop and Spend this morning.
And I hope my pupils still aren't the size of saucers.
He grabs the bag in one hand and my waist in the other, walking me towards the door.
We stop beside my car and I reach for the paper bag he placed on my hood, grabbing the coke out of it.
"So, I'll see you tonight?"
He stands there under his shiny black hair with a toothpick hanging from the corner of his mouth, looking down at me, just waiting on my yes.
Like I'd deny him, but I hesitate for the sake of the game.
I blink a soft nod while stretching a sweet smile at him and watch him back away.
He's got the answer he wants, time's up.
A/N: Full circle, folks, we've reached the prologue (which I won't be repeating for the sake of boring). Check the tumblr blog for updated images for each new chapter :D
Next chapter, we'll see Edward, Jake and Briggs. And it's gonna be messy. Love you all for the continued support and every touching word you leave. Thank you to the moon.