A/N- Heyo, everyone! Nice to see you again :D

I hope you're all doing well and that you enjoyed the previous chapter ^-^

Anyway, I'm fairly certain this is chapter 20 (but who really knows, I messed up the chapter numbers somehow and it's a disaster.). If it is chapter 20; WOOOO it's a milestone! If not, oops. *shrugs*

For everyone whose supported this story so far, you're awesome for putting up with me and I love you for it :3

No excuses this time either, I updated within… six weeks… so I'm good!

(If any of you want to take the initiative to hold me accountable for updating, go for it! Really! PLEASE BUG ME SO I UPDATE.)

Without further ado: Chapter 20 (…I think).

Chapter 20

…WAAYYY Too Freaky

I groaned and rolled over on the couch, my shoulder digging into the plush cushions while I cocooned myself in one of Aunt May's crocheted afghans. Unfortunately, I hadn't been able to sleep so I'd ambled down here to try out the couch instead. Usually when I change my location, I tend to sleep better than in my own bed. But tonight it just didn't seem to be happening. Growling lowly at my inability to succumb to my tiredness, I pried my eyes open and looked around the dark interior of our living room. The lights on the TV glowed dimly across from me and the soft radiance of the lamp posts outside dusted through the windows, but aside from that there was not much to look at. Squeezing my eyes shut, I threw my arm over my forehead and forced myself to lie still. Slowly, ever so slowly, I began to drift off to sleep. Just when I was about to traverse into dreamland, however, the communicator on my wrist buzzed. I yelped and rolled off the couch, my hand over my frantically beating heart as I realized what had happened.

"What the- UGH," I accepted the call and glared weakly at the hologram that sprouted from my wrist, "-don't you ever sleep!?" I demanded, and Fury's eyebrow rose in amusement.

"Rough night?" He asked with a chuckle at my disgruntled form, and I simmered in silence for a moment before collecting myself.

"…Yeah, you could say that." I replied, then muttered under my breath sarcastically. "Not that you don't know already, with all the "security" cameras you have in my house…"

"What was that?" Fury inquired, and I returned my glare to him.

"Nothing. What is it you need?"

He looked as though he might contest my denial, but shook it off and turned his attention to my grumpy self to say, "You've got the late shift right now. Did you forget?"

My eyes grew wide and I grabbed my cell phone off the coffee table, turning it on only to see the blinking alarm for my patrol going off. I'd forgotten to add sound to wake me up, and it was already 15 minutes past 1.

I huffed and brushed the hair out of my eyes, not yet moving from my position on the floor.

"Yes sir, I forgot. Sorry." I looked down at my lap and forced the pout off my face. "I'll get right to it. Thank you for the reminder."

Fury smirked. "Good to hear. Don't forget to be back before four; you have school today."

I glowered and nodded darkly. "Yes sir."

He ended the call and his figure disappeared back into my watch. I blew air between my teeth and lay there for another moment, my messy hair spread out on the floor in unkempt waves.

"Well, this sucks." I thought in self-pity. I let another second pass, took a deep breath, and forced myself to my feet. Moving slowly, I picked up the afghan and folded it neatly, setting it on the back of the couch where I'd originally found it. I then waddled back up to my room and stuffed a few pillows under the covers (my routine for when I have to go out at night) before grabbing my choker off the nightstand. I probably should keep it on me at all times, especially after what happened with Venom, but I'm not really a jewelry person so I forget to put it back on after I shower at night. I donned my super suit and climbed onto the roof though my window with a long, quiet yawn. It was time to get to work.

*R.E*R.E*R.E*R.E*

Time skip :D

*R.E*R.E*R.E*R.E*

The Next Morning:

Sluggishly, I looked up from my locker and over to my cousin. He'd just put his history book back into his locker and was grabbing his poetry text when Luke walked up and started a talking.

"Yo Peter! Did you do the Algebra homework?" He asked in a chipper tone that made my head hurt. 'I mean really, who can be chipper at this time in the morning?!' I thought bitterly, my crusty eyes squinting under the school's florescent lights. Peter rolled his eyes.

"Of course I did." He replied as he slammed his locker shut. Luke slid between him and the locker.

"Can I borrow yours?" He asked with a hopeful grin.

"Borrow it?" Peter echoed blankly. His eyes narrowed and he stuttered a bit at the outrageous inquiry. "Come on, Luke."

"I don't, you know, want to cheat off it!" Luke contested, and I frowned tiredly. 'Sure you don't, slacker.'

"You were supposed to ask him if we could work off his paper." Sam interrupted in exasperation as he appeared with Danny, his hands outstretched towards Luke in a desperate plea for free homework.

"-And he would then say no, because he's the only one of you that has any integrity." I heard Ava say as she approached, but I was disinterested. Not only had I heard it before, I was too tired to listen to her berate them. I trudged towards class, which also happened to be in their direction. It took a lot of effort just to move my feet- one step at a time. I'd managed two steps in the time it took for Peter to say, "Thank you, Ava."

I latched onto him as he walked by and let him drag me along, needing the extra push to get myself out of their way. Even so, I vaguely heard Ava say, "And after spending all day and night training to be the "Ultimate Spiderman", there's no way it's any good."

Peter paused for a moment and I bumped into his back, my senses still moving me forward even though the motion had ceased. He glared back at them and probably would've said something, but since I was hanging off his shoulder and "clearly" too out of it to have heard her, he continued walking.

"It's weird seeing you so tired." He commented as we continued walking. I nodded mutely, my eyes closed in exhaustion. Of course, I couldn't tell him about the EXTREMELY busy patrol I had last night. But I could still tell him the truth.

"Dint gt ani shlep." I murmured, my words muffled by his sleeve.

I could feel his head turn to look down at me in concern, but he didn't say anything and continued to let me drool on his arm. Suddenly, I heard a clash, and Peter stopped walking… so I bumped into him again. Annoyed, I cracked open my eyes and shot them upwards to meet the source of the noise. Eugene.

I heard Peter sigh, and he moved so that he was between me and Flash. I barely registered this, I was so tired. "I need a nap. Move Eugene, I'm gonna sleep in class today…" I thought irritably, hoping my glare would reach the blonde through my cousin's shoulder.

"If it isn't my two favorite Parkers."

"Hi Flash." Peter intoned, and I echoed,

"Her Flish." from behind him.

Probably thinking that I wouldn't try to defend Peter if I was more than half asleep, the living stereotype leaned down toward my cousin and grinned.

"So, what'd your Aunt make you for lunch?"

"Nothing." He replied with a tired smile. "I was going to go to the cafeteria and buy myself something… to…" By that time, he'd noticed Flash's outstretched hand and looked like he wanted to facepalm. He sighed. "I walked right into that one, didn't I?"

"Cu du beh." I announced, and just as I predicted ("Cue the bell") the bell rang to indicate class.

Peter ducked under Flash's arm with a cue from our principal, who was wandering the hall waiting to catch tardy students. I followed Peter and lifted the corners of my mouth weakly at Coulson in greeting as we passed by. Somehow, I ended up sitting at my desk, and before class even began I laid my head on the desk and passed out. Now, I don't make it a habit to sleep during classes. In fact, even with this hero business it's only happened once in my life, so I figured I could be excused for a second time. I was deep in zzzz land by the time Peter, who was sitting in back of the classroom, began to fall asleep himself. I awoke to a yelp. Blearily I looked behind me, only to find my cousin on the ground rubbing his neck while Flash laughed teasingly. I scowled, automatically knowing what had taken place. Flash had a nasty habit of shooting spitballs at people when they fell asleep in this class, which the teacher ALLOWED. I'm not completely sure why; maybe it was just revenge for falling asleep in his class in the first place, or maybe he didn't care. Whatever the case, Peter sprung up looking disoriented and the class began to laugh at his expense. I glared at all of them in defense of my cousin, disappointment gleaming in my eyes. It managed to make a few of them stop laughing. My expression promised harm to their person if they didn't.

I was feeling more aware of my surroundings now that I'd had a short powernap, and for some reason people were giving me the looks you'd give someone with a dangerous temper. I don't know what they're insinuating; I'm the nicest person you'll ever meet :3

"Huh? Huh? Huh?!" Peter shouted, and I returned my attention to him. He was hunched over, fists clenched in confusion and rage. "Where am I?" He demanded, and I felt my eyes widen. "Who are you people?" He glanced at the wall behind him and Ava placed her hand on his arm.

"Peter, are you okay?" She asked. To my utter horror, Peter reared back and growled at her in an animalistic fashion. He then began circling the room, hands held before him to look claw-like and threatening. Still growling, he passed Sam and continued heading to the door.

"Told you he was going to snap one day." Sam told Luke, who was sitting behind him. Luke's eyebrows were raised in a manner that imitated my own expression.

"Mister Parker," The teacher droned in his slow, boring voice as Peter edged out the door, "go wash your face, and try to wake yourself up."

When Peter disappeared into the hallway, I stood up out of my chair and immediately sprinted to the front of the classroom.

"I'm going to go check on him." I said, leaving no room for dispute with my teacher. He nodded at me in mild shock; I don't think he's ever heard me say anything other than the answers to his questions.

With that pseudo consent, I ducked out the door and took off after my cousin, vaguely noticing that I'd left TB in the classroom at the foot of my desk. Oh well, I'll just go back for him later.

"Peter!" I bellowed, my arms and legs pumping to keep up. I saw his form dart around the corner and kept going in his direction, my brain activity beginning to pick up. 'Alright,' I thought while I rounded another corner, 'He just asked who we were, and was wondering where he was. Exhibited animalistic tendencies… this is definitely an episode. Which one comes after Field Trip again? Freaky? And in Freaky he… swaps bodies… with…' I nearly stopped running in my realization. '…Of course. Great. This is just what I need on a Monday morning.' I groaned at the mess this was going to cause and rounded the corner, only to find "Peter" throwing MJ's mirror against the locker. The compact shattered into pieces and MJ took a step back in shock.

"Dude, what is going on with you?!" She asked in annoyance while Harry looked on in concern. I inserted myself between them and shielded her from "Peter's" feral glare with a serious expression.

"Peter is having a mental breakdown right now, we just got some very bad news." I told her flatly, ignoring the growling coming from behind me. "It's a family matter. I'll explain later guys."

With that I grabbed the intruder's shoulder and pulled him away with me. Once we were far enough I leaned in closer so I could whisper into his ear. "I know who you are and what's going on. Be civil just long enough to get out of this mess, okay?"

His posture didn't relax in the slightest, but at least he stopped growling threateningly at me. I heard ringing, and snatched the phone out of his pocket just as he started going crazy searching for it.

"What is that?" He demanded, and I rolled my eyes.

"It's Peter's cell phone. Here." I accepted the call and handed the phone back to him.

"Hello?" There was a pause. "Who is this?!"

I heard a gruff voice freaking out on the other end of the line, and watched crossly as Wolverine switched the phone from one hand to the other. "Switched bodies..?" He echoed, glancing at me in suspicion. "Switched bodies with who?!" A moment later his expression morphed into pure horror.

Before he had a chance to recover from his shock, a loud crashing sound emitted from the speakers of the phone. I heard more frantic sounds from the other end.

"-A bad, bad mutant." Peter-Wolverine-Logan- explained darkly, and I assumed he was answering a question. "He's a blood thirsty maniac who eats anything he doesn't like. And he doesn't like ANYTHING. Get out of there!"

I crossed my arms and tapped my foot impatiently, checking the hallway to make sure everyone was still in class. There was a kid at a water fountain further back, but thankfully I'd dragged Logan far enough away that he didn't spare us a second glance.

"Calm down!" He ordered sternly, and I found myself wishing I could hear Peter's side of the conversation more clearly. I didn't remember exactly what mutant was chasing him, and it was bugging me to no end. "While you're in my body you have my mutant healing power. I'm coming to you!" He grabbed my arm and started walking towards the stairway, then stopped abruptly.

"No!" I heard a panicked yet gruff voice say from the speaker. "Stay put in school. I can't miss class!"

"KID!"

"Stay there!" My cousin insisted in panic. "Don't talk to anybody! Don't touch ANYTHING, and do NOT tell ANYBODY what's going on!" At that last statement, Logan's eyes shot up towards me, and I shrugged. I already knew, so it's not like he could do anything about it. And if Peter found out, I'd deal with it as it happened. That's how these things usually went, to my knowledge. He huffed and made angry gestures with his arms.

"I don't know what's going on! And there is no way I'm staying here. Hello?!"

That must've been the point where the line went silent, because he kept repeating himself angrily into the phone. I snatched it away from him and tucked it back into his pocket as students started flooding the halls.

"Follow me, I'll explain what's going on." I said, extending my hand cautiously.

"Who are you?" He asked, snubbing my outstretched hand but still moving to follow me.

"I'm "your" cousin, Linzy." I informed, the air quotes necessary to get my point across as I walked him towards the principal's office. "I'm not asking you to trust me completely, only long enough for me to get you to Agent Coulson and explain to you both what's going on." Though I said it quietly, the emphasis I placed on "agent" seemed to have peaked his interest.

"Agent Coulson? As in, from...?"

"Yes. Now hush, we're almost there." I'm sure it annoyed him that I told him to hush, but thankfully all he did was growl at me again. I walked him over to the office and knocked on the door before letting myself, and Logan, inside.

"Linzy? Peter? Is something wrong?" Coulson asked in worry, his eyes automatically darting behind us and out the window to see if we'd been causing and/or running from trouble. I softly shut the door behind us and took a deep breath.

"Alright you two, let me start from the beginning. Last night Wolverine and Spiderman were fighting a villain, Mesmero I believe, whose specialty is mind control. Between the time they had been fighting and the time he was captured, he did something to them which would swap their bodies, probably at the cue of them falling asleep at the same time. So yes, Agent Coulson, this is Wolverine in Peter's body. And currently, Peter is in Wolverine's body, running from some mutant whose name I don't know… probably in the direction of the school. I suggest you make sure everyone is in class so he-" I pointed at Logan, "-can suit up and help Peter in the fight. Then we should probably get them to Mesermo so he can fix this."

To his credit, Coulson simply nodded and gave an announcement over the intercom.

"Surprise announcement. Anyone found in the halls during this lunch period will be given four weeks of detention and a call home. That is all."

I nodded my head as he ended the announcement. "Hopefully that'll do it." I turned towards Logan. "You stay here, I'll go get your suit. Do NOT go out there without it, okay?" I ordered, and he rolled his eyes at me. "Coulson, please keep an eye on him." I sighed in exasperation, then exited the room in a jog.

Just as the door closed behind me I heard him say, "Taking commands from a kid now, Coulson?"

Letting out a low growl myself, I turned the corner and ran straight into Luke.

"Oh, sorry. I'm trying to find-" My gaze automatically locked onto the two bags in his arms. "-those! Thanks a ton, Luke!" I grabbed T.B and Peter's backpack out of his hands and ran for it, "I'll explain later!" I yelled over my shoulder.

I burst back into Coulson's office, only to find Logan with half his body out the window and a slightly guilty expression on his face. I sent a disappointed glance in Coulson's direction and he held up his hands placatingly.

"He was, um, really convincing." He said, with a wry smile. Several sharpened pencils were wedged into the leather chair behind his desk. I didn't question it and threw the backpack at the (quote unquote) superhero.

"Get dressed. Peter will be here any second, so keep an eye on the schoolyard. I'm going to head to lunch." I paused my speech momentarily, shifting from foot to foot. "Oh, and uh, don't mention this to Peter, please. He doesn't exactly know I'm helping him out all the time."

His eyebrows rose as he hopped down from the window sill.

"You mean, he doesn't know… you know?"

I nodded.

"So, don't mention it. If you do I'll-"

He smirked and crossed his arms. "-You'll do what, exactly?"

My eyes narrowed. "I'll use every trick in the book to bug you for the rest of your life."

"And I'll see to it that she gets your address." Coulson added with a serious nod, and I almost laughed at his willingness to help me annoy Wolverine. Logan paled slightly, and I let myself out while giggling evilly under my breath for effect.

"Alright, now that that's out of the way it's time to clean up the aftermath of Logan's tirade. Everyone should be in the lunchroom right about now so that should be easy, right?" I straitened my posture and slung T.B over my shoulder as I hurried in the direction of the lunch room, trying to ignore the sounds of battle before they began to recede behind me. "Here's hoping Logan doesn't hate me enough to tell Peter I know his secret!"

With that cheery thought, I entered the cafeteria and immediately felt the eyes of our lunch table glue themselves to my face.

"H-hey guys." I greeted guardedly as I walked up and gingerly took a seat at our plastic lunch table.

"Alright Linzy, spill. What's going on with Peter?" Ava asked as MJ chimed in, "-And what's that "family matter" you were talking about? Is everything okay?"

They all leaned in close to me, and I noticed that they had somehow given me the chair in the dead center of the table without me noticing. I gulped; I was trapped. Better make this good!

"First off, he's okay. I'm going to keep trying to talk some sense into him, but it'd be best if you guys wait until at least tomorrow before you try to talk to him. And it was a family matter, and while you guys are pretty much family to us, I think it'd be better if he told you himself once he's feeling more like himself." I said honestly. I'd considered spouting some lies about a dying pen pal or something, but I figured that would be a little too much to cover up later on. They seemed a little disappointed in my answer. "What? Were you expecting juicy gossip or something? Just be patient, I'm sure he'll tell it better than me anyway. Give him some time." With that I took a sandwich from Sam's plate and took a bite. "Mm. Ham and cheese. Good choice, Sam."

"Hey! That's MY lunch!"

Luke shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. "And what are you going to do about it?" He asked with an entertained expression. "Take it back from her?"

Sam pouted and looked down at his plate.

"Thanks Luke!" I said appreciatively, then took his pudding cup and set it down in front of me.

"HEY! That's my PUDDING!" He reached for it but I was faster than him. I encircled it with my arms as I continued munching on Sam's sandwich with a small smirk. Misdirection and distraction has been achieved. Linzy:1, Friends: 0.

"What'cha gonna do about it, big guy?" Sam mocked. I continued eating blissfully and the rest of our friends looked on as their argument continued back and forth until I was no longer in the line of fire.

"…Remind me not to make you angry." Ava commented as she watched them, her own lunch already finished and the trash thrown away. "You can be manipulative when you want to be."

I smiled innocently and peeled back the lid of the pudding cup.

"I have no idea what you're talking about!" I replied cheerfully as I took Danny's unused spoon and set to eating the semi-delicious treat. School pudding wasn't the best, but it'd do. She eyed me warily and shared a look with MJ, which I noticed, but didn't comment on. The only ones who looked amused were Harry and Danny. They weren't laughing aloud or anything, but both smiled at me and seemed to be enjoying the argument progressing between Luke and Sam more than everyone else. Deciding not to dwell on it, I finished the borrowed lunch and excused myself from the table. I walked to the lunch line and purchased another lunch, this one with two sandwiches and two pudding cups. I'm a nice person, I just needed to mess with them to distract them. And from the looks of it, it had worked perfectly. I set the tray down in front of Sam and pushed the pudding towards Luke, who looked up at me in surprise.

"What? You didn't really think I'd just leave you without food, did you?" I asked in disbelief. They didn't even question it and started digging in like they hadn't eaten in weeks. I closed my eyes and put my head down on the table. Hopefully leaving Peter to the explanations wouldn't cause him too many problems…

R.E*R.E*R.E*R.E

A/N-

And everyone gets their happy ending for the episode!

Wooo- pudding!

Yeah.

So anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter!

It was a lot shorter than the last one but I think it turned out okay, I had fun figuring out how the interaction between Linzy and Wolverine would go.

(Also, for those of you following my Firebreather story, the next chapter is under construction :D)

SERIOUSLY, bug me with reviews and pm's so I'll update faster!

-R.E