James started to regret returning to Hogwarts before being fully healed as soon as he realized how many staircases he would have to climb on a daily basis. He had just eaten dinner on his first day back and was slowly making his way up to the hospital wing with Sirius hovering at his side. James had been in a foul mood all day. Despite the potions, he was still feeling very weak and like always when he was feeling sick, he became very irritable. It did not help that most students seemed very interested in his run in with the Death Eater. James had lost count of the people who had tried to wheedle information about that fateful night from him. Only when he had whipped out his wand and threatened to curse the next one messing in his business, he had been left alone. Well, almost alone, as Sirius had taken James's father's words to heart and wasn't leaving him out of his sight. Marlene had looked very worried as well, so James assumed that he would have to deal with her scrutiny as well.

'I need a moment,' he panted to Sirius and sank to the floor next to a barrier. His heart was pumping very fast and he could feel sweat soaking into his undershirt. To make matters worse, he still had two flights of stairs to cross. He had clearly overestimate his strength.

'Take your time mate,' said Sirius, who looked worried. 'Are you sure you are alright? I did not expect you to be that weak.'

'I am fine,' said James through clenched teeth.

'Of course you are,' said Sirius lightly, though James could tell that he did not believe him. Sirius was probably just saving his breath. James could be very stubborn when he wanted to be and he was not going to return to St. Mungo's unless Madame Pomfrey made him. He hated hospitals and he was not going to give these Death Eaters bastards the satisfaction. He was going to be alright soon.

'Let's move,' said James, after his breathing had returned to normal. 'Pomfrey is probably already waiting for me. She was told to expect me after dinner.'

'Then we should not keeping her waiting much longer,' said Sirius. He grabbed James's hand and pulled him to his feet. James swayed for a moment, but then stabilized. Determined, he started climbing more stairs. Sirius stayed at his sight, ready to catch him should he stumble. On the one hand, James was touched by his best mate's diligent care for him on the other hand he was starting to get annoyed. He was neither a child nor on his death bed. He could get to the hospital wing just fine on his own. Nevertheless, he chose not to start an argument with Sirius about this. He just did not have the strength to argue right now. They had just reached the corridor leading to their destination, when a voice called out to them.

'Sirius, James, wait up!'

James turned around and spotted Amber jogging towards them. Her cheeks were slightly pink from the effort and her long blonde curls swayed behind her. She looked very pretty, but James was not too pleased about seeing her. He just wanted to get his potions and go to bed.

'Amber,' said Sirius with a smile on his face. 'Always a pleasure.'

'Hey,' she said, after she had reached them. 'Sirius, I don't want to be rude, but can you give James and me some time alone?'

'Of course,' said Sirius, before James could say anything. 'Just make sure to deliver him to the hospital wing after you are down. Pomfrey will be waiting for him. Prongs, I will be waiting in Gryffindor Tower for you. Don't do anything I would not do.'

He walked away after shooting a lecherous grin at James. James cursed inwardly. He had hoped that Sirius would chase Amber away and just get him to the Hospital Wing, but apparently, he could not rely on his best mate. Before he could come up with anything to say to Amber, she had closed the distance between and pulled him into a tight hug.

'I am so glad that you are okay,' she said. 'I have read the Daily Prophet. You were so brave to fight the Death Eaters, Jamie!'

'Thanks,' said James quietly. He hugged her back and felt his displeasure at her presence vanish. 'I am still undecided whether it was very stupid or very brave.'

She laughed, before pulling out of the embrace and looking at him critically.

'Are you alright?' she asked. 'You look rather pale and look feverish. Should we talk some other time and get you to the Hospital Wing instead?'

'It's fine,' said James. 'I am just a bit weak, as I am still healing. I did not see you at dinner. Where have you been?'

'Oh, I was in the kitchens,' said Amber, who was still looking at him. Apparently, she was not convinced that he was truly fine. James could not blame her. He was exhausted, but he did not want her pity.

'I needed some time to think and did not feel up to eating in the great hall,' she continued.

'That's not surprising,' said James. 'I was told that you have sent invitations to your wedding. Did people bother you about it?'

'Some were rather surprised, but it is nothing I can handle,' she said drawing herself up to her full height. 'I am hardly sensitive. I have something to tell you, though.'

'I have expected as much,' said James. 'I guess that is the end then. With people knowing that you are going to get married to another man, we can hardly continue our relationship. It is okay, I have had time to...'

Amber pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him. James looked at her quizzically.

'That is not what I wanted to tell you,' she said. 'I have talked about our relationship with Peter over the holidays.'

'You have?' said James, surprised. He had assumed that her fiancé did not appreciate the fact that his wife had a boyfriend at school. 'Is he going to come here and challenge me to a duel? I am not quite up to that yet.'

'Don't be silly,' said Amber, rolling her eyes. 'Peter took it remarkably well. He did not seem to be overly surprised. He told me that he did not mind. After all, he had known all along that he was not going to marry a virgin. Also, he is a few years older and already had his fun with various girls, so he thinks it is only fair that I get to enjoy the rest of the school year with you. After that it will only be him and me, but before anything goes. He also has a girlfriend on the side.'

'Wow,' said James. 'I never would have expected that. How do you feel about that? I probably wouldn't be thrilled if I was in his position.'

'Well, it seems rather fair, doesn't it?' said Amber. 'If I am allowed to have you, why shouldn't Peter be allowed to have some fun as well? I am not sure that it is a good sign for our marriage, but we will see that as we go along. After all, we have more than enough time to make it work.'

'I suppose that's true,' said James. He was not convinced though. In his opinion, it was a terrible sign that both Fawley and Amber were having sex with other people so close to their marriage. He did not point that out though. Amber and he had already talked about that situation quite often and she had made her point of view clear: She was a pure-blood witch and therefore had to deal with being in an arranged marriage. James still was impressed by her rather cold acceptance of the situation, but he supposed that it was her way of dealing with it. He was not going to push her. It would do him no good to shatter her coping mechanism.

'It is,' said Amber. She stepped close to him and softly kissed him on the lips. 'That means that we have some more time to enjoy each other's company. Naturally, we have to stop once the train back reaches London, but I will take what I can get. You are not disappointed that I did not invite you to the wedding, are you? I briefly contemplated doing it, but I did not want to rub it into Peter's face.'

James snorted.

'That's perfectly alright,' said James. 'I am not that masochistic that I want to see you married off to another man.'

'Good,' said Amber. She leaned in again and kissed him again. James kisser her back even though he knew it was a mistake. Their borrowed time was running out and instead of making a clean cut, he was still clinging to her. Things would only get harder the longer it went on, especially because they now probably would be under much closer observation than before. But he was too weak. He could not do it. He liked to believe that he did not want to break up with Amber because it would make her unhappy and that he was being noble in allowing her some escape for her last weeks at school. It was a lie of course. He was doing it for himself. It felt so good to have an easy and more or less working relationship after having been rejected by Lily so many times that he was unwilling to give it up. It was foolish and he would probably regret it in the future, but that was the way it was.

James felt a little light-headed when they stopped kissing. He was not sure whether it was caused by his lingering injuries or by their activities. Amber took another look at him and could see a sliver of concern in her eyes.

'You look awfully, pale,' she said. 'Come one, I am going to get you to the hospital wing.'

He did not protest. He was feeling weak after all, maybe it was for the best that he had got to the hospital wing soon. He was not exactly looking forward to be lectured by Pomfrey, but it would be foolish not to get treatment when he needed it. They slowly walked the rest of the way. Amber kept glancing at him as if she expected him to collapse any moment. James wondered if he really looked that weak or if she was only fussing over him.

When they entered, Pomfrey was already waiting for them.

'Finally,' she snapped. 'Sit down Potter, I have expected you half an hour ago!'

'It was my fault madam,' said Amber. 'I am struggling with N.E.W.T.-level transfiguration and roped James into explaining some of the finer points to me. I did not know that he was supposed to meet you.'

'It is fine, Marchbanks,' said Pomfrey and she seemed to be a bit mollified. James shot Amber a grateful look and sat down heavily in the nearest hospital bed.

'I am going to leave,' said Amber after Pomfrey shot her a pointed look. 'Get well soon, James.'

She left him alone with Pomfrey who immediately began casting all kind of diagnostic spells on him. She made a disapproving sound when she saw the results.

'You are still very weak,' she said. 'The nerve damage is healing, but it will take time for you to get up to your normal level again. And you have to rest, Potter. You did not do anything but ride the train and eat dinner today and still you are pale as a sheet and obviously exhausted. I think it was a mistake for you to return to school that early. Are you sure that you don't want to return to St. Mungo's?'

'I am,' said James. 'I am sure that I am going to get better care here.'

'Don't be ridiculous,' said Pomfrey, but James could tell that she was flattered. 'Well, in any way, you are not fit to go to lessons for at least the rest of the week. And you should stay here, so I can easily keep an eye on you.'

'Is this really necessary?' asked James. He hated staying in the hospital wing. 'I think I would be better off staying my dorm. I prefer to spend the night in my bed.'

'We will see,' said Madame Pomfrey. She rummage around in a cabinet and extracted three vials of potions. 'Here, drink all of these. I am going to take a look at your vitals again, when the potions have done their job.'

James only recognized one of the potions - it was a strengthening solution -, but he did not even want to know what exactly he was supposed to drink. He trusted Pomfrey to take good care of him, so he just uncorked the first vial and with a sigh, downed it a fast as he could. Pomfrey paid close attention to him, as if she wanted to make sure that he took his medicine like a good boy. James felt a spike of irritation, but decided to ignore her. He drank the other two potions and conjured himself a glass of water to wash away the bad taste in his mouth. The potions worked quickly: He felt heat spread in his body, up to his toes and fingertips. Also, he felt a bit stronger than before and the room seemed to come in sharper focus.

'Hm...' said Pomfrey, eyeing him critically. 'Well, you look a bit better, but I am still rather worried. Let's take another look.'

She cast a plethora of diagnostic spells on him, even more than she had before. James could tell by the stern expression on her face that the results were not great.

'Well, it is as I have feared,' she said. 'You are definitely going to have to rest for the rest of the week. And I am going to keep you here in the hospital wing. Your nerves were badly damaged by the Cruciatus and I will have to monitor the healing process closely.'

'But, surely I am old enough to take...'

'Not a word, Potter,' she said sternly. 'I have treated you enough during the past years to know that you are a terrible patient. You don't have the necessary patience to give your body the rest it needs. You are going to stay here until I am satisfied with your healing. Arguing about it will only waste our time.'

James knew a lost cause if he saw one. Maybe she even had a point. He tended to get bored extremely quickly whenever he was sick. He probably would do something overly taxing after a day or two in bed. So, with a heavy sigh, he accepted his fate and sank down on the bed he was sitting on. It was going to be a long week.

To James's joy, he was getting better faster than Pomfrey had anticipated. So, on Wednesday afternoon, she decided that he was well enough to get back to his dorm. She still expected to see him twice a day for his potions and he was not allowed to go to classes, but she was pleased with his progress nevertheless. James also suspected that she was just fed up with his complaining. He really was a lousy patient. He bade her goodbye and started the track back to the common room. He was feeling a lot stronger than he had felt just a few days before. His legs still were heavy and felt a bit unsteady, but at least he could climb a staircase without being soaked in sweat afterwards. He hoped that he would have his whole strength back soon. He was itching to get back on his broom and to start Quidditch training again. The final match of the season against Slytherin was going to be in a month and it would decide the victor of the Quidditch cup. He was determined to win it. It was his first season as a captain after all and he could imagine nothing better than crowning it with the cup. However, getting back on his broom would have wait for a few more days. His left arm was still a bit stiff and it was too risky to strain it already. He would have to take baby steps, but at least things were getting better. When he arrived back in the common room, it was almost completely empty. The last lessons of the day were still ongoing and only students with a free period were free to sit in the common room. James spotted Lily sitting close to the fire immediately after entering. She was busy with what looked like an ancient rune translation, but had looked up when the portrait hole had opened and spotted him. A brilliant smile took other her face.

'You are back!' she said, causing the rest of the common room to notice him as well. James waved at all of them and made his way over to her. He sank down in the seat opposite of her.

'So, I am,' he said. 'A bit worse for wear, but it is going to be alright.'

'How are you?' she asked with a worried expression on her face. 'Marlene told me that you were in the hospital wing, but she did not know what exactly was wrong with you.'

'I am fine,' said James, but corrected himself, when she gave him a dark look. 'Alright, I am still feeling a bit weak, but I am getting better.'

'Is this still related to the Death Eater attack?' asked Lily. 'I have heard that you were in St. Mungo's.'

'Yeah, I was,' said James, after casting a quick Muffliato Charm for privacy. 'But I asked them to let me go early. I thought that I was already mostly healed. Maybe that was a mistake. The bastards got me worse than I had anticipated.'

'Is it true that you were placed under the Cruciatus?' asked Lily. 'The Prophet said you were, but I am not sure how reliable they are.'

'The Prophet got it right,' said James quietly. 'I duelled a Death Eater during the attack. I lost. The Cruciatus was the last spell he cast on me before he fled with the rest of the bastards.'

'James that is horrible!' said Lily, looking shocked. 'I have always known that the Death Eaters were monsters, but I never thought that they would attack a pure-blood like you!'

'Apparently, they don't care so much about blood purity as they claim,' said James. 'Remember, most Death Eaters consider my family to be blood traitors.'

'Why?' asked Lily. 'I know that your family is not dark or traditional, but that does not seem to be enough for them to want to kill you. I mean, you are as pure-blood as they come! Shouldn't they just consider you neutral?'

'Well, you have to understand that in the pure-blood community, grudges take a long time to be forgotten,' said James. 'Every family has a reputation which was formed over the century and these are rarely reconsidered. My family is considered muggle-friendly because my grandfather, Henry Potter, who was once member of the wizengamot, attack the Minister of Magic of that time because he had forbidden the wizarding community from aiding Muggles during the First World War. Many purists were furious about my grandfather's open support for Muggles. In their opinion, it is treason not to aggressively defend your blood. Therefore, the name Potter does not carry much weight in some pure-blood circles.'

'Wow,' said Lily. 'Your grandfather did the right thing. Is he still alive?'

'No,' said James. 'He died before I was born. My father told me that my grandfather was a good man, willing to stand up for his ideals. However, sometimes I am not sure that this a compliment, coming from my father.'

'Why is that?' asked Lily.

'My father is a very cunning and calculating man,' said James. 'He was an auror for a long time and developed an excellent sense for people during his time. He is good at reading people as well as getting them to do what he wants. He learned not to show what he was truly feeling if it wasn't necessary and he did not like how open his father was. Standing in for your beliefs is rarely a good idea in the power struggle most pure-bloods participate in.'

'I see,' said Lily. She looked thoughtful for a moment. 'Was your father a Gryffindor as well?'

'He was,' said James. 'But he told me that the Sorting Hat considered putting him into Slytherin. I think that even within a house there is a huge variety of characters. Just because you are sorted into a house the most does not mean that you don't share some habits of other houses. Look at Sirius for example: He is a Gryffindor in his heart, but from his upbringing he would neatly fit into Slytherin as well.'

'I think it is interesting that you are so different from your father,' said Lily.

'How can you say that?' asked James. 'You barely know him.'

'True,' said Lily. 'Nevertheless, I have paid close attention to him and to what you just told me. I know you well enough, James, to know that you don't mask your beliefs. You would never pretend to support a belief just because it would be convenient. Look at the raid on the fundraiser: You could have easily hid yourself and waited for it to pass. It probably would have been the smart thing to do, but you acted on your beliefs and fought back. That was incredibly brave.'

'Maybe, but it was also rather dumb,' he said, echoing his statement to Amber from two days ago. 'I got cursed with an Unforgivable for nothing. And I don't know what they wrote in the Prophet, but I did not decide to fight the Death Eaters, because I wanted to stand in for my beliefs. I wanted to make sure my parents were alright and ended up in a duel within minutes. I was not trying to be a hero.'

'It does not matter why you did it, just that you did,' said Lily sagely. 'Most people would lack the courage you showed that day. I think if more pure-bloods were like you, the wizarding world would be a much better place.'

James was speechless for moment. He could not believe that Lily Evans of all people had just paid him such a compliment. After all, mere months ago, she had accused him of being just like the blood purists. He must be doing something right, after all. He wondered what Lily would think if she knew his father's plans to blur the line between them and the Lord Voldemort supporters to keep their family save. He did not think that she would be impressed.

'Thanks,' he said quietly, suppressing the need to make a funny remark. He did not think that it would be appreciated. 'Things have gotten seriously out of hand. The attack on the fundraiser was daring even for the Death Eaters.'

'I like to believe that it is going to become better, but I doubt it,' said Lily, looking worried. 'The Ministry has announced tighter security measures and wants to hire more aurors. At least they are starting to take things seriously, but they have not exactly been very effective in the past. I doubt that this will be over when we graduate.'

'Probably not,' said James. 'I hate that there is nothing we can do to help. The duel with the Death Eater showed me how much more powerful they are than us. Even Sirius scolded me for picking a fight with such an opponent if you can believe it.'

'Well, then he is not as foolish as I thought,' said Lily. 'I believe Black that he wants to fight against the Dark Arts, but a schoolboy is not equipped to fight against murderers. We have to leave it to the aurors and then see what we can do when we graduate. Maybe we will join the auror squad ourselves one day.'

'Would you like to become an auror?' asked James.

'I am not sure,' said Lily. 'My current plan is to become a healer, but with things being as they are, maybe I will join the auror department. Someone has to stand up for Muggleborns and if we don't do it ourselves, who is going to do it? But I am not sure if I am made for duelling people.'

'Well, you have hexed me quite some times in the past,' said James.

'That's different,' said Lily, who looked a bit pink in the face. 'We are talking about duels to the death here. That is something else entirely. What about you? Your father was an auror after all.'

'He was,' said James. 'He would like me to continue the family tradition and become an auror. I have toyed with the thought. Like you, I want to fight back. But it has been my childhood dream to become a professional Quidditch player. I have the talent and I am not sure that I am ready to give up that dream.'

'I see,' said Lily. 'Well, we will just have to see what life takes us.'

Silence spread between them and after a few minutes, James decided to get up to his dorm to rest a bit before dinner. He bade goodbye to Lily and walked up the stairs, feeling much better than he had when he had returned to Hogwarts. Despite his injuries it was good to be back.