*National Geographic Logo appears on the screen*
Narrator begins opening sequence:
On this episode of National Geographic, we will be observing the untamed author and xer wild muse companion in their natural habitat. As we can observe, the untamed author sits down to write with fervent focus, a plethora of prewritten outlines, snippets of story, and the aid of xer faithful muse. The author tells xer muse xe is very determined to complete at least two chapter of xer latest magnum opus before the end of the month. The muse nods and the two bosom companions begin their trek through the wilds of Scripsit a' Capite.
Oh, but what is this?! The wild muse has spotted a small warren of plotbunnies munching from a nearby bush of distraction-berries and has gone to sniff them over. The muse seems enamored with the smallest of the bunch and picks it up gently to take to its master. The untamed author examines the offering critically, but as the plotbunny just so happens to fit into the prewritten outline xe accepts it. The untamed author reminds the wild muse that they need to stay on task if the chapter is to be done on time and the muse puts its nose firmly to the ground in search of the next piece of the Treasure of the Dialogians.
The faithful twosome makes its way deeper into the dark forest of Plot and are evermore successful in their quest. Until, in a fateful twist of events, they stumble across an enormous herd of ravenous plotbunnies devouring a small village of fanfiction writers. The untamed author hides in the bushes and laments the enslavement of so many of xer peers, but thanks the heavens that xey xemselves were not caught.
Unfortunately, the untamed author has been betrayed by xer muse! The wild muse did not hide, it leapt into the middle of the ravenous plotbunnies and is now cavorting through them, calling them to itself with a siren song. The plotbunnies bow to their new leadership and its promises of writing fulfilment. The delighted muse leads its new friends back to its horrified master and strops its back against xer legs, sure that the untamed author will be pleased with so many new stories to write.
The untamed author rebukes xer muse with firm statements about deadlines and no room for useless side plots. The untamed author expects that this will be enough and that the wild muse will give up its new friends to focus on the proper story once more. The division between the two has been made complete however, as the wild muse declares its Kingship over the ravenous plotbunnies and bounds away to establish a kingdom of anarchic half-finished stories and unresolved cliffhangers.
Tune in next episode to see how the untamed author deals with this abandonment by xer bosom companion.
*Credits Roll*
Service Announcement: This episode brought to you in part by United Authors Against Unfinished Stories; The International Muse Ownership Society; and the Reviewers for Fan Literature Association.
Commercial for the next episode:
The untamed author has found an army of Cat-Riders and descends upon the nascent kingdom of the wayward wild muse.
Service Announcement:
Special thanks goes to Canikostar99 for the loan of the Bumblebee, Arcee, and Prowl Cat-Back Riders for episode 2.
In all seriousness, I will have a chapter up soon, even if it kills me. Hopefully y'all enjoyed this little piece of the thoughts that have been going through my head while I was trying to write, despite having the walking flu and its derivatives for like 6 weeks. Yuck! And good health to every one of my readers, because from what I hear the flu, walking flu, and pneumonia are really widespread this year.