(Mal)

Green eyes failed to tear from the brown door despite the presence of someone else in the room, her mind unable to focus on anything other than the everlasting internal debate of whether or not the blue-haired girl would return. Her mind told her she wouldn't, but her heart told her she would. It was a constant battle in her mind unless she was focused on the words coming cautiously from other's lips, and right now no one spoke, so it was a painfully repetitive loop. She's not coming back, she doesn't care about you; Yes, she is coming back, she skipped three days of classes for me; Stop being foolish, it's a trick; She's not that type of person.

For the first three days after she woke Mal hadn't gotten more than five minutes without Evie, the blue-haired girl having stayed by her bed constantly, only leaving to bathe and find food, which she always managed to do more quickly than Mal would have ever imagined possible. However, both of them knew they would have to return to school sooner, or later, and it was no surprise that Evie hadn't been granted the lengthy break that Mal had, and though she wasn't alone she just couldn't help but wait for the girl's return.

Every inch of muscle inside her body itched, and she wasn't entirely sure why, but she knew there was nothing she could do about it, well aware that she couldn't get out of bed. She felt she was too weak to move around, the way everyone constantly coddled her letting her know that she couldn't do anything for herself; though she hadn't needed much help believing that. There was always someone with her, and whenever she needed something they told her to remain in bed and received it for her without hesitation, seemingly aware of her general inability.

Only when the bed sank with added weight did Mal finally manage to tear her gaze from the unmoving door in order to find a freckled face. She offered the boy a small smile as he nudged her leg lightly.

"Are you tired of sleeping, yet?" Carlos questioned, returning the smile without a second thought.

"I… I don't know," Mal answered honestly, unsure what to think. "Should I be?"

"Well, I mean, you did spend just about the entire weekend sleeping, and since then you've spent a good amount of time sleeping through the day," Carlos announced, voice holding zero judgement.

"Just about?" Mal questioned, finding herself curious as to what the boy meant. To her knowledge, she had slept through the entire weekend.

"Yeah, you woke a few times over the weekend, but you were so panicked that Belle had to drug you so you'd fall back to sleep," Carlos explained, shifting a bit closer to her on the bed, his brown eyes never leaving the green of hers. "Each time you woke, you seemed to be somewhere else. Monday was the first time you actually saw us."

"Oh," Mal breathed out, not sure what else she could say in response.

There was something different about the way Carlos spoke to her, his voice less soft, less worried, less coddling. He wasn't side-stepping cautiously around her like everyone else did when they spoke to her, and it was almost as if he was speaking to someone else, to someone who wasn't confined to a bed every day.

"Are you ever going to take a shower?" Carlos questioned casually.

Mal glanced toward the bathroom door. "A shower?"

"Yeah, I'm sure you've heard of them," Carlos replied, the glint in his eyes entirely playful, his knee bumping lightly into Mal's hip. "I mean; you definitely need one."

It was tempting to push the boy off the bed, but the fact that she hadn't showered since the night her and Evie had gotten into an argument made her realize he was right. She glanced over at the bathroom again, analyzing the exact distance.

"Come on, surely you don't want to stay in bed for the rest of your life," Carlos continued, seemingly realizing she wasn't about to answer verbally. "And even if you did want to do that, don't you think you should at least freshen up a bit? You know, for Evie."

Carlos teasingly nudged her again, and this time she did shove him off the bed, bringing her foot up until she could push it into the boy's side until he slipped from the mattress and found the floor. Two different laughs sounded through the room, but Mal quickly found hers fading when she remembered something. She remembered an idea that had affected her despite her attempts to remain neutral, her confusion with the feelings that accompanied it making her fear the answer she'd get if she asked the question craving liberty from her tongue.

"Are you two together?"

Carlos' laugh died as well, and he brought his elbow to rest on the edge of her bed as he met her gaze. "No, we're not. We're just friends."

"You went to the dance together," Mal was unsure why she felt the need to point that out.

"As friends," Carlos pulled himself back up until he was sitting beside her again. "We went together because neither of us had anyone we liked as more than a friend. Well, no one that was available when she asked."

The ending of his explanation caught Mal's attention, but she couldn't bring herself to ask what he meant, so instead she averted her gaze, her fingers beginning to manipulate the sheet covering her body. Without thinking about what she was doing, she tossed the sheet from her body and quickly got to her feet, having grown uncomfortable with the path the conversation had taken.

"I'm going to take that shower, now," Mal stated, completely forgetting the items she would need as she hurried into the bathroom, closing the door behind her and leaning against it.

It didn't register to her that she was on her feet for the first time since last Friday until she found her reflection staring at her. Her purple hair was a great deal messier than usual and her eyes were a dull green. However, she hadn't needed to look at herself to know what Carlos meant by saying she needed a shower; both the smell lingering in the air around her and the way her clothes stuck to her uncomfortably in certain areas making the necessity of bathing perfectly clear. Still, she stood against the door for a lingering moment, the boy's answer still sinking in. We're just friends. She didn't know why that made her heart feel lighter, especially considering she knew the two deserved nothing less than each other.

Not wishing to look at herself in the mirror she moved over to the small cabinet bolted into the wall, pulling a clean towel from the bottom shelf and slinging it over the bar just outside the tub before reaching down to turn the red knob. Peeling the clothes from her body she stepped into the tub, shutting the curtain completely as she stepped into the scalding water, a sigh of content slipping passed her lips as the water quickly soaked her, the heat helping her muscles relax. She took her time washing and shaving, feeling as though she desperately needed it, and once she was finished – even though she knew she had already taken long enough – she found herself standing under cascading water, her hands extended in front of her.

She slid her gaze over the disturbingly scarred skin of her wrists, reminding herself to make sure she didn't leave the bathroom without pulling her gloves back on, the accessory having been designed to cover every inch of her burned wrists with the added material. It was why she had never gone anywhere in Auradon without her gloves, why she hadn't let the infirmary woman remove them despite her attempts to slide them off. Bringing her hand to her ribcage she dropped her gaze, watching her fingertips dance over the ruined skin there. She was positive both the woman and Carlos had seen the large, too-even scar, along with the thick, raised skin traveling from the top of the burn scar to her collarbone; and she was confused as to why neither of them had asked any questions. In the infirmary, she had also worried about Evie seeing the scars on her front, but had been lucky that the girl had failed to notice due to the effect of her more recent wound. When she twisted her arm to feel the thick scars on her back she found her emotions overwhelming her, and so she quickly shut the water off, wanting to busy herself with something else before she allowed herself to be consumed.

Her breathing quickened as she dried herself off, her mind barreling down on her once again, telling her that she deserved every scar she possessed. She shook her head frantically, sinking down onto the bathroom floor as she slid her fingers into her wet hair, tucking her head between her knees and failing to rid herself of the thoughts. When a light knock sounded through the room she found a heavy breath leaving her lips, and she allowed her weakened state to present itself as she spoke, her voice cracking with each quiet word she breathed.

"Do you need something?"

"No," Carlos' voice floated through the door, softer than before. "I was just… Do you need anything?"

Mal almost told him that she didn't. "Yeah. I forgot clothes."

"Okay, anything in particular you want me to get?" Carlos questioned, not seeming uncomfortable with the situation.

"You'll only find one shirt out there. Same goes for the pants," Mal stated, forcing herself back to her feet, finding them less stable than before. "Anything for underneath will be fine."

She didn't get a response, and she figured he had moved away from the door to collect her things, so she moved over to the sink, bracing her hands on the marble countertop as she inhaled deeply. You've got to get a hold of yourself, no one wants to watch you constantly laying around helplessly. Finally, she lifted her gaze so that she could look into her own reddened eyes. You have to pretend for them. Let them know that they can go back to their lives. Let them know they can stop pretending as well.

"I've got your clothes," Carlos called through the door.

"Just put them on the floor," Mal returned. "Thank you."

The sound of the door opening didn't slip her notice, but she didn't turn to grab her clothes, even when she knew he was gone; she couldn't bring herself to look away from the mirror. She couldn't tear her gaze from the pale girl staring at her from the other side of the mirror because she was desperately searching for something good about her, something she knew she'd never find.

She slammed her hands down onto the counter forcefully. "Fucking disappointment."

A painful ringing traveled through her bones until it stopped in her elbows, leaving the lower half of her arms and her hands to tingle unpleasantly. Now unable to look at herself any longer due to the disgust she felt when studying those green eyes and sharp features, she turned her back to the mirror, moving over to retrieve the clothes Carlos had left for her. Surprisingly, Carlos didn't ask her if she was okay; the only thing she could hear was her own taunting mind as she quickly dressed herself. Before she left the bathroom, she made sure every scar was covered, pulling on her leather gloves to finish the job.

"You have a thing for zippers," Carlos stated once she had appeared from the steam-filled bathroom.

Mal didn't respond with anything other than a small nod as she fell back onto the mattress, this time on her stomach with her hands resting under her chin. It wasn't a surprise when he sat down next to her, but she nearly flinched when a warm hand came to rest on the small of her back. As much as she knew she should shove his hand away she just couldn't bring herself to do it, the warmth of his large hand calming and comforting.

Her silence didn't seem to discourage him. "You wanna know what I like?"

"What?" She breathed out quietly.

"There's this game called tourney, it's kind of a confusing mix of rules, but it's really fun," Carlos explained, and Mal shifted her head so she could raise her eyebrow in question at him. He laughed. "What?"

"Nothing," Mal shook her head, allowing her eyelids to drop over her eyes.

She nearly choked when the boy spoke again.

"We should go play."

As she coughed a few times, his thumb rubbed gently into her back. Before she could roll onto her side to face him, Carlos had moved so he was lying beside her, mirroring her position almost perfectly, the only difference being that his head was shifted in the opposite direction so they could look at each other.

"Come on," Carlos urged, an almost timid smile quirking the corners of his mouth. "I promise it's not nearly as bad as it initially sounds. I can teach you the rules."

"You think I'd be able to play this game?" Mal questioned, not entirely sure she could do anything other than simple, every day things.

"Yeah! I think you'd be great if you got some practice!" Carlos exclaimed, clearly wanting to convince her.

And for some reason, she let him. She figured getting out of the room couldn't be too bad of an idea, though she found her heartbeat accelerating in fear with the thought.

Still, she found herself saying, "Sure, why not, kid."

The memory of wood splinters tearing through her skin was the first thing flashing through Mal's mind when Carlos offered her the stick used for the game he loved, and she hesitated for a moment before reaching forward to take the object from his grasp. She could see the look of recognition and sympathy slide through his eyes, but she averted her gaze, not wishing to discuss any of her past injuries with the boy, especially not the one that had led to so many larger issues.

"Okay, so the stick is used to guide the ball, mainly," Carlos began explaining, reaching behind himself to grab a yellow shield. "This is needed for the position I play."

"Do you hide, possibly?" Mal questioned, quirking her eyebrow as she slid her arm through the back of the shield.

Carlos laughed sarcastically. "Very amusing, but no," a small smiled curled his lips upward before he added. "That was only the first time I played."

"So you do hide from the rest of the players?" Mal went on jokingly, feeling more like herself with no one around to treat her as though she were a glass bomb ready to detonate at any given moment. It was refreshing, and slightly relieving. "Using this, I presume, to cower."

Eyes narrowing playfully, Carlos flattened his palm on the outside of the shield and shoved her own arm into her, knocking her back a step. Another laugh sounded from her, and she was startled by the sound of her own joy. The deep ache devouring her body hadn't lessened, but she was willing to push passed it in order to be with Carlos, which her heart hoped was progress.

However, that all seemed to shatter when a familiar figure came into view. The smile dropped from her face and her arms became dormant where they were, her feet carrying her backward a few steps until a warm hand slid comfortingly onto her arm. She met Carlos' eyes briefly, but quickly returned her gaze to the boy approaching them, and though he walked casually she still found her heart accelerating with fear.

"A little after-school learning?" Jay asked, stopping a few feet from them, clearly reading the stance Mal had taken and deciding to give her space.

"I'm teaching her my position in tourney," Carlos answered with an explanation, a smile curving his mouth.

Jay crossed his arms, and Mal feared what came next, however, instead of needing to adopt a defensive stance she found her heart leaping into her throat in shock when she saw his mouth quirk in amusement. She had no idea what was happening, and she didn't know what to expect, but she definitely hadn't been ready for what came out of Jay's mouth next.

"Come on, Carlos, don't teach her such a waste of information," Jay started, reaching forward to snatch the tourney stick from Carlos' grip. "Why don't I show you the important stuff?"

Mal's eyebrows rose in confusion, and she figured she must have looked utterly petrified because Jay soon switched his smirk out for a softer smile. She had to swallow a thick lump in her throat before she could even think about responding verbally, but she somehow managed to force a single word passed her lips.

"Important?"

"He means his position," Carlos announced from beside her.

"Yeah, the position that actually does something," Jay teased, reaching out and pulling the smaller boy into a head-lock before Carlos could even register his movement.

Mal cautiously watched the way the two interacted, her spine finally loosening as she witnessed the way Jay's eyes glinted with a friendly joy. A week ago she would have never allowed herself to feel so intimidated by someone, in fact, she would have scolded and tortured herself for possessing even the tiniest scrap of fear; but something had changed the night she had relived the most haunting pieces of her life. And due to that change she still felt the fear coursing through her even as she allowed the small smile that tugged relentlessly at her lips to win.

"Okay, first of all," Jay began, laughing as he shoved Carlos away from him and instead focused on Mal. "My job is to score points, Carlos' is to block opponents from getting in the way, which one sounds like more fun to you, Dragon?"

Her gaze immediately dropped to her left arm, finding the double-dragon tattoo staining her pale skin, completely exposed to the two boys since her jacket remained in the dorm. She released an internal sigh of relief, telling herself she had allowed herself to become worried for no reason; there's no way he knows what I am. And, as the initial worry faded, she found herself enjoying the nickname more than she would ever admit.

She brought her gaze back to the boy's dark-brown eyes, lifting her shoulders in a shrug.

"Right," Jay laughed lightly, nudging Carlos gently. "She's just trying to spare your feelings."

"Maybe she's trying to spare yours," Carlos retorted, using both his arms to shove the taller boy in return. "Anyway, she can easily learn both."

"Fair enough," Jay conceded, crossing his arms and nodding in agreement. "But we'll start with mine, since it's so much more useful than yours."

"Whatever," Carlos breathed out, shaking his head as his eyes met Mal's.

She could see the amusement in them and allowed herself to smile at the boy. Movement in her peripheral vision caught her attention, and she shifted her gaze to find Jay lightly tossing the tourney ball into the air repeatedly with the end of the stick.

"You ready to learn with the best of them?" Jay questioned, tossing the ball at her.

Reflexively, Mal shot her arm up to block, however, she realized what was happening just as quickly and moved her own tourney stick up swiftly, smoothly cradling the ball in the small dent at the end of it. She found both of them watching her in admiration.

"Nice reflexes," Jay praised with a wide smile gracing his features.

"Thanks," Mal said, her voice quieter than she had wanted it to be. She averted her gaze, realizing how small and weak she must seem. How small and weak you are. She shook her head to rid herself of the taunting voice, slinging the ball back at Jay. "Let's play."

Both Jay and Carlos smiled at her the way she assumed they would smile at anyone else about to play a game with them, and she felt something flickering deep inside her chest at the thought of them viewing her as an equal, as someone who wasn't in the midst of an internal breakdown. Without someone looking at her as though she were broken, she felt a weight shedding from her shoulders, and with the boys she quickly found a joy she hadn't felt in a long time.