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CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

Prelude to the End

~RIN~

I didn't have to look up to know who had entered my room.

I doubt Miku would have the heart to go in again after what had transpired a few moments ago between us. Nothing would be the same after all of this and I plan to accept that. It was my fault to begin with not hers. It was because of what I had done that Len had left Miku.

"It's not like you to be quiet lately, Rin." Rei finally said and my tired eyes looked up to see him standing in front of me. He looked tired and disheveled as if he hadn't slept in days. Was he really that worried at me? I gripped my sheets tightly and closed my eyes. I really am very cruel. I wish that it had been Rei who I had fallen in love with and not Len… that way it wouldn't so painful to all of us. That none of this was happening right now but it's not that way. It's easy to say you love someone but you know in you that your heart beats for someone else. It was like that with Rei. I love him, yes, but not the same love he had for me. That kind of love I have is for no one else but Len. That is why it's alright if he hates me so much.

"When you are almost near death's door… You think of a lot of things." I only mutter and I could see him grip his hands into tight fists as he looks into my eyes, his gold ones reflecting into mine but I quickly look away. Don't give me those eyes… I don't deserve them.

"Look at me." He orders but I stay firm and look down. I don't want to see it, the wounds reflected in those eyes were all because of me. All because I had given him the chance to love me when I could not love him back.

"Rin, look at me." He demanded and that was when I felt his warm hands cupping my face and turning me to look at him. I tried to pry free but his grip was tight and I felt tears well up into my eyes as I forced myself to stare back at his eyes. I gripped his arm tightly and forcefully pried them away from my face before I looked down to hide my face.

"Are you happy now? Did you find anything-," I almost cried out before I was muffled by Rei as he quickly embraced me tightly. I tried to push him away but he held me firmly. Please… I don't deserve anymore of this kindness of yours.

"I won't find it, Rin. Even if I looked into them, all I will ever see is my brother and not me. I know that but please understand that no matter what, this kindness is not forced and nor will I harbor any hatred against you even if you didn't choose me. I love you Rin so please understand that. It hurts me to see you like this that if I could switch places with you then I gladly would just to see you smile again. So please… just let me stay like this." He begged and through that muffled plea, I felt something wet trickle down my shoulders.

Was he… crying for me?

I gripped his shirt tightly and nothing could come out from my mouth but a sob as well. We're we both crying for our lost future, I wonder? Two people who couldn't find something in this world are crying for each other and yet unlike every fairytale I've read, they didn't fall in love. It was one-sided and something I would be holding in me until my dying breath but I didn't want to tell Rei that. No doubt he'd just worry more and I didn't want him to get hurt because of me.

"You tell me that you will never give up on me but I don't want that." I say as I pull him away to face him with more courage. Didn't I decide this upon myself to tell them both what I felt? Didn't want to fix these mistakes so that I wouldn't die with regrets?

"I want you to be happy too and I wouldn't want you crying on my grave forever. Promise me that when the time comes you'll let me meet that person, alright." I manage a smile but this time it's Rei who looks away and shakes his head as if the idea was so wrong for him.

"I don't want anyone else but you, Rin! At least understand my feelings." He complained and this time I frowned.

"Life is short and the same goes with feelings. Don't end up like me, Rei. I know you're strong enough to move on unlike me…"

"Stop it! Stop saying like you're going to die… Don't leave me alone." He could only cry and I felt tears rolling down my face at the thought of seeing how hurt he was. I don't want to leave them alone but I know my own death and it isn't far off. I want to think that this is all some sort of dream I'll soon wake up from but I know that that isn't the case. This is reality and I accepted it long ago. I want Rei to accept it as well but seeing him distraught, I didn't know how I was going to persuade him to just stop. You can't loving someone and I know that well enough that's why I can only hope time will fix him. Unlike me, he'll be able to find someone else soon.

"I-I… won't lie, Rei. I know I'm at my limit and I won't deny that to you. It may have been short but we all had fun. I only wish I could undo my mistake to both you and Miku but I know time is irreversible. I don't know any other way to atone for it so I'm sorry if this is all I could do. Consider it a last plea from the dying, Rei. Please… just let me go…" I gripped the sheets tightly, begging that he could, at the very least, accept this last wish of mine.

"No." He said with more finality and I was about to argue when he took me by surprise with a soft and chaste kiss, it was fast but it was enough to convey to me what he wanted to say.

"I'm sorry but I won't be able to… I won't be able to honor your wish so easily like that but I'll let time move it for me. So for now, until this all ends- just let me love you one last time." He apologizes as we both cried silently, time itself giving us this moment to let out feelings and emotions we never had the chance to convey.

I'm sorry and… farewell, Rei…

~REI~

Our time was short but it held more to me knowing that these following days will the most painful times of my life. I wanted to still stay longer and be by her side until she slept but the doctors sent me out to allow her to rest. I wanted to argue but Rin assured me that she would still see me tomorrow. I wanted her to say next time but I know she may not have next time, the least she could do was give me a more truthful answer but it was painful knowing that each day would be hell for me as her death draws near.

I exit the ward and I see Meiko resting by the guest area, her eyes still zoning in and out. Kaito sat next to her, trying to comfort her as she burst into another fit of tears. Even Piko looked out of it. Rin did leave an impression on them so to see her go so soon… it just didn't feel right. The moment Meiko saw me, she quickly excused herself and walked over to me, her eyes still trying to adjust to the sudden light.

"How is she?" She only asked me and I shook my head.

"She's…okay… for now." I tried to make more effort to tell her, knowing she wouldn't take it well considering the fact that Rin barely had a few months left to live. Meiko had that grim look on her face as she only nodded and sighed.

"I wish I had been more attentive. If I had known this then maybe they would have treated her much faster…"

"None of this is your fault, Meiko. I guess in Rin's view, she just didn't want anyone to worry about her. Even I feel useless right now but I know there is nothing I can do to rewind time. All I can do is to top wallowing in despair and try to make her happy until the end." I say, controlling the urge to make it anymore worse by crying in front of Meiko. I felt something pat me on the head and my eyes widen in surprise as I look up to see Meiko smiling at me.

"Thank you, Rei. I'll be sure to do that." She replies as she backs away and leaves me to my thoughts. Make her happy until the end… I know it's hard but it's the only things we can for her now.

"If that's the case then I have to talk to him…" I say to no one. Even if I hate him right now, fighting with him will only make Rin sad. At the very least, before she goes, can't he at least have a decent talk with her? Even if it hurts, I will bear it just to see that smile one more time.

"Welcome back, Master Rei." The butlers and maids greeted but I paid them no heed as I asked for my brother's location. Apparently, after he heard the news, my brother ran home and confined himself to his room. My frowned deepened as I marched to his room and barged the door open.

"R-Rei?" I saw my brother sit up from his bed, his eyes red and clothes disheveled as if he hadn't slept in a week. His room was a mess as well with pillows ripped open, bedposts broken and glass windows cracked. I quickly looked away from the carnage and turned back to my brother who only looked away from me.

"How is she?" He asked and I gave him the same answer I gave to Meiko. I could see him control the urge to punch something and it made me wonder how far he finally… fell for her. Did he finally realize it when he broke off the marriage with Miku?

"I'm sorry but if your purpose here is to force me to see her it seems I won't be able to do it." As if reading my thoughts, brother answered as he sat down and begin to sob, something I've rarely seen from the stoic and calm façade he always showed me back then.

"I knew that was going to be your answer but you should know as well that I won't be backing out this time." I merely say and I see him stop and glare at me.

"Don't you understand that I can't!? I'm the reason she ended up like that! I have no right to see her… all I ever did was hurt her and I don't deserve to be forgiven by her. I will carry this sin until I die." He growled and that was when I reached my point and grabbed by the collar and lifted him up. If it had been any normal day, he would have retaliated and hit me but I know the face of someone who has lost the will to fight and right now-

I'm looking at one.

But I wasn't here just to give up and leave him to wallow in this regret. Even if it's so tempting to do so, I know that Rin wouldn't be happy with that idea, I promised to love her till the end and make her happy but I know as well that I wouldn't act selfish and do it myself. After all, Len is the only one who can do that and not me.

"I hate you, did you know that? Ever since we were young, you always took the attention while the second son, which was me, stayed in the shadows. I resigned my fate to that but when I met Rin… she gave me a reason not to give up trying yet. Even if she couldn't love me back, the least I could is make her happy. You say that you've brought nothing but hurt to her but for Rin it was different. She loved you too much to see any fault in you and for that it made me jealous. I wish I was you instead, if it meant I could make her happy but I know that it's stupid to wish for something like that. So please brother… just one last time…" I pause as I put him down, tears streaming down my face as I tried to force out the words.

"I'm sorry but I won't be able to… I won't be able to honor your wish so easily like that but I'll let time move it for me. So for now, until this all ends- just let me love you one last time." I could still hear those words I said to Rin playing in my head. At the very least, even if it's not me, let her be happy…

"You must have realized it by now, right? That your feelings for Rin must be something else than a mere affection for a friend. Isn't that why you broke it off with Miku? Because somehow along the line, you've finally fallen for Rin. It's because of that that you ran away from the ward because you were afraid to face Rin and tell her. Even it was for her sake, you do realize that until she dies… she will never be able to know what you feel. Will you really take away that chance from her? At least give her your answer just to end this once and for all." I beg which was something I've never done to my brother. That's why he knew I was serious because his eyes widened for a second and then quickly looked away,

"I'm sorry, Rei." He only said as he moved away from me and ran out the room. Leaving me alone. I looked at the floor and noticed that the my vision was blurry as if I was underwater, I even had difficulty breathing as if taking in anymore oxygen was so painful it hurt my lungs.

"I-I… won't lie, Rei. I know I'm at my limit and I won't deny that to you. It may have been short but we all had fun. I only wish I could undo my mistake to both you and Miku but I know time is irreversible. I don't know any other way to atone for it so I'm sorry if this is all I could do. Consider it a last plea from the dying, Rei. Please… just let me go…" Rin's voice echoed in my mind as I collapsed to the ground, looking out to the balcony towards the setting sun.

Silence engulfed the room save for the sound of something finally cracking and falling apart.

I give up. I'm sorry I know that no matter how much I apologize it will never make up for how much of a terrible person I am for not updating for so long. I wanted to try to make a longer chapter but sadly if I did so, it'd only make the chapter more difficult to write. I felt like it needed to end here so sorry for such a short chapter.

Thank you so much for those who still supported this fic. I know I'm a terrible person for not updating but you guys never gave up on it and for that I am eternally grateful! Just one more chapter before the end and I hope you guys can sit in for this last story.

Fave and Review guys :)

-xXGemini14Xx-