This is the first of (hopefully) a couple of holiday themed conversations. We join Fran Morgan for this one.
"Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful." – Norman Vincent Peale
"Emily, that was lovely," I say as I move to get up and clear my plate after a wonderfully delicious and rather filling dinner. "Thank you."
"Oh, just leave that, Fran. Derek will get it," she says, fixing my son with a meaningful glare as she moves toward Tegan and Matthew who are loudly protesting to be let out of their high chairs. He shakes his head, but gets up and begins grabbing the plates, cutlery, and glasses. I suppress a chuckle when I realize that she's perfected the all-powerful wife/mother glare, and that Derek is not immune to it.
"Mama! Mama! Mama! Down!" the twins yell together, and I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from grinning. After raising three troublemakers – of whom Derek was definitely the worst – it's a little relieving to see his kids being just as rambunctious.
"No yelling," Emily says patiently, looking both kids in the eye to get her point across. "If you want something, you need to ask nicely."
Both Tegan and Matthew's brows furrow at her request and little frowns appear. "DOWN!" they shriek, clearly deciding to stick to their guns. Something tells me that is a foolish, foolish decision on their parts.
Emily's arms cross over her chest as she lets out a sigh. "No," she replies gently, and yet at the same time firmly, with a shake of her head. "You need to ask nicely, and I definitely don't want to hear yelling or screaming."
Tegan's lower lip begins to tremble and suddenly there is a stream of tears making their way down her cheeks. "Mama!" she cries loudly, holding her arms out toward Emily, and kicking her legs against the chair.
Matthew has remained a little more composed, but the frown is still on his face as he swings his gaze over to Derek. "Daddy!" he yells loudly.
"Sorry, buddy," Derek says with a shake of his head. "You heard Mama. You need to ask nicely. And quietly."
"Down pease?" Matthew responds, looking back at Emily with his arms outstretched toward her and a slightly guilty expression on his face.
"Thank you," she replies as she pulls him out of the chair and puts him on the ground. He immediately takes off for the room adjacent to the kitchen where his toys are strewn about on the floor.
"MAMA!" Tegan yells louder, nearing a scream level as she kicks violently and tries to push herself out of the chair.
"I'm not letting you out of there until you calm down and ask nicely," Emily says patiently. "Sorry," she apologizes when she glances over at me.
"Don't worry," I reply, waving off her apology. "From what I can see Tegan takes after her father quite a bit," I add with a chuckle.
"Would you mind keeping an eye on Matthew? I'm not sure how long this standoff is going to last…"
"If her stubbornness is anything like her mother's, we could be here awhile," Derek chimes in with a cheeky grin as he grabs some bowls and pots from the table.
"No problem," I answer with a genuine smile. It's never, after all, an imposition for me to play with my grandchildren.
She smiles gratefully before turning her attention back to the screaming toddler in front of her.
Derek joins us before Emily and Tegan do, which, given the loud yells still coming from the kitchen isn't surprising. He flops down on the floor beside me, on the other side of his son, and immediately jumps into helping him with the puzzle he's working on intently.
I'm struck immediately by how beautiful it is to see my son with his own child. I feel tears prick my eyes as a wave of nostalgia and emotion washes over me. It doesn't seem so long ago that it was Benny playing on the ground with Derek. I see so much of him in Derek – the goofy grin, the kind eyes, the penchant for evoking laughter, the endless patience to play every iteration of a game that could possibly be thought up by a child's mind…
Derek must feel my gaze on him, because he glances up and his brows furrow when he sees my expression. "You okay?"
"I'm good, I'm good," I say, waving off his concern. "I'm just enjoying seeing my baby boy playing with his own baby boy."
He smiles and holds my gaze for a moment before turning his attention back to Matthew when the toddler begins to get frustrated with a puzzle piece that doesn't seem to fit anywhere.
"Try turning it," he suggests gently, reaching around Matthew to show him what he means.
"Yeah!" Matthew shrieks happily when the piece finally fits. I feel my own grin widen at their shared happiness. My heart feels about ready to burst with joy.
It's another few minutes before Emily and Tegan join us, the latter's face stained with tear tracks. Emily takes a seat on the couch on the opposite side of the room, setting Tegan down in front of her as she gives her some instructions quietly.
Tegan nods her understanding and then moves quickly over to where Derek and Matthew are seated, pulling out a puzzle of her own to work on. I glance over at Emily and find her doing the same thing I am – watching Derek play with the kids. As she does, I see a serene kind of smile appear on her face and she relaxes back into the couch.
I know that look in her eyes – it's one I'd no doubt worn countless times before Benny died. It's the look that can only appear when you fall in love with your spouse all over again when you see them with your kids.
I get up and join her on the couch. "It's a beautiful sight, isn't it?"
She nods in agreement, not having to ask what I'm referring to. "Most of the time I can't believe I got this lucky," she admits. I scrutinize her carefully, noticing that her words aren't just a throwaway response. They are genuine. She actually can't believe that this life she and Derek are sharing is partly hers, and that she definitely has earned this happy ending.
"I felt the same way with Benny," I reply, giving her a warm smile when she meets my gaze. "I didn't think it was possible to love him any more than I already did, but seeing him with our kids…I fell in love with him all over again, and couldn't believe that he loved me of all people."
She smiles and nods in understanding. "He's a great dad," she says quietly after a few moments of silence.
"He learned from the best," I say with a fond smile.
Emily reaches over and gives my hand a squeeze, staying silent and letting me process the emotions that have come rushing to the surface with all the memories. Eventually, my mind wanders back to Emily and Derek. The two of them came together in such a roundabout way, and they aren't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but they just seem to fit so well.
The way that he looks at her is the same way that Benny used to look at me, and I recognize the way she looks at him as the way I used to look at him. Benny and I had shared a true love, and I know that Emily and Derek share that kind of love too.
They aren't perfect – after all I've heard stories of their fierce arguments, and have been witness to the terrible tension that can overwhelm them as a result of said arguments – but they work. They balance each other out – she is collected where he is heated, he is easy going where she is more tense – but they share so much in common, that their relationship is so strong.
"Daddy?" Tegan says as she looks up from her toys, breaking me from my reverie.
"Yes, little princess?" he answers with smile.
"See 'ights?"
"Yes, we're going to see the tree lighting," he answers easily, not thrown by the toddler-speak.
"Nana 'ome too?"
"Yes, Tegan. Nana is coming with us," he answers patiently.
"Mama 'ome?" she asks, glancing over at Emily.
"Yes, Mama is coming with us too."
"Daddy go?"
His brow furrows at her words this time, no doubt trying to decipher them. "Yes, Tegan, we're going soon," he says finally.
"Actually, we should start getting ready," Emily chimes in, "since it's going to take us ages to pack up everything."
"Life with kids," I say with an understanding nod.
"Mama! We 'ot 'ot 'hocolah," Tegan says happily as she runs toward us.
"Wow, you got hot chocolate? Where did you get that?" she answers with a smile as she takes the paper cup from Tegan's hands before it spills everywhere.
"Daddy 'ook us."
"Oh, he did, did he? And where is Daddy?" she asks when she's unable to spot him.
Tegan doesn't answer verbally, instead turning and pointing to Derek's figure that is rapidly approaching, Matthew in his arms.
"Mama!" Matthew cries loudly, turning and immediately reaching for his mother when he's close enough.
Emily frowns at her son's cries, asking Derek the silent question which he answers quickly. "He got a little excited and fell when he lost his footing. Face planted right onto the ground and starting yellin' for you."
"C'mere, Matty," she coos, handing Derek Tegan's hot chocolate and pulling the crying Matthew into her arms, where he immediately buries his face in her coat. "Shhh, it's okay."
"Daddy, we play?" Tegan asks, looking up at Derek with hopeful eyes.
"Don't you want to finish your hot chocolate first?" he suggests, swinging his gaze back over to Matthew and Emily for a moment, clearly concerned about his son.
She shakes her head quickly. "Play."
"Okay, little princess. Lead the way," he says, handing off the hot chocolate to me when I hold out my hand.
"Shhh, Matty. You're okay, little man, you're okay," Emily says softly as she rubs Matthew's back gently to soothe his cries. Slowly his tears subside and just soft whimpers are left. "Okay, let's take a look at the damage," she says as she shifts him to one side and reaches up to wipe the last remnants of his tears away.
"Owie," he says, pointing to his forehead.
"Yeah, I bet it hurts. You want me to kiss it better?" He nods quickly, and Emily leans in to press a gentle kiss to his forehead. "How's that?"
His only response is to bury his face back into her chest, and Emily just smiles. "Oh, look. Daddy and Tegan are playing a game over there. Do you want to go play with them?"
I see Matthew nod and then watch as Emily puts him down gently, giving him a little push when he appears to freeze. He walks forward slowly, and then breaks into a run when Derek notices him making his way over and opens up his arms excitedly.
"Ah, the healing powers of a mother's kiss," I say knowingly.
"I'm not looking forward to the day that it stops being effective," she quips.
"You'd be surprised how long it lasts," I reply, looking over at my son. "I think mothers always have some element of healing ability."
"Yeah?"
I nod my answer, but keep my gaze on Derek and my grandchildren. We both chuckle when we see the twins tackling Derek, who is lying on the ground with his arms outstretched. Classic goofball.
"They adore him, don't they?" I observe.
"Oh, that's putting it lightly," she answers with a chuckle.
"They seem to adore you too," I say, meeting her gaze.
She chuckles as she answers. "In certain moments, yes. Usually for kissing owies better, and getting ready for bed."
"Kids are funny that way. I remember Desiree and Sarah wouldn't let me bathe them when they were really young. They would shriek and scream for me, but as soon as Benny had them in his hands, they'd quiet down."
"Huh. And Derek?"
I grin. "He's always been a bit of a ladies' man."
She chuckles. "Oh, why does that not surprise me?"
Just as I'm about to reply, the announcer in the park introduces a few dignitaries who are on hand for the tree lighting, letting us know that the countdown will begin shortly. Derek arrives with the twins in tow and hands Tegan over to Emily.
"Daddy up!" Matty says excitedly, reaching up with his hands.
"You want up on my shoulders?" Derek confirms.
"Yeah!" Matty answers, bouncing on his little legs.
"You got it, little man. Up you go."
I smile as I remember Benny doing the exact same with Derek when he was young. I glance at Emily once more, and find Tegan nestled comfortably in her mother's arms.
"Nana?" Tegan says, looking over at me.
"Yes, Tegan?" I answer.
"See 'ights?"
"Yes, Tegan," I answer with a smile, "it's time to see the lights."
The countdown begins shortly after, and within seconds the park is illuminated by a gorgeous array of lights in the trees.
I look at both Tegan and Matthew, and find both sets of eyes wide with wonder. I smile at their awe-struck expressions and find myself thanking the universe for having Derek and Emily cross paths, and more importantly for having the two of them get together. Through Derek's relationship with Emily, I'd gained another daughter, and two grandchildren, all of whom I adore. My family had shrunk many years ago through tragedy, but it had grown in the past few years through genuine joy and happiness.
"Thank you," I say quietly as I lean over toward Emily.
She turns slightly and her brow furrows in confusion. "For what?"
"For them," I answer, nodding toward the twins, "for making him happy," I continue, nodding to Derek, "and for having me in your life."
She smiles and I swear I see a shimmer in her eyes. "Thank you for being in my life," she answers quietly.
I turn my attention back to the lights, and the fireworks which have now started. I feel my smile widen as I realize this is a wonderful start to the holiday season.
Hoping that brought a smile to your face... Do let me know what you thought.