Chapter 5: Missing Time

Meissa came to with a start, jerking awake with her eyes flying wildly around to take in her surroundings. It took her a moment to realize that she was in the dormitory, fully dressed with her shoes still on.

Confused by why she's in bed and at a lost as to what's going on, she sits up. The world started to swim at the motion, forcing her to hold a hand to her forehead as if it could ward off a headache. What had happened to her?

Wincing as the dull lights causes her headache to worsen she pats around her for her wand when she discovers that it's not stashed away in its' holster. She searched along the bedcover before she gives up trying to find it by hand.

"Accio wand," she murmurs quietly and was surprised when her wand flied to her from underneath the dresser by her bed. Wondering why her wand would be underneath there she grips the handle. (1)

"Tempus revelare," she mutters and she was surprised to find that it was still early. It wasn't late enough for supper but it was late enough that classes for the day was done. But she couldn't remember the trip back from the East Wing. (2)

"What happened," she whispers to herself before she stood up, stumbling slightly before she managed to find her footing and left the room.

A short trip up to the Common Room revealed that it was a mess - there were scorch marks here and there from spell impacts and there were signs of a fight. Looking around she couldn't see why it looked like there was a fight. Or why no effort to clean it up had been made.

She takes a look about but when she doesn't see Draco - or any of his cronies - she wonders where he would have gone. She wanted to ask about where he had gone but anyone she made eye contacts with were quick to duck their heads or look away.

Confused as to what's going on she leaves the common room. When she looks around she saw nothing unusual other than the usual gloom of the dungeons so she picks a random direction and started walking. If the Slytherins were going to stare at her strangely until she met their eyes then she'd rather walk the dungeons or even the whole of Hogwarts instead of being the object of their whispers.

"What would you do, mum," she mutters quietly to herself as she walked. She knew the reputation of her family. Some say that her family is full of wackos - her mother, Bellatrix, was renowned for her skills in the Wizarding war and for her insanity on the field.

Her great-grandfather once told her that every member of the Black family had a touch of insanity running through their veins. That it was a price to be paid for their affiliation for Dark magic. She didn't know for sure herself since she hadn't made an effort to learn any of the family's dark spells. But she knew that there were plenty of spells in the Black library, in the books.

She didn't know if she wanted to learn the Dark magic her family was known for. It wasn't something her grandfather had demanded she learn but then again he hadn't been involved in her life all that much.

Encouraged to find her own path maybe but he hadn't been interested in raising her in the Black traditions.

She didn't know why he was so interested in her breaking the traditions - she half expected someone to blast her off the tapestry but after Grandpa Pollux passed away she came to realize that there weren't many members left with the Black name.

If there was any left they were probably married into another family which meant that their descendants would never have the family name and they would never be taught to take pride in their name and their ancestry as a Black.

"Meissa," she hears someone call her attention and she looks towards the source to find that it was Hermione. Judging from the books in her hand she was just coming back from the library. "What are you doing on the seventh floor?"

Meissa looks around for the first time since she started walking, surprised that she had managed to walk this far without running into trouble. "Um… I haven't the slightest idea."

"Are you ok?"

She thinks this one over. She still has no idea how her classes ended. She barely remembered what was covered in Transfiguration and that was the last class of the day.

"I think so," she finally answers, running a hand through her hair to take it out of her face. She looks at Hermione and sees that she's struggling to hold her books. "Here, let me help you with that before you drop one of them." She takes half of the books in her grasp without waiting for a confirmation and didn't get a complaint. They both knew what would happen if a book was to even get the tiniest bit scuffed.

"Thank you," Hermione smiles brilliantly at her. "So, back on the topic of you being on the seventh floor."

Meissa rolls her eyes. "I already said I don't know why I'm up here."

"Well is something bothering you?"

"Um… Did you see me do anything odd during Transfiguration?"

"Odd how?"

"Anything," Meissa mutters as she averts her eyes.

"Meissa, what's going on?"

"I don't… I don't remember much about what happened before the last bell."

Hermione looked sharply at the Black heiress at what she just said, "Nothing at all?"

"Um…"

The raven-haired girl frowns as she bites on her knuckle, thinking.

There was a spell…

"Didn't we practice transfiguring a match into a needle?" She sees Hermione nod her head.

"Do you remember how that went?"

"... You did excellent, you always do… I got it right on my second try… that Finnigan boy set something on fire…"

"So you do remember some things."

Meissa rubs her temple, the attempt made her head hurt. "That hurt a lot more than it should have," she remarks drily.

Hermione shifts her books so that she could hold them under one arm and presses a hand against Meissa's forehead. "No signs of a fever," she comments. "Do you think you're coming down with something?"

"I doubt it," Meissa mutters quietly, "I don't really get sick often."

"I find that hard to believe," Hermione remarks.

Meissa shrugs her shoulders, "It's the Black genes. Strong immunity but you die young every time."

Hermione stares at her wide eyed at that.

"Don't talk like that!"

"What, I only meant the truth."

Hermione smacks her shoulder. "It's still horrid! Why would you say something like that?"

Meissa grumbles as she rubs her shoulder. "It's the truth. No one in the family has ever reached their one hundredth birthday."

"You could be the one that makes that difference!"

Meissa gives her a look that told her how much she didn't believe that.

"Look, I didn't mean to say it to make you worry, Hermione. It's just how the family worked. This is how it's been since before the 1800s."

"You are a very blunt person, you know that?"

Meissa smiles almost deviously at the Gryffindor before she drops it, her thoughts straying from the conversation. She could remember a time when she spoke softly and respectable to all. Before her walls went up and she went cold inside.

"Meissa?"

"Mm?"

"Supper is going to start soon, can you help me carry the books?"

Meissa looks at her strangely, realizing just what the bushy haired girl was saying. "You do realize that I never been to the Gryffindor Tower before right?" Meissa asks drily as she motions for the girl to start walking.

"I don't see you using the knowledge you've seen to get inside Gryffindor Tower."

The raven-haired girl stays quiet s she follows Hermione. "I don't know what to say."

Hermione rolls her eyes at the Slytherin and just led the way to the Fat Lady painting who eyed Meissa suspiciously.

"What are you doing here," the proud and arrogant looking woman demands. Meissa had no doubt that it was directed at her. Her house colors were proudly displayed on her uniform after all.

"She was helping me carry my books."

"She's an enemy of your House."

"I trust her."

Meissa was quiet - she wanted to discourage Hermione from being so trusting with her but at the same time she felt… glad that Hermione feels that way around her.

"She isn't entering. And you are not either until you get rid of her."

"You're being ridiculous!"

"Hermione," Meissa interrupts before things could get rolling. "It's okay," she murmurs to the girl, "You don't need me here and I don't need to enter the Gryffindor Tower."She smiles at the surprised look on her face as she hands her the books. "I'll see you around."

~MJB~

Meissa presses her forehead against the post of her bed, her eyes squeezed tight to try and block out the light. She had a headache - it felt more like someone had pressed the tip of their wand against her temple and was boiling the inside of her head.

It was after supper and she was trying in vain to remember what had happened between Transfiguration and her wake up. The longer she tried to remember the worse the pain in her head became until she just had to give in. In defeat she searches her trunk for a vial of her migraine potions, producing plenty of empty vials before coming up with one precious migraine potion. Possibly her last until she gets a new batch from her godfather.

She gulps it down quickly, her hand grabbing the pillow and pressed it against her face. She wanted to block out the low light and muffle everything. She was actually tempted to reach for her wand and cast a silencing charm around her bed or at least reinforce the one she had placed in the beginning of the term.

"Meissa?" she hears someone call. She groans, disappointed that the silence she had been looking for was gone. "Meissa, are you okay? I heard about what happened, why did you attack Pansy?

Meissa takes a deep breath but sat up when something clicked in her mind.

"I attacked Pansy?" there was clear confusion in her voice.

"You don't remember that?" Daphne asks, crossing the room and sitting on the edge of Meissa's bed.

Meissa press a hand to her lips, her eyes darting back and forth as she tried to figure this out in her mind. She knew that there was a gap in her memories but she didn't expect it to be something that major.

Wait, does that mean… the common room…?

"I need to talk to Professor Snape," she mutters quietly, thinking.

"You have detention with him tomorrow, all day."

"What?!"

"He's the one who put a stop to it." There was a look in her eyes, a look she didn't like.

"You said I attacked Pansy," she mutters quietly, "What happened?"

"What do you remember?"

"Nothing at all."

"Nothing?"

"Last thing I remember is Transfiguration."

"Nothing else?"

"…" Meissa frowns and press a hand to her temple as she thought this over. She was… what was she doing… "We went somewhere…"

"Do you remember where?" Meissa mutters to herself before she mutters that they had gone outside. "That's right."

Meissa mutters quietly before she looks away, studying the stone wall opposite of the door.

"We were… sitting somewhere… Just you and me, talking and practicing a charm…"

"Right."

She starts to bite on her thumb, her eyebrows furrowed as she starts to remember. "… Pansy," she whispers, "I left to get us drinks…" Daphne nods her head to try and encourage her to remember even more. "I… I was coming back when I heard her say something. She was talking to you."

"That's right."

Meissa winces, her head starting to pound despite having recently taken a vial. "My head, it hurts…"

"Have you gone to see Madam Pomfrey?"

"No."

"She's a medic-witch, she could probably identify the problem," Daphne reasons.

"It's not important," Meissa dismisses as she rubs her temples.

"Meissa, this could be bad for your health, why don't you want to know?"

She stays quiet, not really committing an answer. She didn't know how to explain or even answer. And there was a large part of her that didn't want to. She pulls her legs up to her chest and wraps her arms around her knees - pressing her face against her knees to try and block out everything.

"Hey…" A hand touches her shoulder, "What's wrong?"

"It's… its too bright… it hurts."

"Let me try something." She turns her head slightly to watch Daphne pull her wand out. "Um… how did it go again?" Daphne whispers, "Ah. Now I remember. Exstingue." (3)

A gesture later the room was dark and she could breathe easily. She presses a hand to her forehead, relieved that the lights were off.

"Thank you," she mutters, brushing her hand against Daphne's shoulder. She rearranges her legs and starts to fiddle with the hem of her shirt.

"This doesn't seem normal, Meissa," Daphne whispers before a hand presses against Meissa's forehead.

Startled at first Meissa made to move away before she realizes that the hand could only belong to Daphne.

"It's normal for me," Meissa tells the concerned blonde.

"Maybe you should try to get some sleep?"

"Not until you tell me why I attacked Pansy." She knew that not knowing what led to her detention would eventually drive her nuts. She wanted to find out now instead of later.

"…She was talking big, about having the favor of the Malfoy family. And that she knows that I'm the reason for what happened the other day."

"What?"

"The pranks."

"Oh…" Meissa frowns and she starts to hear bits and pieces of what happened.

As she remembers she bites down hard on her knuckle, nearly causing it to bleed in her agitation.

"She did something to you…" she mutters, switching to a different knuckle to bite on it instead.

"She didn't cast it right."

There was a flash of a memory and she ended up shaking her head in disbelief. "How the bloody hell does someone miscast a severing charm?"

"I'm glad that she did," the blonde mutters.

"I can't remember what happened after that."

"You made sure I was okay before going after her."

Meissa whines as she rubs her face, she couldn't remember any of this. She could just barely remember talking to Daphne and then… nothing. She remembered nothing between talking to Daphne and trying to get rid of her headache.

"Where did I attack Pansy?"

"In the Common Room."

That didn't make sense.

"I followed her from the middle courtyard to the common room and attacked her in front of witnesses?"

"Yes."

It seemed too much - how could she have been so stupid, so idiotic to attack someone with witnesses.

"Was any one hurt?" she asks quietly, her fingers untangling her thick curls. Working out the knots in her hair, braiding and re-braiding small strands repeatedly.

"No, at least, not from what I was told."

Meissa frowns worriedly at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well… they said that you used the blasting curse repeatedly, destroyed about half of the common room and you were about to use Expulso when someone knocked you over." Meissa rubs her forehead where she had felt a bump before. At least until she healed it. (4)

"None of this makes sense," she mutters quietly.

"Why?"

"… My great-grandfather, when I was younger, told me that if someone must be dealt with - never do it where one may witness it."

"He sounds like a great guy."

A soft chuckle escapes Meissa. She could remember some of her childhood with him. He wasn't a great grandfather but he had been there for her when she needed him.

"Grandpa Polly was a strict old bugger," she mutters quietly, "but he was a good man. He always told me that our family pride itself on being pure of blood. Toujours Pur."

Meissa reaches out and brushes her hand against Daphne's shoulder. The action keeping her grounded despite the chaos in her mind.

"Always Pure. That's the family's motto…"

"But your grandfather, Polly…?"

"Pollux Black."

"Ah. So, your grandfather, he taught you to…?"

"Toujours Pur. He told me that I needed to find my own meaning."

"I thought the Black family caries a lot about-."

"We do," Meissa interrupts. "Or rather, they do. But grandfather Pollux, he said that it doesn't have to mean 'pure of blood'."

"This is confusing. A Black saying it doesn't have to be about pure blood?"

Meissa chuckles softly. "Yeah, I know. It seems impossible right?"

"That's one way to put it." Daphne shakes her head in disbelief, the motion felt by Meissa who still had a hand on Daphne's shoulder. "So, your grandfather also taught you to never leave witnesses?"

"Yeah. He always said that a Black business should stay with the Black family. No need for outsiders to get involved," Meissa mumbles.

"It been ingrained in me for so long I can't even begin to think of why I would break that rule."

"When you put it that way, it doesn't make sense," Daphne mutters quietly in agreement.

"So… what happened to you?"

"I wished I knew, Daphne," Meissa pulls away, shifting so that she was close to the head of the bed. "The second I find out though…. Well, you'll probably know before I even figure it out."

"Why are you so sure about that?"

"Because it's likely true," Meissa retorts, her thoughts a bit distant as she thought about her family.

"Hey, you should probably get some sleep," Daphne mutters, pressing a hand to Meissa's forehead. "Especially if you still have a headache."

"Mm… you're right," Meissa mutter, tired now that it was mentioned.

Wordlessly she starts pulling at her school uniform, her movements clumsy until Daphne reached over and helped her. No words were exchanged between the two as the robes, tie, and socks were removed. The shirt and trousers were discarded last and only by Meissa as Daphne had left her side to get her a glass of water. Though red hue in her cheeks hadn't gone unnoticed when Daphne made the excuse to leave.

Meissa barely bothered with a pair of shorts and a thin cotton shirt, choosing to just lie down with all but one side of the curtains drawn. Just barely asleep by the time Daphne returned with a glass.

"Good night," the Black Heiress whispers as Daphne sets down the glass.

"Night… Hey, Meissa?"

"Mm…?"

"We'll find out what's wrong with you. Together, okay?"

Meissa barely registered the blonde's words. The migraine potion and her low energy - her energy sapped from the long day - made her drowsy and nearly unresponsive. But she wasn't so far gone that she didn't or couldn't answer the other girl.

"Together…"

Daphne smirks at the soft snores that left Meissa's mouth afterwards and after watching all the tension and worries fade away from the pale face she draws the last curtain shut. She could only hope that Meissa's trouble wouldn't return in the morning.

~MJB~

She couldn't breathe.

Oh god, why.

She looks wildly around her, a low pitch whine escaping her throat as she ran. Her terror was thick in her throat, her heart pounding hard in her chest. She couldn't breathe and the more she tried to the worse the feeling was.

She looks wildly around, her hands grouping for something she couldn't find. The thick fear in her chest worsens and a heavy pant fills her ears.

"Meissa~" she hears someone singsong her name and her heart practically jumps to her throat.

She looks around but could see nothing in the gloom of where she was. But she felt like she was suffocating, like she was trapped in a tiny room.

"Meissa~!" She whines and press her hands her ears to try and block out the voice. "Time to play~!"

"No!" She slumps down and presses her face against her knees, her hands tightly pressed against her ears. Her breathing uneven and raggedly as she struggled to block out the noise.

"My sweet Meissa~ Come and play with me. I promise you'll like my new game~"

"No. No. No. No. No. No."

"Meissa!"

She gasps as she threw her arm out, feeling a hand wrap around her wrist tightly. Panic flares deep inside her and she nearly screams out in horror. But before the scream could escape her throat a hand clasp down tightly on her mouth.

"Shh, Meissa, it's me!" She still struggled under the person's grasp until she hears them whisper 'Lumos'. The tip of a wand lights up and for the first time since she woken up she sees who it is. (5)

Daphne towered over her, her face worried and there was a red blemish on the right side of her face.

"Shh… you're safe, you're okay."

Meissa shudders, her breathing was still uneven. And it took Daphne a minute to realize that it was actually getting worse, causing her to remove her hands from the girl.

Meissa, once she was free, was quick to scoot away from the blonde - her legs drawn and her hands wrapped tightly around them.

"You're okay," Daphne whispers softly as she keeps her distance from the distraught girl.

"No," the girl whispers quietly, "No… no one is ever okay."

Daphne stares hopelessly at the raven-haired girl.

Translations:

1) Accio - summoning charm

2) Tempus revelare - time reveal

3) Exstingue - extinguish

4) Expulso - used to produce immense explosions, blasting the target apart

5) Lumos - Wand-Light spell