Day 40, Winter, sunny early morning.

"What are you doing Lexa ?"

The brunette was starting to wonder if Clarke was really trying to watch her every move like she would do for a child.

"Training. I spent almost a month in a bed, my muscles are weak and I cannot move my body like I want. So I am training" She answered never stopping her movements.

"But your ribs aren't healed yet and your arms are still weak. And the wound on your back can still reopen" the blonde said with a half accusatory, half worried tone.

Lexa sighed and interrupted her stance training and stretching. She walked closer to the blonde and answered calmly, slowly "Clarke it is not in my nature to stay still. I spent my whole life moving. I just cannot stop. I do not want to worry you. But I HAVE to do this"

Clarke's response sounded like a plea "No you don't. Not so soon"

Lexa stepped closer and the girl in front of her averted her eyes "Yes I do. For a month I did not have the full control of my own body. I want this back. I was forced to throw my pride away. I want it back"

Focusing her gaze on the ground behind Lexa, Clarke took a step back "I know. I know that. And I understand. I just don't want you to hurt yourself"

Lexa released a short laugh and the blonde looked back at her "I am not a child, nor an old woman or any other fragile animal you can think about Clarke. You worry too much. You always do. Even two years ago"

Clarke huffed "Fine, but if you get hurt, don't call me. I won't come and save your ass"

Lexa offered her a smile and resumed her training. From the corner of her eye, she saw Clarke sit down, watching her "You should go back to sleep"

"Only if you come with me"

Lexa fought the urge to roll her eyes "Then you will stay awake"

"Then I will stay awake" Clarke repeated as a statement, subtext being 'Because of you'. But Lexa's determination was stronger than the blonde's little game.

After what felt like ten minutes, Lexa heard a sneeze, rolled her eyes and gave up. For now.

Day 45, winter, snowy afternoon

Lexa was freeing the horses' field from the snow with Lincoln when the man spoke *How do you feel ?*

Lexa answered honestly *Free*

*It reminds me of our childhood. At your parent's farm*

Lexa recognized Lincoln's light tone and decided she could afford this conversation, now that her duty was gone *Yes. They were raising sheep though and our clothes were made of wool*

The big man released an amused huff *The clothes your mother was knitting were warmer than those in leather we are currently wearing, but they were itching*

The girl laughed openly *That is true. Remember that time you scratched your arm so much my dad had to rub your whole torso and arms with an appeasing oil ?*

*Yes. And I still have a mark. Here* Lincoln turned to Lexa, uncovering his wrist, showing a small, old white scar.

Lexa's eyes opened wide and she laughed *Spirits, that is true !* A comfortable silence fell. After a few minutes, words escaped the girl's lips, almost uncontrollably *I still miss them*

Lincoln stopped moving his shovel *Me too. Your mother was a saint and your father was a strong man. I will never forget what they did for me* he resumed his action *They left this world too soon*

Lexa nodded and silence fell again. Nostalgic. Lincoln had lost his parents at the age of nine. Lexa's father was friend with the Lincoln's so the brunette's family took him in. Two years later, Lexa's village was being burnt to ashes by a group of bandits. They wanted Lexa. Her father fought of course. And died. They killed her mother and raped her body in front of the two eleven year old children. A bunch of warriors that were passing by had killed the bandits before they could touch the kids but the village had burnt and all the villagers were dead. Lexa could still remember Anya's voice when the young woman had asked them if they wanted to come to the capitol with her. Of course they had agreed. Then started their training as warriors, Lexa being Anya's second and Lincoln, Indra's. Five years later, Lexa had become Heda.

The girl knew Lincoln since forever and she considered him as a member of her family. That is why she could sense something was wrong *I can see a sorrow in your eyes I do not recognize my friend. Why ?* she finally asked.

Lincoln took a deep breath *Octavia and I had a hard year. When we left the skaikru camp a few months after Clarke, I had hoped that an old friend of mine could help us. But you had banished me. We couldn't go anywhere. Then Octavia got pregnant. I was as surprised as her* At that Lexa just nodded, with what Clarke had told her, she could perfectly understand her friend's surprise *Then things happened and we finally arrived here. Clarke saved Octavia. She saved me. She saved you. She doesn't realise how important that is*

*She still blames herself* The blonde might have changed but Lexa knew war couldn't leave. It never disappeared. *Your daughter is beautiful*

The big man finally smiled *Yes. I'm proud. It wasn't easy at first but thanks to Clarke, Octavia is healing*

Now that Lexa thought about it, she had seen Clarke and Lincoln play with Selina a lot. But the only moments the mother was spending with her daughter were for meals and an hour a day during which everyone was leaving the two alone together. She had already questioned Clarke about that but she hadn't want to say anything *Will you tell me what happened ?* she asked, raising her head from her work to look at him.

*No* He shook his head *It is not my place to do so* he thought *But it could be a good thing for her to talk to you actually*

*Do not force her. She hates me*

*She doesn't. She's just… haunted. You might be good for her. I'll send her to you one day*

Lexa nodded and her shovel hit the snow again. After a long silence, something unexpected happened. Lexa felt a cold, wet thing hit her hard on the back of her head. She turned to Lincoln, her grin growing slowly. She raised a defying eyebrow *Do you really want to play at that my friend ? You think you can beat me ?*

Lincoln smirked, another snowball in his hand *Time passed. I'm taller and stronger now*

Lexa straightened her back and puffed her chest, full of insurance *But I am quicker* she waited a few seconds and added with a smirk *And smarter*. He threw his ball at her and she dodged.

Half an hour later, they went home drenched and refrigerated.

Of course Clarke and Octavia were mad.

Day 52, winter, stormy afternoon

The weather outside was so bad, they couldn't go out. Clarke wasn't showing it but Lexa knew she was worried. Octavia and Lincoln weren't coming back from their hunt.

The blonde was in her rocking chair with Selina on her lap, playing with her. It was crazy how much the little girl looked like Octavia even if her smile was Lincoln's. Lexa, sitting in her bed, was watching the scene in front of her in pure delight. The blonde seemed so happy, so light. She looked so good with a kid on her lap… She already had the behaviour of a mother in her daily life so of course figuring her with actual children wasn't that hard, but with Selina in her arms it looked like art for Lexa. It was like Clarke had been made for that, was in her place. Until she realised that if Clarke had children one day, she would need a man. The brunette tried really hard to chase away the disgusting images that filled her mind at the idea of Clarke doing… things with a man.

"You want to hold her, Lexa ?"

Clarke's demand brutally dragged Lexa out of her thoughts. She shook her head.

"Why ?"

"Octavia would not appreciate"

Lexa, for a moment, thought that Clarke would argue, but surprisingly, she dropped it. The small girl yawned and the blonde leaned her against her chest, rocking the chair slightly. After a minute she started humming that same lullaby again and Lexa asked "What is this ?" Clarke cocked her head to the side and Lexa added "The song"

"Oh. It's a song from the old world. My mom used to sing it for me sometimes"

"What is it called ?"

"The palm of a tiny hand"

Lexa wasn't surprised the song had been made for children. It was so sweet and calm "Are there Lyrics ?"

Clarke shrugged "Yes. But I forgot"

"Could you hum it again ?"

"Sure"

Clarke started humming and Lexa closed her eyes. She loved the girl's voice. Low, a little husky and so, SO soothing. She could sit and listen to this all day. That's probably why those words slipped from her mouth and surprised even herself *I love your voice*

Clarke shut up and Lexa opened her eyes, surprised by the sudden silence. The blonde quickly averted her eyes and said embarrassed "That's because you never heard my mom sing. She's better at it than I am"

Lexa smiled *Still. It does not change the fact that I love it* Clarke stiffly adjusted her position and Selina's, asleep in her lap. The brunette asked *Again ? Please ?*

The blonde cleared her voice and hummed.

Clarke's cheeks seemed redder than usual. Maybe it was the fire's fault.

Day 60, afternoon.

Lexa was fishing. She was on the river's bank, waiting for a fish to gently bite her hook so that she could finally go home. She had seven already. This one was supposed to be the last. After ten, cold, long minutes, Lexa finally caught a fish. Proud and happy, she opened her basket to put her freshly fished fish in it. But then her eyes widened. She closed them shaking her head before giving the basket a second surprised look.

Six fishes. They were six. They were supposed to be seven but they were six.

Lexa frowned. She had known how to count to ten for more than twenty year, so why ? She shrugged finally. The blonde had been agitated a lot at night these times and Lexa hadn't had a real, full, good night sleep in a week or so. She was tired that's all. She growled though. She still had a fish to catch.

She resumed her previous activity and this time she caught a fish after five minutes. Content, she returned to her basket opened it and…

Six. They were six. AGAIN.

She couldn't believe it. This time for sure it wasn't a count mistake. She wasn't THAT tired.

Suspicious, she started fishing again. This time a fish bit the hook almost immediately and Lexa smiled. Smile that disappeared immediately when her eyes fell on her basket. And... A raccoon. The animal had both of its hands in the basket. Time froze. Lexa was looking incredulously into the beast's eyes. Then the thing slowly, really slowly, took its hands out of the basket, taking a fish out of it at the same time, never turning its gaze from Lexa. The girl, understanding everything, gave the animal her best 'don't you dare !' look. But suddenly the raccoon hugged the fish tightly in its arms and ran away on its legs. Lexa following it, it took the fish in its mouth and climbed in a tree. Lexa, swearing, and promising to turn the poor thing into new gloves, climbed in the tree behind it. Unfortunately, the branch Lexa grabbed broke and she fell on the ground. The animal stared at her from above.

Lexa was preparing to climb again when she heard Clarke call her name.

She glared at the somewhat mocking thing in the tree one last time, saying *May we never meet again or I will have your fur on my bed and your meat drying in my cave before you have time to realise what happened to you !*

Two days later, Lexa was over with her duties (cleaning a house was not so complicated, why did people always guessed she wouldn't be able to do it ?) so she thought it could be fun to surprise the blonde, fishing at the river.

Clarke was supposed to be the one surprised but Lexa was the one aback. In front of her, a few feet away, was Clarke, sitting on the stony bank. Clarke, sitting on the stony bank and giving fish to a raccoon.

*The thief ! Step back Clarke, I will kill it !* she hissed, full of anger.

"No you can't." Clarke stood and the intelligent animal hid behind her.

Lexa stepped into Clarke's personal space, their faces inches from one another *Yes. I can.* She over articulated, her fists clenching and jaw tensing.

Clarke straightened her back and spoke calmly but firmly "But you won't."

"This !" she pointed to the living gloves behind Clarke "It-"

"She."

The brunette frowned in incomprehension "She ?"

"IT is a SHE"

Lexa shook her head. Clarke had just CUT HER to correct a pronoun mistake ? Wait it wasn't even a mistake ! Unbelievable. "Clarke, it- SHE stole my food !" she yelled.

"But she's PREGNANT !" Clarke yelled back and Lexa couldn't believe it.

*How do you even know that !?"

"Because she's my friend !"

"She's your f- … your friend ?" Now Lexa was more intrigued than angry and was starting to question the blonde's sanity.

Clarke sighed and went to sit next to her 'friend' again "Yes my friend. I found her last year around here. Her leg was broken so I healed her and sometimes I give her food and she lets me pet her" The beast jumped on the now smiling blonde's shoulder and licked her ear. Lexa was trying to push her jealousy away when she heard Clarke add in a laugh "No please, Commander, not there !"

Lexa's eyes opened wide "But Clarke I didn't-"

"Not you" the blonde laughed again "The raccoon."

Confusion replaced jealousy for a moment "But you said-"

"Commander, Yes. That's her name."

Lexa couldn't believe it. Why did Clarke, CLARKE, called a vulgar raccoon Commander !? "Why would you call it that ?" She asked as politely as she could.

Clarke sighed. "Come on. Sit." she patted a spot on the ground next to her. Lexa did as said and the beast took some distance. Good.

"I called her like that thinking about you"

Now Lexa was truly offended "How ? Why ? This thing is a thief ! I have never stole a thing in my entire life Clarke !"

"Will you please calm down !?" The blonde yelled and Lexa instinctively bowed her head a little. Clarke sighed again but then smiled "She's nice when you know her. You should give her a chance" Lexa cursed between greeted teeth "Lexa…" the blonde said in a menacing tone.

*Fine.*

"Good" Clarke nodded, extended a hand to the 'Commander' and smiled when it licked her fingers.

"But I still do not know why you called it-"

"Her"

Lexa rolled her eyes "Why you called HER, Commander"

Clarke smirked. "Really ? Seriously ?" Lexa nodded. "Ok don't move and close your eyes". The brunette crossed her legs and did as said, confused and still a little upset. A minute later she felt a cold sticky thing being spread on her closed eyes and cheekbones. When she opened her eyes again, Clarke had squat in front of her "So ? See why now ?"

Lexa frowned then it hit her. At the realisation, her frown disappeared to be replaced by a small smile and a glance at the beast "Yes."

A mischievous grin spread on the blonde's face and she bit her lip. "Stay like that for a minute" She took a small fish in her hand and pointed the ground next to Lexa "Commander, come here girl !" she said in a soft, happy voice and Lexa had never been so confused in her entire life. Clarke was saying her title without talking about her. Weird. Slowly, carefully, the raccoon did as said and sat a few feet away from Lexa. "Good girl" Clarke gave her treat to Commander "Now don't move." Once again the animal obeyed and Clarke took a few steps back. Lexa raised an eyebrow and the blonde burst out laughing, lying on the ground, her arms around her sides. Between two giggles she managed to say "I… I can't… That's… That's way TOO accurate !" and she laughed again. At some point she calmed down but when Commander and Lexa looked at each other at the same time she started laughing and giggling again.

Lexa was confused. She didn't see what in the current situation could amuse the blonde so much but she didn't really care. Clarke was laughing (like a mentally ill person but still) and she liked that. She smiled genuinely at the giggling thing in front of her but turned her head on the side when she felt something tugging at her sleeve. Commander licked its nose then tugged at Lexa's top with its little hand again.

Lexa raised an amused eyebrow.

Years later she eventually admitted that she thought the beast was kind of cute and that she had spent hours playing with her in Clarke's back.