Disclaimer: Own nothing
Anakin Skywalker
Tell him Obi-wan has a new apprentice
If he asks who tell him one of the clones shows more potential than him
Tell him the Jedi Council added a new rule to the Jedi Code Banning Jedi from wearing Black or leather and as a result he has to throw out all his clothes
Tell him he needs to watch the Yunglings while Yoda is on vacation
Give him a pink lightSaber
Tell the counsel that Anakin is in a relationship with a member of the Senate
Tell him That his wife is pregnant with Obi-wan's Baby
When he gets mad tell him to take anger management classes
Tape him braking the rules then Blackmail him with it
Introduce him to his daughter's boyfriend
Anakin Slices through the dour with lightsaber
Run !