Rayna pulled up to Deacon's East Nashville bungalow. It had once been "their"'s back when they were together. Rayna had been surprised that Deacon hadn't sold it and started over somewhere fresh. But then again, she wasn't really that surprised. Those four walls had seen their some of their worst moments, but also their most tender and brightest. It'd seen hit songs written in between passionate makeup sessions and every space of it was engraved with their love. Rayna had walked away from Deacon by starting a life with Teddy. And although Deacon's alcoholism had kept him from being what she needed, he'd never meant to walk away from her, he'd never left her and he'd never left their home.
All these thoughts were swirling around Rayna's mind as she walked up to the door. She knocked lightly twice before Deacon opened the door wearing his usual jeans and flannel. He smiled at her, in a way that made her feel safe for a moment, like maybe, just maybe everything could be alright.
"Come in, Ray."
"So, what's going on, Rayna? Bucky halted on work on the album, all your public appearances are cancelled. Are you okay?"
"No, Deacon, I'm not. We…uh….found that Maddie…, she has cancer, Deacon."
"Oh my god, Rayna. I'm…I'm so sorry. I mean is it….is it bad?"
"The doctors think we got it in time, and they think she has a good shot if she can get a bone marrow transplant from a matched donor."
"How are you holding up?"
"I'm trying. I know I need to be strong for her. I don't want her to be scared so I don't want her to see even a fraction of how scared I really am. So, I'm trying."
"I know things between you and me are different now, but I'm always here, Rayna, if you ever….if you ever need to just talk. I'm still here."
"Thank you, Deacon. It means a lot. That's kind of why I called you. Because there is something you can do, something I need you to do for me."
"Anything, Rayna. What is it?"
"I need you to get tested as a bone marrow match for Maddie, because there's a good chance you could be one. Because…because you're her biological father, Deacon."
"What are you talking about, Rayna? What do you mean?"
"Deacon, I….I found out I was pregnant. And were you drinking again, you'd already been to rehab four times and it hadn't worked. I was terrified. I didn't know what to do or who was even the father. I talked to Teddy and he offered to marry me, and to raise the baby no matter what. I was tired, Deacon. I was tired of taking care of you, of hoping and being devastated more times than I could count. I was exhausted from being scared of if you were alive or not. But I stayed and I took it. But I couldn't put all that weight on my child too. All that uncertainty. And Cole, he said I should cut you loose. That it'd be your best chance and maybe your last at staying sober, so that's what I did."
"How's it even possible, Rayna?! When did we…when were we even together? I don't remember….otherwise…maybe….I never even suspected…."
"Isn't that the point, Deacon? The fact that you can't remember. That's how bad things were."
"So you lied to me, Rayna? Every single day since, you looked me in the eyes and lied. And you brought me back to your band. Back on tour. You let me hold her. And love her. You made me her Uncle Deacon. For what? Just to keep me close to a whole life you were keeping from me? How dare you!"
"Don't you put this all on me! Don't you dare try to act like I'm the only one who got us here! I wanted that life with you. I wanted to be your wife and to raise our family up together. But Jesus Christ, Deacon, you couldn't stay sober. Not for our gigs, for our careers, and not for me. I was not going to take that same gamble with a child, Deacon."
"Were you ever going to tell me? Did you think I'd ever deserve to know. I'm sober, Rayna. I've been sober for almost a year. I mean I got sober and I found out you didn't wait for me, Rayna. You got married and built a family, and you did it without me."
Tears pricked Rayna's eyes and began streaming down her face.
"How was I supposed to know that the fifth time in rehab would actually stick? I couldn't wait any longer, Deacon. I was….we were out of time," Rayna cried out.
They stood in silence for a few minutes as the weight of their past and present colliding into one, hung in the air.
"So, what now, Ray?" Deacon whispered, "I get tested and maybe I'm a match, maybe I'm not. But either way, what am I supposed to do. Just pretend like nothing's happened and go back to being Uncle Deacon?"
"I….I don't know, Deacon. I don't know how this is supposed to work. I don't know if you want to be a part of Maddie's life or not. But I do know that she needs this transplant. And if you want that chance with her, Deacon, she has to be here for it. I know you're beyond angry with me, Deacon. I know that. So don't do it for me. Do it for her. For our daughter, Deacon. Cause she needs you."
"I just….I just need a minute. I'm so mad, Rayna. I just…I need a second for it all. And I need that without you here. Because right now, Rayna. I can't even look at you. Cause all I see is all those little moments I missed. I picture her first steps, first time she smiled or laughed. I imagine singing her to sleep and rocking her when she cries. I look at you and I see everything I didn't get, everything you denied me. So, right now, I need you to go."
"Okay. I understand. But, Deacon, Maddie can't afford for you to take too much time," Rayna said as she made her way to the door.
"I need you to promise me something, Deacon. You have to promise me that you're not going to go and drink. That you're not going to throw away everything you've worked for over this. For Maddie's sake."
Rayna reached out hesitantly and squeezed his hand. He kept his eyes to the floor but she could make out the burning pain in them.
"Show me I was wrong," Rayna whispered before she walked out the door.
