17. Moving Forward

(16 Weeks)

Beckett sat at her temporary desk, Montgomery's office desk, completely frustrated. It had been three weeks and they still were nowhere to catching his killer.

She rubbed her belly. It had grown so much and she still had another five months to go. She felt bigger than sixteen weeks pregnant. Rubbing her belly brought her a sense of calm. Taking care of herself and her baby were the two things in her life that she felt she could control and so far things had been going well in those regards.

Last week she and Castle had a doctor's appointment with Addison. It was a routine checkup. Beckett's weight was normal for her fifteenth week. The baby was also at a descent size, now the size of a _.

As Beckett began to rummage through Montgomery's desk drawers, in hopes that she would find something that would be connected to his murder or what he was involved with that led to him getting killed, she discovered a folded piece of paper under some old files at the bottom drawer addressed with her name on it.

She pulled it to the top of the desk, unfolded it and began to read.

Kate,

You're probably wondering by now where did I go wrong, why didn't I see this coming? And if I had why couldn't I have tried to stop him? Truth is no one saw it coming and I meant to keep it that way.

I can't tell you much except to say that what I did really screwed things up in my past and everything I did from that moment on was to make up for it. And then when I saw you for the first time I felt as if I had been given a second chance so I made it my job to protect you.

I know that's vague and I know you want the answers but I know you Kate and if I give you a name I know you'll go after them and you won't stop.

Trust me when I tell you that your life is more than your mother's murder, it's more than mine. You moving forward and having a baby of your own is proof of that.

I could've kicked Castle to the curb ay time I wanted to. Only reason I kept him around this long was because I saw how good he was for you.

Kate, you're the best that I've ever trained, maybe the best I've ever seen but you weren't having any fun before he came along.

We speak for the dead, that's the job. We are all that's left once the wicked rob them of their voices. We owe them that but we don't owe them our lives so you want to honor me, honor your mom, live the life you've created with Castle, live your life for that baby of yours. You'll get justice for us someday but don't do it at the expense of your family by pushing them away. You're too good for that.

See you on the other side some day, Detective.

Your Captain,

Roy Montgomery

There was a knock on the door which startled Beckett. She quickly wiped away her tears before folding the letter and placing it in her pocket.

"Sorry to interrupt," said the woman who came into the office.

"You're not interrupting ma'am. How can I help you?"

"If my mother drops by you can call her ma'am. Call me sir or captain. Captain Victoria Gates."

Beckett stood as quickly as she was able and began taking her few belongings.

"It's all yours sir," Beckett said as the two women exchanged places, Gates behind the desk and Beckett in front.

"I'm Detective Beckett."

"Detective Beckett," said Gates, "Your reputation precedes you: youngest woman in the NYPD to make detective. You beat me by six weeks."

"I didn't realize people kept score."

"Everyone keeps score detective otherwise there'd be no expectations to be met. I've heard and I see you're expecting. Congratulations."

"Thank you, sir."

"I have two girls myself. I trust you'll be able to make both work."

"I appreciate the confidence."

"Now about Montgomery's case: three weeks and no leads, not even shoe prints?"

"No sir, but there are still places we can look."

"I'll give it a week and then I'm closing it."

"With all due respect sir but that seems a little short doesn't it?"

"Excuse me?"

"Sir you're new here. Don't those of us who have worked with Roy Montgomery owe it to him to bring his killer to justice?"

"I don't know what kind of justice you want but I will not have my precinct be a place for vigilante justice or vendettas. One week, detective and if you and your team have nothing by the end of it, I'm closing the case. I won't be utilizing resources that could be used elsewhere are we clear?"

"Yes sir."

Just as Beckett was about to leave and open the door, Castle opened it casually much to Gates' distain.

"Can I help you with something," Gates said to him.

Castle looked at the office and then at Beckett's old desk.

"Am I in the right place," Castle asked.

"What do you want Mr. Castle," Gates said all ready familiar with the writer.

He perked up and smiled, "My lovely fiancé," he said.

Gates couldn't see the look Beckett was giving Castle as she shook her head at him. She did turn her attention to Beckett though.

"You're engaged to this man?"

Beckett turned to her new boss. "Yes sir," she said.

"Well then let me tell you both something: my precinct has no room for a dilatant writer playing cop. You want to play cop you best stick to your fiction, Mr. Castle, and leave the real work to the real police."

"Ma'am-," said Castle.

"Sir," Gates corrected.

"Sir," said Castle, "I'm sure you run a nice tight ship but I'm more than just a writer at this point."

"It's true sir," Beckett said as she stood up for him, "Castle has become a consultant, an asset to the NYPD. Without him many of our cases would have gone unsolved or we would have gotten the wrong person. He can help."

"Feel free to call the mayor if you'd like," said Castle.

Gates looked at the two of them. In less than an hour she was being double teamed. She reluctantly picked up the phone and dialed the mayor's office.

After a couple of minutes she hung up.

"You think you're clever, Mr. Castle, going around my back like that? Well let me tell you the score, I don't care how powerful your friends are, you screw up at all on my watch and I'll prosecute you to the fullest extent of the law. You understand me?"

"Yes sir."

"And one more thing, if either of you do not act professionally in my precinct, not only will I kick Mr. Castle out, Detective, I will bump you down to traffic for a year."

"I don't think it'll be a problem sir."

"Okay then now get out of my office."

Beckett smiled at Castle when they left the office.

"Showing her up with the mayor," she said to him.

"Hey it worked didn't it? So you ready to get out of this place?"

"I really am. Remy's?" she asked.

Castle offered her his arm which she placed hers in and they hooked, "Craving one of their shakes I see?"

"Not just the shakes but the burgers too."

Castle laughed a little, "Then let's get momma something to eat before she bites my head off."

Kate Beckett sat on the swing the next morning before going to work. The very one that she had sat on months ago when she first told Castle she was pregnant. At sixteen weeks the spot wasn't as comfortable as it had been the first time but the location felt right, having become a place for serious conversation and this was one of them.

"I liked the dedication," Beckett said to her fiancé, Castle having given her a copy of his completed manuscript for the next Nikki Heat novel a couple weeks ago. She had now, over the past couple of days barely gotten around to reading it.

"It seemed right," he replied.

"It must have been hard writing that ending."

"Yeah, yeah given the circumstances, yeah."

"I'm glad you didn't tell me about it," she told him, "After what happened the past three weeks I'm not sure I could have handled it but thank you for letting me read the manuscript before you turned it in."

Castle had a sad look on his face as he looked at Beckett, "You didn't have to read it you know? I mean I know the final book won't be ready for another month and a half but you didn't have to read the final version."

Beckett took his hand, "I know."

"I thought by not telling you what was going to happen that I could protect you."

"I know you did."

"With everything you're going through: Montgomery's death, the pregnancy, I didn't want to add to your stress or your pain."

"I know you didn't and I love you for that, Castle."

"Then why'd you read it?"

Beckett gave a soft smile. "Because you wrote it," she said.

Castle didn't quite understand.

Beckett took a deep breath. "Rick, I never told you this but back when my mom died I discovered your books, the ones before Derrick Storm. I became such a fan. They were about murder and intrigue. Considering my mom's murder you'd think that'd be the last thing I'd want to read about but your books helped get me through, Castle," she said as she looked at him, "Your words are what saved me when no one or nothing else could. It gave me the strength I needed to help my dad."

"I didn't know."

"How could you but now you do. That's why I was able to read Heat Rises. Yes, Roy just died a few of weeks ago but reading your book before it went out to print, it helped the same way your books always have. And you want to know the best part," Beckett said with a smile.

"Tell me."

"This time I've actually got you."

Castle smiled as he stood up and reached for Beckett to help her to a standing position. He leaned forward, her pregnant belly between them and kissed her deeply.

After a moment they both needed to come up for some air.

"So I've been thinking," said Beckett, "I don't want to wait until after the baby's born to get married to you. I want to be married to you now."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Beckett said with a smile.

"So what changed your mind?"

Beckett reached into her pocket for the letter she still carried with her. "Just something Montgomery said. Our job is to speak for the dead but we don't owe them our lives. I spent nearly most of my adult life trying to find my mom's killer and something tells me that Montgomery had those answers but I don't want another moment to go by where I'm obsessed with the job and not living my life. I'm ready to live my life Castle, with you and with our baby. So what do you say Richard Edgar Alexander Rogers Castle, will you marry me?"

Castle took Beckett's hand and smiled at the love of his life.

"Katherine Houghton Beckett," he said, "I was thinking the exact same thing, sort of. If Montgomery's death has taught me one thing, it's that life can be taken at any moment before we realize it. I don't' want to waste another second where I'm not married to you so yes, yes, I will marry you. Right here, right now if that's what it takes but I think I have a better place in mind. Now you go to work and give me twenty-four hours. By this time tomorrow your dad will be walking you down the aisle."

Beckett smiled at him and tiptoed up so that she could reach him, their lips coming together and kissing deeply.