A/N) I'm saying nothing!

Twisting Time

Chapter 45

It was when he heard Harry's yell that James turned and saw the body of his best friend lying motionless on the floor in front of his son. Magic sprouted from his wand as anger rushed through his mind and soul, unleashing with catastrophic effect. Both of his and Remus' opponents went flying, their backs crashing into two separate trees, their heads snapping back and bashing into the bark.

James didn't hesitate any longer. He was the first to run forward towards Sirius' prone body on the ground. His wand was clenched tightly in his hand and he collapsed to his knees besides his friend's body. "No!" It could not be…

Sirius was stark white, his chest completely still and his eyes were still open, completely blank, the life having left them the moment he had been hit.

"Padfoot…" James hung his head, feeling more anger coursing through him. And that was when he heard it: the high pitched crackle of Bellatrix Lestrange.

"I killed Sirius Black! I killed Sirius Black!"

He sprung to his feet and sought her out. She was dancing away, between flashes of red light as others sought to stun her, continuing to chant those very words. She was far too quick for them but James didn't care anymore. He was not above killing.

"YOU BITCH!"

He raised his wand, moved it slightly to the right and just as she leapt to the right to dodge a stunner from Kingsley, James let out a roar of power, as he focused all his energy upon his magic. He didn't know what spell he cast, was only aware of a variety of colours meshing from his wand, and headed straight towards Bellatrix, who danced right in the way of the strikes.

She didn't have time to move.

The magic struck her body, tearing through her. Blood poured forth from multiple wounds over her body. She choked on blood, spitting it out, eyes widening in surprise. And then her legs gave way and she collapsed into an ever increasing pool of blood. Anger rocked through him and he felt his anger building again. Killing Bellatrix Lestrange once wasn't enough. He wanted to do it again.

And again.

And again.

"James…" Lily's soft voice broke through the shroud of anger colouring his thoughts.

Slowly, he turned his head towards his wife. One hand rested on his shoulder, the other reaching for his wand. He let her take it. He felt his knees collapsing again and he allowed himself to fall to the dirty and muddy floor. "He saved Harry…" He understood what Sirius had done, had sacrificed but it still hurt. "Why didn't he shove Harry out of the way magically?"

"Because he had used up so much magic that he may not have had the power to do so. Sirius was the only one close enough to Harry to be able to do anything about it. If it wasn't Sirius, James, it would have been me or Harry himself," explained Lily quietly. "Sirius saved Harry… Even if he paid the ultimate price for it."

"He can't be… He can't be…" James whispered brokenly. "He came back once before, he could again. He has to. Sirius doesn't deserve this fate."

"Prongs… I think Sirius knew he was going to die," said Remus quietly, kneeling down beside James. "He may have been brought back but what if it was only for a short while?"

James hissed angrily and turned his head to look at Remus. He was about to issue a curt response when he noticed the unshed tears shimmering in Remus' eyes. He was trying to hold in the grief he felt. Sirius' body still lay in front of him. James reached out and pressed Sirius' eyelids closed. Now he didn't look dead, just sleeping, a slumber from which he would wake up from. He felt his anger drift away, replaced by sadness and sorrow at losing his closest friend.

"But if he knew he was going to die why didn't he tell us? We could have stopped it from happening!" exclaimed James.

"He acted in the moment," said Lily quietly. "It hurts that he did this… but it is over. James, the war is over. We've won. And it's because of Sirius."

A tear trickled down James' face and he wiped it away. He reached forward and held Sirius' cold hand. "He risked everything to change the future. He took on the burden of responsibility that wasn't his to begin with. He did everything to make sure we lived and Harry was normal. But why couldn't he have had the same?"

"We won't ever know, Prongs," said Remus quietly. "I know this is hard but we cannot mourn his loss now. We still have work to do."

Remus was right. James nodded, swallowed his pride and rose to his feet. As both Dumbledore and Sirius was dead, it had been agreed that James would take charge. He had to avoid falling into the black hole that threatened to consume him.

He had to be strong.

Had to be loyal.

Had to be brave.

Like a Gryffindor.

Harry had expected to die. He had not thought he would live. But when his mind registered that Sirius was dead right in front of him he just stared in shock at the sacrifice his godfather had made. He knew he was dead. The first thought that rushed through his brain was that it should have been him. Harry should have died yet he had not.

He didn't even see his father kill Bellatrix Lestrange, only aware that Remus was beside him, shaking him carefully.

"Harry. Harry. Harry!"

"Remus?" Harry shook his head, confusion settling in. "Is, is, is he really… gone?"

"I'm sorry, Harry."

That was all Harry needed to hear that Sirius was dead.

"He shouldn't have done that," said Harry quietly. "It should have been me."

"No one should have died," said Remus quietly. "But they do. Those that live on just have to accept it but we will always remember them. Sirius wouldn't want it any other way."

Harry nodded slowly. He still felt numb.

"I need to go to your mum and dad now, okay?" continued Remus, squeezing Harry's shoulder. "If you need anything just ask."

The first thing James did was bring Sirius' body back to Hogwarts where it was carefully warded and protected by the Hogwarts Professors in a chamber off of the Great Hall. The same honour was applied to Dumbledore. The second part was informing the Ministry of Magic of the events that had transpired. The Minister of Magic had not been happy with their actions but did not condemn them publicly for fear of the backlash from the public. Privately, Cornelius Fudge tore into them, but James couldn't bring himself to care.

Amelia Bones also faced sanctions for signing off on a mission that had not had Ministry approval and could have resulted in forcing Voldemort to target the Ministry if he had survived. Thankfully because the mission was a success and had resulted in the deaths of Voldemort and a few of his followers and the recapture of many it was unlikely Amelia Bones would face any long term punishment.

The Ministry announced Sirius and Dumbledore's deaths, dedicating a large portion of their weekly newsletter to their lives. The Daily Prophet also carried many tributes, though Dumbledore had significantly less coverage than Sirius. Sirius was a hero to the people and his death had struck them an awful blow. Despite ending the war, the people of the Wizarding World wished that Sirius Black had survived.

A week after Sirius' death, James returned home just after five in the afternoon where he found his youngest son sitting underneath a photograph James had put up in Sirius' memory. It was a photo of James and Sirius, at just eleven years old, goofing around as Remus had taken the picture. Jack hadn't really been too badly affected by his time with Voldemort. He had a few bruises which they had found on his arms and back but other than that he was generally well. They suspected the bruises had been caused by Jack struggling when they had originally taken him from Bathilda.

"Jack?" James asked hesitantly, kneeling down beside his son. "Are you okay?"

The boy sniffled and wiped his nose with his forearm. "No."

"You can tell me you know," said James.

"I know." Jack wrapped his arms around himself. "Sirius wouldn't have died if I hadn't got myself in trouble."

James nearly groaned out loud but that wouldn't be the correct way to solve this situation. "It's not your fault. Voldemort thought this out far too well. If Voldemort hadn't taken you, he would have taken someone else. The results would have been the same. Sirius died saving your brother. He would have been proud of that. Sirius was always the type who would do crazy stuff instead of taking the more simpler route."

"He might not have died?" Jack was quick to catch the meaning behind his father's words.

"It all depends on circumstances," James continued, aware he had to be careful with how he explained things around his youngest. "Sirius had little time to think about what he could do. He just did the first thing that came to mind. He acted on instinct. You'll only really understand if you ever find yourself in that position." He hated the thought of any of his children sacrificing their lives to save others. He wanted them to live long lives, to be happy and enjoy themselves, rather than having to fight in a war in which your next breath could very well be your last. "I hope you never do find yourself in that type of situation." He reached out and pulled Jack into a hug, rubbing his back.

"Dad… does the pain ever go away?"

James swallowed. "It will do. Losing someone you love always hurts but you will heal. Trust me, Jack."

But at that moment even James didn't feel he could trust himself. Sirius' death was too raw. Too close for him to process. He just wished he could speak to him one last time.

And that was when an idea formed in his mind.

"My head hurts," Harry sobered, walking into the kitchen. He looked pale and tired and his usually bright green eyes had lost their sparkle.

Lily placed the knife down she was using to cut the vegetables and sat down at the table, with Harry seating himself on the other side. "What's up?"

"I feel like my head is missing something. Like it is trying to heal over the wound and it hurts."

"Ah…" Lily realised instantly what was happening. Harry's deep connection with Sirius had been severed and he was suffering through the healing process as his mind attempted to recover from the loss of such a close bond.

Harry rubbed his forehead hard. "It's Sirius' bond with me, isn't it?"

Lily nodded. "I think it is."

"It's because he died, right? I can sort of feel like it is trying to grow again. Or something is…" he hesitated. He didn't understand it.

"How long has your head been hurting for?"

Harry shrugged. "A few days. I didn't notice the tear in my head until a few days ago… I think it was because I was trying to process what happened. Sirius died to save me… And I still think it should have been me." He knew his mother wouldn't be happy with him if he said that but he needed to get it off his chest. "If it was my time, why did he save me?"

Lily composed herself, remaining calm. "Harry, you were meant to be happy. Have a good life. Sirius sacrificed everything to ensure that you can. Sirius may be gone but the people that love him will still be here. He won't ever leave us. Sirius will watch over us, like he always has done, only now… he's invisible."

Harry blinked away a few tears. He hadn't cried in a long time. He felt like he should be. It wasn't fair Sirius was gone but it had happened. There wasn't anything they could do to change it. But it didn't mean he had to accept it just yet. "I want him back."

Lily reached across the table and grasped her son's hand. "We all do, Harry."

"I miss him in my head," sniffed Harry. Tears threatened in the corner of his eyes and then the dam broke. He allowed himself to cry as his mother walked round the table to join him and pull him into a hug. He didn't know how long he cried for but ultimately it helped to let the grief out.

In his fingers he held the resurrection stone.

It lay on his palm. James looked at it carefully, wondering if he was doing the right thing. He needed closure to the pain he was still in. He couldn't think of any other way to help himself. He just hoped he would get the answers he craved.

Closing his eyes, he carefully turned the stone over three times. When he opened them, a smile broke across his face, as he saw who stood in front of him.

To be continued...

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I'm still saying nothing.

Until next time,

the-writer1988