A/N: I'm moving this up to a T rating for language. Sorry the writing is so rushed. I realize adjectives exist. I just had to get it out. I've got a couple boring classes tomorrow, and I can probably get another chapter done then.

Also, sorry about killing Henry. Believe me, it pains me, too.

Elizabeth woke up in Henry's hospital room with his arms wrapped around her. She had hoped this would all be a dream. It wasn't a dream, but at least she was with Henry.

When she sat up, Henry opened his eyes. They needed to have the conversation. She needed time to prepare herself. But he didn't want to do it to her. He didn't want to explain to her how she was going to have to live without him.

There was a knock on the door, the doctor wanted to come in and see them. He entered with a file in hand.

"Glad to see you two together." The doctor smiled down at his patient.

"Do you have any updates?" Elizabeth was ready and hungry for information.

The doctor raised an eyebrow in Henry's direction, and Henry shook his head slightly.

"Well, we ran some tests on Henry's immune system to see how much damage had been done by the radiation. Those results were not good. We found negligible immune activity. It's possible his system is in shock and that activity will pick up again, but it's very unlikely. We can't know exactly how much radiation he was exposed to, but the other patients who were in his vicinity have suffered a lethal dose of radiation. We need to be prepared for end of life issues. I'm so sorry."

Elizabeth didn't know what to do. How was she supposed to respond? There was no response possible. Denial was the only response.

The doctor looked at her stricken face. "I'll give you some time. Have the nurses page me if you have any questions at all. I'm giving you the card of our pastoral counseling service. Feel free to call them if you would like to arrange for religious advising."

With that, the doctor left the room. Elizabeth was surprised at how he could say so little and still completely upend her life.

Henry looked at his wife. She looked so young and vulnerable. She wasn't old by any means, but they were decidedly middle aged, and she was normally anything but vulnerable. And yet here they were.

"Baby?" Henry couldn't tell what she was thinking.

Elizabeth hugged him fiercely, her arms holding his neck so tight he could barely breathe. She was shaking, as if she were sobbing, but no tears came. Henry rubbed her back, trying to comfort her, but knowing there was nothing he could do to make it okay.

He was going to die. The only thing he could do now was try to use the time he had left to help his wife and children with the transition.

But right now, Henry didn't know how to help. He held her close, allowing her to process what she had learned.

"I'm still here, baby. I've got you."

"I don't have anything to say yet. Just... It's a lot to take in." Elizabeth couldn't stop trembling.

"I know. Take your time. We have some time."

"How can you say 'take your time'? I can't take my time! There's no time!" She was getting very worked up.

"Elizabeth. Stop. Freaking out isn't going to help." Henry put a stop to her anger. He pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

She deflated, falling against his chest, hiding her face in his shirt. Still, no tears would come, but Henry's hand held her to him, trying to still her shaking.

"We do have some time, okay? I know it's not enough time. But we have at least a few days. This isn't a 24 hours to live thing."

She smiled. They had always made fun of such clichés.

"Okay. Sorry I freaked out." Elizabeth didn't want to spend any of his remaining time being angry or fearful.

"It's okay. This is going to be an emotional roller coaster. We need to just acknowledge that."

"I don't want to waste time. Not when we only have a few days."

"I know. But you know how repressing things doesn't help. I'm still here for now. I want to help you with what I can. I need to know I've done all I can for you."

She kissed him, holding his face tenderly, still lying practically on top of him in his hospital bed. "You're so amazing, you know that?"

Henry smiled. "I guess I do."

"But Henry... How are you okay with just... How are you okay with this?" Elizabeth didn't understand how her husband had come to terms with it so quickly.

"I know it's scary, baby. It's scary. But it doesn't change anything. I mean, it changes everything... Let me start over." Henry took a breath. "Okay. When we got married, I had three goals. I wanted to engage mentally with great religious minds, I wanted to honor you and our marriage, and I wanted to raise beautiful children who would know how much we loved them. I have done all of those things. I know I've done my best in pretty much every situation, given the circumstances. That's all I could do. And now, what I can do is make sure you and the kids are going to be alright."

"Oh god… The kids. What am I going to tell them? I can't tell them this. Henry, I can't… They can't. I can't do this." Her words sounded hollow. Her eyes remained dry.

"Yes, you can. You don't have to tell them anything. I'll tell them, okay? I'll talk to them. But we don't have to do that immediately. Are they at home now?"

"Yeah. I think so. They were cleared out of the hospital, and I think the detail took them home."

"Okay. Well, when you've got your bearings, we'll have them come over."

"Why are you the one who is put together when…?"

"When I'm the one dying?"

"Don't say that." This conversation was just too emotionally distressing for Elizabeth to handle. It was too much for anyone.

"It's the truth, honey. I get that it'll take a while to accept, but it's real."

"Even so… How are you so fucking fine with it?" She was deeply annoyed that he appeared to be taking this likely. Her world had no light left in it, and he didn't seem concerned at all.

"Moving into anger, are you?"

"Henry, I swear to God…" Maybe he had a point.

"Babe, I've studied religion for how many years now? This is all we talk about practically. I've made my peace with the world. The only unfinished business I have is with you."

"What do you mean?" Elizabeth was confused.

"I mean I need you to be able to move on. Not right now. Not next week or next month. But I need you to be able to find happiness again."

"There's no way." She was positive that there was no way for her life to ever be the same.

"It'll be different. I know. But you can't wall yourself off. I know you. You're going to try to throw yourself into work, and then you're going to break down eventually, and I'm not going to be there to help you find your way again."

"Then tell me what to do if you're so smart." It seemed that Henry was being awfully condescending.

He gave her a hard look. After a few seconds, his eyes moved to the window in his room. "I don't know what to tell you. I don't have that answer worked out for you. I don't think I can tell you what to do. You're gonna have to figure it out, though."

"I can't take this conversation anymore. This is ridiculous. Stop patronizing me. I need some space. I'll be back." She got up quickly, leaving the room. Her thoughts were disjointed. They lacked the forward momentum that usually propelled her mind.

Leaving the hospital, she went to check on the kids.

They were sitting together on the sofa glued to the television. When she walked in the door, they descended upon her in a flurry of hugs and kisses.

"Is everything okay?" "Where's Dad?" "What was the bunker like?" "Is Dad going to be okay?" "Are there missiles in the bunker?" "Why did they bomb us?"

In spite of everything, Elizabeth smiled. Leave it to Jason to ask about the bunker having missiles. Taking a breath, she reminded herself that that conversation was a little less pressing.

"Your dad is in the hospital. We're going to go see him in a few minutes. He's awake and talking. Pack a bag with a change of clothes and your phone chargers then meet down here in ten minutes."

Stevie ushered Jason upstairs. Ali stayed downstairs, looking at the floor. "Is Dad really okay? Did he get caught in the radiation?"

"We'll answer all your questions once we get to the hospital. Promise. Just get your stuff for now."

"Okay, Mom." With that, Ali went upstairs to pack her bag.

I didn't know today would be our last
Or that I'd have to say goodbye to you so fast
I'm so numb, I can't feel anymore
Prayin' you'd just walk back through that door
And tell me that I was only dreamin'
You're not really gone as long as I believe

- Jealous of the Angels, Jenn Bostic