"What?" I ask incredulously, my head snapping up from the crook of her neck. Jade doesn't miss a beat. "Oh well." She sighs, leaning in again. "Wait." I rush out, and catch her face to stop her. My arm around her neck tightens instinctively, now that I've lost my support. Her eyebrows are hunched in strain and do her eyes look...darker? I brush her cheek with the pad of my thumb and watch the sternness of her expression ebb away.
I really want to take things slow, but I've been in love with this girl since I was fourteen. She ambles towards me again and kisses me softly for a moment, then pulls back and meets my gaze with hazy, yet excited eyes. "Yes?"
"Can we...slow down?" She nods and rests her forehead against mine for a moment, she appears to be gathering herself. She looks almost...in pain. I run my fingers through her hair. "Are you okay?" I ask. Another pause, then she nods slightly. "Yeah, I just... I'm not easy or anything," she laughs and I smile sympathetically "I just...you..." Her face scrunches up again, and I press my lips to her forehead. She sighs and bows her head on my chest.
"God, you even smell good." She mumbles. I laugh, and I'm glad she cant see me blushing for the thousandth time since she arrived.
...
She's tucked under my arm, bleeding heat into my side. I love holding her like this. I wonder if she feels safe. As safe as I feel when she holds me.
I feel her start to grind against me, a light squeeze on my thigh. She exhales a small moan into my hair, the warmth surrounds us. "I can feel you doing that." The squeezing stops and her cold nose traces my collarbone. "I'm sorry." She sighs wistfully. Summer always has her like this.
"Do you want me to touch you?" She pulls away and looks me in the eye, before nodding eagerly.
"Talk to me first." I request. She dips her head and laps at my neck, then drags her teeth to my collar bone. She starts up her ministrations again, and the combination of these things cause my eyes slam shut.
"Tan skin..." she pants, dropping kisses all over my skin. "Blue blood...fresh bruises..." She mumbles, kissing the rakes her teeth left. "Its red skin...coating blue veins...like rivers...that bruises..."
I roll us over, and her dress pools around her hips. I take two fingers and drag them up her thigh. I don't stop till they're constricted by soft, wet nerves. "It's p-practically screaming...its real... you're real... feel me..." She gasps. I love when she rambles on like this, barely making sense, hardly forming words.
I press my lips to her skin. "What else?" "Blue blood... so cold." She whines. I continue rubbing along her tight walls. "Tan skin, angry skin, warm skin..." she rants. I feel her clench around me but I know she's still a ways from letting go. "My body... My body!" She cries.
I'd laugh if it wasn't so hot, knowing I'm what reduces her usually eloquent speech to this mess. "my body...help it eat...hear it breathe when I don't... It loves-" her voice cracks "loves blue bruises...give it what it wants...my body... to protect...my body..." She trails off. Whereas before she was simply meeting the pace of my hands, her thrusts are getting more frantic now, and I know I wont get much more out of her. "I'm so close now... beating of my heart... it's in my hands now..."
I watch the tiny beads of sweat forming on her skin, and affectionately wipe her crown. Her eyes roll back into her head and when they return they're black as the pit. She bites her lip and begins breathing roughly through her nose. She rolls us over again and I soak up her writhing form, wrapping my arms around her neck, keeping her bucking body close as she finishes over me.
My eyes look past her twitching form and watch the swaying trees in the distance. The soft moans she pants in my ear mix the warm breeze swirling around us. She pounds against me twice, expels a quiet mewl, half heartedly presses against me once more, then sags. I take no offense, I know I'm not fast enough for her sometimes.
I place one hand on the back of her neck and run the other through her hair, waiting for her breathing to even out. "You're sweating." I tease. She laughs and mumbles something incoherent before nuzzling my neck. I press my lips to her sweat rimmed crown and close my eyes, marvelously content.
My eyes open slowly. That was...knew. Not the sex, we took the next ethereal step when I turned 16 and it became a part of my life. I was like...another person. It was more like living a memory than any of the other dreams. Usually they're just mix-matched situations, her telling me she loves me, us laughing in a non descript room, or us sharing an intimate moment.
That was specific. I felt the breeze I hd been thinking about. The trees around us elicited a sense of familiarity. All of it seemed so commonplace. Maybe I'm closer to finding out why I'm having these dreams. Obviously they have to do with Jade, but what do they mean?
...
"Hi Lane." I chirp, plopping down on his couch. He looks at me with wide eyes. "Well, hello Tori. You seem awfully chipper." "Yeah..." I sigh dreamily. After she calmed herself down Jade began a cavalcade of I'm sorrys, and after she calmed down again she drove me home. She blamed her forwardness on being a horn dog, but I know its us.
We're supposed to be together, and she must feel it too. I know why I feel so connected to her, but she doesn't. That combined with her self proclaimed impulsiveness, aptly justifies her behavior, I think.
"Care to share?" For the first time since yesterday my smile falls. What am I supposed to tell him? I skipped school to get groped by my literal dream girl? "I had a nice time with Jade yesterday." He looks giddy. "I'm so happy for you! Jade wouldn't tell me anything." He grumbles. "Has this had any affect on your dreams?" He asks hopefully. I hand him the note book. I wrote down a more school appropriate dream I had a couple days ago, and strayed from describing her too specifically.
Lane begins to frown as his eyes scan my first entry. He sighs and hands the book back. "I guess not." He says, likely to himself. He puts on a smile before addressing me properly. "Well, Rome wasn't built in a day. I'm sure if you take some time and explore this new aspect if your life, things will change."
"Sure." I respond, an equally false smile touching my lips.
...
I leave Lanes room to find Jade waiting for me again. "Hi." I greet, a little breathlessly. "Hey." She says, noting my reaction. "I thought... you would wanna like, eat lunch together again." She looks at me and after a moment I realize she's waiting for an answer. "Of course." I respond, and that little half smirk slides onto her face. She looks me up and down, then a second later her eyes meet mine and she holds out her hand.
When she was ranting apologizes she said something about just liking contact with me, on a mental level as well as physical. I slide my hand into hers and try to calm my insides as she walks me to the cafeteria.
...
"This school doesn't have that many options for me, so I always bring something from home. But my tables just over there-" I point to our usual spot. "Just go get your lunch and I'll meet you there." I smile brightly, but she looks at our joined hands and frowns. I roll my eyes. "Just hurry up." She laughs and kisses my cheek before heading off towards the lunch line. I shiver at the contact and practically skip towards the table.
"What're you so happy about?" Cat questions suspiciously as I take my seat. "I made a friend." Andre coos. "Oooh a friend! And might we assume she's of the girl variety?" I laugh and try to shake off the blush heating up my cheeks. "No...not exactly. We just met yesterday, shes new here." I explain. Robbie stops trying to feed his puppet and joins the conversation. "You don't mean Jade, do you?!" My enthusiasm subsides a bit, and I nod warily.
"She gave Ryder a black eye the first day of school! She's practically a legend already!" He exclaims. "A dangerous legend." Beck intercepts darkly. "Are you sure you should be hanging out with her?" He asks calmly. I resist the urge to call him mom. Becks always been like a brother to me. We met in middle school and ever since then hes been looking out for me, it makes sense he'd be worried about something like this.
"Trust me, she's not threat." I look at Robbie "Don't believe the hype." Beck nods and continues eating his meal. "Besides, Ryder had it coming." He freezes and raises a shocked eyebrow at me, and I have to laugh.