Oh dear God!
Rating: K+
Pairing: J/C
Summary: A surprise gift awaits the Captain once she and the Commander return from New Earth
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters (sadly)
Author's Note: Some angst as it is the beginning of a relationship and there are doubts but its all good in the end. Enjoy
That-geek-in-a-hat
=/\=
She couldn't sleep. She had been back on Voyager for just shy of a week now and still the memories of that experience haunted her sleeping moments. It was always him there caressing her like he had done on New Earth, the taste of him still lingered on her tongue as they had shared long kisses, what was wrong with her she was supposedly engaged to another man.
She had distanced herself from him but that made it worse. Deciding sleep was elusive she went through to the living area flopping down onto her couch she picked up Tuvok's security report.
The report hadn't helped she had been reading the same sentence for the last 30 minutes. Looking at the clock it read 0245. Pondering he drifted into her thoughts again.
"Computer locate Commander Chakotay" she asked to the empty room
"Commander Chakotay is in his quarters" the voice of the computer answered.
"Is he sleeping?" she found herself asking
"Negative" it shocked her what was bothering him? Boldly she got up and took the few steps to his door.
=/\=
Chakotay was tossing and turning finding himself to awake to sleep decided to start his log, maybe getting this off his chest would help. He'd have to bend a little how he felt, because if Kathryn found the log, he'd be mortified. He had loved their time on New Earth, she was so beautiful to him and she didn't see that in herself, and wished they were still there enjoying whatever life would bring them their. He was clinging to the memories he had of her, together with himself. She did things no woman had ever done to him before. He wanted to be allowed to love her again but she didn't love him back he would just have to burn their memories into his mind. The sound of someone at his door surprised him but he got up to answer it.
"Who on earth is up at this time?" he thought to himself as walked to the door.
"Kathryn?" he questioned seeing her in her pink satin robe.
"I couldn't sleep, I was wondering if we could talk" he moved aside and let her in.
=/\=
They sat on the sofa at opposite ends. She had asked for tea and he had some too.
"What did you want to talk about?" he asked sipping his tea. It was at this moment Kathryn realised she had no idea why she had come her, maybe she thought it would calm her down.
"I…I don't know. I should go. I'm sorry for disturbing you. Goodnight commander" she stood to leave but he grabbed her wrist pulling her down.
"I know why you're here. You want to apologise about how close we got because we can't have a relationship on Voyager. I know the risk it will pose but I think….I want that." She looked at him confused. "What I'm saying is your worth the risk, I feel completely at peace knowing you've let me in." she blinked trying to put words together
"I can't. I have a responsibility to this crew…" she whittled away as she saw his eyes. "I want to but I can't. I'm supposed to be engaged, I already feel terrible about how I feel about you and I can't allow this to go further, I'm too involved with my duty to this ship. Please understand, I need time to know." He tried to hide his disappointment and went to say something she suddenly yawned.
"I understand Kathryn, just don't shut me out. Never forget me" she reached for his check but stood running towards his bathroom, he heard her retching and rushed to her aide. He held her hair away from her face and rubbed her back.
"Was what I said really that sickening" he joked she continued to wretch and his heart broke a little as he saw her condition.
"I'm sorry. It's not you, it's me" she said sleepily. It was now 0330 so people would be coming back from shifts and it would be too risky to walk back to her quarters so the two sat back down and began talking, about everything deciding it best to avoid New Earth, only stopping when she felt sick again, soon Kathryn was asleep feeling bad Chakotay picked her up and placed her in his bed while he slept on the couch.
=/\=
Kathryn woke up to find herself not in her own quarters. Putting last night's events together she realised she must be in Chakotay's quarters jumping from the bed she found he wasn't there but a PADD was.
Sorry I didn't wake you, I thought you'd want to sleep after being sick so much last night. I've modified the roster so I'll see you on the bridge at 1000. Enjoy your lie in. Chakotay.
Placing the PADD down she realised her next move would be to leave but because it was now 0900 so the ship would be in full swing of morning shifts approaching the door she looked out, empty, taking the chance she ran to over the hall and into her quarters. Kathryn regretted this decision as she felt her stomach flip and she had to run to the bathroom again. Lying on the floor she began to cry, had she contracted the disease again was she going to have leave her ship alone and find somewhere to stay for all eternity? Then it struck her, she ran from the bathroom threw on her uniform. Jogging down the corridor she ignored both Tom and Harry.
"Please state the nature of the…Captain, what's wrong?" she sat on the bio-bed and looked at the wall determined not to cry, cautiously he scanned her and found the root of the problem. She was nearly two months pregnant, she didn't understand how she could not have noticed. It was now 1000 and despite the orders to rest she went onto the bridge, she was as pale as a sheet but she would push on.
"Report" she demanded and received several answers making her excuses she walked to her ready room. Once there, she slumped on the small couch. "What the hell am I going to do? Captains don't get pregnant." Without realising it she began to cry again.
On the bridge Chakotay was staring at the ready room door. She was paler than this morning he wondered if she had been sick again.
"Chakotay, is the Captain alright, she was in quite a hurry this morning" Tom spoke after a while. With this he realised she was a lot more ill than last night. Quietly he got up and went to her ready room.
"Tuvok you have the bridge" with that he disappeared into her ready room. She was lying on the sofa muttering to herself, he couldn't hear what. "Kathryn" he spoke quietly walking up to her and was surprised that she jumped up and hugged him, gripping at his uniform she fisted it. "Oh dear god!" he heard her repeating, he didn't speak he just held her tightly to him.
"What's wrong?" he ventured once she sat up turning to him she gave a nervous smile
"I'm pregnant" his eyes grew, he didn't know what to say, so he held her hand as a silent promise to be beside her side.
"Oh Kathryn" he whispered.
=/\=
Author's note: Sudden ending but I do have a follow up piece planned but you'll have to wait for that.
Coming soon: Christmas runnier, a story in which Chakotay gets carried away and ruins Christmas, apparently.
Reviews always welcome
That-geek-in-a-hat©