Chapter Twenty Four – The Return

Jennifer Keller awoke with a start as something smashed to the ground next to her. Wearily she blinked her eyes open and scrunched her forehead, covering her eyes briefly with the palms of her hands, and let out a deep sigh.

She sat like that for a while, trying to sort herself out. It had been a few hectic days after they'd finally found Colonel Sheppard and his team. Major Lorne had done his best trying to keep order in a chaotic environment as the expedition was awaiting Colonel Carter's arrival, but non-existent information about John Sheppard and his team had constantly been the number one topic of conversation of among the staff. Everyone seemed a bit on the edge.

Jennifer hadn't been that long on Atlantis and she didn't really know what to expect. 'In Pegasus you have to expect the unexpected', Carson Beckett, her friend and mentor, had said once when he'd told her about a vacant position among his staff a few years ago, but she hadn't been ready for the big world then. Now, as she looked back upon what had happened in such a short time, she still wasn't sure that she was ready.

It was only a few months ago that Carson had approached her again to come and work with him, and after a bit of persuasion, she'd agreed to join the great adventure in the Pegasus galaxy. She'd embarked on the trip with a duffel bag swung over her shoulder containing a framed photo of her father and some other dear possessions amongst her clothes. She had been nervous, so nervous in fact that she'd felt a knot in her stomach, but Carson had promised to make her welcome and told her that she would like it in Atlantis.

Jennifer shook her head sadly at the memory and sighed in annoyance as she glanced down on the floor to see the glass of water she'd managed to send over the edge of her desk in her semi-awareness. The half full glass lay broken in pieces as the water gently seeped its' way over the floor.

She got up and out of her chair, heading for a cloth and swipes, but she wasn't really focused on the task at hand. Her mind was taking her back to when Carson had introduced her to his staff, showed her the way to the infirmary and then the rest of the magnificent city. She'd been fed stories and tales from various sources and departments which had welcomed her among the rest of the newly arrived personnel that day.

Then, on her third day in the city, while she was still getting to know the place, came the call about genetic mutations in some of the staff. She hadn't known about it then- if she had Carson would still have been alive. He'd refused to involve her, obviously thinking it was too soon for her to take care of such matters. Instead he'd sacrificed himself, taken Doctor Biro's shift as she'd retired with a headache.

Ironically Jennifer knew she was not the only one who blamed herself for her good friend's death; there were plenty, in fact. Rodney was devastated as he kept going on about that fishing trip he'd refused to go on with Carson. Both Major Lorne and Colonel Sheppard were mourning in their own stoic ways, too angry with themselves for not taking care of the matters instead of the doctor. Ronon didn't say anything but she knew he was devastated too, they all were. It soon became obvious to her that Carson Beckett had meant a lot to everyone on the entire base. No one had said anything then, but the horrible truth had no sooner revealed itself to her- she was to take command of the medical matters and become the CMO of Atlantis.

Jennifer chuckled without mirth to herself as she remembered how dumbstruck she'd appeared in front of Doctor Weir when it had been decided. She had protested, afraid of becoming a failure because she was after all quite young and, compared to everyone else on the expedition, inexperienced in Pegasus. Her lame protests had been in vain and her attempts at telling Doctor Weir that she was not ready for such a responsibility had been futile.

The young doctor gently knelt to pick up the glass as she thought back with utter and yet horrible fascination at the various cases Carson had discussed with her during their short period as working colleagues.

When she was finally able to picture herself in the role of CMO came the next blow to the expedition. The day Doctor Elizabeth Weir had been injured by the Asuran beam and brought down to the infirmary, everyone expecting her to perform a miracle. Out of desperation she'd approached Rodney and asked him to help her save Elizabeth's life with Nanite technology. She remembered the vivid argument that followed between John and Rodney and the order John had issued; that Elizabeth was not to be saved if that was the only way to do it.

At first she hadn't really understood how he could say such a thing, then when she watched Elizabeth being miraculously healed to the extent that even her hair had grown back, she had shuddered involuntarily. Jennifer would forever remember the look on Elizabeth's face when she told her about the nanites in her body. Perhaps she'd been naïve to think that the woman before her would be happy to be alive. The condemnation the diplomat had directed towards her and the security measures Sheppard had taken against Elizabeth at first had made the young doctor doubt her actions. Elizabeth Weir had walked out of her infirmary the day after her recovery and left Atlantis, never to return again. She had sacrificed herself on the Asuran planet to save the lives of Colonel Sheppard and Jennifer had never been able to tell her she was sorry or explained to Elizabeth why she'd insisted on using Nanite technology.

Jennifer sighed and swallowed, her mouth dry, as she swiped the floor clear of the water and started to pick up the shredded glass. "I won't lose Colonel Sheppard as well," she muttered under her breath.

"Jennifer?" A soft voice asked from the doorway, causing the doctor to jerk and cut her thumb on the glass.

"I'll help you with that," Teyla said as she bent down next to her and took the cloth from her.

Jennifer grimaced a little as she gently pressed on the small cut with her other thumb and index finger to make sure there was no glass embedded. "Thanks, I was brooding," she said sheepishly.

"You did well," The Athosian said kindly. "You cannot look back out here, you can only look forward. It is a way of survival."

Keller rocked on her heels looking thoughtful, almost regretful for a moment. "I don't know, Teyla, if I'm right for this job," she said truthfully.

"What made you come here?" Teyla asked curiously, despite the fact that she already knew the answer.

"Carson," Jennifer answered. "I let him persuade me, smooth talk me into coming here."

The Athosian nodded as she slowly got up and walked over to a bin and disposed of the glass. "Earth is a relatively safe place, I suppose, compared to the Pegasus galaxy. It's a special kind of life to be a part of this expedition but it gives a lot back," Teyla said with a smile. "You are needed here, Jennifer, wanted here. It will not be the same without you. And before you go on with what must be a negative train of thought, please think of yourself as an asset to this place and as a friend."

The young doctor couldn't help but smile at the genuine friendship Teyla was offering as she gently squeezed her shoulder.

The Athosian suddenly became serious, her face even looked troubled as she cast a glance over her shoulder. "I came here to see John. May I sit with him for a while?" She asked.

"Of course, Teyla. He's stable, still not out of the woods yet but he's improving with every minute. Just don't expect him to wake up anytime soon."

OOOOOO

John Sheppard awoke slowly from the medically induced sleep, several hours after Teyla had silently left the room, mentally cursing the cotton that seemed to coil itself around his cortex. He felt almost no pain- at least he couldn't point to a specific pain, everything was dulled.

Wearily his eyes trailed the IV line and the blood line up to the top of the pole and the half full bags hanging loosely from it. For a moment he found himself wondering if his eyes were playing tricks on him as they had so many times before, but this time he shook that thought away. He was no longer down in Askula. He couldn't be because the air was clean and crisp, mixed with a faint smell of antiseptics and the floors were clean, the beds opposite him fully functioning and occupied by scientists and a cook that he recognized.

John carefully turned his head slightly to his left and let out a deep breath, the last of his doubts leaving him lethargic as he stared at the beautiful arched window. Through the old painted glass he saw the faint glow of the moons and, as he strained his neck, craning it almost till it hurt, he could see the east pier and the vast ocean. A ghost of a smile creased his lips and an immediate sense of relief flooded him. He was finally home. Gingerly he eased back on the pillow and let sleep claim him once again.

When he opened his eyes the next time it was almost noon and the infirmary was bustling with activity. He slowly turned his head as he saw a woman sitting next to him in the visitor's chair wearing a thin smile.

"I leave for five minutes to see to business at home and you still manage to attract trouble," Samantha Carter said amusedly as she leaned slightly forward.

"It's not like I planned to end up here," Sheppard retorted, trying to sound more annoyed than he actually was.

"Actually, John, given the alternative I'm glad that you did," she said seriously. "Losing Carson Beckett and Elizabeth Weir has been a severe blow to the expedition but losing you too would be devastating."

"I won't accept that she's dead, Sam," he returned stubbornly. "There's no proof that she is."

"There's no proof that she's alive either," she replied softly. "I'm sorry, John."

He nodded thoughtfully knowing he would get nowhere with his reasoning, and at the moment he was tired, too tired to argue about anything so instead he said; "I'm glad you came. I have enough on my plate with the military side of this expedition. I never wanted to be the man with all the responsibility on my shoulders."

Silence settled over them for a moment as they looked at each other. Then Sheppard painfully raised his hand to his forehead in a salute. "I stand relieved, Colonel Carter," he said.

She returned the accustomed gesture before breaking into a smile. "I'm assuming responsibility, Colonel Sheppard," she replied and then reached out to gently squeeze his shoulder. "Get well soon, John."

He found himself nodding in return before drifting off to sleep once again.

OOOOOO

Chuck jumped slightly in the late evening as the silence that had settled at the end of the shift was rudely interrupted by a bad communication link from Askula.

"This is Doctor McKay calling Atlantis," he said through heavy static.

The gate technician quickly straightened in his chair and then let his hands fly over the controls to try and steady the signal. "I read you, Doctor McKay," he said curtly.

"Look, I-." Uncharacteristically the scientist trailed off for a moment.

Chuck frowned as he checked and rechecked the communications link.

"Say again, you're breaking up," the gate technician urged.

"How's Sheppard?" McKay finally asked.

"He's on the mend, Rodney," Samantha Carter filled in, surprising Chuck as she came up from behind him. She blinked at the technician and added for his ears only; "I was in the neighborhood."

"Carter?" They heard Rodney question in disbelief. "How long have you been there?"

"Just a few hours, Rodney," she admitted softly. "Like I said, Colonel Sheppard is on the mend. I've just had a short chat with him and a longer one with Doctor Keller."

There was audible relief coming from the link and the scientist's voice took on a much more confident, normal tone; one less worried. "What did she say?" he asked.

"That his recovery will take some time," Sam cautioned. "It's not like he's going to bounce back up from this. He'll need a lot of help and encouragement, team missions will be almost non-existent the next month. I figure he'll have time to catch up with his paperwork."

Rodney snorted. "He's going to love that. Me on the other hand it suits perfectly, that way I can take up some of the research projects I haven't had time with considering my hectic schedule. The Colonel can help me a lot by just being on the base," he said happily.

Samantha smirked, sharing a look with Chuck. "I'm sure he's going to love that too, Rodney," she let on.

"Good, then it's settled," Rodney replied. "Then there's the main reason I called, I mean except for Sheppard, of course. I need supplies and I need them fast. I'm running a diagnostic up here in the control room and while I do that, I thought I could see if I can get the interface to work with me and not against me."

"Tell me what you need and I'll see to it. Do you need Zelenka over there?" Sam asked, knowing that statement alone would rattle Rodney.

"I'm doing just fine without him," came the instant, somewhat testy reply. "It's enough with that ever smiling, annoying supposedly brilliant engineer that's running around the place, and then some."

Chuck shook his head in exasperation and at Carter's frown he added; "Rackie."

"I'll need a report by the morning, Rodney, you've had three days on site, so please get back here for a few hours for a debriefing," Sam said. "I've been talking to Teyla- have you seen Ronon back there somewhere? I didn't catch him here when he apparently came back to check on Sheppard."

"No, I haven't had the time to-" silence broke the link.

"Rodney? What's going on?"

"He's here," they heard him mumble. Then the Stargate suddenly lit up.

Chuck frowned. "Incoming wormhole from P3X- I mean Askula," he reported.

Carter nodded. "Open the gate," she ordered as she turned away from the console and walked up to the gangway overlooking the gate room.

The gate opened and shut down almost instantly, disposing a serious looking Ronon Dex. He glanced up at her, and Samantha Carter didn't scare easily, but the chilly look, the torn and dusty clothes, the blood smeared in various places and the gash on his forehead made him look like something from a zombie movie. He looked like the very determined soldier he'd probably been once, back on his home planet. It made the hair at the back of her neck rise as she turned away from him and headed downstairs.

"Colonel Carter," he acknowledged politely as she came to stand opposite him.

She nodded grimly. "Ronon, what's been going on?"

"The last fighting faction has been stopped. Turned out pretty ugly," he said succinctly, but when he looked at her a wicked smile carefully crept over his lips.

Samantha Carter nodded at the specialist, the rank he'd had a long time ago, silently wondering what kind of specialist he'd really been. He was relieved and amused as he stood there before her.

"I heard Military Organizer Jaha Katan has been taken care off," Carter said then added; "my compliments, however not the IOAs'."

His eyes twinkled at that. "I overheard Sheppard was on the mend," he said. "I'll head down to the infirmary before I head back to help out again."

"Take a break, Ronon. You deserve it. Lorne can take the supplies and aid the scientists. I'll assign a bunch of marines to go with the next batch of helping hands from the civilian department."

The Satedan looked to be considering it for a moment, then shook his head. "I'll go anyway, I like to feel useful."

OOOOOO

To be continued

/Finally, another chapter ;) Sorry for the delay. Thanks for the feedback on the previous chapter! I appreciate it. You're the best.