December 2013

It was the worst ice storm the city had seen in awhile, as well as Gabby. She hadn't seen snow in over a year, hadn't experienced the biting cold of a windchill of 45 below. It was all a mixture of the winter of the midwest and the Lake effect Chicago had, the cold winds blowing over the water and into the city. She was so not ready for it, didn't have good enough gear to get her from home to work without turning into an icicle.

"Hell of a storm," she told Shay as she walked in, blowing onto her hands and hoping feeling would return soon. The other woman nodded in agreement with a sound of disgust towards it. As she walked through the house, she could feel something in her bones - something wasn't quite right at 51, but she didn't know what. She did know that it was always a good idea to follow that feeling and not brush it off. When she got to her locker, she saw Herrmann and Mouch talking with Casey. Everyone got quiet when she walked in.

She looked at them, taking in the situation and their expressions. Matt's back was to her and she could see the scars from the blast before he pulled his shirt on. Turning around, he gave her a smile and a shoulder pat before walking out of the locker room. Herrmann and Mouch looked at her, at Casey, to each other, and then back to her. Herrmann shook his head, leading Mouch out of the room. That gut feeling had told her something was up, and now she knew it was.

When she made her way back to the common room, the chatter continued this time. She took her usual seat next to Shay, Kelly being at the Squad table today. She knew Shay was gay, but if she wasn't, she and Kelly would be perfect for each other. The friendship they had was stronger than any relationship Gabby had ever seen. It worked, they made it work. That was something she never had.

"Ambulance 61, Engine 51, Truck 81, Squad 3, Battalion 25. Structure Fire, Cermak and Kedzie," the automated voice said after the tones dropped. Everyone got up and rushed to their respective vehicles. Dawson pulled on her protective jacket and gloves, trying to make sure she'd stay warm because she had no idea how long she'd be outside today.

She wondered how a fire could burn in the winter, the battling of the extremes. Kind of like her and Casey, not really battling but rather a duel where neither wins. All that's left is pain and destruction, and that's why she had to walk away. That's why she had to hope he could understand the need for time, to defuse any leftover anger or resentment of what had happened.

When they rolled up to the scene, she could see the entire building wasn't engulfed. It looked to be a hardware store, which she knew would not end well. Both paramedics got ready for the worst, knowing there are many flammable items in a hardware store as well as accelerants and other materials that would aid the flames.

"Truck 81, vent. Squad 3, do a search," Boden told them. She assumed that because the building was smaller that they didn't need both Squad and Truck to do a search, putting her a little bit more at ease as they waited. She watched Cruz and Otis ascend the aerial to the roof, saw Casey waiting by Boden as Severide, Cap, and Tony all went inside the building. She turned to Shay, knowing that Kelly going in always made her nervous. A reassuring shoulder hug and hold helped Shay stay calm.

"We got propane in here, Chief," Severide said over the radio. "We're pulling out, getting to sketchy with the tanks." Shay tensed up a bit, waiting for them to leave the building. Less than a minute later, Severide and his men exited and a few seconds later the tanks blew.

"Didn't see anyone, but we couldn't go further than we did, Chief," Severide said to Boden. "Had to keep us safe." Boden nodded, a hand on his shoulder. Everyone knew that Kelly did what he had to, even if that meant during the secondary search they find a body.

"Let's go defensive," Boden told his men, hoses at the ready. She was surprised the water didn't freeze as soon as it came out of the hose, Gabby shivering as the wind picked up. "81, Squad, 61, go ahead back to the station." She didn't need to be told twice as she hopped in the ambo, trying to warm up by blasting the heat.

"You think you're going to survive this?" Shay asked with a laugh. She scowled at the other woman.

"A year in the desert definitely beats a day in this. I'd rather it be sweltering hot and being shot at than be in this weather," and she was serious. What she'd gone through wasn't a joke, but she'd trade the heat for this anyday. Shay chuckled. "Maybe a vacation, that would be nice."

"We'd all like a vay-cay," Shay responded with a longing sigh. "Beaches and hot chicks and all the drinking we can handle." Gabby laughed, turning to her friend. It was nice she could consider this woman, someone she'd met two months ago, as a friend. In those two months, they'd seen a lot together. They'd been through a lot together as partners and as friends. Shay had been there for her with her breakdown the previous month, Gabby had been there for Shay with one of the worst break-ups she'd ever seen - and that was saying something.

In those moments, Gabby wished she could have what she and Matt had back. She wanted to be able to talk to him, for him to hold her and comfort her on those bad days. She realized what she wanted, and then the impact happened. One second she was thinking about Casey, having a laugh with Shay. Then the next, the ambulance was being thrown through the intersection by a semi-truck running a red light.