Evening Falls

by Ava Sinclair

Elisa was once an everyday Twilight fangirl, but now, inexplicably, she's become a part of Edward and Bella's world. Her struggle to fit into her new life, however, may become a fight to survive that neither she nor Bella may win...

6. Dreaming

Despite how difficult Dreaming was to write, it's my longest chapter yet (thank Bella - she wouldn't shut up! :D ) and so I cut the final Elisa segment - it will go in the next chapter instead. Thanks again for all the wonderful reviews I've received so far. Please keep them coming - they really encourage me!

Oh, oh...almost forgot! I recently got the opportunity to beta for two great stories, Beyond The Sun by LadyNoreh and Island Moon by MrsMcoy. So for all of you who just can't get enough Jacob, check them out. Links to both on my favorite stories page.

Evening Falls

Chapter Six: Dreaming

Elisa:

Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something...

'Sweet Dreams', The Eurythmics

"Go over it again, Elisa, one last time. I just want to double check everything." Sitting next to me on the couch, Alice straightened up and took a deep breath, her eyes sharpening as she prepared to concentrate.

We were sitting on the large sofa in the living room, where we'd been for the last several minutes, consolidating our individual to do lists into one final check sheet with all the precision of a high stakes military operation. Across the room, Rosalie sat on her favorite perch, the window seat, occasionally watching us, other times just staring out the glass, her face unreadable. In the corner, Emmett and Jasper had been playing a noisy game of chess, but it seemed to be winding down.

Even as I thought this, Jasper abruptly stood up, saying something to Emmett that I couldn't hear, and then left the room without a backward glance. Alice watched him go, her face somber for a moment, before she turned back to me.

"OK, ready?" I picked up the final checklist and read the first item. "Bridesmaids' dresses."

"Don't need to check those - the final fitting went fine, and all of them are hanging in my closet. Next?"

"Caterer?"

Alice's face went blank and smooth for a moment, then she smiled. "The food will be here right on time, and just as we ordered. Go on."

"DJ? Live band? Flower girl? Rings? Ring bearer? Table settings? Limousine?"

After each one, I paused to give Alice time to look forward and check, and her response was positive and the same for each item until we got to the last.

"Flowers?"

Alice considered for a minute, then scowled. "I should have checked sooner. The shipment's been delayed - the florist waited too long to order the right flowers. They'll still get here, but late. Since we'll have to wait on Bella's bouquet, the ceremony's going to start off - " she thought again for a moment - "fourteen and a half minutes behind schedule. Stupid florist, and I won't even be able to demand a refund since I can't tell them where to send it to."

I nodded sympathetically. By now, all of Forks knew that the Cullens were leaving right after the ceremony, and I think if the entire town hadn't been so keyed up about the wedding itself they all would have gone into deepest mourning. I couldn't really blame them -small town life was certain to go right back to dead boring without the family of beautiful vampires and Bella Swan to give them something to gossip about. If I hadn't been leaving with them I might have been feeling the urge to wear mandatory black myself.

Of course we couldn't tell anyone where we were really going, hence Alice's frustration with the florist situation. Carlisle had told everyone that he had gotten an extremely prestigious job offer in New York, when the truth was we were moving to Canada. The less anyone knew about that, the better - especially the werewolves. Sam Uley had said they were turning a blind eye to the fact that Edward and Carlisle were planning on changing Bella after the wedding, but who knew if the fragile peace would really hold? It was a chance no one wanted to take.

And that was just one of the problems - the other was me. Supposedly, I was Carlisle's niece, the one he'd taken in after his estranged brother and wife had died in a car accident near Seattle. Luckily, Carlisle's reputation was spotless in Forks and he was so revered that this explanation seemed to have been accepted without question, but it would take only one skeptic, wondering how many orphaned nieces and nephews Carlisle and Esme could possibly have, and just a little digging for that all to fall apart. Not to mention that the werewolves also had issues with me being with the Cullens as well... It was best for everyone all around for us to leave as soon as possible.

Still, it was an odd feeling to know that in two days, I'd be saying goodbye to this small town forever, a town I'd barely seen for myself but still felt like I knew so well. I knew I wasn't the only one who would be sentimental about it. The Cullens may have just seen this little place as a means to an end when they moved here, but it was where Edward had found Bella, his soulmate, and I knew the memories meant a lot to all of them. And of course, it wouldn't be easy for Bella to leave either. She had to leave behind her friends, her father - and Jacob Black. Whether she would ever see any of them again...well, at this point, it was highly unlikely.

Unbeknownst to the townsfolk however, Bella and Edward wouldn't be leaving right away. In a twist on an old tradition, we were the ones who would be driving off after the reception. The newlyweds would stay behind, spend their first few days of married life alone here in this house, before heading to Canada to meet up with us. The stay alone here and the scenic drive would be their honeymoon. I felt a little sorry for them regarding that - honeymoons were meant to be spent in exotic faraway locations, but neither one of them seemed to mind. I guess when you have all of eternity to go wherever you want, things like that seem pretty inconsequential.

"Elisa," Alice's voice broke into my thoughts. She was looking towards the front door. "Edward and Bella are almost here."

I tensed immediately, and she gave me a reassuring smile. "Don't get nervous. Just remember what we talked about. Clear your mind, then concentrate, and don't expect this to work completely the first time out. It's going to take practice."

I nodded, but despite her words, I was nervous anyway. We had a surprise planned for the newlyweds, and in the interest of keeping it...well, surprising, I was going to try, for the first time, to block Edward from reading my mind. Not that I had a prayer of truly being successful, but with any luck I'd at least keep my mind busy enough to avoid spilling everything. Alice and Rosalie had assured me repeatedly that if I slipped it didn't really matter, because Edward would surely keep the secret from Bella, but it still irked me, the fact that my mind was such an open book to him. I had to find a way to maintain at least a little privacy or I was going to go insane.

We heard the front door open and Alice patted my head reassuringly. "Just relax, Elisa."

I meant to, I really did, but I was well aware that Edward would know immediately what I was trying to do and it was just making me more nervous. Plus, just being around him, although it was becoming easier all the time, was still incredibly distracting...no one should be allowed to look that good.

At this thought, I blushed, but I refused to allow myself to dwell on my embarrassment. Edward had already heard my most private and humiliating fantasies about him, and he'd taken them all in stride, to my eternal gratitude. I guess my thoughts were probably fairly tame compared to what he'd heard over the past nine decades or so. Plus, it was easy enough to figure out that the more I tried not think something, the more I would, so generally I just let any potentially embarrassing thoughts come and go as they may without making a big deal over them.

Now, though, I needed to concentrate. I'd spent hours yesterday in the library, trying to find just the right piece of writing to memorize, something could both hold my interest but complicated enough that I'd really have to think to remember it all. I worked hard now to clear my mind and then began to recite the carefully memorized lines in my head.

You and me--we know that land
And often have been there
In the long old days, old nursery days,
A dark child and a fair...

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward look up from where he and Bella had been talking to Emmett. His eyes slid over to me. I tried to ignore him and keep concentrating.

Was it down the path of - of -

His lips were quirking now, and I was rapidly losing my train of thought. What came next? I desperately tried to remember the next line, but when I heard him snicker, my rising irritation swept the rest of the poem away and I turned to glare at him. It was easy for him to laugh...thanks to their vampirically enhanced memorization skills, Alice and the others knew endless amounts of obscure literature and could recite them in about twenty different languages if they wanted him to stay out of their thoughts, but I was human and I didn't have all their advantages. It was totally unfair for him to mock me.

I chewed my lip for a moment as I thought it over, and then grinned. Why had I been making this so difficult on myself? Screw poetry - why hadn't I realized that I had a nearly never-ending supply of meaningless pop culture with which to torment him? I knew exactly what to think to block him out - and hopefully annoy the heck out of him at the same time. Hello to small, petty vengeance...oh yes, you shall be mine.

I saw Edward raise an eyebrow at me, but before he could dig further I began to think as loudly as I could, running through the lyrics of the most inane pop songs and boy band anthems that sprang to mind.

I grinned as I saw Edward flinch slightly, then reach up to rub his forehead, sending a hard stare my way. Bella gave him a confused look, then followed his gaze to me, and realization dawned on her face.

"Elisa, what are you doing to Edward?" Bella folded her arms and stared at me, looking torn between amusement and concern.

"Nothing..." I said innocently. "..that he doesn't totally deserve." I added under my breath with another grin.

Edward gave me another dirty look, then suddenly his face smoothed out and a mischievous light shown in his eyes. Uh oh.

He turned away from me as if he'd forgotten my presence and spoke to the room in general. "Good news, everyone! Did I tell you all that I got a call from the auto bodyshop in Port Angeles? The Volvo is back in one piece. Bella and I are going to head over there now and pick it up."

I groaned silently as all eyes suddenly turned to me, amusement dawning on their faces. Dammit. I should have known he'd fight back.

"The Volvo?" Emmett said brightly. "Let's see if I remember this correctly...oh yes, isn't that the very same car that you had to take in for repairs after a certain somebody hit the gas instead of the brake and backed it into a tree? Twice?"

"Ha ha, Emmett." I said sourly. Like I hadn't already heard that one about eight hundred times. "Are you guys ever going to let me forget about that?"

Alice chuckled "Probably not. You have to admit that your driving lessons were chockful of occasions to laugh and point. In all my years, I don't think I've ever seen a less coordinated driver." She laughed. "Behind the wheel, you make Bella look like the epitome of grace and lightning reflexes."

"Hey!" Bella's voice was indignant..

"Oh, don't feel bad, Elisa. There's nothing with being a loyal rider of mass transit. In fact, it's positively considerate of you, especially when you think that not only will you be helping to maintain a less polluted world, but you'll be sparing the lives of possibly hundreds of innocent pedestrians and fellow drivers by staying off of the streets." Edward was smirking now.

"Edward!" I snapped. "Come on, I'm only fifteen! I have time to get better!"

Edward shrugged. "I suppose you could improve..." he mused. "But I think I'll still get you a lifetime bus pass for your sixteenth birthday, just in case."

I folded my arms and scowled at him which just made everyone laugh harder. I gritted my teeth in frustration, but witty comebacks were not forthcoming, especially since deep down I had to admit he was probably right. Our driving lessons had been a complete and utter disaster. I don't know what happened to me every time I got behind the wheel, but it seemed like my fingers turned to jelly and I gained a complete inability to remember left from right or which pedal was the gas and which was the brake. Throw in my tendency to panic whenever we got to a light, or I had to turn, or even when other cars passed me and we pretty much had a recipe for massive amounts of roadkill on our hands.

Yep, he'd successfully managed to turn the tables on me. It looked like this time around, small, petty vengeance was his. Unless... I thought about it and an evil smile lit my face. I had discovered in recent weeks that there was one tiny little topic of conversation that completely unnerved the normally unflappable Edward Cullen, one that was so obviously uncomfortable for him that it was surprisingly easy to imagine him as the blushing schoolboy he pretended to be. Before, I had never been low enough to use this knowledge against him, but desperate times called for desperate measures...

Edward had stiffened again and he looked at me now. 'You wouldn't.' he mouthed the words to me.

'I so totally would!' I thought back, still smiling in his direction.

"Bella, let's go." he said hastily, taking her arm and moving towards the door.

I allowed the sound of 80's synthesizers fill my mind as the song I'd picked just for him began to play in my head.

I made it through the wilderness...somehow I made it through...

He redoubled his efforts to get out the door but Bella pulled away from him.

"Wait, Edward! I have to ask Elisa something!" Edward groaned softly as Bella turned back towards me.

"Yes, Bella?" I asked sweetly, still keeping the thoughts flowing behind my words.

Didn't know how lost I was until I found you...I was beat, incomplete, I'd been had, I was sad and blue...

"I was wondering if you'd do me a favor." Bella was speaking directly to me now, and I was surprised enough to let my mental warfare drop...for now. She'd never asked me for a favor before.

"Sure. What is it?"

Bella smiled more widely. "Well, it seems I might need some company tomorrow night, since a certain somebody - " she shot a dark look at Alice " - says it's bad luck for Edward to stay with me before the wedding. So would you like to spend the night at my house, keep me from biting my fingernails off and pulling my hair out like I would if I'm left alone?"

"Really?" I was beyond pleased. I'd never seen Bella's house although I had met her father a few times when he'd come by the house for the extra tuxedo fittings that Alice had insisted on, or just to drop Bella off. In fact I had gotten to spend much time with Bella at all, and this would probably be just about my last chance to hang out with her for a long, long time. "I'd love to spend the night at your house! But are you sure you wouldn't rather have Alice there?" I chewed my lip doubtfully as I thought about it.

"I'll be busy making sure nothing goes wrong at the last minute." Alice grinned at us. "You must admit, Bella, there's a lot of benefits to having a wedding planner that doesn't need to sleep."

"Wonderful. That's settled then." Edward's voice was hurried. "We'll work out the details later. Bella, let's go before the shop closes."

Bella looked a little startled at his impatience but she allowed him to drag her hurriedly towards the door.

"Drive carefully, you two!" I called after them cheerfully. Inside my head, the synthesizers started again.

But you made me feel...yeah, you made me feel...shiny and new...

"Thanks!" Bella called back.

"Oh, and Edward..." I smiled sweetly as my voice trailed off.

He would have ignored me, but Bella tugged at his sleeve. "Edward, Elisa's trying to tell you something."

Edward turned back to me, his expression resigned, and I turned up the volume on my inner voice as loud as it would go.

...like a VIRGIN...touched for the very first time...like a vi-ur-ur-ur-gin...

With a short growl, Edward grabbed Bella, ignoring her startled exclamation as he nearly ran with her towards the door and half a second later they were gone, leaving me giggling in their wake.

"What was that all about?" Rosalie asked as she rose gracefully from her seat to walk over to my side.

"Nothing...much." I was still giggling. "It's just fun to be able to make Edward nervous for once instead of the other way around." Then I looked at Alice. "Are they really gone?" I demanded.

Alice nodded, standing.

"OK then, come on you two, let's get to work! We have so much to do before tomorrow!" I was practically hopping up and down with impatience. Turning, I grabbed Rosalie's hand, ignoring her startled expression. "You're still going to help, right?"

"Yes, Impatient One, let's go upstairs and finish our project." Alice rolled her eyes at Rosalie and they both chuckled softly.

"Just one moment, Elisa." Suddenly Carlisle was there before us. "Before you do that, there's something I else I need you to do." he smiled down at me. "In the interest of forging accurate transcripts for your new school, I need you to take some academic placement tests so we can make sure you end up in the right classes."

"What?" I groaned. "Tests? Why? I can totally tell you where I am. Advanced English, Remedial Math. It's the story of my life."

Carlisle chuckled. "This shouldn't take you long. The tests are on my desk in the study...if you take them in there you won't be disturbed."

"Fine." I sighed heavily and looked at Alice and Rosalie. "Don't do everything without me, OK?"

"We promise we'll save you plenty of work." Alice soothed me, though her eyes were twinkling at my downcast expression.

Reluctantly, I shuffled up the stairs, knowing I should move faster and get it over with but I just couldn't make myself. Homework during vacation time...it was just too cruel. Not that it was anything new to me though...last school year I'd failed math rather spectacularly and spent the summer taking make up classes. I sighed at the memory. I was so going to be the stupid Cullen - I just knew it.

I reached the second floor landing and headed into Carlisle's study. Just inside the doorway, I froze.

Jasper was standing before me, apparently having just risen from the lounge behind him, a thick book in his hand. I saw my surprise reflected in his golden eyes, and I tensed. I still wasn't fully comfortable being around him yet. Scratch that - to be honest, despite his relaxing abilities, I wasn't comfortable being around Jasper at all. During the nearly two months I'd been living there, he was most definitely the family member I'd spent the least amount of time with, and I was more than aware that it was deliberate on his part. Even a total moron would not have been able to mistake the tension that radiated off of him whenever I was near, or miss the fact that he made excuses to leave the room whenever I entered.

He didn't want me there. This was a realization I knew wasn't stemming from my insecurities...it was absolutely true. Why he had voted for me to stay when he had a choice I did not know, but it was clear to me that he regretted it. I sighed, thinking about it. I missed the quiet humor he'd shown that day in the forest when I'd first met him, the easy camaraderie he'd had with his brothers. It seemed like that Jasper had been swallowed whole by this dark, moody creature who never spoke, just sat in corners and stared at me like I was some unwelcome alien that had fallen from their spaceship and landed on his doorstep.

After a moment of awkward silence I looked away from him and towards Carlisle's desk, where I could see a few blue booklets lying on its glossy surface.

"Sorry to bug you." I mumbled as I edged past him. "I just came to get my placement tests." I would take them downstairs and do them in the kitchen. Anything to get away from him as fast as possible.

I had picked up the booklets and was on my way back to the door when his voice broke the quiet.

"I make you nervous." It wasn't a question.

I turned back to him slowly and nodded. "Yes." There was no point in lying.

He watched me for several more endless seconds, and then, to my surprise, he smiled. "You make me nervous too." he admitted.

"Me? Why?" Startled, my voice rose a bit.

He looked at me steadily. "I think that would be fairly obvious, Elisa. I don't understand you."

"What's to understand?" I asked, my voice sharper now.

"Well, there's your choices, first of all." Jasper continued to pierce me with his fixed stare. "Do you truly understand what you're doing, Elisa? What you are risking by being here?"

I took a deep breath and forced myself to look him in the face. "I think I made that clear before, Jasper. I may not be the smartest person in the world, but I'm not a total idiot either. I know exactly what I'm risking."

"You still have other options, Elisa. Why do you stay?" Jasper looked at me even harder now.

I couldn't speak for a moment as my throat tightened convulsively. At his words, the pain that was always under the surface boiled over. The thought of losing another family - of being cast off - it was my worst fear, the one I didn't dare to take out and examine too often because I knew I couldn't bear it. It was the one thing that would collapse me when nothing else had.

I was trying to find words - far less personal ones - to explain to him when he spoke again.

"I see." His face was gentler now, but despite that I felt a surge of resentment. Between Edward reading my mind, and him reading my emotions, would I ever have any privacy again?

"You're angry at me now." Once again it wasn't a question.

I sighed heavily, ignoring his last statement. "You said that was one of the things that made you nervous. What else?"

Jasper frowned. "There's the fact that we still don't know why you're here. The others have apparently accepted that it is a mystery we'll never understand, but it's harder for me. I suppose that's because of my background...I was trained not to blindly accept situations, but to understand and control them. This is completely out of my hands. It bothers me, and the fact that it doesn't seem to bother anyone else... I just don't like it."

I nodded slowly, thinking about what he had just said, reading between the lines. "It's more than that. Even if I was just some normal girl off the street, you wouldn't like that your family took me in so willingly. Bella, you tried to accept. You loved her for Edward's sake before you loved her for her. Me...I'm not that vital to anyone you care about. You don't understand why they would take so many risks for me. " I shrugged. "I suppose that's fair." I had to admit to myself that I didn't always understand it either.

"Perceptive." Jasper was giving me another strange look.

I snorted. "Not really...I'm just not an idiot, like I said."

"Hmmm. Well, I must admit I'm surprised at your reaction. I thought you'd be a bit more upset with me, not so - mature about it, I suppose."

"I'm surprised by your surprise." I was starting to get a bit angry now at his condescending tone . "I guess I don't understand why you'd assume how I'd react to anything, considering the fact that you know jack about me." I started towards the doorway once more, then looked back. He was still giving me that perplexed look, and it was really getting on my nerves. He was making me feel like a total freak.

"You know what the best thing is about human teenagers, Jasper?" I crossed my arms.

He raised an eyebrow at me. "What's that?"

"We grow up. We leave home. And generally, at some point, we die. So don't worry - I won't be around to bother you forever." Turning, I stomped towards the door. "I hope that makes you feel better." With that, I flounced out the doorway, banging the door shut behind me a bit harder than necessary.

I regretted my overly dramatic exit almost instantly as I headed down the stairs and towards the kitchen. So much for maturity. He had every right to feel that way about me but I couldn't help the fact that it had seriously hurt my feelings. For a moment, I let the tears well in my eyes, but then, angrily, I shook them off. I didn't have time to feel sorry for myself - there was far too much to do.

I was almost finished with the final test booklet when Carlisle appeared beside me. I was finally getting used to their abrupt appearances, and his sudden presence barely even rattled me.

He was silent, picking up the first booklet and scanning my answers. As soon as I finished the final questions for the one I was working on, he held out his hand for that too. I gave it to him and watched in silence for a few minutes as he looked it over.

"So how did I do?" I asked when he set them down.

Carlisle smiled. "Advanced English, Remedial Math."

I grinned. "Told you."

He chuckled again. "We'll just see what we can do about the remedial part. I plan to oversee your education very carefully. If I have anything to say about it, you'll be well caught up before the end of the next school year.."

I snorted. "Many have tried, none have succeeded. Do you know how many math teachers and tutors I've driven to the point of breaking down? My eighth grade math teacher said I was 'utterly unteachable'. That's just mean! It's not my fault math had to get all complicated. I was doing just fine until the seventh grade, and then all the sudden they want us to figure out these problems that have letters instead of numbers and it all went to hell. Oh and last year, my teacher, Mr. -"

I stopped, mid-babble. There it was again, the emptiness where my memories should be, the blackness that was waiting to take it all away from me. I clenched my fists convulsively for a moment, then forced myself to relax, painting on a weak smile. "Um, sorry...I talk too much. Never mind.".

Carlisle wasn't fooled. "You can't remember his name, can you? Your math teacher?"

I stared at the floor for a moment before I could trust my voice to remain steady. "No."

"You can't hold onto everything, Elisa." His voice was gentle now, sad for me.

"I know I can't. I'm holding on to what's important - that's all that matters now." For a vivid moment, I let my family's faces flash before my eyes, then I jumped off the stool. "So are we done with the school stuff?"

"Elisa - " Carlisle started again, his voice serious.

I knew he was just trying to help, but I couldn't stand to hear it one more time, how sorry he was, how I needed to let go, how my life was here now. As much as most of them may not realize it, I was making my peace with that. Choosing not to let go of my family didn't mean that I wasn't going to live every minute of my new life. It had been given to me for reasons I would never understand, but that didn't mean I was going to let it go to waste.

I cut Carlisle off as if I hadn't heard him, knowing he wouldn't be deceived but hoping he would play along anyway. "Hey, do you want to come upstairs with me, see what we're planning for Bella and Edward?" I waited expectantly.

Carlisle surveyed me carefully for another long second, then nodded. "Sure. I'd love to see what you all are up to."

"It's going to be great." I told him as he followed me out of the kitchen. "Not just this, but the whole day. Every single little bit of it will be absolutely perfect, just like Bella and Edward deserve. Nothing is going to mess it up." My voice was determined.

Carlisle gave me a sideways look, and for some reason he looked mildly worried again. "Nothing is ever perfect, Elisa."

"This will be." I gritted my teeth. Why did everyone insist on raining on my parade or acting like I was taking this too seriously? I sighed as my thoughts grew more resentful. Maybe I really was expecting too much. It wasn't even my wedding and I was obsessing over it like the most psychotic of Bridezillas. But didn't anyone else realize how important it was that this one glorious day went off without a hitch? Couldn't there just be one occasion that didn't get wrecked in some small way, one perfect, unblemished dream that could actually come true?

Was that really too much to ask for?

Bella:

I've got my feet on the ground

and I don't go to sleep to dream

you've got your head in the clouds

and you're not at all what you seem...

'Sleep to Dream', Fiona Apple

"Was it really that terrible?"

Edward's voice was so soft, so intense, so utterly and completely melting, that even if I'd just finished crushing my own fingers with a hammer my response still would have been the same.

"No. It wasn't terrible at all." I leaned closer to him, getting lost in his eyes, not thinking at all now about the wedding rehearsal I'd just stumbled through - literally. I had tripped a grand total of three times going down the 'aisle', the third time so violently that I'd almost taken Charlie down with me. I winced at the memory and prayed silently that the same concept that applied to Broadway shows would also apply to our wedding: bad rehearsal equals great show.

"I personally didn't think it was so bad either. Although I truly hope that tomorrow you make the effort to look at me instead of at your feet as you're coming towards me." Edward chuckled softly, and I blushed. He was right - I had barely glanced at him all through the short rehearsal. I'd been so busy concentrating on not doing anything to embarrass myself; not that it had helped.

"Sorry." I whispered. "Tomorrow I won't look anywhere but at you, even if it means that I fall twice as often. I promise."

Edward's eyes smoldered into mine now, and I couldn't help but smile. He'd been nearly incandescent with happiness all night, and I felt low and mean-spirited now. How could I be so miserable when he'd waited so very long for this day? I should have felt relieved to have such a major hurdle behind me, but as I thought about what I'd just endured, I tensed all over again. The whole ordeal had been even worse than I'd anticipated and tomorrow, it was going to be worse - so much worse. How could I stand it?

Unconsciously, I leaned towards him, remembering my main source of comfort, that all this was so we could be together forever. The barrier between us brought me back to reality, making me scowl as it impeded my progress towards him.

"Careful, love. I don't need you falling out of the window and breaking something - again." Edward reached out a hand to steady me and reluctantly, I pulled back a bit, settling myself safely back behind the sill.

We were in my bedroom - well, I should say that technically, I was in my bedroom. Edward was in the tree outside, weighing down an outstretched branch with his lithe figure so that it extended to just inches from the sill. As Romeo and Juliet as this little scene seemed, I would have much rather him been in my room with me but it was the night before our wedding and apparently 'bad luck' for the groom to spend it with his bride. Stupid human superstitions, I grumbled to myself. It was just my luck that Alice took them so seriously.

I had hoped that Elisa, being the hopeless romantic that she was, might be a little more flexible and perhaps cover for us if we decided to break the rules, but even she had turned out to be an utter disappointment in that department. She had been sympathetic, but completely firm in her refusal when I'd begged her earlier tonight at the wedding rehearsal. "You two have had enough bad luck for twenty lifetimes, Bella." Elisa had snorted, unmoved by my attempt to blink tears into my eyes. "Don't you think it's best not to take any more chances?"

I had to admit, that one was hard to argue with. So I was resigned to saying goodnight to Edward in a few minutes, knowing it was silly to be so frustrated by it when after tomorrow, there would be no reason for us to ever be apart again. At least I wouldn't be home alone with just Charlie for company, endlessly replaying everything that could possibly go wrong on the big-screen of my mind over and over.

"What are you thinking about?" Edward leaned forward, using his elbows to prop himself up on the window sill as he gazed at me. "You look a little perturbed."

I opened my mouth to tell him everything was fine, but before I could, his eyes clouded. "It's your mother, isn't it? You're upset that she didn't change her mind." He sighed now. "I must admit, I really did expect her to come around. I'm so sorry that she won't be here tomorrow."

I hadn't been thinking about Renee, but now that he mentioned her, my stomach plummented. Edward wasn't the only one who'd expected Renee to come around. I thought back to our most recent day in the meadow, just over three weeks ago, the day that Edward had finally asked me, whole-heartedly, to become immortal, to spend eternity with him. It had been a monumental turn-around for him, and such a relief to me, that it had made me feel like nothing was impossible, no barrier too high to climb over, nothing I couldn't do.

With that attitude, I had gone home that night determined to get through to my mother, no matter what it took. The minute I'd walked in the front door I'd nearly run upstairs to my room, and went straight to the phone beside my bed. I dialed Mom's number over and over, getting nothing but her falsely cheerful, machine amplified voice, informing me that no one was home and I should leave a message. I knew she was screening her calls, but at some point I was sure she'd break down and answer, if only to keep Phil from complaining about the constantly ringing phone.

An hour later, I was beginning to think that I had seriously underestimated her. Being away from her for so long had softened her stubbornness in my memory, fooling me into thinking that perhaps her views on young marriage had softened. Clearly, I'd been living in a fool's paradise. Still, I had to keep trying.

I dialed her number again, ignoring the fact that my index finger was beginning to throb, and mouthed along to the familiar greeting when it clicked on. This time, I didn't hang up right away. The beep sounded in my ear and I took a deep breath, then spoke. "Mom?" I crossed my fingers that she still had our answering machine and hadn't switched to voicemail. If she could just hear my voice, maybe it would spark something in her. "Mom, I know you're there. Please pick up." I waited for a moment. No response. "Fine, Mom, be that way. I'm stubborn too, you know. I can keep this up all night. In fact, I can keep this up for days."

I was just about to hang up and re-dial when there was a sudden click and then her voice sounded in my ear. I was so relieved that the tight, angry tone in it barely registered.

"Bella?"

"Mom!" My eyes welled with happy tears. "I am so happy that - "

"Are you still getting married in three weeks, Bella?" Her voice was cool as she cut me off. "Or have you finally come to your senses?"

"Mom!" My eyes began to fill with tears for a different reason now. "Yes, I am still getting married, but I wanted to - "

"Then we have nothing to say to each other." I could tell she was getting ready to hang up.

"Wait!" My voice was panicky. "Mom, please, can we just - "

"No." Her voice was cold, flat. "Bella, I don't know how I can say this more clearly. You are making an enormous mistake marrying Edward this young. Get engaged if you want to, but at least finish college before you walk down the aisle. That would be the right thing to do, the smart thing, and I'm sure you know this! Why won't you listen to me?"

I started to protest, but she cut me off once more.

"Are you pregnant, Bella? Is that what this is about?"

"Mom!" I was fuming now. She'd already asked me this at least six times. "You know I'm not!"

"Then tell me why, Bella. Just give me one good reason."

Um...because I want to be a vampire before I look old enough to be Edward's mother? Because he's a hundred and eight and tired of waiting? Because he's too moral to let me take advantage of him before I put a ring on his finger?

I imagined her reaction if I said any of these things to her and had to press my lips together to keep in the hysterical bit of laughter that threatened to explode from my lips.

"Because...we love each other, Mom. Because we want to." Lame, lame, lame. I knew how weak that sounded even before her heavy sigh came down the receiver.

"And you don't think you'll love each other four years from now?" Renee's voice was exasperated. "If you aren't committed to each other enough to even make it through a long engagement, how do you think you're going to do at marriage? Bella, this isn't like you! Please, just listen to what I am saying. I know that I haven't always set the best example for you, but this is one situation where I know what I'm talking about. You may have the best intentions, plans to go to school and have your future the same as you ever did, but if you marry now you're going to be pregnant within the year, and everything you've worked so hard for will go out the window. You'll be stuck at home watching life pass you by, and when the fairytale fades and real life sets in, you'll regret it. You have so much potential, Bella. I want more than that for you."

"Mom, everything I want, everything that I need...he's it. He is my future. I don't want anything else." My voice was shaky now.

"Oh, that makes a lot of sense!" Renee's voice was angry now. "And what happens if it doesn't work out, Bella? If he wakes up one day and realizes that he's lost his chance to be young and free? If he leaves again? Are you going to fall apart? Will you just lie down and die, because you've built your life around him and he left you with nothing? Is this how your story will end?"

Her words pierced my heart, causing me more hurt than she could have imagined. I couldn't speak now, but my low sobs must have registered through the phone, because her voice softened.

"I don't want to hurt you, Bella. And it's not as if I don't like Edward. Did he tell you that he's been calling me too?"

"What?" I choked out, although I really shouldn't have been surprised. For a moment, I felt a pinprick of irritation that he'd tried to intervene, but it was quickly washed away by gratitude. He knew what having Renee's support would mean to me.

"Yes, and I told him the same thing I'm telling you. I am not against you two getting married. All I'm saying is not now. Just wait a few years. It's not so much to ask. Please, Bella!"

"Mom, I understand what you're saying, I really do, but we are getting married now. Everything is set, and there is nothing that you, or anyone, can say to change my mind. Please be there. Even if you're not happy about it. For me, Mom."

There was a long silence, and when she finally spoke again, I heard the tears behind her voice. "I'm sorry, Bella, but I can't. I won't stand by and watch you wreck the future that we both worked so hard to make sure you'll have. If you come to your senses, call me. Until then - don't bother."

There was a click, and then a dial tone.

For the next couple of minutes, I had just sat there, holding the phone in my hands, listening to the dial tone as the tears trickled down my face. Then I took a deep breath, hung it up, and got to my feet. I couldn't give up. Not yet. The exhilaration of the last few hours with Edward, the decisions we had made together, was still fresh in my mind, giving me strength. Hurriedly, I went downstairs, getting an old, barely used spiral bound notebook out of a kitchen drawer and a pen as well. Then I went to the dining room table and sat down.

It took me several minutes to figure out what to write, but when I got started it seemed like I couldn't stop. I couldn't tell her the truth behind my decision - not the whole truth anyway, but there was still so much that I hadn't been able to put into words before. So many more reasons behind my decision then I'd ever been able to express, and I poured it all down on paper now. How I felt about Edward, how it had been between us from the moment I'd first laid eyes on him, how I knew he felt about me in return. All the reasons - and there were so many - why we were different, why I knew, beyond all rationale, that it would be forever, why it had to be.

Once I was done, I put it in an envelope, stamped and addressed it, and before I could lose my courage, I drove it to the post office to put it in the after hours mail slot. I knew if I took the time to think about it, I'd realize how incredibly vulnerable I'd just made myself, and I would tear it up before it ever got to her. I'd never worn my heart on my sleeve so blatantly before. It just had to make a difference.

I sighed now as I returned to the present day, looking up to see Edward's concerned face still peering down at me. I had never told him about the letter, but I had been so sure that it would get through to her. Every time the phone rang over the past few weeks I'd run to it, expecting to hear her voice. I'd been doomed to near constant disappointment. Finally, I had to resign myself. She wasn't going to come around. Renee would never support my marriage to Edward. It hurt so much to know that she would rather cut herself out of my life then accept my decision, but I had to make my peace with it now. At least I had the comfort of knowing I'd tried everything I could.

"It's alright, Edward." I whispered now. "I'm not going to pretend that I'm not sad about Renee, but there's nothing else either one of us can do. I tried, and I know you did too. Thank you." I looked at him, smiling now at the surprise in his eyes. I leaned forward to brush my lips against his, but pulled back as a light thud registered in my ears.

I looked over my shoulder at Elisa. She was kneeling on the floor on the other side of the room, her back deliberately to us, as she dug through the box of my carefully packed book collection. She'd been at it for the past twenty minutes, and I was beginning to seriously doubt she found my Jane Austen novels that riveting.

"I shouldn't forget that I have a guest." I whispered to Edward. "I suppose I should say goodnight." The reluctance in my tone was blatant.

"But not goodbye." Edward murmured back. "Not ever again."

"Never." I agreed as our faces neared, and then our lips touched. I couldn't resist pulling him closer, regardless of his precarious position, and for a moment I was completely lost in the feel of his mouth on mine, until I realized that the sound of my books being shuffled had become much louder and more deliberate. Edward and I chuckled at the same time, parting slowly.

"Goodnight then." I whispered.

"Until tomorrow." Edward stroked my face with his cool hand and I shivered, not from the chill, but from the electricity that raced down my spine at his touch. "You know where I'll be waiting for you at." His whisper was just for me now, his lips nearly touching my ear, and I almost lost it right there, wanting so much to give in to the desire to yank him through the window and make him stay. I took a deep breath and forced my raging hormones to settle down. Only one more night to endure, and then he could have me the way he wanted me, as his wife, and I could have him the way I wanted him, as my everything.

"Good night, Elisa. Take care of my Bella, will you?" Edward called out in a normal tone now, and Elisa turned to face us, her face deeply amused.

"Oh Edward..." she gasped dramatically. "Parting is such sweet sorrow!" Apparently the Romeo and Juliet ambience had not been lost on her either.

"Brat." Edward rolled his eyes, but his voice was humorous. With one final, intense smile at me, he pulled back and was gone. For a moment I remained at the window, feeling suddenly hollow, and then, with an enormous effort, I turned back to Elisa.

"Did you find anything you liked in there?" I asked, gesturing towards the box of books.

Elisa rolled her eyes. "Not even. I like to read, but your book collection is so not my style." She made loud snoring noises. "It's like an ode to English Lit's required reading list. You don't even have any Harry Potter!" Elisa walked around my bed to look out the window at the darkening sky, and then turned back to face me. "You remind me of another friend I used to have. Neither one of you ever seem to have a shallow moment."

I rolled my eyes at her. "Oh, please. I can be entirely shallow."

"Oh yeah?" Elisa raised her eyebrows. "Prove it."

"How?" I played along.

"Well..." Elisa thought for a moment, then looked towards my already packed suitcase and snickered. "I've seen your wardrobe so we can skip the fashion test. You'd have failed miserably anyway. OK, here we go. Name one character from Gossip Girl."

"Who's gossip girl?" I asked, puzzled.

Elisa snorted. "Never mind. OK, how about Degrassi: The Next Generation? No? The O.C.? Laguna Beach? Beverly Hills, 90210? Bella, do you even know how to turn on a television?" Her voice was exasperated. "OK, if you just know who Perez Hilton is, I'll give you a pass on all that. In fact, if you know who Paris Hilton is, I'll give you a pass on everything!"

She waited for a moment, and then giggled as I stared at her blankly. "See, what did I tell you? You're completely abnormal. I'll bet you've never even had a celebrity crush."

"I have too!" I protested.

Elisa put her hands on her hips. "Really? Who?" she challenged.

"Romeo." I said immediately, still lost in my Shakespearean flashbacks. "Does that count?"

"Unless you want to add 'as played by Leonardo DiCaprio', then I'm going to have to say no. Anyone else?"

"Brad Pitt!" I blurted out, saying the first name that popped into my mind, knowing that it was pointless. She was right - I wasn't normal. I mean, at some point I must have daydreamed over movie stars or rock singers, but my life before Edward seemed so far away, so utterly without meaning, that I couldn't remember. And besides, who needed fantasies when I had him, my wildest dream come true, at my side every day for the rest of eternity?

Elisa looked like she doubted the sincerity of my Brad Pitt crush as well, but she considered for a moment and then finally nodded. "OK, I'll accept that. You are now .001 percent shallow. Satisfied?"

"Ecstatic." I said dryly. Elisa laughed again and I couldn't help but smile along with her. I knew it was a good idea to invite her to spend the last night of my single life with me. She was just as distracting - more so - then I'd hoped. It was nice to see her smiling and laughing again. Still, teasing like this called for some kind of retaliation, and I found it in the form of the pillow that I sneakily - or so I thought - lobbed at her head.

Of course Elisa managed to duck at precisely the right moment, and we both watched as my pillow went sailing out my open window and disappeared.

"Oops!" Giggling, we both ran to the window and looked down to see it lying on the grass below. I sighed. "I'd better go get it before it gets damp. I don't want to be smelling like mildew when I wake up tomorrow."

"I'll come with you." Elisa said immediately, following me to the door.

"You don't need to, Elisa. I'll be right back. Why don't you change into your pajamas?"

Elisa snorted loudly and continued walking with me. "Oh,right! Don't you ever watch movies either, Bella? Let me set the scene for you. The lovely, disaster prone bride is home the night before her wedding. A seemingly harmless coincidence prompts her to go outside, in the dark by herself and next thing you know...oh, come on, you have to see that this just has 'tragic scenario' written all over it . If I let you go alone, who knows what could happen to you? And how would I explain it to Edward?"

I shook my head at her as I pushed open the back door and we walked onto the gloomy lawn. "Is that so? And what would you do if you were right? Let's say there's a pack of escaped murderers hanging out in those trees over there, or a whole horde of vengeful vampires that I've managed to anger in ways I can't even imagine, all just waiting for me to wander past in the dark...what are you going to do about it?" I .

Elisa frowned, caught short. "Well..." she thought for a moment. "I have been told that my screams are impressively loud..."

I rolled my eyes as I leaned down to pick up my pillow. "Fantastic. I feel completely safe now."

As I straightened up, however, a sudden movement in the dark expanse of trees caught my eye and made me gasp. Immediately, Elisa's 'tragic scenario' theory took on a frightening reality. Something was there, something big, something...I stopped for a moment, my eyes narrowed in concentration. Something familiar.

Still, I might have been able to dismiss it as my imagination if the movement hadn't been followed immediately by a quiet snap, like the sound of a foot - or a paw - coming down on a fallen tree branch. No - it couldn't be! But who else -

"What is it?" Elisa hadn't missed my reaction and her head turned to follow my gaze into the trees. "Is there something in there, really?"

"No." I said quickly - too quickly. "Just my overactive imagination at work, which is entirely your fault, by the way." I forced a less than sincere smile on my face.

Elisa didn't look convinced in the least. "Hey!" she suddenly called out in the direction of the forest. "If something's in there, you'd better get lost before - "

"Before what?" I grabbed her arm and hustled her towards the back door. "You scream impressively loudly and terrify the neighbors? There's nothing there. Let's go inside."

As I pushed her in front of me, I turned to look back one more time, not sure what I expected to see, but there was nothing now, no movement, no noise...nothing to tell me that I had been right. And yet, I had a very strong suspicion that someone had been there and that I knew exactly who that person was.

Had Jacob really been there, watching us? And if so, why? Had he wanted to speak to me? What was left to say? For a moment I cursed myself for not insisting that Elisa stay inside, but then I mentally shook my head at myself. There was absolutely no point in going down this path again. There was nothing I could say to Jacob that could make this better for him - both of us would just be ripping old wounds open once more. It wouldn't help him heal or move on, and selfishly, I knew I couldn't face the pain again myself. I would not spend the night before my wedding crying for Jacob. It wasn't fair to any of us.

I was quiet now as we re-entered my bedroom, a certain bittersweet melancholy settling over me as I walked to the window and looked out once more across the empty lawn. Absently, my fingers went to my wrist, touching the silver charm bracelet that still hung there, the wolf, and the heart. Then I unclasped it and slowly turned to walk across the room to my dresser. I opened the jewelry box on top and placed it gently inside, closing the lid once more. That bracelet was something I would always treasure, but I would not wear it any longer. It represented a time when I was torn, the two pieces of my heart that had now healed into something whole, if forever scarred, forever changed.

I turned to see Elisa watching me, then she looked towards the window, and I knew instantly that I hadn't fooled her at all.

"Was it him?" She asked quietly. "Jacob?"

I opened my mouth to deny it, then sighed, my shoulders slumping. "I don't know. Maybe."

Elisa continued to look out the window for a long moment. "If it was, I think he's gone now." She turned back to me, and I was relieved that her face didn't hold the condemnation that I thought it might. Instead, her eyes were frankly sympathetic. She gave me a faint smile, but didn't speak, and for that I was grateful. Clearly, she knew much more about me and Jacob then I could have ever imagined, but even so, that was one conversation I really didn't want to have with her - or with anyone. Not again.

We were both quiet for several minutes before Elisa broke the silence. "I guess we really should try to get some sleep." She walked towards the rolled up sleeping bag on the corner and began untying the strings that held it together.

"Elisa, why don't you take the bed?" I offered. "You are my guest, after all."

Elisa looked up at me, her face aghast. "Are you kidding me? You think I'm going to let you sleep on the floor on the night before your wedding? What kind of bridesmaid do you think I am?"

Her voice was so clearly offended that I didn't press the issue. For the next couple of minutes I helped her untie the tangled cord, then we unrolled the sleeping bag on the small area of floor between the wall and my bed. That done, I tossed her the pillow she'd brought with her and a couple of extra blankets I'd gotten out of the linen closet as well.

I watched Elisa yawn widely as she pulled out a pair of pink pajamas from her overnight bag. "Tired, are you?"

Elisa chuckled a little sheepishly. "Sorry. I didn't think I'd be able to sleep at all, but I stayed up all night last night with Alice and Rosalie. I'm totally beat, and I don't want to be a red-eyed, bleary mess standing next to you tomorrow. Speaking of which, I'm not the only human girl who needs her rest." She looked at my bed significantly.

"You're right." I agreed, although the tension racing through me now, not only at what just happened but over what I was going to endure the next day. How I was ever going to relax enough to sleep I didn't know.

I went back to my dresser and got my pajamas out. "I'll be right back." I told her, and headed down the hallway to the bathroom. Inside, I took my time changing into my pajamas, brushing my teeth, and then washing my face. As I scrubbed my skin, I stared at myself in the mirror, seeing the stranger in my own eyes. I still looked like the same ordinary Bella, and yet I wasn't. I was irrevocably and forever changed - not even close to the same girl who had come to Forks so reluctantly nearly two years ago.

And after tomorrow, I would never be Bella Swan again. I would be Mrs. Edward Cullen. At the thought, I got so dizzy that it was necessary to flip the toilet lid down so I could sit on top of it and gasp for air. It was really happening. Really and truly...I wasn't even nineteen and I was going to walk down the aisle tomorrow, in front of the whole town, and become Edward's wife. I struggled for a moment to get a hold on the tidal wave of emotions rushing through me. I could grasp a few of them immediately. There was fear, panic, wariness, sorrow for two of the most important people in my life -Jacob and Renee- who would not be there...

And yet there was more, so much more, deep under the surface, the feelings that were so personal and made me feel so vulnerable that I didn't like to examine them too closely. There was... Excitement. Anticipation. Joy.

Yes, joy. Because somewhere, underneath all my doubts and prejudices, there was nothing more that I wanted than to be Edward's wife. It was the ultimate culmination of everything I'd ever wanted when I first looked at his angel's face, back when I never, ever could have imagined that his beautiful eyes would ever gaze at me with anything but the briefest acknowledgement. Sometimes I even woke up in the middle of the night convinced it had all been a stunningly vivid dream, for how could this be anything else but a fairytale?

Edward could have anyone he wanted and yet he was bound to me just as permanently as I was to him. He was ready to stand up and let everyone know it. As scared as I still was to put myself out there the way I was going to have to tomorrow, how could I do any less for him? How could I have let my fears and insecurities keep me from letting him know that I was just as proud, just as thrilled, at the thought of being next to him at the altar and pledging my eternal love for him in front of the world? Did he think I was unhappy, or worse, ashamed, to be marrying him?

Tears came to my eyes at the thought, but I smiled to myself as I blinked them away. Surely, Edward knew me better than that. And if he wasn't sure, if his own insecurities were keeping that knowledge from him, then it was up to me to open his eyes. And I would. We had the rest of forever to spend together and I would make sure that he knew that every second that I spent with him was because I wanted it with everything in me. Starting tomorrow, I wouldn't hold anything back - I wanted to make him every bit as happy as he made me, as impossible as that feat seemed.

With that awe-inspiring notion in mind, I decided I'd done enough introspective thinking for one night and left the bathroom. On my way back towards my bedroom, I paused, looking down the staircase towards the main floor, feeling a rush of guilt as I recalled how quiet Charlie had been all night. Had the wedding rehearsal upset him that much? At the very least, it must have really brought home the fact that this was real, that tomorrow he would walk his daughter down the aisle and hand her off to someone else. I should talk to him, no matter how uncomfortable it made either one of us. It was the least I could do for him. After tomorrow, who knew when I'd see him again?

Halfway down the stairs, I realized a conversation with Charlie was not going to happen, at least not tonight. I could hear his snores long before I reached the living room to see him slumped back in his easy chair, oblivious to the world.

"Dad." My voice was low but insistent as I shook him awake. "Come on. Time to get into bed now. We've got a big day tomorrow."

"Bella..." he mumbled as I pulled him to his feet. "..my little girl..." His voice, even thick with sleep, sounded tearful. It was enough to make all my good intentions about a heart to heart fly right out of my head. Alarmed, I pulled harder on his brawny arm. The last thing I needed was for a half-asleep Charlie to fall apart on me. It would be enough to set me off for hours and tomorrow I'd be walking down the aisle with puffy, blood-shot eyes that no amount of make-up would be able to obscure. Like I needed anything else to make the day more humiliating.

Luckily, exhaustion stopped Charlie from saying more, and he collapsed on his bed with a grateful sigh. I tiptoed out his bedroom door and nearly ran down the hallway before he could wake up enough to call me back.

Elisa was still awake and waiting for me when I got back to the room. She'd changed into her own pajamas while I was gone, and was lounging on her sleeping bag with an open paperback in her hand. The cover had a shirtless man with enormous muscles and long blond hair who was passionately embracing a buxom redhead in a much too small dress. Clearly it was not a book she'd found anywhere in my room. With a small pang, I noticed that she'd repacked my own books in the cardboard box, even taking the time to find some tape and seal the lid. It was certainly a thoughtful gesture but I'd been hoping to occupy my too active mind with some Jane Austen. Now I would have nothing to do but stare at the ceiling and well - panic.

"Are you alright, Bella?" Elisa peered up as me as I crawled into bed, trying my best to keep from shaking.

"Fine." I lied as I pulled the covers over my quivering frame. "Just tired, I guess."

Elisa chuckled and then suddenly she sat up, getting to her knees and leaning her chin on the side of the bed so she could see me clearly. "What's it like, Bella, knowing you're going to marry the love of your life in less than twenty-four hours? Everything is going to change for you. You must be so excited!"

At her words, butterflies began to flap angrily in my stomach and for a moment, it felt like the room was spinning. My earlier excitement was being drowned in a sea of terror. It wasn't so much the part about becoming Edward's wife that I minded anymore. It was the fact that everyone was going to watch me walk - well, more like stumble - towards him, listen to my quavering voice recite our vows, stare and whisper as he leaned forward to kiss his bride... It would be like standing in a giant spotlight, with so many people watching what should be an intimate moment. Why had I ever agreed to this?

"Bella?" Elisa's voice was worried now.

I took a deep, shaky breath. "Elisa, can we talk about something else?" I nearly whimpered. "Please? I'm just...I'm totally freaking out." I knew she'd believe that immediately - my voice had a clear note of terror in it.

Elisa watched me anxiously for a moment, then ducked out of sight for a couple of seconds. I jumped as her pillow came flying up from the floor to land at my side on the bed. "Move over, Bella."

I scooted over and Elisa appeared once more, climbing on to the other side of the bed. She adjusted her pillow behind her, then leaned back, smiling reassuringly at me. "Just breathe, Bella. Don't be scared. Everything is going to be OK, I swear. It will all be over before you know it and you two will have nothing but happiness and the best future ever to look forward to. Just think about that."

Obediently, I took deep breaths as her gentle voice continued to soothe me. After a few minutes, the panic receded a bit, and I was able to lay back myself. "Thank you. You are an extremely helpful bridesmaid."

Elisa beamed at me. "You're welcome, Bella." She watched me for a few minutes, my sweaty, pale complexion apparently convincing her that the crisis was not over yet. "You know, at home when I can't sleep, which is pretty much every night lately, Rosalie reads to me."

"Rosalie?" I was startled out of my panic attack for a moment. "Rosalie reads to you?"

"Yep." Elisa smiled once more. "We're almost finished with A Little Princess. I think I'm going to see if I can get her to read The Secret Garden next."

"Huh." I tried to picture this cozy little scenario and failed utterly. Rosalie, reading to Elisa...apparently I'd been so wrapped up in Edward and the wedding that I had missed a lot. Like an entire personality transplant happening right before my eyes. "A Little Princess, huh? I think my mom bought me that book when I was little, but it wasn't one of my favorites. I was never really into princesses."

"What a surprise." Elisa giggled. "Totally abnormal, like I said. Anyway, I thought maybe I could do something similar for you. I uh...I memorized this poem the other day, for reasons we won't get into, and it's really kind of pretty. It's a story more than a poem - do you want to hear it?"

"Sure." I was positive that poetry was not going to calm my raging nerves, but I appreciated her attempt at distraction anyway.

"OK then." Elisa leaned over to snap off the bedside lamp, then adjusted her pillow so she was sitting up a bit more, folded her hands across her waist and began to recite.

You and me--we know that land
And often have been there
In the long old days, old nursery days,
A dark child and a fair.

Was it down the paths of firelight dreams
In winter cold and white,
Or in the blue-spun twilit hours
Of little early tucked-up beds
In drowsy summer night,

That You and I got lost in Sleep
And met each other there--
Your dark hair on your white nightgown,
And mine was tangled fair...

Although I forced myself to focus on the musical rise and fall of her voice, I never really expected it to work. Yet, as my mind began to put images wth her words, my eyes began to close. I watched the tale unfold on the back of my eyelids as I lay there, mentally following the path the story led me down. And as I let my anxiety and worries fade, so did my consciousness, and finally, I slept.

Eventually, the dream began.

The misty green light that filtered through the thick foliage surrounding me was nothing if not familiar. I looked up for a moment at the bit of sky that peeked through the trees, seeing the fast moving clouds that would soon blot out the sun. Although the atmosphere was calm, the wind was beginning to rise a bit, swirling leaves around my ankles, flicking at the hem of the nightgown that was more pristine and white than anything I'd ever worn in real life, and blowing my hair away from my face.

I knew this place where I stood. Distantly, I could hear the rush of the ocean, calling me to its safe, sandy beach, to sanctuary. In the other direction the deepest part of the forest loomed, black and beckoning. Once again, I was caught in the middle.

I waited now, impatient, almost bored, for the dream to play out like it had before. For Jacob to come and try to pull me to safety, for Edward to appear and lure me away with the smile of a stranger. I didn't understand why I had to experience this again. Before, this vision had always had a purpose. First, it was to confirm what deep down, I'd known all along about Edward, and then, to reveal the secret that Jacob himself could not voice. It had been more than that too, although I hadn't realized it at the time. This dream had represented the two worlds I had to choose between, but now I had made my choice. What more was there to learn?

I'd been waiting for several heartbeats when I realized that this time, the pattern was not the same. There was nothing coming, no voices calling my name, no glowing figure emerging from the dark, no wolf at my feet. I was completely alone.

Confused, I turned in a slow circle, feeling twigs and other forest debris crunch under my bare feet. What was I waiting for?

The screams, when they shattered the quiet, jarred me to the soul. For a moment I was so stunned, so frightened, that I couldn't comprehend the sound, but then I realized a high-pitched, terrified voice was screaming Edward's name over and over again. I froze in place, listening, then as I recognized the voice, adrenaline burst into my veins and before I could think it through, I began to run - directly into the heart of the forest.

"Elisa!" My own voice was a scream now. "I'm coming! Where are you?"

Tree branches appeared from seemingly nowhere as I ran, snapping back to strike me in the face after I'd pushed them aside. Treacherous roots caught at my ankles, trying to pull me down, and I stumbled over rocks and fallen trunks as I raced through the shadowy woods. It seemed like the whole forest was conspiring against me, trying to slow my pace, but finally I burst into a small clearing, and then skidded to a sudden stop.

Elisa was several feet away, her back to me, one hand resting lightly on the trunk of the tree next to her as she peered into the dark. I wasn't surprised to see that she was clad in a nightgown identical to mine, or that her hair was pulled back and tied lightly with an old-fashioned, velvet ribbon, but I was bemused by her silence, her calm demeanor.

"Elisa?" My voice was a near whisper now, and she turned her head to look at me over her shoulder.

For a moment she was silent, surveying me, then her eyebrows raised slightly and she smiled. "I'd almost forgotten that I'm not the only one who dreams."

I shook my head, trying to clear the cobwebs. "What's happening? I heard you screaming..." My stomach twisted as I spoke.

"Was I?" Her voice was distant as she turned to look through the trees once more. "I don't remember. Then again, memory isn't really my strength these days, is it?"

"Right." I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to rub the chill out of my skin. Somehow, the calm of her voice was almost more frightening then the screaming. "Edward told me about that. I'm sorry."

She shrugged. "Don't be. It's for the best."

"Why?" It was almost like the words coming out of my mouth were planned, like I was reciting from a script I hadn't even been aware that I'd memorized. "Because the memories are too painful?"

"No." Elisa was still looking away from me. "I can handle the pain. But it's safer this way, if I forget, better for all of us. Some things are just too dangerous to remember."

"I don't understand." I whispered.

"Me neither, not really." She admitted. Her body remained angled away from me, towards something I could not - did not want - to see.

"You were calling for Edward." I recalled suddenly. "Where is he?"

Elisa sighed now. "Running backwards. They're coming first. He'll never get here in time." She lifted her head and stared upwards at the still moving clouds in the sky.

My heart, which had almost returned to its normal pace, sped up again at her words, hammering so hard that I was sure it would beat its way out of my chest. "In time for what?"

She didn't answer. I didn't have the energy to press her further. I was beginning to feel sick now, like the air I was breathing was too heavy. My head was spinning dizzily and I wanted nothing more than to just wake up and leave all this confusion behind me. I tried to breathe deeply, hoping the fresh air would clear out whatever it was that was building in my chest, stifling me.

"Bella..." Elisa's voice was a whisper now, and for the first time since I'd found her here, I heard fear in it. Startled, I looked at her, and then followed her gaze towards the sky. Even as I watched, the clouds slowed their pace, and then stuttered to a complete stop. I watched in wonder as they remained completely still for a few seconds, then abruptly changed direction, moving back along the path that they had already taken. At the same time the wind switched direction as well, blowing my hair all around my face now, obscuring my vision.

"What's happening to me, Bella?" Her voice was younger now, more vulnerable, more of the Elisa that I knew.

"I don't know." I whispered back. "You've never told me your secrets." My stomach rolled abruptly, and I stopped trying to make sense of my own words, or of anything else, as a sickening realization hit me. I knew now why I felt so nauseated. The scent was clogging up my nostrils, drowning out the more benign smells of the forest, growing stronger, overwhelming me... Why hadn't I seen it sooner? Why hadn't I realized that there was a reason Elisa wouldn't face me? I stared at her hand, the one that still rested on the tree trunk, finally registering the dark substance that coated it.

"Elisa..." My voice was ragged now, terrified, but still, I had to see... "Elisa, turn around."

Slowly, she did, and as she faced me my stomach convulsed more violently than ever. Blood was spilled over her front, still wet, sticky, soaking through her white nightgown in angry splotches. The worst of it, though, was on her hands, coating her pale flesh as if she'd deliberately plunged her hands into a bucket of gore. My head spun more than ever at the sight.

I lurched away, feeling ashamed as I did so, knowing I should go to her, try to help, but the sight repelled me. "What happened to you?" The words burst forth from my lips.

"Oh, this?" Elisa looked down at the crimson coating her body as if it were nothing more than a bothersome grass stain. "Only what is inevitable. It's coming back, full circle. I learned my lesson well, but you knew this long before I ever did." Her eyes were sorrowful now. "I'm so sorry, Bella."

"Why are you apologizing to me?" I stared at her, trying to comprehend her words. "You're the one who's hurt! Tell me what I can do, Elisa, please! Tell me how to help you!"

"You don't understand." Elisa whispered.

"Don't understand what?" My voice was desperate now.

Elisa stepped forward, and reached out to touch my face gently. I didn't want her hands on me, not with all that blood clinging to them, but I couldn't seem to move away. I let her fingers gently trail my cheek. As I watched, tears began to spill down her face. I struggled to comprehend what she was trying to tell me, why her face was so full of sadness and then suddenly, it clicked, and fear pressed in on me, chilling me from the inside out until I was shaking.

I understood now what she did not want to say, why her eyes were so full of regret. It wasn't her blood that covered her and made her look like an extra in a horror film.

It was mine.

Abruptly, the forest was gone, the dream ripped away, and I was sitting up in my bed, gasping, sucking in the air that was rapidly washing the scent of blood out of my nostrils. Wildly, I looked around, trying to get my bearings. Belatedly, I realized that Elisa had sat up in the bed as well, her own breathing rapid. We stared at each other with wide eyes and for a moment, there was no other sound beside that of our combined hyperventilating.

Elisa was the first to calm down. She surveyed me with her green eyes, suddenly looking sympathetic. "You had a nightmare."

"Didn't you?" I blurted out, still barely awake.

For a moment there was a flicker of something - recognition? - in her eyes, but then it was gone and her face was only puzzled. "I don't think so. I don't remember if I was dreaming at all." She yawned lightly, then gave me another concerned look. "You look completely green. I guess the poetry was a bust. I'm going to get you a glass of water."

She started to crawl off the bed, but I reached out and grabbed her arm. "No...stay." My voice shook slightly, embarrassing me, but I knew I couldn't stand to be alone at the moment. The memory of the nightmare, the scent of my own blood, was still vivid in my mind, making my chest tighten all over again. Strange how just a little while ago my worst fear had been the wedding ceremony tomorrow, and now it seemed so petty, so far away, dwarfed by the terror my nocturnal wanderings had brought me.

Elisa hesitated for a moment, then nodded, sliding back onto the bed and leaning against her pillow. She patted my pillow, indicating I should do the same, and waited until I obeyed. She hesitated for a moment, then took my cold hand in her warm one, squeezing it lightly. "It was just a bad dream, Bella, that's all. The nerves are getting to you. Everything is going to be alright, I promise. Breathe deeply, and try to relax. Think about something peaceful, something that makes you feel safe." Her own eyes looked heavy as she spoke - clearly, she was exhausted.

For a moment trying to calm down seemed like a completely futile gesture, but then Edward's face came into my head with barely any effort at all, filling my mind with nothing but the perfection of his features. His eyes were soft, golden, and warm, looking back at me, and warmth spread through my body, easing me. I knew what he'd say if he were here. I could hear the words again in my head, what he'd said to me the last time we were in the meadow...

"Bella, after everything you've been through, it's natural that you would be wary, even frightened, of what could be next. Add what happened to Elisa on top of all that, and you have a complete recipe for paranoia. But there's nothing out there now, nothing that wants to harm you. Even if there was, do you really think I'd let anything happen to you?"

'No.' I told fantasy Edward in my head. 'I know you wouldn't. You're right - I'm being paranoid.' I felt relief war with leftover fear as I forced myself to think logically. After everything that had happened to me, of course I was still afraid. I probably had post traumatic stress disorder or whatever it was called. But there was no reason for me to be scared now, not of anything beyond tomorrow and the ordeal it held. I would be safe with Edward, and soon, I'd be strong, invincible - then I'd be a force to be reckoned with myself. Not vulnerable or weak - not a liability.

Now I could feel the tiredness that I'd been too keyed up to notice before, seeping into my bones, and I allowed my eyes to close once again, pretending Edward's arms were around me, forcing myself to ignore the last bits of fear as I finally began to drift off once more.

Edward:

And now i tell you openly
You have my heart so don't hurt me
You're what i couldn't find
A totally amazing mind
So understanding and so kind
You're everything to me

'Dreams', The Cranberries

I climbed out of the Volvo, exerting just enough pressure on the driver's side door for it to shut with a firm click that would have barely registered on human ears. Of course, to every person in my house the sound was a signal. They'd already known I was there - they had heard me coming up the driveway minutes ago, but now they knew I was on my way inside and their thoughts crested and reached a fever pitch. The wide variety of their inner words brought out a tidal wave of emotion in me, everything from love and gratitude to irritation and even embarrassment. I stayed still where I was for the moment, preparing myself for the onslaught.

I was so afraid this day would never come and now that it's almost here - is this what it was like, to dream as a human? I can barely remember now but I'm afraid I'll open my eyes and it all would have been a wish in my head...

Finally - nice of him to tear himself away from his human to spend a few minutes with his family! Hope it wasn't too much of a burden...

Man, could he move any slower? He must know what Jasper and I want to talk to him about...c'mon, Edward, you can't avoid us all night..

Could he really be considering what Emmett says he's considering? Would Edward really be that foolish? I have to speak to him...

I am so proud, my son, so very proud...

Edward, stop stalling and get in this house now! Everyone's been waiting for you!

At Alice's summons, I grinned despite myself. A few seconds later I was walking in the door and into the living room. They were all there, standing throughout the room, waiting.

"It's about time!" Alice burst out at my entrance. She danced forward to throw herself in my arms, hugging me tightly. "Can you believe it, Edward? Just a few more hours and you'll be a married man." She took a deep, shuddering breath as she stepped back and surveyed me. "I think the rehearsal tonight went very well, don't you? I know Bella was nervous, but it wasn't so bad. Of course, I hope she doesn't fall tomorrow but even if she does - well, as long as she doesn't break anything it's all good. Everything is going to go perfectly -well, there's a little hiccup with the flowers and there's something else you need to take care of too but - "

"Alice." I cut her off mid-stream. "I can see Bella is not the only one who's nervous."

For a moment she looked irked that I had caught her, then her lips twitched into a smile. "I can't help it. I've looked and looked and everything is fine right now, but - I've been waiting for this day, Edward, for so long. Far longer than you - I knew it was going to happen way back when you were still trying to make Bella into nothing more than a memory. Now it's here and it's almost too good to be true. Can you blame me for being just a little anxious?"

"Alice," I said again, and stepped forward to put my hands on her tiny shoulders. "Have I mentioned lately how very much I owe you?"

"Hmmm." she pursed her lips. "Now that I think about it...no." She grinned. "There's only one thing I want from you right now, Edward, and that is to see you and Bella standing side by side tomorrow at the altar. So please, don't get any last minute doubts, or moronic notions of self-sacrifice and mess it all up and I'll consider us even. Alright?"

"Understood." I pulled her tiny frame closer to me for another hug, and leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Without you, none of this would be happening. Don't think that I have ever forgotten that, Alice."

Alice took a deep breath and pulled back. In a very human gesture, she waved her small hands in front of her face as if warding off tears, and then beamed at me. "Stop it before I get all emotional. I still have a lot to double-check and I don't need you to distract me. Besides, I'm not the only person who wanted to speak to you." Gracefully, she stepped aside, and Esme came forward, her arms outstretched.

"Edward..." she breathed as she embraced me. "I don't even know how to put into words how happy I am for you and Bella. This day took its sweet time getting here, but it's been worth the wait."

I just nodded, smiling down at her as she beamed back up at me, then suddenly her face was serious. "I prayed for you, Edward, to a God that I wasn't even sure would acknowledge me any longer. I prayed that you would find a reason for this life, and that you wouldn't have to live it alone. And He sent you Bella. You haven't been forgotten - none of us have. When you look at your bride tomorrow, remember that."

"Thank you. I will." My voice was hoarse as we pulled apart, and I squeezed her hand in mine, not trusting my voice to say more. Esme nodded, her own eyes bright with emotion, and then my father stepped forward.

He was beaming, his eyes crinkled at the corners as he surveyed me, and then he raised his arms in an elegant shrug. "What is left for me to say? I'm so happy for you, Edward, and so proud."

"Thank you, Father, for everything. For saving me, for putting up with me all these years, for accepting me back again and again. I can only imagine what a trial I must have been to you."

Carlisle smiled at me again and shook his head. "Edward, after all these years, you still don't truly understand, do you? You speak as if you were such a burden to me and that was never the case. You gave me back everything - hope, purpose, a reason to continue. You have always been such a gift to me. I've often wondered how it would have gone if I had chosen less wisely - if it hadn't been you, if it had been someone not as pure, not as strong, would I have had the courage to try again? I don't think so. There would have been no Esme, no one following after her, no 'us' at all. I don't even think there would have been a me by this point. Don't you realize? You saved me too."

I was at a rare loss for words, trying to find a way to possibly convey to Carlisle what I was feeling at the moment, when my brothers came up on either side of me.

"Sorry to break up such a tender moment, but it's our turn now." Emmett grinned down at me. "Come on, Edward...let's walk." He slung a muscular arm around my shoulder hard enough to make me stumble. On the other side of me, Jasper did the same, and then I was being frogmarched towards the glass doors that opened onto the back lawn.

I was torn between relief that they had lightened the seriously emotional atmosphere and embarrassment at what I knew was coming. Sure enough, as soon as we got outside Emmett turned to me.

"So, our Edward is finally taking the plunge." He grinned wickedly. "By tomorrow night, you're going to be a married man. And that is why - well, it is our solemn duty, as your brothers, to clue you in on a few facts of life. You might want to sit down for this one." He indicated the patio chair next to me.

I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes skyward. "I've been around longer than you have, Emmett, and I've witnessed quite a bit. I think we can safely consider that I am sufficiently 'clued in' already."

"No, no, Edward, not so fast now." Emmett shook his finger at me. "Hearing and seeing through other's eyes is not the same as experiencing it yourself. Now this is one area where I know a hell of a lot more than you, so I suggest you relax and listen up, little brother."

I tensed and began to frown, but then the atmosphere lightened considerably, and despite myself I began to relax. I found myself smiling reluctantly as I turned to Jasper. "Thanks. Fine, you two - go ahead. I'm listening."

"Wait a second." Jasper interrupted whatever Emmett had been about to say. "Emmett's right? Are you serious? Are you really planning to - with Bella -before she's changed?" He stared at me. "Edward, you've got to understand how dangerous that is!"

I stared down at my feet, knowing that if I had been human, I would be purple by now. "Jasper, I have considered all the...ramifications, believe me, I have. It's the only thing Bella has asked me for, the one human experience she doesn't want to miss, and I promised her that I would try. I will be careful, I swear it."

Jasper stared hard at me. "Emmett's right, Edward. You really don't know what you're talking about, no matter how much you've seen. When you're with a woman, making love to her, you're going to experience feelings and sensations that you have never even conceived of before. Your body and your instincts will take over in a way that's just as intense and still totally different then the strongest of blood lust. You're taking a far more immense risk then you realize. It will be easier than you understand to lose control. Don't do this now. Tell her that you've changed your mind, that you have to wait. It's for the best."

My insides twisted now with indecision and longing as I considered his words, and the promise I'd made to Bella. My conflict must have been apparent on my face, because Emmett frowned and then pushed Jasper aside.

"Hey now, let's not forget exactly who we're talking about here." He gave Jasper an exasperated look. "This is Edward, king of self-control! Look at what he's managed to resist so far! He should have killed Bella that first day. Any one of us would have done it, if they'd been faced with what he had. Even Alice would have done it, Jasper, and don't give me that look. You know she would have. But Edward learned at the knee of the master, and he learned well. You're stronger than all of us, bro. If you really believe that you can do this, then I say full speed ahead." He grinned at me, then snickered as he registered his own words. "Well, ok, maybe not full speed ahead. Women get irritated if things go a bit too quickly." He laughed now.

Jasper was still shaking his head, but as his eyes met mine he stilled, then shrugged. "I suppose Emmett has a point. Alright - it's your decision. Just be sure you've really thought it through."

"Thanks." I muttered, running a hand through my hair. "Both of you." I turned back towards the house, relieved to have this small torture over with, but Emmett stepped in front of me once again, blocking my path. I groaned as his thoughts reached me before his words did.

"Hey! Where are you rushing off to? We aren't done yet, not by a long shot. Don't you want to reap the benefits of our expertise?"

"Oh, please." I grimaced. "I've unfortunately been subjected to the visual more times then I care to recall." I looked at Emmett's determined face, then sighed, slumping into the patio chair. "Fine. Teach me, O Wise Ones."

Jasper just laughed, shoving his lean hands into his pockets, content to step back and let Emmett do all the talking. Emmett was still grinning wickedly as he pulled up another chair and sat down, angled towards me.

"Alright, here we go. First of all, Edward, when a man and a woman really love each other - "

"Oh, shut up!" I started to stand, but Emmett's legs kicked out in a flash and knocked me back into the chair.

"Relax, Eddie, I'm just having fun with you. But seriously though..." He leaned forward to capture my gaze. "Just...take it slow and easy. Don't worry about making it perfect, or getting everything right. Let your instincts take over - well, not all over of them - but the right ones. Let her take the lead...follow her cues. You'll find that both of you know more than you could have ever imagined." He stood up now, and I followed suit, amused to see that for once, he was actually looking a bit embarrassed himself.

"I'm truly happy for you. Both of you. You know that, right?" Emmett's voice was still uncharacteristically serious as he faced me.

"I do, Emmett. Thank you."

I turned to Jasper, and he just smiled. "You're not going to ask me to make a speech too, are you? You already know that this is what I want for you. Congratulations, Edward." He grabbed me now, pulling me in a for an appropriately manly hug, meaning that we barely touched before he pulled away and slapped me hard enough on the back that it was a good thing I didn't need my lungs anymore - I was pretty sure he'd damaged them beyond repair.

"Come on, let's go inside so Esme can gush over you some more." Emmett indicated the bright light spilling out of the windows.

"Just give me a minute." I nodded at them, indicating they should go on ahead. In a quick rush, they were gone. I remained seated, feeling the wind begin to rise around me, rushing the few clouds out of the surprisingly clear night sky. I looked up, observing the bright stars that were usually hidden behind a thick blanket of gray or black. I wasn't worried about the fact that the skies were so bright. According to Alice, tomorrow would begin with sunshine, but the clouds would roll in by eleven and it would stay overcast, but dry, for the rest of the day. The ceremony itself would not begin until one o'clock so we were completely safe. Our wedding day would be perfect.

Our wedding day... I let that thought chase everything else away, any lingering fears or doubts, until there was nothing left but the glowing happiness that I still suspected I didn't truly deserve. I no longer cared. It was mine, and I was holding on to it with both hands. After tomorrow, nothing would ever separate Bella from me again.

Are you going to stay outside all night?

Alice's mental summons brought me out of my thoughts and I looked up to see her framed in the back doorway, waiting. I jumped to my feet and together, we walked back into the house to be greeted by smiles from nearly everyone - except Rosalie. I looked over to see her on her usual window seat, dark eyes fixed on me. At my glance she raised an eyebrow.

Remembered me, have you?

I frowned. Underneath the sarcasm, there was just a twinge of hurt. As I was considering what to say to her without the two of us getting into yet another argument, Emmett spoke up, interrupting the moment.

"So this is it, Edward - your last night of freedom. We're not just going to sit around the house, are we? Come on, let's go! Let's do something!" His feet were already moving back and forth anxiously as he waited for my response.

I frowned as his mind went through a quick list of possibilities - each more dangerous than the last, and none particularly appealing to me. "I don't think so, Emmett."

"It's up to you, sweetheart." It was Esme that spoke up now. "This is your night - you can spend it however you want it."

"Really?" I thought for a moment, then looked over at Alice. "However I want?"

"Of course." Alice agreed absently, her mind back on her checklist, then suddenly she caught the tone of my voice and turned to scowl at me. "Edward! No! It's bad luck!"

Heads were turning, looking back and forth between us, and I saw understanding dawn on the rest of my family's faces.

"Dude, you are so whipped." Emmett shook his head and made a cracking noise.

I wasn't listening for the rest of their reactions. My eyes were back on Alice, waiting for her response. She knew what I wanted, but if it was truly going to make her anxious, I'd stick it out here. It was the least I could do for her after all she'd done for me and Bella. Although I'd have to make her feel excruciatingly guilty about it, just to pass the time.

"Edward." Alice's voice was an impatient growl. My eyes must have been more pleading then I realized. "You really can't spend just one night away from her?"

"You said I could spend this night any way I wanted." I pointed out. "It's what I want. Besides, I don't believe in luck, bad or otherwise."

Alice's face went reluctantly blank as she checked to make sure I wasn't about to set some monumental disaster into motion, and then she sighed. "Fine. Go. Be back early or you'll be hopping down the aisle on one leg." Her glare dissolved into a grin as I kissed her cheek.

"Thank you!" I whispered in her ear, and then, with an unapologetic grin for the rest of them, I turned towards the door. A low, mental hiss caught my attention before I could move through it though, and I turned back to see Rosalie standing now, her arms folded across her chest as she glowered at me.

"I haven't forgotten, Rosalie." I said hastily, although I had. "I'll be back early. We'll talk then, I promise."

I'll hold you to that. She frowned at me for one more moment, before dismissing me from her thoughts, her mind turning to plans for distracting Emmett from his disappointment over my abandoning ship. With a last grateful look at her -which she ignored- I was off and running.

The trees streaked by as I traveled the path I'd so often taken, going back to the only place I wanted to be. The run was exhilarating, but still, I was relieved when I found myself reaching the edge of the trees that bordered Bella's lawn. I stopped there, staring up at her darkened window for a moment, just breathing in the familiar scent of her home.

My nose twitched and I inhaled again, then exhaled in disgust, a low growl issuing automatically from my throat. I forced myself to shake it off, to straighten from the attacking stance I'd instinctively fallen into. I looked around now, deliberately breathing in this time, allowing my mind to open, searching.

No, there was no one here now, but he'd been here earlier...Jacob. There was no mistaking that scent. Why had he come here? Had he spoken to her, tried to get her to change her mind? Was she with him right now?

Fighting against my sudden, irrationally raging jealousy I crept forward slowly on to the lawn. The fury quickly washed away as his scent immediately began to fade - he'd come no closer than these trees, and there was no indication that she'd gone to him, either. I felt almost weak with relief, and at the same time, utterly foolish. I had faith in Bella. She'd chosen me. And as for Jacob Black - how could I hate him? Because he loved her? Because he owned a corner of her heart that I could never touch? Nothing ever would have happened between them if I hadn't left her, and I had to accept the consequences for what I'd done.

It didn't matter. I'd worry about Jacob Black in the morning. For now, I had much better things to do. Springing forward, I jumped, clinging to the wall below her window with the tips of my fingers, silently climbing upwards. I paused just before I peered over the window ledge. I could smell her delicious scent so clearly now, just feet away from me, mingling with Elisa's spicier smell. Farther away, I sensed Chief Swan, his senses and odors clouded by the six pack he'd consumed earlier that night. He was restless, and dreaming. Elisa slept too, her mind a confusing jumble of images that I didn't have any desire to delve into.

I was relieved to find the window still open, and silently, I climbed over the sill and then sat down on it, allowing my eyes to finally seek her out. My Bella...she was sleeping on her side, curled towards me, an arm slightly over her face. I could see that her brow was furrowed in the moonlight, and even in slumber she seemed tense. I saw with a little surprise that Elisa was on the other side of the bed, facing away from me. Apparently, the sleeping bag idea had been abandoned. I couldn't really blame her there - the floor didn't look very comfortable.

I didn't go any further into the room then the window sill. This was all I had wanted - one last chance to watch Bella as she slept, not knowing that I was there. The feeling that it created in me, to see her lying there, took me back to the first night I'd come here. Did she even know how lost in her I'd been then, how utterly perplexed by my own fascination with her every word and gesture? I had barely been able to grasp the depth of my feelings then, and now - well, with time it seemed that they would be tempered, not so vivid, fading perhaps, into comfort and easy familiarity but it was not that way with us. Every moment I spent with Bella felt like I was discovered something new and unheard of all over again. I could spend forever here and never grow tired of the sight.

Gah! Edward!

To my own surprise, I nearly jumped at the sound of my name being thought so loudly, and then I looked to see Elisa sitting up in the bed, staring at me. Her green eyes were clouded with sleep but still, they were wide and staring. I had been so absorbed in my own thoughts and emotions that I hadn't realized she was waking up. Mentally, I cursed myself for being so careless. With a sigh, I realized that if I left immediately, she'd probably fall right back asleep and not remember a thing in the morning. I was trying to convince myself that this was the best course of action when Elisa's eyes narrowed slightly. She was too tired to speak out loud, but her thoughts were as sharp as ever.

I can't believe I used to think it was romantic that you watched Bella as she slept. You're totally creepy.

My lips twitched. "Sorry." I whispered, barely audible, hoping she'd be able to read my lips in the moonlight. "I'm leaving now."

Wait.

I paused as Elisa rubbed her eyes, then looked back at me and sighed. Stay. Bella had a nightmare and she's been restless ever since. I think she'd sleep better with you here. With that, she abruptly rolled off the bed, landing with a soft thud on her sleeping bag. I could hear the nylon rustling as she climbed inside of it, pulling the fabric over her head.

Cautiously, I crept over to the bed, climbing onto the still warm side that Elisa had just vacated. I looked down at her, or rather the lump in the sleeping bag that was all I could see of her, and felt a rush of gratitude. "Thank you, Elisa." My voice was still nearly silent, but I knew she could hear me.

Whatever. If everything goes to hell tomorrow it's all your fault, I hope you know.

I couldn't help but chuckle softly and suddenly Bella moved, turning over and nuzzling into my side. "Edward..." she breathed lightly, still asleep, and I felt the tension drain out of her body. I leaned down and pressed my lips to her hair.

"Sleep, Bella. I'm here now...no more nightmares." A slight smile curved her lips as I smoothed a lock of hair off of her face, and then she was still once more.

"Good night, Elisa." I leaned over the side of the bed to whisper to my newest sibling.

Good night, Stalker Boy.

I laughed silently to myself at Elisa's final thought before she drifted off to sleep once more. I was still feeling very grateful to her and just a tad bit guilty for teasing her so much about the driving lessons. Then again, she truly had been a disaster behind the wheel - bad enough for me to genuinely worry about her safety if she ever managed to lure some dim-witted DMV clerk into giving her a license. Maybe I'd still get her a car for her birthday though...with a driver to go along with it.

Beside me, Bella stirred once more, immediately diverting my thoughts back to her. Worried that some inadvertent movement I had made was disturbing her, I held completely still, not even breathing, until she was quiet again. Then I relaxed slightly, leaning back against Elisa's pillow, closing my eyes as I absorbed Bella's human warmth into my cold skin. It was, as always, an extraordinary feeling. Everything about this night was extraordinary - both an end and a beginning. The beginning of a future I looked forward to in ways I could never have imagined just a few short years ago. Bella had changed everything when she'd come into my life. I remembered what Carlisle had said to me earlier, when I'd thanked him for saving me, and I realized how well I could apply those words to her as well. She'd always considered me her hero, the one who had protected her life over and over, but she didn't know how much she'd done for me in return.

Don't you realize, Bella? You saved me too.

Unable to help myself, I pulled her gently over to me and into my arms. Her eyes fluttered open lightly and then she smiled at me. "I knew you'd come back." Her whisper trailed off and she closed her eyes again, putting her head on my chest. Her voice was exhausted, and I realized, just as I thought with Elisa earlier, that she would probably not remember this in the morning. With a smile, I tightened my arms ever so slightly around her as she drifted off again, and I settled back to wait for dawn to break on the happiest day of my life.

So far.

To Be Continued...

Credits:

Lyrics from Like a Virgin/Madonna

The poem that Elisa was reciting is called The Cottage of Lost Play by J.R.R. Tolkien.

Thank you again so much for reading this very long chapter! I would love to hear your feedback.

In chapter seven, it's the morning of the wedding and all is not going smoothly. A carelessly blurted out revelation rattles the bride, and unexpected guests come in threes...

The wedding day (and night -gulp-) is going to take a few chapters to get through - it is a major event, after all. Lots going on! :D