Chapter 51: The Time Traveler's Husband
[Scene: ?]
[Zoi can't see where he is since he has his eyes closed, but the air is salty. He can feel a coastal breeze, and hear seabirds, so he knows he's near the ocean. He can smell wine and hear masculine voices talking in a foreign language.]
Kunzite: You can open your eyes now.
[Zoi opens his eyes and sees they're in an open air tavern on the side of a hill. No walls, just white marble pillars holding up a roof. Beyond is a stone built city with more hills covered in Cyprus trees and citrus.]
[He and Kunzite are still wearing their normal clothes from school, but the people around him are dressed in togas or knee-length tunics and sandals.]
[Many of the girls in the tavern have garlands of leaves or flowers in their hair. At first Zoi can't help but notice that all the girls seem rather homely– with close-cropped hair, square faces, and broad shoulders, but on closer examination, he realizes that what he assumed were girls are actually young men wearing copious amounts of lipstick, rouge, and eye-liner. There isn't an actual female anywhere to be seen.]
[Zoi doesn't bother to hide his disappointment. When Kunzite told him he was going to take him somewhere extraordinary, he had no idea what to expect. But given that it's their honeymoon, he was expecting something a little more intimate and remarkable than a costume party in some seedy European gay bar. The only remarkable thing Zoi can see is that nobody is looking at either him or Kunzite, in spite of their normal street clothes, and Kunzite's stunning good looks.]
Zoi: Sorry, Kunzite. I don't know where we are, but since I have to guess, I'd say we're at a toga party at some tourist trap in the middle of the Mediterranean.
[Kunzite laughs]
Kunzite: You're two-thirds right. We in a tourist trap in the Mediterranean, but you'll have to be a little more specific. [looks over his shoulder] I'll give you a clue. These aren't costumes. We are in the past.
Zoi: [blinks and looks around] We're in the past? You can travel through time?
Kunzite: In a very limited and unpredictable fashion, yes.
Zoi: But doesn't that create paradoxes and things?
[Kunzite shakes his head.]
[As a couple of people walk past, Kunzite holds his arm out to block them. They do not slow down and instead pass through him like they are made of smoke.]
Zoi: So this is a hologram?
Kunzite: Not exactly. We have traveled in time and everything you see is real, but we are viewing it from a different dimension.
[Zoi looks around. Everything seems completely real, but not one person seems aware he and Kunzite are even there]
Zoi: Why can we see them when they can't see us?
Kunzite: We are like ghosts from the future. These people are a part of our reality; we are not a part of theirs. So we can see them, but not interact with them or make any changes. They, on the other hand, cannot sense our presence at all.
[Zoi bends to pick up a stone. It feels real, but when he tries to lift it, it evaporates through fingers]
Zoi: So I can't take anything from here?
Kunzite: No.
Zoi: That's a shame, I've been collecting flower petals from all our trips so far.
[Kunzite conjures a rose with a single row of pink petals and a yellow center.]
Zoi: [accepts it with delight] Is there nothing you can't do?
Kunzite: There is quite a lot I can't do, actually. But eternal life, combined with a tremendous amount of mystical energy, fortified by thousands upon thousands of tomes on dark magic does tend to have its longterm benefits.
Zoi: Can the other Shitennou open these portals into the past?
Kunzite: No. Only me. The others lack my sense of nostalgia. [looks back and sighs] It's a pity I couldn't get you here before the earthquake, but that time was so short and these portals are impossible to tune with such exact precision.
Zoi: [narrows his eyes] You brought me here for an earthquake?
Kunzite: No, to see something that stood here before the earthquake. [smirks] Ready to guess what that might be?
Zoi: [shrugs] I'm sorry, Kunzite, but I really have no idea where we are.
Kunzite: That's because you're facing the wrong direction. Turn around.
[Zoi turns around and sees a stunning azure blue harbor filled with wooden ships with oars and square sails. A huge crowd of people in tunics and togas are gathered. Some are looking up, most are looking down, and many have parchments out and are taking notes or drawing.]
Kunzite: …A little more…
[Zoi turns a little more to his left and almost faints.]
[For a moment his mind is unable to take in the image before him. When it does he has to clasp his hands to his mouth and sinks to his knees in shock. Kunzite embraces him from behind to hold him steady.]
[Zoi's facing a fifty foot tall marble platform. On top of which are two bronze legs, sheared off at the knee, with rusty girders sticking out of the top of them. Lying on the ground at the base of the platform is the rest of the statue, broken into several pieces. It bears an uncanny resemblance to the Statue of Liberty, except it is twice as big, and obviously male, since it has no clothing other than a crown of sunbeams. A lifelike face is staring up at them and that head alone is almost twice as wide as Zoi is tall.]
Zoi: [frightened] That's impossible!
Kunzite: [nuzzles him] You've figured it out, then?
Zoi: [tries to wake up since this can't be anything but a dream] No! I have no idea what this is!
Kunzite: Guess.
Zoi: Some eccentric oil sheikh's private island?
Kunzite: That statue is not an imitation.
Zoi: [shakes his head vigorously] I…I don't know what this is. I really don't.
Kunzite: Very well, tell me what this couldn't possibly be.
Zoi: The Colossus of Rhodes!
Kunzite: [conjures up the gift and hands it to him] I knew you could do it.
Zoi: [spins around] But the Colossus of Rhodes is one of the Seven Wonders of the World! It doesn't exist anymore! It was melted down for scrap metal several thousand years ago!
[Zoi slowly begins to comprehend what Kunzite has done for him. Zoi grabs hold of Kunzite and looks at him with big worshipping eyes.]
Kunzite: [cups Zoi's head in his hands and gazes into his eyes] Nobody else can give this to you. Nobody. Always remember that.
Zoi: You didn't need to do this… but thank you so much!
[They kiss for several minutes, while people dissipate to smoke and rematerialize as they walk though them.]
Kunzite: I'm sorry. I'm trying to be a gentleman, but I want to make love to you so badly right now…Should we find a room?
[Zoi looks at all the people walking around knowing they can't see him doesn't make Zoi any more comfortable since he can see them.]
Zoi: I suppose we'd better.
Kunzite: I know of a very pretty frescoed and mosaic summer palace with a green velvet bed owned by a prince who is between mistresses at the moment. Or else a very gaudy room reserved for royalty done up in gold and black marble in a nearby bordello. Both will be unoccupied. Which would you prefer?
Zoi: Why chose? Why not try both?
[Kunzite's brows raise]
Zoi: Do we have time for both?
Kunzite: [smiles] Oh, we have time.